My name is Rainald Francis Xavier Lim Rui Nan...
Juz call me Rain for short...
Online names are darkprophecies and rainandshine217...
Im Juz an average 18 yr old kid with no outstanding qualities bah...
Borned on the day 5 dec 1991...
Saggitarus is my sign...
Fav food is friend rice...
Fav color is baby blue...
Im currently teacing in Montfort Secondary School this year...
Im in the Montfort Sec Sch Alumni Band and Montfort Junior School alumni...
Im Single but cared for by my loved ones...
Im a Roman Catholic...
My dream is to become somone who can serve the world...
Juz like wad God asked us to do...
Im oso a very lonely person...
Always alone de
Its not tt im antisocial...
its juz tt im not a person ppl like sticking with
i wana make frendz...
those who r willing to stick by me for everything...
those who can hear my probs understand me and love me
I oso wana find someone who is willing
to spend time to understand me...
Others go for chio girls and stuff....
But im simple...
I go for simple girls who can understand and treasure love...
Im oso a very sensitive person and very emotional de...
so if u see anything happen to me...well dun be shocked...
Im oso a so-called psychologist bah...
got any sch family or wadeva problems can find me...
I dun mind listening or helping...
anyway im oso a very gentle person...
who doesnt like to pick fights or quarrels de
cos i dun believe in violence
im oso somone who fight for justice or for LOVE!!!
im somone who give in to ppl de so very easily get bullied de lar
I come from a family of 14...
My mum, my jiejie, my korkor, my 8 didis, my 4 meimeis
My interests:
Duno. Not sure. Anything tt interests me haha
Maybe listening to music?
Playing my flute and saxaphone?
And oso spending time with my loved ones bah
And erm playing maple? for the sake of my frendz?
btw if u wan add me darrkshadow currently lev88 chiefdit
and darrkmagic lev 154 Bishop (my main)
Add me on msn darkprophecies@hotmail.com
Things/PPL I like/love :
~Playing my Pearl flute~
~Playing my alto Saxaphone(haha im not onli a flute player =p)~
~Playing my dizi~
~Playing my guitar~
~Playing my keyboard~
~Playing maple~
~Hanging out with friends doing nothing~
~Staring at Clouds~
~TAlking and playing with my B34r5
(carrot aka tigger, tomato aka pooh, croco aka crocodile, frosty aka snowman mickey, simba, pong pong aka bolster, sparky aka pikachu, fireball aka charmander)~
~making new friends~
~Sitting on the beach alone at night hearing the wind and waves~
~Staring to the night sky watching stars with somone~
~To love, care and understand somone~
~My mummy ( both real life and maple)~
~My kor and jie~
~My 9 dearest Didis~
~My 4 Wonderful meimeis~
My Greatest wish:
~To be with my loved ones forever~
~To go star gazing with my loved ones
(granted by baobei didi at vivo sky garden on 4 Jan 2009)~
~To sit at the beach with my loved ones enjoying the waves and the starz
(granted by cute didi on 5 dec 2007)~
~To see my loved ones smile everytime~
Things i want:
~A powell platinum flute (Lol 60k... wun come so easily)~
~A Panflute (coming soon ^^)~
~A Soprano Sax (after my flute is cleared)~
~A Violin~ (after my soprano)~
~A husky softtoy(any kind souls get it for my bdae?)~
~Somone who can love and care for me~
~Somone who understands me~
~Somone to be there for me 24/7 ~
Things I HATE:
~PPl who backstab others~
~Ppl who lie to me or hide things from me~
~Ppl who dun mean wad they say~
~Ppl who break promises~
~Ppl who breaks my heart~
~Hao Lian, Guai Lan, Xia Lan Kia~(ppl who r HL,XL,GL u shd noe who u r! stay away form me!)
~Ppl who insult or hurt my love ones!
(if i noe who u r u will get it from me!)~
In the event that i insulted anyone TOO BAD
Cos its ur fault u fall under these category
Rain's 3 rules:
~Thou shall not backstab me or my loved ones~
~Thou shall not lie to me or keep things from me~
~Thou shall not break my heart~
~Whoever break any of this 3 rules... pls dun bother coming back to look for me~
My Motto:
Mother Theresa once said
" People are often unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered;
Forgive them anyway.
If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives;
Be kind anyway.
If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies;
Succeed anyway.
If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you;
Be honest and frank anyway.
What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight;
Build anyway.
If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous;
Be happy anyway.
The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow;
Do good anyway.
Give the world the best you have,
and it may never be enough;
Give the world the best you've got anyway.
You see, in the final analysis,
it is between you and God;
It was never between you and them anyway."
wadeva we do, we should remember that we do it willingly not for other ppl...
so we shd care onli wad we think about our actions...
and not how others think about us...
WHEE!!! HAppy 15th birthday bro =p holy crap! its been 3 years + since the first day we met lol.. wish you happiness in whatever you do =) great health =p good luck in your N's next year =X and well wishes for everything in life XD thanks for all the joy you gave me when we were together, thanks for standing by me all this while and thanks again for all knocks that made me think sensibly =p remember, if you need me i will always be there XP sorry... the game have to wait =p im short of cash haha
26 Nov 2009
YEAH today went smooth... though many things screwed up =) ok i shall tell you my initial plan... get jonathan and his percussion mambers out today... meet at 2pm, go jcube till 4, go vivo watch xmas carol at 6+, dinner, go rooftop, bring the cake out.... things went terribly wrong since last nite... firstly, all his perc members couldnt come, so only left me ryan and noob sis.... so hear it goes... 2pm i came out of train and went to heartland mall to wait for jon... but jon went into the train platform =.= so i went down and find him, he was already on a train to hougang =.= i asked him to come back kovan... den noob sis said she would be late by 30mins... so jon asked me to go to hougang again to eat lunch... so he ate at pepper lunch... sis came 40mins later... (she was late due to some stuff) from 2pm till den me and jon kept crapping alot... from games to saying about some people... den sis came... we suaned her lol... but somehow she kept laughing.. so that means she enjoys being suaned =p took a train to vivo... sis went to find bryan... bryan works in this newurbanmale shop... and guessed wad.. the logo according to sis is a sperm... so she referred to that as sperm shop.. den me and jon were like -_- so while she chatted there me and jon go buy tics... turned out there wasnt any 6pm show.. stupid online booking cheated my feelings =( we found out there was one at plaza sing so we decided to watch there.... still at vivo, jon said he wanted to go challenger... when we entered, there was this xbox360 with mordern warfare 2, jon decided to play... quite alot ppl watching him play wor... den after 3 missions i told him to go le... me sis and jon went to plaza... met up with ryan... ryan was having *tuition* and i din know he can play modern warfare during tuition =.= ok so we went to arcade, ryan wanted to play street fighter 4, too bad got alot ppl, den he played some other game... the way he play damn funny... duno how to use power... anyhow spam the buttons lol... he lost to the boss hahaa.... den jon played on guitar freaks... he failed the second song lol... bought popcorns and went for the movie.. the movie was great... quite funny especially the ghost of xmas present... he kept laughing and made us laugh lol... ohya.... jon keep bully me everytime we watch movie de =/ he hug the popcorn duwan lemme eat!!! LOL but i manage to steal when he wasnt looking MUHAHAHA after show, sis said she hungry... say she want big portion.. i told her to try the bar chor mee... she was like.. u sure big mar? isure finish and still hungry de i said go buy den u know.. in the end she could only finsih half lol... den i made and excuse to go toilet... i ran down to secret recipe to buy a cake haha... choc mud cake... jon kept asking me the price i duwan say.. so he used his bday authority to ask for the price... eee so bad lo... so i told him between 5 to 10 $ ask him slowly guess hahaha den after the cake we go arcade... jon parents came to pick him... den me ryan and sis went home... yeah so overall it was quite smooth =p sry bro for the bad planning =(
25 Nov 2009
well today nth much... spent the whole day watching anime and playing dota... just wondering if im gona spend my hols so aimlessly... haiz... why... why are people always not content with what they have? why do people wana have more... =/ idk why but this question has been hanging on my head today...
i really really miss the old you... i miss the closeness we had... the times when we kept toking to each other... when we could tok about anything... i really feel bad... it hurts... i cant even face you... or tok to you now... even when we meet... i dun even know what to tok about anymore... im afraid... im scared things will get worse... things are already worsening... =(
why... why am i crying over everything...
24 Nov 2009
YEAH MAN! FINALLY! left the last MCQ!!! ok today physics was fine... blahblahblah... well sis had some eye prob... supposed to take her to see the clinic... she oso say very long nev go out le... so yeah... decided to take her to the clinic den go out with her... she wanted to watch paranormal activity... but den again i watched it already... so i said watch 2012 so after my paper i went to her hse... tuned my tartar... she asked if wanted to send jy to work... so i said fine... take 80... on the way to bugis and vivo... went to hgm... bought breakfast.... ahboy called... asked me where i am... i told him im with jy and ql asking if he wan come over... so he ran here... on the bus... we sat at the back... talked and crapped like mad... one woman got very pissed off... and shouted "you think this is a playground?" den someone said "erm... nope? this is a bus?" we started laughing lol jy alighted at bugis... we cont to vivo... damn... lots of memories here... happy but hurtful ones... well bought 3 tics for 2012... suddenly jonathan called.... im really sorry... i thot you watched it twice so i din ask you to come... =( i offered to buy him tics and asked him come... at first he and wei lun wanted to come.. in the end they din come... had lunch at ljs.... den i wanted to go toy R us... omg its damn hilarious... sis kept playing with those baby toys... she kept saying its damn fun... and she nev play b4 =.= so i kept saying she had no childhood hahahah! yeah had lots of fun in there... ok the movie was very nice... but the ending was sort of a "noah's arc" story... which was a bit... well bad twist i would say... and den after that we headed to clarke quay (prononunced as clark key not kueh) had dinner... bah chor mee again =p omg i love mince pork noodles now adays... ok we sat at the river for quite some time... took pics... den went to the clinic... as in not the clinic for sis but "THE CLINIC" well for all those who duno, the clinic is a bar... quite unique, the seats are wheelchair, you drink from a drip like the ones then hang from a stand in hospital, so ya we brought ahboy to have a look around.. took a cab to ahboy hse... den bussed back... its been quite long ive went out haha....
22 Nov 2009
Dear lord... i pray for strength... strength to keep myself up when im down... strength to keep me going everyday... strength to support those in need.... lord i pray for love.... love those that really needed your love... love those that love me... love those that hate me.... love those people i meet in any situation... lord give me peace.... peace with my innerself... peace with people i meet... peace with those who have offended me... lord i pray for hope.... hope when i see darkness... hope in people around me... hope in myself... Amen....
haiz i feel dam sad... seems like the people i meet online care about me much more than those i meet real life... its like whenever i need support... they are always there... and i dun mean just on9 chit chat and stuff... its like even when we meet outside... they still care so much.... they scold me when i dun study for my A's and play games instead... concerned about me when im sick... tok to me whenever i needed someone.... even shared with me the slightest thing... asked them out and they nev say no.... and how bout those i meet in rl... im not saying all of them... but majority do... backstabing... listens to rumours... treat me like fuck... dun even care how i feel.... i have fair loads of experience and examples.... the walls have ears you know... haiz... im just getting disappointed manx.... thkx for all those who continued to stick by me... i appreciate it alot... eugene, qiulin, SAS, jonathan, gideon, joontong ashiqali, melvin low, sia0sia0sin, xmycharbor, rulzdestiny, baybe... and there are stll quite a few more i have failed to mention...
22 Nov 2009
Happy birthday ahboy! haha thkx for being with me whenever i needed someone =p really apprciate your prescnece and care =X yep and your 1 year older le... hope you be more guai from now on ok? haha and yeah i hope our friendship will last forever XD
whee!!! im soooo happy! i bought my new phone! its a LG Chocolate! omg its new in the market, better than the arena i wanted to get in every way... and its even better than the iphone... trust me =p 5mp cam, capacitive touchscreen, high resolution, HD available, TV output, blahblahblah... the only thing is that its quite long haha... but its veryvery thin so yeah its quite ideal haha ^^
20 Nov 2009
oh well finally the long dreaded econs is over... yeah man... can relax le... next week left mcq =p i cant believe i lived thru these whole month haha... thkx all those who stood by me giving me support =p sry ahboy... today supposed to play dota with you de... dad asked me to stop and watch resident evil =/ play with you tmr or something ok? haha.... today after paper met up with rulz jie... she said she wanted to rant lol... seems like im a ranting wall these days lol... its ok peeps... exams are unofficially declared over by ME XD rant all you want =p i will open both ears =X
17 Nov 2009
ok... 4 more papers to go peeps... hang on a bit longer =p
14 Nov 2009
ok today very high... went to church... after that got SALT anniversary yeah! hahaha lots of food... thkx for all those who made them =p lots of entertainment during dinner hahaha... the singers were very funny hahaha yeah felt quite relaxed today =) ohya i still have donuts left in my kitchen XD bought them from donut factory today haha
13 Nov 2009
Happy bday my love... today's your bday rite? haha... i hope life for you is going well...
oh well... today was maths paper 2... im telling you this is the easiest paper in 10 years =.= its like so easier compared to the TYS questions lol anyways 5 papers down.... 6 more to go...
well... many things have been going on in my mind.... damn....
12 Nov 2009
4 papers down... 7 more to do... omg chem was a breeze... i spotted many questions and they came out =p im hoping to do well this paper!!
11 Nov 2009
happy bday to harrold =p
3 papers down... 8 more to go... i hate gp...
10 Nov 2009
oh gawd...ive got a feeling i screwed my maths... i know i did one whole question wrongly... and lots of careless mistakes... omgomgomgomgomg.... tmr is english... i hope things are better... 1 paper down... 10 more to go....
9 Nov 2009
holy moly! tmr first paper of the exam... wish me luck guys =( im like freaking nervous lor =/
pssst: sis says her presence will be with me tmr... so if i feel a tap during the paper tmr... kindly remind me that its just her and theres no need to freak out =p
sis pls hide your prescence properly... cos examiner says posession of unauthorised materials arent allowed in the room... i duwan get caught cos you arent authorised to be there =p
omg sis says shes dying her hair... she say the instuctions says that for hair at shoulder length, apply full bottle... since hers is above shoulder length... i kept scaring her that she will get patches haha!!! i really cant imagine if i see her with one big patch of brown at the top and the rest black HAHAHA!!!
8 Nov 2009
argh! 2 more days to doomsday... i cant wait for the freak A levels to end!!!
5 Nov 2009
OMG! im telling you... parents can be such a nuisance... i think many of you will understand what i mean... its like your doing work the wholeday... den you try to take a break by having a go on your com... then they start nagging at you for not studying... den you tok on the phone for like a couple of minutes... they complain that you arent studying... and they blame you and start nagging for 15mins... and they start saying that your giving them stress when they dun even know that they are the ones giving unneccesary stress to everyone oh fk it.... and the thing about parents always seem to twist words to their own advantage? like they used to say that i shouldnt study so much and take a break every 45mins... and whenever im having that break... they start saying that im never studying... oh wtf... ive had enough of it.... just to affirm... anyone have parents that are different from mine? like the very understanding type and never nags? pls tell me i wana have a head count... probably zero anyways =X
4 Nov 2009
tiring... very tiring... dying of tiredness soon lol
3 Nov 2009
pls refer to pte post for more details ty
2 Nov 2009
ok sry for not updating the last few days... was quite busy the last few days... well more or less im still waiting for the 10 days to past by... unfortunately its like going so slowly... so yeah im indulging into facebook and anime to make time pass quickly... of cos i have to study oso lar... i promised quite alot of ppl that im gona do my best for A's so yeah i will give it my all =) good news... my energy source is restored!! haha... 5kg to 7kg of candies in my fridge now =) got gummy bears, to cadbury to dove to hersheys!!!! *hints at sis and other choco lovers ^^* want mar? hahaha... dun gib you xbleahx i still have the 1kg cadbury bah wo sis.... hahaha dun eye it =p ok thats all for now haha dad back from 2weeks overseas trip... no more fun le... no more late nights =(
30 Oct 2009
omg!!! damn happy today... thkx to sis and sim and ahboy hahaha.... we were having some sort of conference at 10pm... cos long time nev conference le.... den ahboy had to slp.... after that sis suddenly sid some funny things that made me have laughing fits... she said she saw a caucasian jogging... and saw that guy had his dick hanging out from his pants... omg... i really started laughing... she told me her other frends saw it too... den sim started saying about redbull can make things fly... and den duno why got flying sausage and wadever lol... seriously.. i laughed till i became breathless hahaha... and guess what =.= thkx to sis i cant slp last night... lol.... and i kept waking up hahaha....
ok den in the afternoon we met for lunch.... supposedly me sim and sis nia... den ahboy last minute come.... bryan K^5 and clara oso came lol... ok lar today dam funny lor... bryan keep doing a lot of funny things... like breast rotation =.= and stealing sis' shoes... dam funny lar... me and sim sit there watch movie hahaha.... sis chase bryan round and round for that shoe of hers hahaha dam stupid lor... i kept laughing ahboy left after lunch.... ohya den i walk pass one shop and i saw the redbull can... den i kept laughing hahaha after that i went to compass... meeting family for dinner at ajisen... lol...today i like eat alot lor =.=
okok thats all for today =X time to study again...
Tonight... a gloomy night... dark clouds on the horizon.... reminds me of us... in the past... when we were together.... on that same dark cloudy night... but unlike tonight...back then i had you... the thunder and lightning were shielded by you.... that hug of yours turned monsters into dust... that thunderstorm we were in.... felt like an ambience to our relationship... that smell of rain that stood in the air... was the smell of our love.... the soft touch of your embrace... kept me warm in the coldness... the breath of yours... was like the breeze after the storm... and beneath the pale moonlight... was just the two of us... singing our song of rain...
29 Oct 2009
omg super fked up now... fug that asshole living in the next room.... pardon me for being so pissed off now... i have my reasons... i was like using the com for work.. and den he tells me he wana play 2 rounds of dota... i told him fine... after that 2 rounds... he wanted to start a 3rd round... i screamed right in front of his face... ytd it was the same thing... he broke his promise... i told him i wun give in the next time... and right away i gave a hell load of shouting at his face.... you know im like so freaking pissed... and the last time i burst out was during june at one other fker... ive already said... i hate people who break promises to me... so stop being a whore.... now you know why im pissed off with this PR so much?
28 Oct 2009
wakao... im like dying of naggings.... whole day keep nagging... can you just stop comparing me with other ppl? or comparing with an "ideal" child? like im not stressed enuff in my life already! you dun have to add it on! can i just live in peace?
absurd how i think how humans are... they just cant accept ppl for who they are... its always the ideal this ideal that... and they get all fked up just becos of that ideal world they have at the back of their mind... cant they just be glad of what god gave them and stop asking for more?
27 Oct 2009
aiyo... today im like so super lazy... couldnt get up from bed... closed one eye all the way till lunch hahaha... the food woke me up =p den go home.. the eye start to close again... den dinner it opened again lol.... den after that im like all awake hahaha
26 Oct 2009
haiz... 16 more days to maths.... troubling me.... idk if im capable of taking that paper... i think maths and chem should be fine if i dun make any mistakes physics and econs i think CMI lor... lol... idk leh.... i think i should chiong the last 16 days... so peeps... if i reject outings dun blame me >.< im gona start studying wor....
walao... i cant wait for A level to be over... haha... so many things i wana do but i cant!!! like... going K with jie! high pitch songs FTW!!! watching movie with another jie! lets scare each other on horror =) and going on outings with the rest again =p going slacking sessions with the girls... going gaming with the guys XD ohya and going to vegas =p and the chalet thingy!!! omg... so many things... and i cant wait for exams to end!!!
cao giddy... today eng exam still duno your format at 12am? tamade... arent you suppose to be slping early =.= see... arthur more guai than you xbleahx
25 Oct 2009
haiz... im sry for neglecting you for the past year..... i was reading your blog's past post... im sry that i din consider your feelings... all along i assumed that you could stand on your own.... so i din really cared much for you.... ive forgotten that you were one who needed care too.... i know what i write here wun do much.... but pls just let me make up to you...
to my 2 dearest didi starting your O level tmr.... good luck, may god look over you and bring you thru this exams... and jiayou for the next 2 weeks!!! no fair =/ they end on the second day of my A level.... sobs...
"maybe its just me... couldn't you believe? that everything ive said and done wasnt just decieving? the tear in your eye and your calm hard face... makes me wish that i was never brought into this place...."
24 Oct 2009
Y? y r there so much misunderstandings in my life? Im trying my best to always make things clear... but in the end... i always end up running away from things....
Hey i know im not the ideal type of person.... I have my own faults and weaknesses... I know many of you have toked to me about it.... I just feel that im making the biggest blunder in life... For many years... ive kept myself within myself... each time i try to open up.... i just close myself back in... afraid that i would be hurt again...
y am i always the one whos looking at things differently from how others see? its tiring to be diff from others all the time... i reallyreally need someone whos willing and able to unds the way i feel and think...
i know im not a perfect person.... im trying real hard to accomodate everyone into my everyday life... i know sometimes i leftout particular people who are very dear to me... im sry about that.... i know im kinda greedy...reallyreally wish to be with everyone together... frankly i feel that im very cold towards everyone now... its like towards my exams... i reject almost every outings... but i try to keep my warmth towards my loved ones... try to go out with them every once in a while.... i hope you guys unds.... its not that i duwan to go out =/
haiz... i just feel that my life right now is really is like a tangled mess... and im like in the middle... impossible to get out.... exams... parents.... friends....love.... everythings all messed up....
when i said i love you... i meant it... though words speak louder than words... its very awkward for me to prove it thru actions if you are unable to reciprocate it...
23 Oct 2009
oops sry for not blogging the past few days... its been boring.... absolutely boring... but guess what? im like busy studying hahahaha.... and yeah today i went back to school for a mock paper.... i finished the entire 3hr maths paper in 1 and half hr! yeah! and i only left a 6 mark question empty hahaha ok i learnt lots today thkx to my maths tcher =p currently on the phone with ahboy.... gona watch death note on TV with him lata kekeke
lol ahboy so cute... he say wan pei me watch but his aslp now hahhaa cant fault him lar... he today got cca... must be quite tiring haha... and tmr morn he oso got... so ya i duwan him to slp too late oso =p
19 Oct 2009
today leh i went to cut hair with ahboy.... went to mss there cut... cao ahboy... i cut hair halfway... he keep di siaosiao keep tell aunty cut botak for me lol... tamade... anyways today i cut dam short sia.... hahaha... after that leh we went for lunch at compasspoint... ate pizza hut... toked alot of crap.... lol... ya and i brought my GP stuff to study oso.... anyway idk why but i always feel happy whenever im with him haha... he and his happiness aura =p
18 Oct 2009
bad nite... i seriously cant stop missing this person... haiz... why am i still brooding over something that has passed for so long? =(
ok peeps i booked the chalet le.... checkin 30nov checkout 2dec 3D2N bbq is at 1dec those who wana come for bbq/chalet pls call me k? its self invitation =) no call means no come hor! yeah and chalet is at $35 per head bbq is at $5 per head if you come for chalet, price of bbq already included so plsplsplspls call and say hor? if not i assume not going le =X (dun say i nev warn ar) plan has already been drawn out by ahboy... will pass to those going at a later date... currently 5 ppl going : ME<3Ahboy<3Sis<3Liping<<<333Edwin XD additional info will be given at a later date
another bbq will be held at my hse at 5dec for my bday all me frends are invited, 4E1,6D,0808,MSSMB,relatives,family,Gans,frends so yeah if you are listed above pls come ^^ LOL... yeah so please tell me if your coming too ^^ cos i need to estimate the amount of food to buy =X
ohya and im free from 2dec to 7dec n 24dec onwards... so pls book me on a first come first serve basis if you wana hang out with me =p someone pls book me on xmas we go bomb orchard =X booking must be made 1 week in advance! rental of me is $5 per hour! =p late bookings would be charged $5 per day XD and cancelation of bookings must pay $100 surcharge =p LALALALA HAHAHA
17 Oct 2009
To all, especially my dearest bro and sis i wana share this saying with you guys... something that i just rmb... someone once told me.... that everytime we ask a favor from god, the ans may not come as the most direct form... "I ask for happiness, god gave me the steps so that i can climb up to achieve it I ask for friends, he made me lonely so that i will learn to make frends... I ask for wisdom, he taught me how to gain knowledge... I ask for hope, he brought me into darkness so that i can find light... I ask for courage, he made me fear so that i can learn to be brave... I ask for perfectness, he made me imperfect so that i can grow I ask for love, he gave me my loved ones so that i can learn to love" and so my dear frends... to all who are feeling down... pls rmb that god is always with you... its not that he doesnt want to ans your prayers... he has his own ways of answering you =X and rmb he usually loves to do his work in other people... so that both parties will gain from his help XD
16 Oct 2009
hehe today is graduation ceremony day... means after today no more school!!! haha so i have 20 free days b4 my exams start... there was like the principal speech... guest of honor speech.... teachers' rep speech... students' rep speech... ohya they showed some very funny videos the teacher made haha... and the picture memory video was dam touching... yeah den my class took some pics.... den had buffet lunch at the atrium... greedy me ate abit too much... the rest decided to eat at pizza hut... since i ate 3 times in a row... den nvm lor... i went home...
ohya today i ate a slice of cake b4 lunch.... ate two servings of lunch... one more slice of cheese cake at home... and dinner at sushi.... and the result? my stomach is in pain =( dam its super pain... regretted gorging myself =X
15 Oct 2009
Happy bday to clifford bitch!! lol... XD i nev forget your bday ar XD and im sry i forgot your hp number... i duno how send you sms le wor =( that shows how long i din sms you le =( haha... jiayou for your A's!!!
today leh after sch went pizza with ahboy and nick... ate abit den nick zao... in between some fked up things happened... so i went home feeling fked up... den b4 i step pass the security guard below my hse... jonathan called me... ask me go hougang mall find him lol... and guess wad... his at pizza hut too =.= anyways i was still feeling dam pissed.... den i was straing into the blank space.... i realised this guy in front seems dam familiar... lol... took me a min to notice that was clifford!!! hahaha i called him on the hp to turn his direction at me lol... wished him happy bday.. chat a while.... den i went off with jonathan and ryan... walked around hgm and den home...
14 Oct 2009
Does anyone even know what i need? or how i feel? anyone freaking hell knows? no... i doubt anyone knows that.... what i need most is love... love from friends... understanding from friends... care from friends... someone who nev fails to be by my side... someone whom i can tell everything to.... and i thought that i could get that by being close to people... especially guys... i thought that since we are from the same gender... we can understand each other better... but no... im afraid not... ive failed to know that most guys... they just disappoint me... they just dun bother understanding people... they dun love people areound them.... and abv all... they are just selfish... only thinking about themselves... or how others think about them... they nev tried to think about those people around them.... girls? well for some facts they are way much better than guys.... in terms of friendship... the amount of effort they put into each friendship... well... thats all i can say.... if only the guys can be as matured thinking as the girls... and i guess no one knows my true nature at all.... im trying my best to open myself to all... but i guess no ones trying to come to me.... so for 18 years... the whole world was just seeing that mask of mine...
Reflection
Look at me, You may think you see Who I really am, But you'll never know me.
Everyday, it's as if I play A part.
Now I see, If I wear a mask, I can fool the world, but I cannot fool my heart.
Chorus:
Who is that girl I see? Staring straight, Back at me. When will my reflection show Who I am inside?
I am now, In a world Where I have to hide in my heart, and what I believe in.
But somehow, I will show the world what's inside my heart, And be loved for who I am.
Who is that girl I see, staring straight back at me? Why is my reflection someone I don't know?
Must I pretend that I'm someone else for all time. When will my reflection show, who I am inside?
There's a heart that must be free to fly That burns with a need to know the reason why
Why must we all conceal What we think How we feel?
Must there be a secret me I'm forced to hide I won't pretend that I'm someone else for all time.
When will my reflection show who I am inside?
When will my reflection show who I am inside?
13 Oct 2009
OMG!! my internet speed return to normal le!! its been lagging the whole of last month... 1.0mbps dl speed nia... now jump back to 15.0mbps le!! WOOTS!! say buhbye to bufferings and lags on on9 streaming sites!!!
cao giddy didi... u think you funny ar... previous nitecall at 1am... last nite call at 2am... you think you very cute ar =.= still dare say you calling at 3 tonite... im taking no chances... no ones gona spoil my beauty sleep!!! gona off my phone =X
today ended at 12... ahboy say he go play pool with frends... sis baking cookie for jy bday... jie at home sleeping... so i decided to go find jie first lol... took a bus down to aljunied... omg the bridge there i saw a bigbigbig bean!!! the mr.bean's soybean's bean... dam cute!!! decided to eat b4 going up... i looked up and saw... "SIM's vista..." din think there was anything wrong... until sis called... ask me go SIM's hse =.= so i said sry to jie... and bussed back to hougang... met sis and the rest at hgm... sis say wan buy cake... den ahboy ran from his frends to us lol... sry for making you wait at the bus stop lar... anyways... got the cake... and special candles =p went to her hse... sneaked in... we wanted to surprise her... we hid at the smoked-filled-suana-like staircase for her to appear... lit the candles... sadly she wasnt at home =.= blew them off... waited somore... heard the lift sound.. thot she was back.. relit candles... shes not home yet... blew it off... eh you think funny ar? lol... those relighting candles cant be blown off unless you press it with finger leh? called her... she was at bbq pit lol... went down...found out lighter was leeking.. din wan an explosion... so we din light the candles... we thought the whole surprise gone... who knows she got lighter wakakaka... she had a hard time blowing the candles off... laughing at her madly... sis even took the video lol.... sat there chatted a while... went back....
13 Oct 2009
ok idk why im doing these random stuf... oh well....
oh come on sis... dun wry so much in life... just let life go the way its suppose to be... if things arent meant for you.... dun go for them... go for the things that are meant for you... this way you will live happier! ok? jiayou to the last few papers!!!
ahboy ar... thkx for peing me today... yeah... thkx for toking me thru our pizza too... thkx very much...(finally he learnt to pay for himself =) )
hey bro... dun get too much hatred in your life... learn to love... cos by loving thats when we live our life happy... hatred will never bring you happiness... pls rmb that... i just hope that i could guide you thru your life... if your willing... i wana help make you a happy person you once were... so pls... lemme try ok?
kor... finally called me after so long siol... ya la you got A's for your prelims lar =X jiayou for your A level too... dun so bad lar... what no all A's dun tok to me... you think very easy get ar =.=
cao giddy didi... so bad.... call me at 1am last nite... just to ask me about maple?? tamade... heng i off my hp... dam tired last nite.. i din wan any disturbance...
oh well... i dun deny that i miss you alot... yeah... i wun forget that your the one there for me when i really needed someone in the past... the times we toked throughout the nite... the times we went out tgt... and below your hse when i got emo over some people....... i just cant understand why things had to turn out this way... i really do hope that things can turn back the way they are... your quite a nice person actually... yeah and i do miss the old you... ohya forgot to wish you a happy bday too....
11 Oct 2009
why... why are you appearing in my dreams again and again... i know im missing you much... but i know that in reality we will never be together again... this pain is hurting me.... it sux....
haiz... even the first song i hear in the morning... has to be the one we sang together...
10 Oct 2009
I never should have let you go.... I cant forget us... our memories tgt... the good the bad... the places we went... the things we did.... and lastly the things we felt.... I cant forget that scent.... that smile... that shadow... that cry.... Why do people have to disappear without any notice? No last goodbyes... no last hugs.... no last kisses... Just gone....
when i said i would protect you... no matter what happens... i will always be there for you if you need me... even if saving you sends me to heaven...
9 Oct 2009
ok... im really not feeling well now... i think im being hit by some cold spells again... im like feeling so insecure again... that somehow or rather things will change again... im so afraid.... that things will never be the same... i need someone... someone who is able to really understand me...
8 Oct 2009
lol... rulz jie happen to be at serangoon today... so yeah i went to find her again =p
oh my! i just realised its been 10 years since i been to vegas! i kinda miss the grand hotels, mirage, pyramid, CAESAR PALACE!!! omg! i can rmb the starry ceilings in caesars!!! and yeah dad says we will and MUST stay at grand canyon's for the night lol... i cant believe i will get to see the sunset and sunrise there!!
7 Oct 2009
yeah was at hougang mall toay... met rulz jie for the first time haha... she doesnt look like how i imagined her to be lol.... anyways... yeah was slacking off with her for a while...
6 Oct 2009
well today aint much of a studying session compared to ytd... its more like a chitchat session... yeah today only me and bro and nick... we were eating at pizza... cos the student meal was only 590 with free flow of drinks... den yeah just chatted over lunch/dinner... haiish... see lar i tell you to take care le =X now flu le lor =( please take care ok?
haiish... everytime my loved ones get sick... i somehow will oso kena.... some funny connection.... no wonder my head aches the whole morning...
anyway.... did u just come to me only becos you needed help? im not an answering machine....
well to all "risk high fans" who have been foloowing the story.... MS Low said: "I don't care and I have nothing to say." "I'll be graduating in January, then I'll take some time to enjoy life ... Two years later, hopefully Singapore will forget all this and I can step on the stage again. I like to be a shining star, the centre of attraction."
oh what a bitch... you know ive never criticised anyone that much b4... youve done a nice job "risk high"!
5 Oct 2009
oh mine... im like so guai today... did like 40 Chem mcqs, 5 physics questions, 7 maths questions... hehehe... met bro and ahboy after school... suppose to have studying session.... again nick din come... ahboy today so dao luan.... nev study only disturb people lol... nvm lar... but next time wan come rmb bring your books ar!!! ok so we studied till 7+ hahaha fruitful day... so tmr is gona be the same too! happy EOY's hhahaha
4 Oct 2009
Happy bday to my cousin derrick! whee finally 21 siol... hope you enjoyed the taste of pond water and the tau pok =p and yeah your bday cake =.= pooh bear siol... i cant believe your 21 lol... anyway thkx for inviting me to the carlton... haha...im like so tempted to have a quiet 21st liao... duwan so many people =X so scary siol... you heng no flagpole there hahaha....
so funny lor... i eating cake halfway... den they strip him... and carry him to the pond... den when the management wana stop them... they just shouted "kin throw" den bsshhh into the pond... lol! den they pin him on the floor and play stacko =p the pooh bear cake so cute lar... copy me <3 pooh de.... hahhaa.... ok im like so sleepy.... monday blues are cathing me again =( i duwan go school!!!!
4 Oct 2009
So what do you guys think about the "Miss Ris Low" problem that is happening? Read the sunday time today there is new information. I feel that it is like so LOL. Its like two adults fighting over that dumb crown. Its like so childish and typical uncultured-singaporean-like. She just dragged the 1strunnerup down cos she cant get her crown thats all. Did she even understand the meaning of backstabbing? Her friend backstabbed her by reporting to the news? If so wouldnt the news already published it long ago? And from interviews, i can see that she really doesnt deserve the crown. She even talks about her youth problems and stealing. Its like self defamatory. Thats like so dumb. Who would defame themself in front of the public when she herself wants to be famous? Does she even know the rules to observe as a beauty paegent? One has to be elegant and lady-like. Not a cao ahlian type. an eye for an eye? Is she really that immatured? Well i think that if she went to the Miss Universe she would have shamed the country.
these are some feedbacks i read on the internet... "She looks good only on the outside. But when she opens her mouth, its like URGH!" "Ris Low claims to have A1 in her english, Fact or fiction?" "Unbelievable! Miss S'pore World looks good until she opens mouth to speak" "It is unbelievable that she was chosen to represent Singapore in an international competition." "She does have the looks, but it all falls apart when she opens her mouth to speak" "Her English is appalling and her opinions are insignificant." "This is a really embarrassing representation of a Singaporean."
well and i really do agree with them. watch her interviews on youtube. You will understand why. I really dun like defaming or insulting or criticising people... But her actions against the 1strunnerup or as she called, "her friend" is simply ridiculous. Even if she was being backstabbed by that "Frend" does she have to be so childish to backstab back? what noobs. big disgrace. or as the netizens proclaim, Miss "Risk High".
3 Oct 2009
today so tired... had to go to stupid school for chem... just came home...
say yeah to vegas!!! so those who wan me buy pressies back... pls hand me your order form =) dun wry i shall just charge the air ticket cost and service charge 200% hahaha.... neh im just kidding... if got anything you wan me buy just say... i help you buy... who wans mickey mouse? lol... im thinking of just entering disney to buy softies lol.... my dad says im crazy wakakakaka
2 Oct 2009
omg guys! guess what! i did improve xia! My grades are like this... A,B,C,D,E,S,U S and U are failures. English - E (usually a S or U) Maths - S (usually U) Physics - S (usually U) Chem - D (usually S) Econs - U (still U) ok so overall i felt i did better. Chem should have been better. i really made lots of silly mistakes. i haven gone thru physics yet. maths was tough. the whole cohort average was a S and econs is as usual the suckiest =.=
oh yeah. its finalised. im flying to San fransico on 7th. be back on 22nd from Vegas. he cancelled the japan trip. and have to pay 50USD for each person lol... Oh yeah! vegas and off to the casinos! dam i missed the nightlights of vegas!
1 Oct 2009
Happy children's day to all children!! small children big children cute children!! hahha... even nub children (nub sis)... hahaha.... ended school at 1pm today... ahboy ask me go his hse lol... so yeah i go his hse to study... lalalala
30 Sept 2009
Wow i just realised blogging using IE wun lag as much as FF lol... anyways... just a rough ting of today... firstly i was dam f up today... sry to anyone whom i shown any emotions to.... firstly was school.... the results sux... idk wad to say to my parents.... though i got back half of each paper... i know that it must have sucked badly... so yeah i ended at 130... suppose to meet at 3... i wanted to ask bro to meet earlier but i cnt get thru his hp... so i went to hougang to meet ahboy first... den we bussed to kovan to meet bro and ryan... ate mac... starting to study when they wanted to go bro's hse to game... well i was initially pissed when i got pang sehed... yeah i wasnt in a state of thinking this afternoon... sry about that... but yeah i understand his reasons.... anyways i went off home when my train reached hougang... so i ran to mac to check on sis... i knew she was there... *BOO! sis!!* *knocks her head on the wall* *oh my... wad a nub.. lol..* XD i hope i dun get killed by this haha.... so yeah after i went home... i still felt dam down... jumped str8 to the pool... watered for 2 hrs... i heard there was a tremor den... but since i was in the pool i cant feel any seismic activity lol.. back home... doing my work when bro asked me to dota with them.. so yeah i did... and guessed wad? they quarreled again =.= aiyo.... its just a game boys =X dun get upset over whos nub and whos not... i know his an amateur... and wana be pro... but as we all know is char very well... so just give in a bit can? lol... i duwan take sides de hor... wan quarrel leave me out =p ok now im back to studying...
ohyeah.... so now we left you out and duwan pei you train ar? i thot you have your own fixed party with you de? do you even still need us? cos i dun even feel that im needed we will zhi dong call you to party us ar? im so sry lor.... zhi dong dun exist in my dictionary... you wan oso zhi dong come find us wad... you think i go around asking ppl party de ar? is cos we take the intiative to ask each other party de.... u keep wan us ask you to party with us? and den you urself dun even have the intiative to ask us oso? yeah and you say you dun feel bothered anymore cos we keep leave you out? so if you arent bothered why are you complaining much?
29 Sept 2009
ok today i din go to school. had 2 medical appointments... dad fetch me to punggol mrt at 7.... chiong mrt down to boonlay... had my physio... stupid tiring excercises... heng got sis pei me sms through it... den she suddenly bo reply... but heng got jie pei me sms while i shopshop around jurong point... tamade she say she wan get me sex toys for my bday =.= after that i went to hougang plaza... cso ah boy say wan lan... i say i wan go home study... he ask me come a while... so i played 1 hr with them... kotl + 2 vanguard + 1 randiance +1 heart = ownage =p anyways im back at home... freaking stressed... cant even think.... im like so pissed off for no reason =( fk the A's....
oh yeah "pro"? so now you kena ks by ppl den come cry to us lar? ask you if you nid us help ks back. you act pro say no nid our help. now nobody help you complain say no one help you? please go use your brains to think before complaining can mar? i thot your lev very high very big? everything can settle yourself dunit us de mar? its just funny that wadever you say out to one person contradicts what you say to another.
28 Sept 2009
aiyo... today very tiring... woke up at 10+.... went to school for my last paper at 12... den i forget bring my wallet... run back home take... den i realise din off the switch and stuff.. took so long to just set off lol... and den today suppose to meet nicholas and my 2 bros to study de... but den stupid chem department make us stay back... so i tell them to like meet another day or something... den after my lesson.... my 2 bros at houngang mall eating pepper lunch lol... just nice sis at mac eating oso... so i nicenice go find them =p yeah im nice ok! haha.... den my 2 bros keep disturbing me lor.. tamade XD den sis come down pepper lunch oso nev help me... join in their jokes oso RAWR!!! yalor some people rich siol... $700 bass nia... duno who lor....=X oh yeah im craving for a new flute lei... my old one spoil very long... im temporary fixing my old flute with tape and super glue lol.... i know it wun last any longer... so here is my new flute!!! 19.5k Rose Gold Flute, 14k Rose Gold Mechanism US$35,760.00 nia hor bro? hehehe... and theres a note below... Please Note: The price shown below is only for the body of this flute. Please build and price your headjoint separately. =.= Complete your purchase with... 19.5k Rose Gold Headjoint Price $6,800.00 ^^woots will you look at this? just the head is 6.8k liao... bro very cheap hor? lol....
27 Sept 2009
new note... i have tweeter on my blog now.... click on the third page... the one that says archives....
nub sis!!! dun call me nub ar!! only i can call you nub wakakakkaa.... dam it... i should have asked liping to bbq your butt ytd.... =.= you smsed me at 2am in the morning... zai hor? i sleep till so shiok suddenly phone vibrate =.= i should have switch off my phone... bugger hahaha.... 2am in morning ask me about contact lens... you think you very cute haha lol...
today i woke up like a zombie... thanks to her (the nub sis above)... HAHAHA ok im just kidding.... my parents woke me up.... and i was like... oh gosh why'd you wake me up so early... den i woke up and rmb i couldnt get my new phone last night... so i got bored... lol...
i still wished i could go to america.... or somewhere nice to shop... no return ticket nvm... i shall camp at louis backyard over the new year =p haha... ok im just kidding... i duwan to be a frozen pig at the back of his house... oh wait... LA wun go below 10 degree celsius right? so i wun freeze!! yeah!! hahaa... ok i guess im flying off to japan bah... this time round i wun let anyone stop me from shipping a whole load of anime stuff back!!! the last dec trip i so wanted to by the allen walker from d.gray man!!! maybe i can detour back to buy it hehehe.... well... and guys pls remember to give me your order forms for what you want in japan! cos i really duno what to buy back for you guys =.=
to all... wana have a bbq session at my hse? i opening a bbq at 5 dec for my 18th bday... so yeah all are invited.. please tell me if your coming or not ASAP k?
to all 4E1 classmates of mine... PLEASE COME!!! i miss all of you lol... very long nev meet out le... so all must come hor!!!
lastly to my dearests... our beach resort chalet is on 30th nov to 2nd dec... please pass me $30 ASAP... my mum wana see all the money collected before booking... $30 include the chalet for 3D2N and the bbq food and stuff... if need more for bbq i will collect lata... if theres extra money we will use it for snacks and beverages=p
cheers to all examinees....
26 Sept 2009
omg my dad say america no tickets for return trip.... so i guess im off to japan too =p sad cant go on shopping spree... on the bright side! im off to japan! yeah!! exotic food here i come !!! and im hoping that me can meet bro in japan oso =X but well japan is big... i doubt its possible haha....
the key to survive a long and close frendship is trust. if you dun trust your frends. i dun even seem to know why you call them frends at all.
we dun even know whats goin on in your head. as you already said b4. no one is perfect. i agree friends arent perfect too. we arent even blaming anyone for the situation now. we just wish that this crapped up case blows off soon. no one is in the mood to care for a fight during exams period you know.
views are how people feel about something. i dun unds why you have to get worked up over something. they said something honest and wana see a change. if you choose to think otherwise den thats not our prob anymore. if you cant even take your friends honest view i wonder how you take criticism.
26 Sept 2009
Today seems quite peaceful.... or maybe its that nth interesting happening to me now... haha... quite bored at home... anyone free? lets go out next monday? TO STUDY!!! lol... yeah i think we should meet out to study... since everyone is having exams soon... anyone interested for group study? please contact me...
TAMADE!!! supposed to get my new phone tonight!!! sobs... suppose to pay 100 dollars to break my dad's 2 year contract... den use his 100$ voucher to cover the 100$... guess what? cos he bought the iphone previously, he had to pay 300$ instead of 100$ if he want to break it... sad... had to wait for another line to end lor... nearest one in nov... so i have to wait... sux lar... im stuck with a lao kok kok phone...
i think my parents are set on the america trip... oh yeah and i can have my last minute xmas shopping too!!! cheers to LA and san fransico =p
25 Sept 2009
oh crap... i so feel dam useless.... that i had to drag you into every fked up quarrel... when u arent even involved in the place... sowree =( thkx for helping time and again <3
had physics in the morning... oh yes it sux... i couldnt finish the paper... left the semi conductor question out... after ohysics leh... went with 0809 people... they are a sick and sadistic bunch lol... well but at least they are fun than those from my class... they headed to an empty classroom... and played poker cards... its no ordinary game i tell u... its extra ordinary.... and i mean it... its like playing poker cards.... but the loser has to get "nipplelised" (thats what they call it lol) so u bet the number of times you get pinched at your tits... and the winner is allowed to pinch everyone the number of times they bet... its a sick game... lol... din joined... but i couldnt help laughing at their faces... so yeah i was doing my own work but they created such a din... after 2 hours or so... went to junction 8.... lunched at long john's... sat the subway back.... instead of alighting at the station, we sat to the end and back again lol... cos we had 5 hours between papers... =) and theres nth much for us to do lol... anyway chem was fine... (i hope) now im back and taking a well deserved break...
24 Sept 2009
why do i always feel this strange emptiness in me? this funny tingling feelings.... the feeling of being alone.... being unloved and uncared for.... the feeling that theres no one out there whos willing to understand me?
23 Sept 2009
if i dun rmb wrongly... today is jolin jie bday rite? haiz jie i miss you alot =X
today chem was smooth going.... just that i made a stupid thing this morn... i arrived in school at 730... thinking i had lots of time i went to find a table and sleep... guess what.... i woke up at 8am.... thinking my paper is at 830.... so i went to the library... when i rmb my paper at 8am... so i ran to the hall.... lucky i was late for 5 mins and managed to finish the paper hahaha....
22 Sept 2009
ah 8 more hours to maths exam lol... new phone!!! wait... im thinking of getting the arena instead of the joy... cos arena got capasitive touch screen... joy is the resistive one!! arena got flash camera!!! arena got 8gb internal memory while joy only 200mb!! and... arena got 3.5mm audio jet!!! hahahas... who cares about the windows mobile or gps on joy=.= well actually if arena got window mobile and gps... its perfect!
ok today had maths... pure maths was a total disaster... stats surprisingly was easy...
anyways went to heartland mall again... cao tweet... always disturb me lor...
21 Sept 2009
Oh my.... its been so long since i gone out... and i can say that its been so long since im so happy... well firstly nick asked me out to study... but he couldnt make it =.= so left me and tweet.... so we met at hougang green at 1245... supposedly to study at ljs... but we realised ljs closed.... so did pizza hut and any other restaraunts =.= (argh i cant seem to remember how to spell resaurunt oh wadever...) anyways we bussed to kovan, and ate pizza hut... i ordered turkey bacon carbonara... tweet ordered his chicken linguine... den we studied there and crapped alot... and well as usual he durtied the table very much =) kept making me laugh at his crap lol... den we walked at heartland mall for a while... firstly to the vcd shop... yeah we just walked about looking for horror movies lol.. we came out epmty handed... den went to this kiddy store that sells soft toys... oh my god... there was a puddy cat and tweety bird!! so yeah i bought a tweety bird and he bought a puddy cat... and we exchanged our gifts =p our friends forever exchange token haha... yeah we took a picture too... shall upload them soon... cos my lousy phone no camera... the picture with tweet... den we went to this christian shop... we looked around for stuff... den walked to the mobile shop... oh my there was this offer... i was eyeing for the LG joy... its only 98 dollars for my premium 700 plan wor... so yeah maybe im gona get that... haha... windows mobile + GPS + 5megapixel camera + wifi much better than my current phone lol... den we went to comics connection to look for his love hina manga.... so yeah.. den we found a new place to study wor... the TRAIN!!! haha... dam cool =p studied there... quiet, air-conditioned and peaceful haha... and there wasnt anyone to chase us out unlike the fastfood restraunts... so yeah we stuck to there... den at 6, he went to his ahma hse... i went to compasspoint to eat dinner.... and now im home!!
ohyeah probably some are asking how i blogged without internet connection... well i was in a hurry to check my work online... mum was busy using facebook she din wan me to disturb her... so she gave me the adapter XD
ohyeah there is this new song i found... well actually i found it somewhere... forgive me for taking from your side =X =/ yeah this song is quite sad for me... i really cant forget your face... your touch... your smile... your voice... and i still rmb the first time i met you... i rmb being that innocent kid trying to glance for you every morning... the things we did for each other... yeah... i cant and will never forget that...
Two is Better Than One
I remember what you wore on the first day You came into my life And I thought hey You know this could be something 'Cause everything you do and words you say You know that it all takes my breath away And now I'm left with nothing
'Cause maybe it's true, that I can't live without you Well maybe two is better than one There's so much time, to figure out the rest of my life And you've already got me coming undone And I'm thinking two, is better than one
I remember every look upon your face, The way you roll your eyes, the way you taste You make it hard for breathing 'Cause when I close my eyes and drift away I think of you and everythings okay And finally now, we're leaving
And maybe it's true, that I can't live without you Well maybe two is better than one There's so much time, to figure out the rest of my life And you've already got me coming undone And I'm thinking two, is better than one
Yeah, yeah
I remember what you wore on the first day You came into my life And I thought hey
Maybe it's true, that I can't live without you Maybe two is better than one There's so much time, to figure out the rest of my life And you've already got me coming undone And I'm thinking
Oooh I can't live without you 'Cause baby two is better than one There's so much time, to figure out the rest of my life And I've figured out with all that's said and done Two, is better than one
Two is better than one
19 Sept 2009
To my dearest bro, I know that life can be hard at times. To us, life is always unfair. We keep asking ourselves why does the world treat us so unfairly? Why isit that some people lead such a successful life and a happy life but we cannot? But have we looked at the world from a different perspective? Happiness, i agree is difficult to achieve. especially in a world so full of hatred and selfishness. Actually happiness depends on how we define it. As for me, as long as i can be with my loved ones and they are happy, i will be contented. Though simpleminded, i chose to define it this way so that life will not be as miserable as it seems. Yes parents can be a headache at times. I fully understand that. as you can see i always complain about them as well. But everytime we rant about the bad sides of them, have we ever thought about the happy times we had together? The outings and celebrations you had? It just seems that they arent understanding are they? But no, i beg to differ. Lets just say that they are trying to be understanding but not that understanding enough for us. But before we complain about them, have we ever thought about the people whom may feel more unfair than us? The people who have never known their parents? The people who live every minute in fear? Compared to them, our life seem easier to get thru isnt it? So my dear friend, please try to see life from a different view and dun give up so easily =p
Well you may say that i don't understand you. Yes i cant say i know your life inside out. But i want to try to understand you. so please give me the chance. Because my life and yours arent very different afterall. Like you, i have been hurt and feel that no one understands me or love me at all. MAybe its because we reject others. Why do we feel lonely sometimes? Have you ever felt so hurt by someone you decided never to forgive them? Have you felt you couldnt trust anyone anymore? not even your closest frend? Well maybe it is because we have been so hurt that we dun feel like being hurt again. Thats why we become more cautious and hide from those we trust, in fear of being hurt by them as well? Have you thought of forgiving those who hurt us? Well i have thought about it. Forgive those whom have hurt us though it seems difficult. But by forgiving them, we can give our frendship a second chance. A frendship which we may have held for a long time. By rejecting them, by not allowing frends close to us, that is why we may feel uncared for. Frends may hurt us intentionally or not, but dun forget that true frends will always be with us when we need them. It may sound absurd but why not give it a try? trust me, i have changed quite alot ever since i tried.
Lastly, it is about rejecting the differences of others. We are all humans. We arent perfect, we may be similar of may be very different. But we should respect and accept each others differences. There aint such thing as an ideal frend. So what if someone may be so different they stand out? must we reject and outcast them? I understand their situation for i have felt leftout before. That is why everytime we go for outings, i asked you guys to bring him along. yes i agree he maybe irritating at times and want attention. But learn to accept him or tolerate him more. believe me, he will change soon, once he feels more accepted.
This my frend is some of the life experiences i would like to share with you during one of the most downward poart of your life. as i have said before, life is like a rollercoaster. Treasure those people and things during the most beautiful moments in your life. for you need them to get through the darkest times. And my dear frend, like someone always say to me, "Giving up on life is much harder than to give in" please remember that i will always be there for you if you need me.
18 Sept 2009
ok nth much today... felt bored.... so took a bus down to changi... lol... i thot only 15mins... turned out to be 45 mins =X ate dinner there.... i think i over ordered lol... 4 appetisers... 1 main course 1 8-scoops icecream... lol $95... XD quite a busy day for me lol... duno why today so many people keep calling me hahaha....
well anyways i just wana say im very disappointed with someone right now. i shant say who. firstly, maple is just a dumb game. maple problem settle in maple, dunit drag to real life de. one supid game nia you also kpkb. im only trying to solve problems for you, tell me if you dunit help. i shant even bother at all. i try to help, you start screaming at me for caring. fine now im not gona bother, den why are you complaining to people about what i have done? eh? im care about people but not you? it is you who reject my help in the first place. and when i say im not gona bother, i mean it. duno if real life got such prob u will do wad. pls lar, stop and think before having a bitch fit. your lev high so wad? high big mare? dmg like fk still wan go ffa people. fine lar since you think im being an extra, sua lor, your daiji ownself settle. dun ever come crying to people say no one help you. like you always do. people wan help you reject, of cos no one wan help lar. now i know why your buddylist keep say bout your attitude le. as your real life frend, i wana say. dun take my presence for granted.
17 Sept 2009
oh dang.... physics wasnt so good... wasnt so bad either lol... after school, sss ask me to meet him lol... he doesnt look nor sound like paikia xia lol... and his quite caring too =D anyway i went over to chat awhile b4 going home hahas... ok and i was watching this show called nobody knows. its a jap show... not bad =p the ending was sad though =( but the main actor dam cute =p thats all for today haha... tmr no paper =X
16 Sept 2009
thkx jie and sis for letting me rant last nite... well... today chem was fine... heng nev come out those question i blur de... but well though i think its fine... there were lots of careless mistakes... hope it went fine.... tmr physics... hope no funny questions appear =p
15 Sept 2009
i just cant understand whats on the minds of parents nowadays. they just break their promise and expect us to keep ours? thats absolute crap. first they promised to let me use the phone during my breaks. i kept to it. but everytime i call they still complain much. they said i could use the com at night, but why isit that everytime i just hog for 5 mins and they start complaining? its not as if i din study at all? and they keep complaining that i din study although i did. why cant parents be more understanding? and just stop caring for grades for just once? haven i proved that i can do it for my psle? and my o levels? or maybe i overdid it thats why their expectations are so high. this world is just so greedy. you get what you want but yet they expect more. go ahead take the com. i dun care. since you choose to break your promises. i dun think i should keep mine either.
first mag, den studies. den friends now parents. fml be prepared to see me in IMH anytime. its sooner or later i'll just go nuts.
14 Sept 2009
They say that time heals most wounds... thats if you allow it to... and what if i say most of mine are those that cant be healed? why is it always that everytime someone close hurt me... it leaves the deepest depression in my memory.... and the biggest scar on my heart....
14 Sept 2009
econs paper today... wonder hows it gona be.... good luck to all those having exams too =p
finished my econs. the paper just suck lol.... as i predicted... market failure and policy tools came out.. wheee i just studied both chapters nia lol... the case study is plain wierd lol...
tmr is maths... hope i can rmb my formulas =p
13 Sept 2009
Happy birthday kor!!!! <3 hope your exam goes well and that your fine haha..... love and miss eeu alotalotalot!!!
hmm... kays... now we're toking..... LAS VEGAS AND LOS ANGELES!!!! omg i cant wait to go there le... the thought of uncontrolable swiping of cards... is simply IRRISISTABLE!! well... my parents say the australia trip very ex... they say might as well go US... price oso same... YIPEE!!! i cant resist the temptaion of shopping again hahaha!!! the trip not confirmed though.... will give you the confirmed details soon =)
12 Sept 2009
ok here i am back to the the parents issue again... how many of you experience the same thing? nowadays i feel that parents really cant be trusted with their words anymore. firstly they said "i dun compare you with other people" and soon their next sentence are "look at your classmates...." den they said " i trust you...." and they go "i dun know whether you are really studying or not....." oh please can you stop eating up your own words? i had enuff of such things for once. and now you say its my fault again? for making everyone irritated? well let me tell you. i wouldnt have bothered to study if im not interested. so STOP asking me the same question over and over if im interested in STUDYING OR NOT! you said i had no goals or motives in life? now let me tell you. i do have and know what i want. but it is you who just spoils everything!
10 Sept 2009
ok that was the last straw. im so pissed off now. whats with parents now adays? my msn just pop out cos got ppl find me. i reply one time can die ar? you expect me to dao ppl isit? oso not i wan find ppl rite? so its my fault lar? last time i tok on phone 24 hr. now cos of exam i got few days nev tok le. today ppl call me a bit you complain till like i tok whole day laidat. when they just call 5 mins. the more you nag the more fan i get ok. you say things make me feel better i dun mind. you nag and nag and try to demoralize me. you know how pissed i feel mar? at home you nag, go out you nag. in car you nag, walk oso nag.
crapped up world. FML...
9 Sept 2009
to my dearests.... yesterday is history.... tomorrow is a mystery and a blessing... today is a gift... thats why today is called the present =p so please treasure what you hvae today... forget about yesterday... and dun brood over tomorrow =)
8 Sept 2009
OMG!! hapy bday giddy didi!!! hahaha... woah its been like 4 years since we first met? that so long! well haha... thkx for being by my side... (though your a jerk at time shaha) hope that our frendship can last forever =p take care and jiayou for your O levels!!! <3
haiish.. i just wish that i can be treated nicely... like a normal person.... not an atm machine nor someone to be ranted at.... i really got not enuff money for my whole week le... how to lend xia.... and im always there for everyone de.... dun say that im there for others but not you.... haiz....i just wish there is someone out there who can understand me....
haiz... ok im sry bro about this afternoon thingy... not the best of times to handle any jokes... really couldnt take it lor... think too stressed... really sry...
7 Sept 2009
ok i reieved this email and i would like to share with all....
"The best kind of friend is the kind you can sit on a porch and swing with, never say a word, and then walk away feeling like it was the best conversation you've ever had ."
"It's true that we don't know what we've got until we lose it, but it's also true that we don't know what we've been missing until it arrives."
"Giving someone all your love is never an assurance that they'll love you back! Don't expect love in return; just wait for it to grow in their heart but if it doesn't, be content it grew in yours. It takes only a minute to get a crush on someone, an hour to like someone, and a day to love someone, but it takes a lifetime to forget someone."
"Don't go for looks; they can deceive. Don't go for wealth; even that fades away. Go for someone who makes you smile because it takes only a smile to make a dark day seem bright. Find the one that makes your heart smile."
"May you have enough happiness to make you sweet, enough trials to make you strong, enough sorrow to keep you human, enough hope to make you happy."
"The happiest of people don't necessarily have the best of everything; they just make the most of everything that comes along their way."
"Happiness lies for those who cry, those who hurt, those who have searched, and those who have tried, for only they can appreciate the importance of people who have touched their lives."
"When you were born, you were crying and everyone around you was smiling. Live your life so that when you die, you're the one who is smiling and everyone around you is crying."
really beautiful quotes... hopes these can help you guys =p
7 Sept 2009
oh gawd.... i cant believe that ppl are still taking me for granted.... its just a stupid dumb game and they get pissed over a game? lets see the story..... firstly i lent my char to quite a number of people.... now that i changed the password... and i din wana give them the passwords... 2 of them started to give me attitude.... hey... in the first place that char is mine.... i have the right to deny people the passwords... who are you to complain about it? secondly you never did anything good for my char at all... why should i lend it to you? so does that give you the right to hurl vulgarities over? i asked for your password too... you dun even trust me with your password lar... and you think i should trust you with mine? quite dumb....
anyways... my relatives are tokin about going on hols tgt.. gona visit my relatives at perth... and den go up to the great barrier reef.... sounds nice =p but its 2 weeks... gona miss quite alot of ppl...
eh bro... dun get fed up over small things. chill.... stay cool like you always do =p like this dumb game of mine... its just a game... so i dun get fed up over it.... so what if the class goes against you? take it as a time to trust and treasure those who are by your side...
6 Sept 2009
today leh went to my dad's side ahma hse.... my cousin got her first class honours so she treat us eat KFC and pizza... chat alot there.... den back home.. den slp....
5 Sept 2009
not much stuff today lar.... had terrible diarrheoa.... aiyo.... den today cousin bday... just nice he stay below me nia... so after church i went below bbq pit lor.... drank some red wine.... eat abit.... den went up his hse... watching cinderella story with my cousin's sis... which is my cousin oso lar.... lol.... den thats all for today lor...
5 Sept 2009
oh my allah! its like september already? lol... kinda surprised... time goes so quickly... so many people bday coming lor... duno why most of my family de bday all end of the year de... damit... totally too stressed to even plan all the things lar... i usually plan things 1 year before hand de... and i make things 1 year b4 hand.... this year is so screwed! i dun even have any ideas lar.... any suggestions peeps?
4 Sept 2009
lets see... today was my first prelim paper... general paper(english).... ok lar... think manageable... though many people cant complete it... den i stayed back for consultations... reached home. rulz jie told me she 120 le lol... so i helped her do her 4th job skills... lalala... do till now lor....
"If its a hero you want i can save....just stay here... your whispers are priceless your breath it is dear so please stay here...."
"I must be crazy now Maybe I dream too much But when I think of you I long to feel your touch
To whisper in your ear Words that are old as time Words only you would hear If only you were mine
I wish I could go back to the very first day I saw you Should've made my move when you looked in my eyes 'cause by now I know that you'd feel the way that I do And I'd whisper these words as you'd lie here by my side
I love you, please say You love me too, these three words They could change our lives forever And I promise you that we will always be together Till the end of time"
2 Sept 2009
=( getting even more stressed as the days go by... ive got a feeling everything is going all wrong... i cant help but feel this way.... haiz... can anyone out there tell me wads wrong with me?
1 Sept 2009
hehe new month open very nice.... den it when dam suck.... haiz... sry peeps... im not me today again....... first sorry for being late =X ahgong suddenly appear in my hse with breakfast... cant reject it mar lol... den the mrt i waited 6mins was a non-service one... need to wait one more lor... so im like super late... wadever happened today... i dun wana post... whoever wan know just ask me directly bah... think i had pms today.. suddenly i got pissed and irritated... den suddenly happy... den suddenly sad... idk lar... anyway thkx bro for organising today de... helped me alot =p
31 Aug 2009
cont'd from previous post...
hey bro... i know i may have hurt you b4... but i wana win your trust back.. thats the reason ive been trying so hard to be with you again... the purpose of being all close to you again... it just gives me a sense of purpose in life... to care for those i love.... to be with those i love... and to love those i love... ive have no ulterior motives behind anything... nor do i treat you as a substitute... in fact i do have lots of friends now... but the reason why i chose to stick with you.. is because i felt that theres a need to love you.... my love for you is a love beyond anything.... i just want you to feel loved... and to feel happy in your life... though i have made some mistakes in the past, im willing to learn and pick myself up again... i hope that you will remain happy always =/
today went to school for teachers day celebration... met sis after that.... had breakfast at mac with her and K^5(king kong kong kah kiao) walked, sang, slacked, crapped... went to mss too... saw the teachers.... crapped with my ex-classmates met with giddy.... lent him my jacket.... saw ahboy... OMA! he had a bad cut on his chin.... ran all the way to 7-11 to get him some handiplast... si ahboy... nev take care yourself ar! den went with sis and K^5 and clara to compasspoint.... den i went home.... simple today =p
31 Aug 2009
hey bro... i know your feeling down.... i know your feeling frustrated about your life... im sry i cant do much to help you... but all i can say is that i will always be there if you need me... you can trust me with anything... im sorry for hurting you... and i know that deep down in your heart you still cant forgive me... but i dun like to see that your always hurt by things and other people... and whenever you need someone... no ones there for you... haiz.... you know how useless i feel everythime i cant help you out? i know your longing for love... someone to care for you.. someone whom you can trust... but if you dun let your heart out to us... we really cant do much... as i have said before, i really love you alot... as a frend... as a brother... i hope that you can reciprocate back... and what i want to say is that... i want to help you in your life... i want to make it better... its whether you allow me to do that or not... bro try to look things from a different perspective... dun keep seeing things so pessimistically... life aint so bad... if i can cope with it, so can you.... moreover you still have me and your other frends who are supporting you... i know ive lots more to say... i wish i could tell you everything i know about life.... i just want to let you know that i will always be there for you... if you need me =)
29 Aug 2009
oma... cant wait for today haha... its been a long time since i hanged out with the usual peeps... yeye.... gona go out with them today and get high! been having lots of stress now... really nid them beside me to distress haha... well im not sure what they are gona do... ahboy told me its 3hr lan before going for movie.. oh well... anything bah.... maybe i can catch the x2 exp today haha...
omg today dam fun! and im dam tired just reached home so we met at kovan mrt at 1+ had lunch at pizza hut.... jonathan and me was there first... tweet came lata.... den dk suppose to meet at 2pm came early.. ryan ate lunch at home den come find us... stupid ryan... he keep di siao dk... he go take the cheese from the pizza and try to stuff it into dk's straw lol! den nick got tuition so he caught up at 6pm.... we had 3 hr of camping at jcube... started of with spamming rlz jie and her dar from 3 to 4... sry jie i prmised 2 to 4... but the pizza so late... den after 4 they wanted to dota and killning floor... dota was me and jonathan versus ryan and dk... omg ryan is a nub.... but dk covered him up... i think i totally lost touch in shadow shaman lar... last time i cast ward and trap him with just voodoo... now eul scepter le still cant ward him properly... sux.... killing floor is nice... dam fun... but kinda boring cos the zombies are nub compared to l4d... haha... super nice... ya and stupid tweet... he keep spraying flame thrower at zombie... den we keep kena cos he anyhow spray lor...ZZZ 6pm nick came, we went to arcade... 7pm went to cinema... lol the show dam funny!!! hahahaha.... watched where got ghost(local movie) nice laugh haha. show ended at 9pm, walked one round to find fod cos dk is halal..... in the end tweet nid go home... ZZ so me nick and tweet went to eat dinner at tweet hse there... den took a train back... on the way home nick alighted.. surprised parents din call me today wor... i was anticipating his calls but it was giddy didi keep spam me today lol... sianz... tada thats all for today =p
28 Aug 2009
oh well.... nth much today... just that i had dinner at jacks place... the steak was awesome... but its too bloody... i asked them to cook it more well... den guess wad? they replaced my sides as well! lol!!
27 Aug 2009
today ar i very guai wor.. listen in all the classes.... go bring and do hw too haha... and i was watching 200 pounds beauty today.. omg dam sad... den tears start flowing aww.... the songs are very nice wor.... haha...go watch ar very nice =p and cute didi called me during lessons.... so sweet =X he say wan pei me toktok wor haha
went to swim thought can distress... after swim became worse... some guy bo dai bo ji wan quarrel with me lor... say wad he trader 1 day 100m... i tell him i spam bbs 1 day 200m.. he dun believe... say pots so ex... i told him bbs 1 hr 100mmr nia... use 1m earn 20m he dun believe... say where got 1 gene 1 eq... i told him 1 gene 4 eq oso got... den he say he wan trade 5 years buy my hse down.. ZZ no life lor 5 years where got maple. he say how i predict.. i said u tell me any mmorpg last 10years lor... he tell me dotaZZZ dota is a frekaing map. WC3 only 10+years dota only 7 lor and dota not = wc3 wad a nub.. den he start saying maple global is first to open... i said kms first he dun even believe.... he kept insisting lar... till i shoot him with the exact dates... kms 2003 gms 2005.. den he logout... i find that ppl nowadays like to argue for nth lor... no basis no stats no evidence wan tok so much... den my bl all ask me jio him play KS.... cos all my BL mostly 15X abv de... ZZZ today just not my good mood day lar.. too bad he stepped on my tail...
26 Aug 2009
woke up with a blur... ahgong drove me to compasspoint mrt.. took train to jurong.. suppose to change train at outram park... i first saw dhoby ghaut... next moment i was at harbourfont, the end of the line... guess i dozed off lol... so yeah i took the reverse train back... the ride was long... from outram to jurong was kinda tiry.. no seats and had to stand for 45mins... went to the clinic... dam i cant stand that nurse attitude... she stared at me when i went to the counter... passed her the appointment card.... she threw it across to her colleague and ask her to do it... wad a bitch... anyway, the physio went out fine... think the only complains i had was the money... imagine paying 50 bucks... 12$ for chatting with me... 7$ for putting a hot blanket over my back... 14$ for making me do stretching exercise and some gym training and the stationary bikes? i think i would pay just the 12$ for chatting and do the rest on my own =.= anyways... i din go to school today... yung wai didi sms me say his hse no electricity lol... suppose to spam him de lor.... anyway.... jcube has replaced pcbunk and is operational.... $2 per hour even on school hols.. open from 9.30am to 1130pm pre paid packages are cheaper of cos... avrg $1.50 per hour for that... and the coms are not bad.... importing alienware soon.... hehehe.. so guys if u all free next weekend go down wor... got official opening =p stupid uncle... u better treat me hor.. i help u promote de wakakkka...
25 Aug 2009
today ar... nth much... preety much studying whole day... tmr not going sch again... going physio...
24 Aug 2009
omg today got maths test. 4hr.... dam im screwed... i just finished all i could and left. din bother to stay till times up. thkx jie for peing me sms thruout lol...
omg im so happy! whee!! i din know that someone misses me xia... cookie boy called today.. he ask me why so long nev sms or call him le =p hehehe... i know im being missed =p lalallala so crapy today... kept crapping and lame-ing.. lol...
23 Aug 2009
much ranting to have about.. its on my personal blog... whoever wana see pls ask me for link...
wah seriously crap... cant take it anymore lar... cheese pie... omg. i dun even know whats wrong with my mum these few days. its like she started screaming for no apparent reason. my finger move abit nia. she suspect i playing games on my laptop? i asked my ahdi what time he start sch on wed nia. she scream and say i meeting with people. OMA. i dun even know whats she up to now lar.
22 Aug 2009
zz... i bought a cheap earring in maple... saw a scrolled one for 4m i buy... dam cheap xia...
oh i find it super ridiculous. my hand moved = i playing com? so when i use com im supposed to stare at the same screen? and i cant click or type? its so unreasonable.
21 Aug 2009
whew.. laogong was fine... nth happen... thk god... anyway today nth much... i learnt how to switch on the gas stove lol... took 5 mins to figure out how to do that... took 30mins to learn how to cook maggiemee lol.. stupid cute didi... he was on the phone with me... kept saying me very pathetic keep suan me dam u!!!
20 Aug 2009
haiz dam scared.... jie lor... ytd tio hack... den she jio hacker 1 on 1.... i dam scared something happen xia!!! jie dun crazy do anything ar... i still wan you do =X
so today lessons ended at 1300..... den ya....
omg... double headache... jie just ended her fight with the hacker.... the hacker ended up very jialat with a nosebless.... jie zai xia.. lol... so hiong... the hacker even give her money sommore siol... propro.... haiz... after jie ended her fight.... laogong kens daiji... he bo dai bo ji say bored den go toilet smoke... den tio caught by DM wtH!! laogong dun scare me xia! suddenly call me say you wan jump! you dun crazy can mar? i still need you de leh!!! i treat you as a dam good frend... u better not disappont me... dar... wadever happens... theres still me k? parents kick you out of hse u can always stay at my here de =p my bed maybe small but cozy mar =p haha... dun wry lar nth will happen to you de... my frend say the most is kena fine nia.... and worseworse is suspended from sch.... even if your parents hit you just ren ok? =( though it hurts me to see you kena laidat.... hope thru this lesson you may kick your smokin habit... and well.... next time dun scare me can? when you said you wana jump i was like crying le lor... tamade...... jie + laogong = i can jump building le lol...! two blows in one day =p last nite cos of jie cant slp... think tonite i oso cant slp le... cao maggy...
19 Aug 2009
woah today super headache... bo bian nid go home... so took early leave.... aiyo head dam pain....
18 Aug 2009
oh today got a long break again... CT we were asked to write or draw any reflections of JC life(good points).. i gave back a plain paper... so u know wad i meant.. theres nth good about NYJC lol.. and den the common lunch break i ate outside... den i watched 200 pounds beauty in the library... its so long since i watched a VCD quality show... seriously very bad compared to DVDs... but the show was dam nice... dam hilarious lar... the way she fell thru the stage because she was too heavy... mind you... its not fell off but fell thru the stage.. one big hole at the centre lol... anyways had headaches today... wonder whos sick... and yeah i wrote another poem... shall post it below on another post...
o.0 ok now i know who was the one who is sick le.... pls take care =(
19 Aug 2009
So Near Yet So Far
As I stared blindly into the clear blue skys I made a glimpse a glamour in your eyes So cold yet so alluring as ice
I held myself to you close and hugged to feel the warmth and innocence of your heart but yet the stones so cold and hard
The rains begin to sing the birds begin to scream But as i saw the last of you The sjy turned ti shades of violets and hues.
As the raindrops begin to dance come the rainbows and the sun but thou hath naught and all else came to a crashing halt.
16 Aug 2009
omg i cant believe i thought of a poem xia... if you wana read it its below... today was quite a tiring and busy day... went for church in the morning... had breakfast.... den i smsed jie... "early in the morning 6 o clock... rainy and maggy go walkwalk" "rainy and maggy sitting on a tree k-i-s-s-i-n-g" she replied and told me not to give her heart attacks so early in the morning lol! the rest of the days are just studying and studying... though i did chat in maple for a while...
i thought i loved you much more than everyone... and of all.. you were the one who loved me the most... how could you just walk of without telling me anything? after so much we've been thru? you walk off leaving me just memories? memories that will blast stinging tears to me everytime i think of you? everytime i visit places we've been b4? the songs we sang? the things we did?
16 Aug 2009
Heres the poem i promised....
Love-Senses
If my love for you could be put in words... let it be beyond description... If my love for you could be painted in colours... let it be rainbows... If my love for you could be a taste... let it be everlasting sweetness.. If my love for you could be a smell... let it be a unique smell that hangs forever... If my love for you could be a sound... let it be gentle bells ringing in my ears...
If our love is the sea... it is the gentle crashing of the waves... If our love is the sky... it is the bounderless hues.... If our love is the weather... it is the raindrops that brings the rainbow... If our love is the forest... it is the dews that stick to the trees... If our love is a dream... it is a neverending haven...
Our love is a love that cannot be explained... it is a love that is never all too plain... and if love is everlasting love... let love be everything of the above... for your smile is like a sunburst... when all else is cloud in darkness...
15 Aug 2009
ok i edited this post... sry was too pissed off just now...
wow i saw a cheap gene bk 2 today.. 150m nia... carla said she lend me 40m... so yeah i bought it... den shadow didi was like... eh rain u open it lar... i asked him why he duwan open... he tell me he dun dare lol... he scared lata fail... tamade... i oso scared lor.. my hand shaking like mad... my heart almost popped out when i click open lor... wah heng sia it passed! SHIOK!!! my gene dmg from 20k become 45k =p now can 2 hits skele le haha =)
14 Aug 2009
Wah last nite jie sick wor... tell her to rest duwan... den nev slp sommore... today suppose meet her after sch.. she told me she kena h1n1 =X jie u better take care worx heng ytd i tell u dun go sch today... cos i predicted h1n1 le =p
13 Aug 2009
nth much today... only that rulz was smsing me whole day... eee very naughty xia she... trying to talk about me and maggy... so bad lor... den make me laugh so much in class.. ppl think i crazy xia... haha.. idiot lor... i doing maths halfway.... *tze tze* "eh wad u doing now? think of mag bathing ar? wad time u finish lesson" crazy girl xia she... den "dark u getting horny ar?" den she ask me wear shortshorts to tempt mag ZZZ really mad lor she.. den i say i cant take it gona explode... she ask me is laughing explode or the you-know-wad explode... LOL!! really lar... make me laugh till mad... den now im reading chem... den suddenly... *msn rings* "imagine you mag on your bed top naked... den he eating choc... den eerything melt onto him...." its like omg sick? lol! cao rulz... im suppose to study chem ar! not study mag ar! and she goes on..."chemistry? ohh... chemistry between u and mag ar!" LOL stupid bugger! anyway thkx for today... was actually very moody today... thkx to you everythings fine haha.... cao rulz! naughty rulz! thkkx to you i dun dare close my eyes le zZZZ and now... guess wad... shes making a sex storybook of us. ZZZ *hugs* <3
12 Aug 2009
dam tired today... din feel like toking... i duno wads wrong with me... i dun feel like my normal self... but thkx again to maggy and rulz... thkx for toking to me....
11 Aug 2009
well all... ive opened 6 boxes... the best was just a fire wand... sux lar.... stupid gm waste ppl money de... even my top dear so sad now... he wan quit maple le.... walao... i dam sad lar... he say he sell all his godly eq to buy keys... in the end his char naked =(
11 Aug 2009
oh well... mum asked me go sch in the morning siol... last nite couldnt slp leh... kept thinking of how to pon school and wad to do lol... ok lor... so today after morning lecture... i went off.... took a train down to plaza sing... apparently pcbunk closed down? lol... i din know xia... i read the rumours on the internet... din expect it to be true... cos during hols our usual peeps went there to lan leh... went to cathay... its still closed lol... thot of heading to park lane... den i went to park mall instead =.= blur me... i duno wads the diff... i thot same place mar... so ya anyways... went for the checkup at 3.... stupid guy go put some eye dilation drops.. now my eye so blur.. heng not so blur like cao nubby =p i could still find my way home =X oops... i think shes gona kill me *zao*
10 Aug 2009
o.0 tmr go for medical checkup wor... ponning sch again =p lalalalas.... long holiday siol....
10 Aug 2009
today is a holiday... dunit go to school haha.... omg... had a big storm last nite... the wind was howling and stuff... den got lightning... I pa pa wor... den i hide under blankie lol.... sadded... last time always got someone there to hug me de... haiish.... i miss you alot =(
today nth much lor.... want to study but cant study =X idk why wor.... so i went swimming and stuff... lol.. bored and nth to do...
~updated ytd post~
9 Aug 2009
o.0 i just rmb today national day.. lol.... meaning i can maple whole day muhahahha....
lalala... been mapling with shadow didi, laogong and cute didi lol... im bored... anyways... i was watching the myth and mapling at same time... omg the show dam nice lor.... haiz... make me dam sad lor... almost tear xia.... =(
the ndp wasnt that nice lar.... though i cant argue its better than previous years.... but i find alot of copying leh.... alot of ideas taken from the beijing olympic opening de... but i know im in no position to complain =X the actors did a great job ^^ i know how hard it is to put up a performance... especially to perform in front of the whole world is a big one! but then the songs are so crappy... the new ndp songs sux... i still prefer the older ones... i dun even get the themes of the new songs... the tune is oso very wierd.... wads more... they even got a techno (or wadever u call it) version of majulah singapoura? lol? is singapore trying to like "get young"? zzz... off to mapling..
eeek! i got caught stealing vodkaz from the fridge =X holy crapee!!! haha... wo bu she de open the bottle... dad just opened it.... so i had to get all down my throatee =p
8 Aug 2009
maplesea service sux lar... asiasoft sux... duno how to take care of problems de leh.. so many people complain about bugs in the game they dun even bother to fix it... good lar... now i know how those ppl in zkm or HT must have felt... every 30mins maple dc you cos of "hacking" how to even kill one boss that take u few hours? ytd i organize scarlion boss... my pt dam zai de lar... den tio dc den no bs den all die.... nama... stupid asiasoft...
8 Aug 2009
today leh... whole day out lor... had jap food again.. sushi was $1 per plate so i chiong alot... and my BS lev 132 le thkx shadow didi for playing for me...
sianz... i duno hows the end of year chalet gona work out xia... everythings going on badly.... i cant help but feel that on that day only me and ahboy turn up =X though ahboy is like MIAing too.... i dun think he will pangseh me lar rite bro? looking forward to be with you again =p
7 Aug 2009
today is national day celbration... supposedly to take attendance den zao de... cos im not involved in any events... but i just stayed cos nth to do lor... 0809 ppl say wan go lan... but lan like 10+ 11 den open... so i went to cookieboy hse first... den i go his hse change.... den we went to downtown east.... at first mag and joon say wan come de.... den in the end tio pangseh... aiyoi... i din play for so long... still got my old score 164 xia.... beat some people =p=p=p haha thkx cookie for peing me... and erm sry laogong today cant pei u.... =( maybe sept hols bah....
6 Aug 2009
early-end-lessons day today.... maybe i should go home and slp haha.... been very tired the last few days.... oh well... cant wait for 1pm... im now in library watching this movie called Tales from earthsea tatas
omg the show is like damn nice.... watched halfway nia... need go for lessons... shall finish it another day....
reached home at 2.... watched nada sousou.... omg!!! its like so freaking awesome!! but the story very sad wor... the cute boiboi died in the end.... seriously lor... when he young that time so cute... his sister oso... in the end leh.... that boyboy died at the age of 25... haiz... sad lor... den the sister kept crying wor... eeee.... i so feel like crying too =( his like so caring to the sis... love the sis so much... but he only grow till 25 den byebye liao... was watching this movie with mum and pr while having cup noodles for lunch...
omg... shadow didi boomed another of my dragon staff!!! argh!!! wasted 50m le lor... and gene bk 3 drop to 400m leh... i wana buy!!! sians i dun even have bk 2...
i cant wait for tmr xia.... national day celebration.... meaning that no lessons haha... maybe i shd go there take attendance and pon =p thinking of meeting laogong and ahboy tmr.... cos both saying wana go out... i duno how leh.. shd i intro both of them =p sounds like a good idea haha... but the two of them diff type de leh... duno if they can clique well... though both sec 2... one very naughty and lively... one very quiet and shy... den one like to engage in something to do.... the other like to slack... idk lar aiya.. so mafan lol...
haiz... think i shd just not bother about anything lar... i really dun understand why i shd even care.... you wan do wad u wan go ahead.... wads the point of even telling me.... you expect me to stop you? you keep telling me you wana mia.... wad can i do? i tell you duwan... you still keep insisting you wan mia... if i tell you go ahead... you will lose your temper thinking that i dun care.... so wad do you expect me to do? since you have already set your mind into going mia... might as well go mia and not tell me!
argh.... heng got cute didi pei me tok =p
5 Aug 2009
hehe today turned out quite well... went over to cute didi hse.... haha.... very long din go le... and i really really miss him wor... its just that his having his "o" level as well... so i chose not to disturb him lar.... but well recently im not feeling that good.... and he says he wana meet too.... so i guess i shall eat one of his day =p thkx cute didi for making me so happy today haha... really hope that both of us will do well for our exams wor den we can pei each other as much as we wan in the hols ^^
sry ahboy today din pei you.... i thot giddy wouldnt mind letting you go his hse... but i think his afraid of you turning his whole hse upside down haha.... dun wry lar.... i shall see you on friday k? i just got my allowance so we can go out again =p maybe i shall ask my laogong and shadow to folo too haha =)
hehe today was quite a day.... im like soo tired....
4 Aug 2009
Oh the dreaded common lunch break is here again... 2 and half hour break... and guess wad... i forgot about this morn econs lesson... so i missed it lol... anyways... im so tempted to open more boxes =p should i buy the keys or not? haha... hopefully can kena my gene book....
aiyo not enough money buy my keys =X sadded.... cos they sell 20k 10k no stock... sobs.... nvm tmr i pei cute didi open haha.... now trying to earn back money in maple.... maggy and shadow didi helping me earn wor thkx =p love you <3
aiyo these few days damn sian... everyone going mia... idk lar... i dun feel like caring le lor... no matter how much i say ppl duwan listen.... i duwan care le... not only one person wor.... its like so many other peopl miaing... and at least 2 other still come tell me and they wan mia.... =( haiz... so ive been trying to maple to get myself out from boredom.... and lucky still got shadow and maggy pei wor haha... and recently cute didi keep contacting me worx.... hehe... thkx didi at least im not so gu dan liao =) <3x3<3
ohya and i found this movie sotongyi was toking about that time.... she said she watched on plane to japan.... its called "nada sou sou" which atcually means "tears for you" haven fully watched it yet.... i just copied the movie into my cpu lol... den when i have time i go watch... the starting not bad sei... who wan pei me watch ^^
3 Aug 2009
o.0 surprisingly cute didi called me today.... and guess wad his mapling too lol... den i chatted and did my hw with him... he bought 40k ppc.... den he opened a few gold boxes... first one io berserk book 3 le xia... bloody tyco.... anyways.... i scrolled my dragon staff... passed 3 70%... boomed at last one... lol... den i bought another dargon staff... so now left 500k =X anyways maybe tmr me and didi gona open more boxes... i wan my gene 2 and 3!!! =p
2 Aug 2009
Eee... today whole day mapling again lol... firstly my windbreaker lev 71 le yeah!!! den my bishop lev 130!!!! WOOTS!!! anyways... thkx mag and shadow didi for peing me today... whole day mapling was fun!! haha wait till dec hols we do it again k?
at first went emo abit today... duno why... been crying alot lately... heart sad.... but thkx to these peeps... you just cheered me up =p den at nite cute didi and mei and me had a conference... omg its been like how many mths since we 3 spoke to each other lar! haha.. looking forward to meet u 3.... =p=p
1 Aug 2009
Spending the whole day mapling again... have to get some things out of my mind.. and thkx again my dearest mag for listening to my cries... though you arent physically here... but thkx for giving me the support... and thkx again for lisetning to all my probs... i know you arent really happy with yourself either... i hope that you can share with me your prob too... and hopefully we can solve our probs tgt =p
1 Aug 2009
a new month has come... last month shockingly was a very bad month indeed... well at least a bad one for those around me... firstly.. the atmosphere is getting very mody and tensed... everyones not feeling good.... and plus everyones sick...
i guess i still got lots of stuff to do this month.... like preparing for my prelims... and well... solving many relationship probs...
i guess the hard ones would be the relationship probs... i guess i have been running away for too long... far too long...
haiz... i duno how long i would have to continue running... im like trying to play maple to forget everything... thanks mag for toking to me... and THANK YOU FOR FALLING ASLP WHILE CHATTING WITH ME!!!!! lol... ya.. he literally fell aslp... he say he go close eyes.... den close liao nev open.. zzz good lor nice pangseh rawr!!!!
31 July 2009
whole family sick accept me... so im hiding myself in my room haha...
not in the mood now really... im feeling real frustrated... for wad reason? i dun know... i just feel very pekcek for no reason at all... argh!!! i nid someone to tok to =( anybody.....
well at least didi called me... though it helps a bit... din help much... tried to call other people... all nev ans or busy... heng ar got laogong... he urged me go maple find him... at least it took my mind off for a while....
it just feels wierd being cooped in your own room not cos ur sick... but its cos everyone else is sick... ur the only healthy one... ZZZ
30 July 2009
Oh nice.... had a lecture test today.. and i wasnt even notified.... oh great... nice failure again... anyways... PR kena H1N1.... sianz... got all the symptoms... went to see doctor.. doc says he has 80% chance of having it... oh well... i hope i dun get it.. if i kena... thats the end of meeting with didi liao... den i cant meet him for 10 bloody days!!! yeah anyways... im keeping myself in my own room... duwan kena =p to all those who wana meet me... meet at your own risk =) i will not hold responsibility if anyone fall sick worx... i give you warning le ar ^^ jk lar... im just keeping on guard for the next few days....
29 July 2009
lol today cant concentrate in class... kept thinking of the tests xia... in the end both econs and maths no test... maths tcher nid go early... so he postpone the test... den i asked econs tcher to pass me the test so i go home do... cos i end early today... den test is from 3 to 6... i rather go home do lol... anyways... i asked didi if he wana meet after my school and his bball for a while... he said ok.... so in the mean time i thot i shd go visit shadow didi.. but his pout with his frends... and elaine mei oso out... so i went to bugis alone for a short walk... kinda lost there.. din go there for like 10 years... changed so much till i dun recognise it.. and i got lost.. the food there rox... especially the yakitori... omg and its only 1$ per stick! i bought 5.... and a cream puff.... i took one bite on the cream puff and all the cream spilled out lol... anyway... i met another mei lol... she came to bugis with her frends... den i said hi... den bye lol.. den i went to find didi.... but he alrdy home.. so nvm lor... i went home too...
anyways... something random... Im just choosing to act ignorant... i dun feel like foloing and doing what you want on your mind... you think im oblivious to your attitude character and actions? think twice.... you speaking to jean grey here =p jean grey the mind reader =X
=( i miss eeu badly.... when will u forgive me and start trusting me again ='(
28 July 2009
Lol today went preety fast... i din go for chem remedial... cos i din do the work... last 2 school days i MIA... so duno wads going on mar... so i went home lor.... den mei so nub duno how tune the tartar... so i had to do it for her... so nub xia =p den i today very high.... spamming ppl smses in school lol... den i was playing my tartar and singing at the swimming pool there... cool xia... last time i can play nia. cant play and sing... now can le... lol... though im finding more scores.... anyone got canon guitar finguring? haha....duwan tabs... i wan solo scores.... and i just found out that my tuna can use le =p its no longer spoilt haha... tuna and tartars... lol... nice match... if you know wad im toking about =p
haiz... and im all over thinking about you again.... must things really go that bad for us? haiz... i miss the laughter and smile of yours... all i have now is the memories of yours.... when will these memories turn real?
27 July 2009
Chiisana te no hira
tooku de tooku de yureteru inaho no umi ho wo age ho wo age mezashita omoide he to bokura wa kyou made no kanashii koto zenbu oboeteru ka, wasureta ka
chiisana te ni mo itsukara ka bokura oikoshiteku tsuyosa ureta budou no shita naiteta hi kara aruita chiisana te de mo hanarete mo bokura wa kono michi yukunda itsuka kuru hi wa ichiban no omoide wo shimatte
kisetsu wa utsuri mou tsumetai kaze ga tsutsumarete nemure ano haru no uta no naka de
chiisana te ni mo itsukara ka bokura oikoshiteku tsuyosa nureta hoho ni wa dore dake no egao ga utsutta chiisana te de mo hanarete mo bokura ha kono michi yukunda soshite kuru hi wa bokura mo omoide wo shimatta
chiisana te demo itsu no hi ka bokura oikoshite yukunda yagate kuru hi wa atarashii kisetsu wo hiraita
the new song on my blog... the one that made me cry... was listening to this song on my ipod this morn.... why i cried i oso duno... this song very sad lar... and for those who have watched the maple movie clip on youtube called white rose... u will know why...
din go to school again today... had medical checkup for my back... woke up at 6+.... longbang dads car to jurong... ate breakfast at mac... den i emo all the way till 930 at jurong point... cos too early no one there... den very dark... den i started thinking of lots of things... den i thot of you... haiz... i really miss being with you.... i miss the times we had together... i dun care how much u lied to meven for so many years... you know that my love for you has washed away everything... i have long forgiven and forgotten about them.... wad i do hope is that you can forgive too for all the blunders i made... because i seriously cant take it anymore to watch u from afar... and let everyday go pass... and see our friendship drift off....
walked to medical centre and waited... 950... doc not here... his late... our appointement was 950... 10am.. he strolled in.... and i doubt the hosp understand the term appointement... where got i appointment with doctor 950.. den he go treat the patients who came before me first? appointment means i already book timing with him le wad... stupid xia... like that i book appointment for wad? might as well go there direct and take queue... anyways he checked for nerve problems... said everything was fine.... asked me to go for xray.... after xray... he said my spine was too straight.... not the usual slight curve... he said maybe is muscle problem... so ask me to come back for physio theraphy.. den he gave me some medicine... the funny thing is... i was supposed to pay for medication... consultation was free and paid by army... the cashier din know and said the fee was $0.00 so i walked off without paying lol.... lost my phone pouch... unfortunately i left it somewhere while smsing ppl... lucky the nurse found it and return me haha... the whole consultation finished at 12... i walked around jurong point again... this time all the shops are open... mall is very bright... so cant emo haha.. wanted to buy lots of things but not enough money... omg i so love the lava lamp! its a good collection beside my fountain/waterfall haha... whos that kind soul that will buy for me pl0x =X anyways i was trying to find ppl to pei me.. but unfortunately no one... shopped tll 230... took train back... from boon lay to outram... den at outram i changed train... suppose to take to sengkang... i took wrong direction... ended up at harbourfront lol... den bro called me... say he finish sch... i ask he eat lunch le mar.. since we both haven eat.. i decided to eat with him lor.. i asked him to wait at hougang station.. den "walk to the but of the train... im at the ass of the train" lol... i think he cant diffrentiate between the front and back lor... he went to the front instead lol... in the end he came to the back and found me.. and that was 2+... swensons still having the buy one get one free thingy... decided to eat with him... i ate salmon cream pasta... bro ate chix bake rice... den in the end i must finish both cos bro eat 3 quarters den full liao... went to mini toons to shop for gift.... den mei finish school.... she come my hse zhorzhor with her bf... she say wana borrow my tartar.... lent her my tartar.... and i sneaked the gift inside lol... hope she liked it... mei... if u open the tartar bag and found that plastic bag hor... its for u de... not i forget take out =p i hope u like it... wanted to buy something nicer but i found that today bo lui.. im so sry... well i hope that cheers you up... rmb sad le must see that thing and rmb me worx... dun sad le lar k? haha.... <3
26 July 2009
omg damn happy xia.... today keep waking up at 7am and every 5 min intervals... forced myself back to slp.... cos today my church had funfair... den ahboy say he coming t 8am.... so was damn excited... sis said she will be late.... 8am came... no one answered the phone.. i waited at our meeting place and waited for 30mins... ahboy called back and say he fell aslp... den he rushed here... 9am reached... den we go eat breakfast at church there... met with relatives and family... alot ppl say he damn cute... sis said she coming at 9am... but i think shes aslp... 10+ me and ahboy went rivervale mall to walkwalk... he bought a domo pencil box... damn it... i wanted to buy lor... my pencil box just lost xia... he took the last one... anyways... had lots of funny things... like he started singing MJ songs with me at videoEZ... den i was sitting down... he started climbing all over my back lol... damn pain xia... his knee so hard.... anyways... he was having lunch at kfc... i nev bring wallet... so i kope his food.... and yeah... he did all sorts of stupid funny things that keep making me laugh... like sliding down the chair and say his melting... lol... pesky little kid.... and den about 1230 he left... sis came at 11+ and joined us for LJS.... den after bro left.... sis came to my hse... at first we slacked at the rooftop there.... cos parents at home... but mm asked me to bring her home.. i think she curious lar lol... den was playing the guitar and teacher sis how to play... was o2JAMming too... den youtube watching those stupid funny shows... den about 5 sis left lor... she wana borrow my gutar de.... but in the end she din lol.. she scared spoil it... sis be happy k? i will always be there if u nid my help =p
holyshyt! im in a state of shock!!! im back from church.... trying to tok things out... den i just found out some "incredible" news... shocking news actually... i din know.... i diin knowww.... i diiiin knowww..... OMG!!! im still in a state of shock ar!!!
25 July 2009
omg!! absolut boyfriend last episode!!! so sad... that knight... he love that girl so much... he lost all his robotic programs... he became 100% humane... but in the process the programme crashed and he died.... walao... damn sad... almost cried... den maggy laogong was toking to me... so i couldnt cry lol.... its just damn sad lar.... omg i feel like watching the show again!!!!
ok let see about this morn... nth much today.... just studying and hogging the internet.... tmr leh... very luan lar.. duno if its still going on... crapped up.... somehow i duno why but my itunes got trojan? so im running a virus scan now... feeling bored... looking forward to tmr's funfair in church... anyone wana come mar?
bored... veryvery bored... i must ve too bored to type this sentence lol... apparently no one to tok to today... and im going into a state of emo soon... very bored and my mind wandered off somewhere else.... and i den some thoughts came back to my mind again...
24 July 2009
oh well din go to school today... have medical checkup for the NS thingy... guess wad... i only get A for my hearing test... have to go vback another day for my eye specialist checkup... and monday have to go to hospital for my back check... so yeah monday no school again =p anyways the tests are quite dumb... i lied on some computer questions... they asked about how i like about certain things like diving and stuff... cos i heard that if u put yes they will send u to navy diving and stuff... so i put a "no" to everything lol.. wonder where they will send me to.... lots of other tests like blood urine and xray tests... blahblahblah took the whole monring out of me... supposed to have the checkup in the afternoon... but i went early cos i had nth to do... so i finished it in the morning... lots of funny things happened in there lol... like how this guy got poked by the needle twice lol... and how ppl could pee on their hand while trying to get urine samples into a bottle... haha... anyways im like so free... nth to do now lol... trying to find people to tok to... but apprently no one lor....
23 July 2009
oh well the firefox seem preety useful.... haha... and now the whole com lab and library is full of firefox users... and u can see all the funny websites popping out... and games and music lol...
ok today nth much.... after school went to mss to pass didi the thumbdrive i promised ytd... cos ytd couldnt meet him so today i passed to him... and his now chionging CS le lol...
mapling with mag and shadow.... and sis went missing again... mag so funny... i asked him wana marry in maple... he say i pay 30k... i said his the guy he shd pay lol... my archer is a female.. den i said if he wan me pay... he restart a girl de and marry my male bishop lol... (but bishops arent suppose to be married anyway lol) or we could wait till maple allows gay marriage lol!! did some facebook quiz....
1. How old are you? Seventeen
2. Are you single? Maybe? Maybe not?
3. At what age do you think you'll get married? Lol.. haven considered... but i dun wan be so old in the wedding suit.... i wana be yong and yandao in it lol.. so most prob 25?
4. Do you think you'll be marrying the person you are with now? Lol... Lalalala... Not applicable lol...
5. if not, who do you want to marry? Hmm... good question...
6. Who will be your bridesmaid & best man? Hmm... one of my meis or jies and one of my didis or kors
7. Do you want a garden/beach or traditional wedding? Hmm.. i wana get married in a church next to lake takapo in new zealand Next to the ...(refer to next question)... probably in the morning during sunrise in the winter...(omg it sounds splendid!!!)
8. Where do you plan to go on honeymoon? Firstly lake takapo(or wadever u spell it) in new zealand... nice cottage with fields or elderwiess and fresh lavenders... and beyond that a lake in front of mountains.... OMG!!!!! Den fly to venice...i love the gondolas... den fly to paris go eiffel tower and have private moments.... den fly to canada... wana see the night sky and northernlights(auroras) with her... den go to swizterland for the alps... omg a perfect honeymoon!!!
9. How many guests do you think you'll invite? Hmm... all my friends my familes... and her side as well...
10. Will that include your exes? Well... i rather she be the first and only...
11. How many layers of cake do you want? Lol...first layer strawberry cake...(didi's favourite haha) second layer chocolate cake... (didi and my fav) third layer vanilla cake... fourth layer banana cake fifth layer mango cake six layer banana cake seventh layer..... havent thot of the rest yet... but i think the first layer should actually be her favourite cake though... den the rest....
12. When do you want to get married, morning or evening? Oooh... i already said in the above... sunrise... at lake takapo.. when the birds are singing...(hope they dun freeze... and i dun think there are any birds in winter) and the snow top fullly white with snow... the frosted lake.... the ice capped conifers... and of course light and mild snow flakes dropping from heaven.... but i think the elderwiess and lavenders would have died in winter...
13. Name the song/tune you'd like to play at your wedding. Anything that carries a light tune for abit of waltz on the frosted lake...
14. Do you prefer fine dining or just normal spoon, fork and knife? Hmm... prob a candle light dinner on the frosted lake... (hope the ice doesnt give way lol... it would be horrendous and disastrous...)
15. Champagne or red wine? Erm... vodkaz... its my favourite lol.... absolut vodkaz from the russians =p
16. Honeymoon right after the wedding or days after the wedding? Right after bah.... since the first stop of honeymoon is the place im gona get married in.... but im afraid my family especially my didis will come bothering me lol...
17. Money or household items? Neh... none.... money is evil.... household items are murder tools... LOL
18. How many kids would you like to have? Hmm.. shall discuss with her... but i guess i would like to have 2... one elder son.. one younger daughter... but decision aint mine alone ^^ i think i would love a quiet year or 2 b4 going for a bigger family...
19. Will you record your honeymoon in DVD/CD? Oh yes! and i would love to have an eternal imprint on my mind too!!!
20. Whose wedding plan would you like to know next? Everyone elses!!!
so lame lar... but at least it took my mind off some stuff...
apparently i just found out that someone whom i trusted so much... and loved so much just hurt me again... haiz... if you wana cut contacts.... just tell me.... stop deleting me off facebook and stuff.... and den block me on msn.... you know how much it hurts when i logon to someone else's acct and found out that your just hiding from me... for 1 whole year! so i guess that the switchedoff handphone thingy was a fake? and that your just blocking me on your phone too? oh fk it... if you hate me so much just tell me so!
22 July 2009
Im in school today... i forgot that school starts at 9... cos wed and thurs time table had a switch for this week... and wheres the total solar eclipse as promised? lol... i cant even find the sun... its so totally covered by the clouds.... didi called me... he had e-learning day today.. so no school... he woke up so early to watch the eclipse on TV.... lol... anyway his voice was a energy booster for me! haha... im wide awake now!!! and he starts asking me about the solar eclipse in india!! lol... and he starts saying that in india they cant see each other... cos its super duper dark... no sun sommore... and they can do lots of stuff.... without being seen or caught... lol! hey didi its international frendship week.... racial harmony day!!!! crap xia he... den he starts toking about his school work like cakes... chinese like strawberry cake... very nice eat... den duno wad cake.... den maths is tiramisu... his most hated cake... lol!!! he just made me laugh so hard in the library lar... lucky there no one in the library anyway... gona end school at 1pm today... haha... and bro says his gona spend his offday disrupting my lessons by spamming calls... lol lar... cya lata... tartar(tatas)!!!
ok im having my first and last break.... well i just found something damn nice... thkx to the guy sitting next to me in the com lab... the stupid admin banned all the websites in internet explorer... but not the internet... so i guess its just a program side ban... so i installed firefox... and guess wad? it works!!! now i can excess to any websites that are previously banned! like games and youtube and facebook!!!! yeah!!! breaks are no longer as boring!!! anyways... didi called me during break just now... crapped so much lol...
ok im going for my next lesson le... cya!!!
Ok... din go to bro's today... cos dad took halfday to pei me tok... he felt that i was not feeling well ytd.. and he read my blog... so we decided to have a good chat...
hey thkx dad... the talk made me feel better... im sry for those things i wrote and did that hurt you... it wasnt intentional... i was just venting my anger then...
didi ar... im so sry for making you wait whole day leh... cos dad took the half day off le... maybe another time bah... and yeah thkx for all the cheering up ^^ felt much better =p
lol didi is so funny... we were chatting about some "serious" stuff... wah his the impossible man... kept making me laugh... and then he said good nite... kup the phone... 5min lata... yo im back!!! lolz...
21 July 2009
I miss you - Miley Cyrus - Hannah Montana Banana...
Sha-la-la-la-la, sha-la-la-la-la You used to call me your angel Said I was sent straight down from heaven You'd hold me close in your arms
I loved the way you felt so strong I never wanted you to leave I wanted you to stay here holding me
[CHORUS:] I miss you I miss your smile And I still shed a tear Every once in a while And even though it's different now You're still here somehow [ Find more Lyrics on www.mp3lyrics.org/qRXU ] My heart won't let you go And I need you to know I miss you, sha la la la la I miss you
You used to call me your dreamer And now I'm living out my dream Oh how I wish you could see Everything that's happening for me I'm thinking back on the past It's true that time is flying by too fast
[CHORUS]
I know you're in a better place, yeah But I wish that I could see your face, oh I know you're where you need to be Even though it's not here with me
[CHORUS x2]
a short but dreaful day... its racial harmony day... i cant call that ahneh beside me blackie again... ooops... i just did lol.... ok... so today had 3hour of lesson.. den i went to my classmates hse.... cos nowhere to go... dun feel like going home.... home is no longer a home to me now.... more like some cell... slacked at his hse for 4 gruesome hour... nth but seeing him play his gundam stuff.... den went back get econs marks.. failed again... hooray! first time in my life i failed all my subjects!! im so (not) proud of it!!! anyways after school went to meet sis at hgm... den went to sotongyi hse... apparently she cooked lunch for us =p thkx!!! really almost died just now... damn hungry... din eat today. sat awhile when bro called me... he said he coming over too... so i went to school to pick him up... he came and slacked for another 30mins or so den he left... i brought him to the bustop and came back to jy hse... den 5mins lata.... jy say got tuition so we had to leave.... anyway thkx guys... i feel much better....
had a swim at 8pm... night swim... thought i could get lots of probs away.... but think i was wrong... not only i got pissed off.. i started crying again.... i was singing lots of sad songs... and i kept thinking of so many people i missed in my life... life just sux...
i feel so fked up... i nid a break.... a long break.....
i need someone whom i can tok to... who actually cares.... whom i can trust...
20 July 2009
piggy didi... Yungwai didi... Jonathan... And to all those I promised to study hard... I'm really sry... I've disappointed u again... I just got my midyr totally screwed... Failed every single paper... I feel so miserable.... Couldn't felt so useless again... And I broke down again... I'm not sure wad to do... I've tried studying... But still it din help... Maybe I'm just dumb... I'm sry...
20 July 2009
oh well.... today gopal din come to sch... shiok xia 2 hr break.... im like praying that she doesnt come tmr too... cos its thkx to her lesson that we have to stay till 3.... if no her lesson... we end at 11.... cos Civic tutorial + common lunch break + english = 4 hours... lol... anyways... getting my physics lata... damn worried... think i may fail... anyways im gona meet bro after this... wadever the results... im gona push myself harder ^^
argh this 2 hr break is boring... why must there be physics after this damn break.... im like trying to find ppl chat.. but my msn is only like 9 on9... and no one replied me a single sms since last nite.... that sux.... and im gona sleep thru 3 more hours of physics...
haiz... and yeah kor was msning with me throughout the break... im feeling damn sad... i seriously miss him... and our days tgt... with cute didi... just the 3 of us... and then i thought of jam again... and i had to hold back my tears.... im sry kor... i know you had moved on... but i could not... after re-reading those smses... i felt so dumb.... that i din unds her enough when shes with us.... and i din love and treasure her love enough.... though i felt she was so silly to have waited for me then.... now i have truly unds how she must have felt then....
jam... if your reading this... pls know that im missing you... that i really did love you... do love you... and will love you forever.... as you said... the one who waits is the one who gains... even if its a thousand years... its worth the wait...
19 July 2009
lol i woke up at 630.... playing maple lol... and yung wai didi smsed me... lol... i supposed he forgot to put the +65 thats why couldnt reach me... lol.... and i sent him a hugs that cost me 50cents zzz its worth it though lol... anyways.... going out to watch harry potter lata....
im home... guess wad... as i thought so harry potter sux... its not surprising.... ever since the 3rd movie, its been very disappointing.... theres so much error in the movie.... those who haven watched... below are some spoilers... like harry is supposed to be at his uncles place when dumbledore came.. not at the railway dating a muggle.... harry is supposed to be saved by tonks when he kena hit by malfoy in the train... not looney lovegood... harry should be caught by snape b4 entering hogwarts... not flitwick... theres supposed to be some fight between auror and deatheaters at the end... but theres nth.... i thot that there was at least some battle scenes... turn out im wrong... nth interesting bout this show anyway... so to those who dun folo the seqel, pls dun watch it... u will get confused.... you will be blur... and dun unds the whole story... i had a hard time explaining to my dad about the whole thing after the movie... and for those who haven read book 6, pls go read it b4 watching.... anyways.... ive seen this bloody short wizard at movie 3... i din know it was flitwick... cos flitwick was diff from in movie 1.. in movie 1 he looks like yoda from star wars to some extent... in movie 3 onwards he looked like some nerdy short guy... anyways... this show is a disappointment... dun think im gona watch it with shadow liao... shadow didi... go watch with your frends bah... i duwan waste my money on this....
anyways.. had dinner at The Jewel Box at mount faber... well the food is ex... one soup is $10... the food wasnt that nice... but the ambience is fantastic... the wind and night sky is romantic enough... if there are no city view... unfortunately the city view spoils it all... like the roads and construction and buildings below....
was toking to bro just now.... haha... and i guess we maybe gona meet tmr again... cos tmr get physics paper.. im damn scared...
18 July 2009
*got extra things added below*
Oh i just woke up... stupid maggy keep saying me lol... i said i got stomach cramps again.. ytd i din eat.... den i think i kena... i told him i very emo and pain den he ask why i got cramp.... i said pms... moodswing lol! den he said... i din know you are a female... i said im a bi... den he laughed... den i said u dun believe ar? i show u my dick... he said... maybe u plastic surgery to female... i said i still have it... he said maybe u from female become male? lol stupid mag... i wanted to go back slp oso cannot... hey maggy thkx for cheering me up... as they say laughter is the best medicine... but i think i laughed to hard... stomach more cramp... it was damn funny.... and didi called me in the morn to ask me play lan with him... lol... sry bro... dad wun allow... anyways supposed to go church at nativity today... but i said nvm.. i duwan go there see someone.... decided go for the st annes one instead...
hey maggy... thkx for hearing my rants and supporting me since we met... love HeavenXGuild!!! and yeah i kinda miss you alot lol... cos u went MIA for a while... anyways... can we like meet next week? or the week after next? lol... cao maggy stop cr8ing so many char lar... ur like catching up to the number of spare chars i have le leh.. my bl full of this ign called magget.... next time u cant think of any names u go put mcnugget lar... lol... ohya... u asked why i emo last nite? u read the post below this.... u will know le lor.... means u haven read my post lar? tmd.... slap u *piakx*
lol whole day keep laughing... cao mag.... lol after church didi call me tok... den i oso mapling... den i say i nid bathe.... den laogong say he wan pei me bathe... he said that in the guild chat lar.... den ppl say alot sick stuff... duno wad finger duno wad fk..... lol... den say horny duno wad porn... eeewww.... its damn sick... den laogong say he wan come my hse pei me.... ahhhh!!!!! *runs lol... anyway he cant get past the security guards anyway.... =p lol... but at least im not emo today ^^ thkx again laogong!!!
didi smsed me at 1218am.... apparently he cant slp... and i so cant i... lol..
ok rainy is feeling quite perked up today... thkx to maggy's medicine!! yumyum maggie mee!!!hahahaX
18 July 2009
you know... im feeling so jealous... ive been reading this book called when rainbows end by cecilia ahern... im like so jealous.... i really really wish i could have a best frend who is wiling to stick by me til old... imagine that they were best friends from 5years old to end of life!! haiz... ive always dreamed of somone... who can stick by me forever... somone who unds and knows wad im doing... who doesnt cares a fk about the world whenever we are tgt... doesnt care if the world give a fk about the 2 of us... and we can stay at each others hse w/o anyone caring... and abv all... somone whos there everyday of my life... giving me the fullest support i always need... ah well... kinda makes me feel very jealous... escpeically dating by the nite life of the beach.... shooting stars and auroras... and proposing ina posh and grand way? im so full of acid now though.. but i guess such stuff will never happen though... like wad i always tell myself... fairytales dun come true...
hey yungwai didi... grats for that wonderful results.. im awaiting for your sms though... you said i would be the first to recieve your sms from your new hp? haha..that was sweet of you... and its great news that you will be coming to sg to study in the uni? 3 more years is a long wait though... im so tempted to go down kl to visit you... but apparently mum says that you maybe a hoax and i may not return home lol!!! so well i go to wait for you to come... how bout staying with me eh? thats if i found a place to stay.... not at my hse though... my parents are sure to object... so maybe we could study in the same uni? same course? work the same office? omg im so thrilled at the thought of this... and we even said that we will live tgt and maybe go overseas tgt? haha... alaska sounds nice... so is snorkling and diving at africa... but hey bro... money... its not gona be cheap though... haha... so in the mean time lets work hard k? good luck for your exams... love you and thanks for all the support you gave me... though your like in another country... i really feel close to you whenever we are chatting on the net... love you lots!!! and thanks for loving me too....
hey maggy... i dun know if you read my blog... but i shall post it anyway... thxnks for all the support youve showed me... thanks for being that maple laogong for me...lol.. had lots of fun being with you and TOP and andrea and yungwai didi and others on maple... you know the reason i stayed in maple was because i missed you guys? and its becos that i really feel happy when im mapling with you all... its the only time i felt that i really had frends who cared for me... like when u know i wasnt feeling well.. u wanted to meet me to pei me... even though we dun even know each other in rl... thanks for all your love and care... i love you lots....
im kinda feeling depressed now.... sry for being that sour puss... maybe that friend thingy has made me edgy... and im feeling all confused again... its like going thru a whole new cycle.... and im like crying while watching absolut boyfriend... its so sad.... ARGH!!! i cant get things rite....
didi... thkx for peing me just now.... thkx for making me laugh too... but i think the after effects have wore off... sry for that waste of your energy...
i really miss and love you.... jam val ling... if your there... at least let me know that you still love and care for me... i nid you... im going crazy soon...
im tired... stressed... sad... afraid... i just so feel like crying... i feel like screaming... im just so tired.... i need a rest... a break.... and of cos... i nid whoever cares or love me...to pei me....
17 July 2009
oh wad a grat day today was... din pay much attention in school... toking nonstop and reading my book just to let the day pass quickly... anways went home to maple a while at the same time waiting for didi to finish his cca... was supposed to go to vivo today with him to chill out... really nid a breather from the stress... at first sis din wana come... but in the end she appeared... and she brought jy and liping along... and so we met at hg mall.. and i duno wads going on... firstly jy had tuition at 7... and liping got not enough money to go vivo... so sis suggested kovan.. well wasnt keen but went nevertheless... had "dinner" at mac... shared a meal with didi though... was saving money for lata.. at 7 didi said he going home... was wondering if i should go vivo alone... but because time sux... so i cant really go there... anyways... its been a long time since i last bowled... decided to bowl away all my anger and probs and stress... played only 1 game though... not enough money.... its expensinve cos its friday nite... anyway had to pay for shoe rental and socks.... cos thats a last minute thing and i din bring my gears along... overall today wasnt that well as planned... wasnt that bad either...
16 July 2009
Omg can u believe me? i just spent 80 bucks at NTUC... buying food and drinks... oh well.... there wasnt much to talk about today... just like to tok about how im feeling now...
firstly... im stressed.... stressed out by exams and other personal stuff... so if i hurt anyone accidentally pls forgive me... secondly.... i know wad im doing... i have a reason for doing everything... why do i keep giving in to other people and not make my stand? firstly... i dun like fights... i hate quarrels... i dun wana hurt people... and dun wana hurt myself... so im just gona let everything go pass without bothering... i know i used to be somone who likes to fight back for any reason in the past... but when i think about myself... i feel that im not the peaceful person im meant to be... to me.. im borned in the world to love... to create peace... and make people happy... that brings me to my next point... im treating my family so well... out of love... no other gains... though some of you may say im stupid... that im actually losing my own life.. but i dun care... to me as long as the person next to me is happy... thats all it matters... i have reasons for choosing to be close to some people... like for didi... i know his not wealthy... his not as fortunate as others... i just hope that by being with him... i can share some of my life with him... make him feel that he is being loved and cared... and that he can be as fortunate as his other peers... its sort of like my life is about helping others... loving others... and caring for others... why do i put in so much effort into a relationship? because i feel that relationships are worth the effort... moreover to me his a part of my family... and family support each other... to me... his not a frend.... nor a best frend.. to me he is my brother... and forever will be... the third thing.. i dun doubt my sexuality... i know im normal... i know why u others keep saying bout me... cos i always give in... im weak... dun fight... dun scold... ive gave u the reasons le... i long for peace.... and yes i do treat girls and guys equally.... i believe in gender equity... so wadever i do to a guy... i will treat a girl the same... and thats if they are from under the same category (e.g. family,frends etc) you dun see me treating a girl and guy diff unless they are from diff category... and since when is there a law that says only girls can wear short shorts? and guys have to wear long shorts? i can just say that society is getting too immature and oversensitive.... in the sense that love between 2 guy frends have become gay and love between girl frends are lesbians... and the only love that can exist is between guy and girl? well of cos i dun mean the BGF type of love... i meant the frend-frend love.... and how come a girl can hug another girl in public with nth wrong.. while a guy cant do that to another guy? etcetc... well.... all in all... i guess its just that im different from society... or at least... i choose to be different... because being diff allows me to see things that others cant.... like how many people know wad true love is all about? how many people know wads unconditional love? how many people know wads peace? how many people really understand about the word relationship? how many people really understand the words true happiness??
16 July 2009
i guess i really have to put everything on hold... no more computer games... no more friends... lesser tv.... lesser going outs... but i cant and will never sacrifice my loved ones for that dumb exam... i will still spend time with you all de... just that its not gona be so long and frequesnt liao... maybe instead of everyday... maybe alternate days if i can... worse come to worse... maybe once a week... no lesser than once a week ar!! i will go crazy de... and of cos i cant neglect my time spent for god too... i feel so ashamed when i nev turn up for SALT sessions for so many mths... ppl were wondering where i went...
oh well sis.. i hope u know wad ur doing... wadever u do... i will always support u de k? dun wry... everytime something bad happens... something unexpected will pop by to help u de... so just look forward to that unexpected!!! haha...superman nid rest de... give yourself some offday worx... dun overtire yourself...
heyhey jy... wads going on... i couldnt get you on your phone wor... i hope your fine...(though i think your not) haiz... im sry for neglecting you the past few days... i hope the days ahead should be better... my exams screwed up totally... so i nid to watch my time management le... prelims coming in 2 mths... nid to buck up... so should u!!! your n level ar!!! dun tell me you not gona care hor... i bite you ar!!! dun forget we got a date every week xia.. nid to help u on your studies siol... yeah i know... however busy i am... i nid a day off... and im spending my day off to teach you all ar!!!! so u better pay attention and learn... dun waste my precious day off!!! tell u le... got anything just call me... me 24/7 helpline de... though im busy most of the time... call me if got anything impt lor... impt doesnt count meddling with other ppl life hor... especialy that YQ... tell u le.. dun make me nag again... u have so much probs with your life le... solve them b4 meddling with other people... dun waste your energy scolding or fighting or caring bout ppl who are worthless... u got any xin shi u can tell me... i try my best to help... if my phone dun pick up me...(lol sala!! if me dun pick up phone!!).. den leave me a msg lor... JYJYJY(jiayou not jiayi =.=) Gambate!!! you can do it!!!
im still feeling useless... im still watching u suffer and i cant do a fk about it... and all i can do is to watch you silently... and cry becos i cant do nothing about it... i hope u know that... whenever i think about u.... my heart hurts... well... thats if i have a heart...
15 July 2009
Oh well im in school now... very bored with nth to do... still have like 5 more hours? im bored... super bored... meeting didi lata... not sure wad to do... maybe go watch harry potter? just came out... not sure if its nice.... anyways im gona watch it on sunday with parents le... im still feeling confused... mixed feelings... confused feelings... not sure if my haert is telling the truth... or maybe... my heart is long gone...
sis ar sis ar... as wad i have alrdy said... superman oso nid to rest de... its time to forget everything else... trust your heart... no matter how confused your feelings are... your heart will always tell the truth... its time u learn how to be selfish a little.. u cant please people all the time... u will get tired of that... i know wad your thinking... i understand it... go and take a break... a rest... leave those probs alone first... after u are refreshed... den go again... dun forget... i will always be supporting you =p
haiz... fk it.. today sux.... not only did i not get to see bro... i got pissed off... firstly called jy see if she can pei me but she bo ans.... hp off... she oso not at home... this one nvm.. i can unds... den went to find bro... but his nowhere to be found... phone no ans... nev leave any msgs... was quite pissed off alrdy.... got even more pissed off when i couldnt find him.. oh well... sry bro... i wasnt in a good mood today... bro called after making me wait 2 hours... he ask me go his hse... when i went there... guess wad... his mum came and so he cant find me... fk... was really pissed off... called shadow to chat.... had to calm down.... i just idled and waste my time lor... suppose to have last minute remedial... but i alrdy told bro that we meeting after sch le.. so i decided to pon remedial... told tcher i had something on.... i told him i will make up tmr... and when i thought everything was alrite... things went totally rong... haiz.. veryvery pissed... agitated... and tired.... i hope tmr or friday wun be so bad...
14 July 2009
Haiz... my hopes are dashed... teacher said 3 ppl pass eng.. 4 or 5 ppl chem and maths.... phys and econs no news... im part of the majority... and proud of it... LOL!!! JKJK im not proud of breaking my failing streak... never have i once failed all my subjects... and better not now!!!
haiz... i duno why i cant conc in class today... i kept thinking about one thing... its like.... u really love someone... that person is very close to u like a family... u treat that person as a family.... but that person doesnt treat u like one... that person dun trust u... though you put all your trust on that person... you want to get closer to that person... to help share that persons probs... and that persons sadness... but that person dun trust u... and therefore that person duwan to be close to you... den that person cannot share his troubles and probs with you.... den u feel frustrated.... cos you can only sit at one corner and watch that person suffering... that how im feeling now.... all i just wan is to help bear the burden and probs of that person.... but that person duwan let me close.... haiz....
"I will never let you fall.... I'll stand up with you forever.... I'll be there for you through it all.... Even if saving you send me into heaven...."
"Wish that I could cry Fall upon my knees Find a way to lie About a home I'll never see
It may sound absurd...but don't be naive Even heroes have the right to bleed I may be disturbed...but won't you concede Even heroes have the right to dream It's not easy to be me......."
im feeling very miserable.... i really duno what to do... im just sitting at a corner watching you suffer... and i cant do a fuck about it.... i just wish i could do something.... but i cant....
13 July 2009
first day of the new time table.... oh well... nth much... got back maths... its terrible... did badly... i dun think i should reveal my marks... well had bball during break time just now... so tyco.... from mid court... i one hand on phone.. the other hand i just trew the ball den chop.... lol... cos didi called me so many times during sch.. i think he misses me... ok im jking... he call to discuss some plans....wrong timing though lol... anyway i was feeling down... so i went to meet him after school... felt better though... now im watching incredi tales with him.... lol and both of us are like screaming over the phone?? ok im preety freaked out now... thkx to didi scaring me... and some self scare... i nid hugs!! ahh!!! lol didi pei me dreamland =p
12 July 2009
Haiz this new time table sux... its just as sucky as the old one... this time much worse... no more early fridays... PE change to GP... i rather go for PE... and the bad thing is... the days i finish school early... didi got cca =( and the days he free i end at 5.... damn it... haiz... i guess we just have to make do with meeting after his CCA lor... AHH!!! im feeling pissed... sis went MIA whole day... duno wad happen to her... she din even sms or call or reply.... haiz... im getting worried... i dun have her hse phone =( haiz... im feeling the usual monday blues again... well at least this time its better... i have didi to help calm me down...
11 July 2009
I know its too late to say this... i know you will nev trust me anymore... after how i have hurt you... i just wana say that i love you... im sorry for all the things that i have done... i know it must have hurt you alot... and i know that no matter how many times i apologise... things can nev be the same again... i wana say again.... that i really love you alot... i dont know how you treat me... but to me... i treat you more than a friend.. to me... you are like part of a family... you do realise that b4 all these happened... i dun call you by your name? and the title that i gave you... was how much you meant to me... although now i dun call you that anymore... to me i still wana treat you like one... im too ashamed to call you that anymore... because i know that im not worthy to do that.. ive not done a good job... and im sorry for that... i know i have broken a few promises... i promised nev to let you fall.. i promised to be there for you forever... but i myself have hurt you without myself knowing it.... its something i cant forgive myself about.... you have done so much for me... but i cant even do a simple thing for you... you kept my spirits up when im down... you gave me a new meaning in life... you kept me from looking back at the past... you reminded me what love is all about... youve changed me... but i couldnt even hold on to such a simple promise... all i just want is for you to give me one more chance... to trust me again... to let me love you again.... and let me hold on back to my promises i have once failed to keep... ='(
i miss eeu..... i miss eeu.... i miss eeu.... i miss eeu.... haiz... why must things turn out like that? =(
im feeling much better now... didi finally called me... cheered me up alot... cos he last nite super tired so slp at 9+... lol... so he din called last nite... den previous nite his mum bday he duwan make her angry so bo call oso.. missed him too.. den he suddenly call when i eating dinner... lol... funny he always call when im eating.... i was actually starting to get worried he din call me for so long xia... haha im feeling much better now... thkx didi i love you =p
10 July 2009
ok today was fast... had some stupid principal tok for an hour... den go take class photo.. den eat free ice cream sponsred by principal for youth day... den survey and home.... damned the class photo.. they brought doggy soft toys lol.. say wan standout? wth... den some use the dogs to hump each other and some obscene actions.. omg...nevertheless im mapling now cya..
ok here i am mapling and watching this show called Australia... not bad a show...quite nice... story and plot was nice.. though its meant for some lovelove story... the story was fantastic... even when i thought that the show is ending.. its just half way... and lots of twists...
9 July 2009
OMG!!! finished last paper!!! im free!!! haha... today supposed meet sis and bro go watch dvd de... in the end... i went to Alica's hse... went for lunch at hgm... met eugene and jonathan... alica said she go buy cake for her mum bday... so after that i went her hse... watching dvd and playing my lappy there... nth much today... just dead tired... finally can have a good rest... haha... supposed to meet maggy tmr... not sure if i still can...
8 July 2009
ok i finished my chem... terrible paper 1 though... left 30 mins and im still at questin 10 out of 40!! but i finished it though.. haha... today didi suddenly say can meet... but i told him tmr lar.. cos i duwan everyday meet... my mum will kill me... and so im at home.. mostly using the com the whole day... ohya and i bought the dvd for didi le... the title is "back to school" and i bought another one called "australia" im looking forward to tmr... last paper for my mid year... and should be going out tmr.. not sure going where... think i meet didi den say bah... but sis say maybe wan go watch dvd cos she buy 4 new shows haven watch... not sure lar... lata den decide lor...
oma! im so freaking pissed... i dun feel like caring liao...
to another person... haiz.. ur pesterings haven stopped... u know uve got me super dissappointed.. u expect me to treat u like a friend.. but the fact is... have u ever treated me like one? i wanted to trust u... but u proved that u have made me lose my trust twice... if u wana gain back my trust... its possible but its gona be hard... i wana get close to u... but the way u are treating me is stopping me from trying to get close... u know why i can get close to other people easily... but i cant hang out well with you? its becos everytime we tok... u say things that put a full-stop to our conversation. u do things that make me lose my feel. thats why i dun even feel like being with u... if u wan me to treat u good... at least make me feel at peace and make me feel happy going out with u. make me feel that i look forward to go out with u. not look forward to go home or hang up on you.. u know why people dun feel like being with you? one reason is that u shoot vulgarities like almost every sentence. whether u are happy or pissed. its still the same. when u get pissed u use even more. so now do u know why so many people dun wana be with you? its not about being scared of you. theres nth scary at all. they just dun like people to stereotype them becos they are mixing with someone using vulagrities everytime. using vulgarities doesnt make u seem matured or man-like. excess use of it will even make u look imatured and childish. just take note of that. the reason why im still trying to call u a "friend" is cos i feel that theres still hope for u... pls dun let me down again... for i feel that im about to hit my limits...
7 July 2009
ok i just finished my maths.... ok it sux.. seriously screwed... oh well... im not home... waiting for ahboi finish sch... he today no band... sis say she bought donuts for us from msia wor... hehe... my favs =p ok im gona meet them for lunch lata on.. time to maple ^^
ok i met bro after his sch... went for lunch and walk at hgm... den went to sis hse bustop wait for her... jy was there too.. sis came... den we went back hgm walkwalk... den took bus to mss there... but time running out le... so me and bro take bus home... alot things happen lar... see C:\Rain\~Cu73R41ny~\Blogstuff\My Blog\7 July 2009
6 July 2009
"Love deeply and passionately. You might get hurt but it's the only way to live life completely" i read this somewhere in my email....
well today jy said its the last day she can go out... so didi say we should go meet her... din slp much ytd... all thkx to elizabeth bathory.. woke up at 730... played maple... didi went to jy hse.... den we met at 930... breakfast at mac... den went arcade.... played some gun game with bro... den we played the aeroplane game... aiya i duno wads the name lar... anyways... had alot of fun... didi tried to help me kiap the tigger... but cannot leh.. sian... walkwalk around the mall.. den went library... bro using my lappy... den we went to lunch at kfc... after that all went home.. bro ask me pei him... cos he scared take rong bus... stupid excuse lor... he knows the bus go there de... so yeah in the end i got scolded cos i reached home late... more things happened see C:\Rain\~Cu73R41ny~\Blogstuff\My Blog\6 July 2009
5 July 2009
haha watching xformers for the second time... cos im so bored and i duwan stay at home.... this time i watching with my parents and yungwai didi... lol... though me and didi are like in diff country... 42km apart.... lawls... just pretending that we are sitting beside each other =p haha luv u didi <3
ok a little small setback in the morning... nontheless went for the movie.... though its already the second time im watching.... it somehow still feels nice.... haha... especially when u have someone 50km away thinking of you? lol... hahas... ok i went to otaku house.... bought mokona and modoki plushie... wanted both large sizes... but the mokona only left the last med.... so i bought mokona med and modoki large... cost 65$... but dads buying it so... who cares? haha... ok im feeling much better now.... much better than ytd.... prob cos got didi msn me the whole morn.... though someone is still being annoying... yeah... well... the calls haven stopped... im wondering if this plan is gona work... haiz.... i dun think he reads this? or maybe he havent got the jidst of wad im toking about... oh well.... maybe i should just tok to him face to face... argh! i duno lar... i dun feel like caring liao... veryvery tired.... i just wish he will just stop that nonsense bah...
im watching war of the worlds on tv with ahboi haha.... den we also watch incredible tales... lol he dun dare watch alone so he called me to tok and watch.. lol...
4 July 2009
ok today i din study much... wasnt keen on doing that... haha... today alot of things happen... firstly... ahboi called me in the morn... he say he at his mum office lol... den we chat abit... went for lunch.... came back and slack.... went for church... den went for dinner lol... wah dinner was so fun! bro called me to chat again... me had dinner with relatives... den food was very nice oso.... wah den we chat alot crap stuff lor... like... i asked my grandfather... eh ahgong... how u and ahma pat toh(date)? den ahgong and ahma both blushing... ahgong... last time ahma very chio and sexy ar? more blushes.... ahgong.. ahma last time neh jing dua hor(ahma have big boobs)? wah seriously lor... we laugh till damn hard lar... den my cousin came... den i asked him... eh your gf how ar? she msian? got mango plantation mar? bigbig mango? wah den we kept laughing... eh she know how cook ar? her favourite dish is tofu rite? lol! den she give you mango for desert? ahha!! omg we were like damn sick and disgusting... i cant stop laughing when i asked how ahgong and ahma date lor... they so shy dun even dare say anything... ahgong just smile and eat dinner... ahma keep saying she forget.... den keep arhm chio...
now im home... talking to ahboi... and watching korean drama... omg this guy damn sweet... he go stay at her gf hse... so funny! den the gf got a bro... damn cute xia... and the bf damn funny lor.. keep acting cool xia... and the bro seriously damn funny lor... eee!!! haha! den she oso very funny lar... her expression reminds me of someone... the blurblur look! lol!! rite sis? =p omg!! i feel so envious lar... why sg bo such romantic places de.... eee... omgomgomg.... haiz... ice skating under nite sky... omgomgomg!!!! haiz... i miss you ='(
ee!! i wana buy new phone!! LG arena!! both me and didi eyeing it xia... omg its seriously very cool... i got a feeling that if i buy didi cfm ask to borrow it one day de lor... like wad he did to my ipod =p but too bad both of us just like had new phones not long... sianz... no contract to buy new phone.. AHH!!! anyone kind enough to buy me one? =X
ok im super tired... tired of being the nice guy... tired of everthing... things cant keep going out the way you want it to be... you cant keep thinking about yourself and want everything for yourself... ive told you le.... stop coming to me and vent your anger on me... im not a stress ball or a punch bag... i have my own probs... if u nid my help.... i will certainly help u de... but dun keep ranting things to me again and again... im sick of the same things repeating over and over again... complaining non stop and not doing anything about it wun do you any help... and you should know that im too lazy to bother about anything else.... anything that doesnt concern me... i wun zi dong de... if you need help just say it... dun keep trying to hint.... though i know what you are aiming... of cos i know.. i can read your mind and actions easily enough.. i will pretend nth happened... and i wun bother to do anything at all... im in the midst of exam... im trying to study hard... i wana keep up to my promises i made to 2 person... i need to do well for my exams... i have many other probs on hold... i cant keep helping you all the time... you cant hang on to me all the time too... i need my own space... ive tried my best to keep my cool... now your one step off the limit liao.. its not my fault i cant be with you all the time... i have my own life... so do you... i kept telling you that... but you wun listen... you still carry on doing what you think is good for you... but to me... its very irritating... i shall repeat again... i never like to poke my nose into people's asses... and i never will... so dun expect me to be auto... dun expect me to be wad you think i should be... one last thing.... i dun like attention seekers... whenever someone seeks attention... i will do the thing i do best at... pretend nth happened...
to everyone else ar... i must aplogise wor.... im damndamndamn vexed now.... by the time you read this leh.. i think im slping le.... im very tired... if i cant be with you these few days... i apologise wor... im trying my best to accomodate for everyone.... but someones been trying to buy my time wor... haiz... im tired and duno wad to do xia... *yawns *hug tigger! *snorezzzz
3 July 2009
today wasnt a perfect day.... but i went ahead nontheless... firstly... physics was much easier than expected.... headed home for a bit of maple... den went to meet eugene and the rest.... at first the plan was me eugene and sis and jy.... sis say need somewhere peaceful... i needed somewhere to breathe.... so decided pasir ris park... den sis asked alvin come... den i sms jonathan... but i think he saw the msg after eugene asked him to folo us... den jy ask liping along... den liping brought her bf... well supposed to meet at 1230 and lunch... but i was the only one eating.... met sis on the bus... was trying to call her when she shouted at me in front of me lol... she got up the same bus as me... jy was late.... she went back to change.. liping was late for 2 hr... we waited for like 1hr+ b4 she asked us to go ahead first... reached there at 2+ me sis and eugene walked to the water breaker 12.... on the way we went to playground play swing... jonathan alvin and sotong rented bikes... i sat there playing flute.. den eugene ask me pei him go play... den sis emo there... so i dragged her down too... jonathan and alvin go pick liping and edwin... den the day went on... they left at 5+... i stayed on... cos dad lata come pick me and we go diner... today wasnt a very happy though... saw alot of people they give me unhappy thoughts...
hey thanks for sticking with me... im sry that i caused so much probs for u... i just hope that our friendship can cont... and get better
2 July 2009
screw chem... ahh!!!! screw physics tmr too!!!
wah the foodcourt totally screwed up lar.. i oredered 2 egg prata... they gave me 2 kosong.... just like ytd chicken chop.. screwed up lol...
went for dinner at swensons at 4pm lol... cos got offer buy 1 get 1 free... and it ends at 5... so... early dinner lol... i ate chicken baked rice, creamy pasta... lol.... anyone care for seconds? ^^
im just counting down to doomsday... maybe i should just write my name and submit a blank paper lol...
cant wait for 10am... im gona feel so much less stressed after 10am... haha... and thankfully didi and sis and sotong agreed to pei me... not sure where we going... maybe to the beach? idk... sis and I need some fresh air.... nid some space and time to breathe...
1 July 2009
omg... today maths... CMI... wun say very bad lar... wun say too good either... i think able to pass... cao didi... today ask me bring laptop find him.... i at first wan study but he say nid laptop for work... so no choice go find him... after sch i came home... found out no key... tio locked out... went to foodcourt buy food.. i order chicken chop duwan fries change to coleslaw... add rice... the auntie handed me the plastic bag... den i go off... when i eating... i realised she gave me two packs... lol... thought of keeping one pack for didi lata... but i wasnt hungry... wasnt full either... so i ate both packs up... =) anyways when i went to pick didi up.... waited quite long... cos he kena held back by teacher.. lol.. den when he met me... i was like ok now wad? he replied... eh actualy hor i already finish the work.. me: wah den u ask me come out for wad? didi: for fun... ask you come out hang out mar... lol lar him.. crazy idiot... lucky tmr is chem.. one of my stronger subject... haha... so just now i was studying.. and playing bball with him and his frends... lalalas...
30 June 2009
no sch today.... im bored... lol... supposed to be studying... but i guess i will be using the com first haha....
omg!!! stressed!!! fucking stressed!!! fuckinfuckinfucking stressed!!! wah cao exam... i was like doing maths questions just now.... and i totally forgot everything ar!!!! walao!!! im so freaking pissed!!! i just feel like opening the window and scream!!!! den lata people say i xiao lol... and den i felt like tearing all my paper into bits!!! walao sooner or lata i going imh le lar.... my hse... block B ward 4D.... 4A is for sis... 4c for bro... 4A for didi? lol...
29 June 2009
had my first paper... Quite ok lar... I thot I was going to die... Lucky I read a similar question last nite... So more or less prepared... Anyways... Supposed to play bball with bro just now... Den I wait so long for him... He SMS me... Come Pcc... I was like... Wth? Den sis call me say bro waiting for us at punggol cc... Lol lar... Stupid sicko... Anyways played till 3? Den me and bro and sis went sotong hse... Teaching liping chem... And cheering sis up... Disturbing sotong... And became a punchbag for bro... Crapped till 5+++ took sis and bro home.. Came home and found that mum took out my Internet adapter... Heng got lappy... And I'm currently msning n blogging on my podpod... Lucky Sis return me Liao.... If not no more msn... Hahas...
28 June 2009
wow... so todays the last day of school hols... lets see... what happened during the hols... i made a new friend/sis... i had a new bro.... i made a new friend who is from overseas... i forged a greater bond with some of my friends.... reforged bonds that have been broken.... broke bonds with some... caused some problems here and there... made people sad... helped solve lots of probs... made people happy... studied for my mid year =) much more prepared den my block test... been a bad boy =X as well as a good boy =p played lots of maple too... and regained lots of my old maple friends... overall i feel that im a much happier person... and i feel much free... no longer that emo lonely self... and i do have more people i can share my love with ^^ although im already contented with what i have... i just wish you could still be here beside me =/ oh well good luck for all those who are having exams tmr!
eeeek! i was looking thru my photo albums... i saw a small cute chubby boy xia... thats me! lol... i look like so different now... last time my hair... looks like giddy when he was sec 1 lol... and i looked so puny lar.... den i just rmb that me and my cousin last time very close... keep going each other hse.... den we used to wear the same shirt everytime we go out tgt de... our fav mickeymouse shirt =p and my gosh.... gave alot of memories haha... but although his hair still remains the same... he looked diff liao... hehe... and den i saw my pri 5 photos at perth... omg.. i cant even recongise myself... i was like.. am i the camera man? my mum was like... no? you pajiao ar? thats you... *points* lol!! and i rmb my good friend in pri sch haha... i din know i have a pic of him and me sei... shd send him one day.... i wonder how he looks like liao... so long nev see him... and den theres a few of them that are still in my sch now... managed to have a pic of my kor when he was still... small sized? haha... and a few pics of my other teachers as well... haha...
27 May 2009
hehe today leh... nth much.. study study and more study... exams on monday... so yeah i guess i wun be going out till 9 july! ahhhh....
26 May 2009
aiyoi... today very complicated... supposed to go cut hair... but sis and sotong not ready... so i went to cut den they come join me... den bro kept calling ask where we are... lol... so we went to bro's hse... suppose to play majong... but sotong and sis not interested... so no choice persuaded sotong to play... in the end is bro help her play... lol... den bro's frend play oso... so got 4 players lor... den play 1 round... we had to go... went to the kopitiam to eat... stupid kopitiam... that time cannot find... heng not found liao.. at second floor lol... bro and his frend play basketball.. den i found out my wallet left at his hse... so i had to go up and take my wallet... and i found out i left my ipod with sis.. so shes passing it back to me tonite... haha... but today very sian though...
u know what? you're just an imbecile windbag.... stop littering my tagbox to act big... you are still 5 years too early to play on the same table... go back brush up on your language before coming back again... or maybe just go home and cuddle in your cradle looking for your barbie... and to the other dodo geek.... stop trying to act as if you are a more than matured superman trying to "stop people from having their ambitions"... you are just plain scrying on how to do things to your advantage... so i am a paedophile trying to befriend small little boys eh? so please explain the terms sotong and kor and jie and sis... stunned that you cant say anything? or are u still frivolously running around trying to find loop holes again? or maybe you are just trying to hook up another devious plan? dun worry but your attempts wun succeed. i may look like a tamed nerd who doesnt hurt a fly. but if you wana take things up i have plenty of neurons to spare. i just hope you have enough of those proteins to throw. because when i do things. i plan at least 5 steps ahead. so now wad? trying to tell everyone that im gay cos i go around mixing with guys of younger age? arent you doing the same rite now? going to them? and how wrong. i mix with people of all ages. and what else? becos i say i love you to another guy? so if if your dad says i love you to you. his gay? and if your sis says that to your mum. shes les? oh well sry to say but i use those words to all my loved ones male or female. and hugging someone of the same sex means that you are homosexual? oh lets see so if your best frend hugs you, you and him are couples eh? lets see what other arguments u can come up with. oh and i almost forgot. you shouldnt let a paedophile run lose in the streets. why not catch him? o.0? got evidence eh? u have pictures that someone groped a small kid? or touched him elsewhere? or the kid did a felatio for him? so if you dun have any evidence it is called defaming and accusing.
25 May 2009
ok today was a complete mess... im suppose to finish studying maths by today... and go bro's hse mahjong with sotong and sis... den go lan with jonathan eugene dennnis ryan and jm... complete screw up... bro last minute say his mum on half day cant go his hse... at the same time... my dad called to say his coming back on half day... argh!!! so today i can only study and study.... so bored...
wow so in the end bro run away and lan with the rest... sotong at home cooking? sis with frends? lol...
you lift my feet of the ground. you spin me around. you make me crazier crazier... aiyoi i duno why suddenly keep hearing this song... den i go change lyrics... you spin me around. make me dizzier giddier... till i fall to the long kao ^^
eh peeps urh... i duno why hor... some people complain i del tag very hum leh... den duno when kind souls help me tag back hor... he no balls go del oso leh... aiyoi... den hor some people gei kiang wan act like my pei bu siol... act like a balless dad and a buttless mum... those who got folo tagbox de u shd know lar hor... dun wry nia... start with 220 de means singtel... call singtel up oso know who it is liao... not bad lar... actually i call is oso double confirm nia... very long oso guess who is that liao... only one such wu liao person will be so crippled to come tag nia... nincompoops. wad dodos i have playing with my tag box...
omg! bro went to cut hair without miie!!!! sianz. i thot tmr he go cut. den i oso go cut. now tmr i go cut. den no one peiis me cut-o!!!! nvm lor... tmr i drag sis pei me cutcut.... den we go bro hse? or maybe sotong de.. haven decide lar... aiyoi... scared is my dad and bro's mum on leave again... nvm tmr i wana take a pic with our new hair!!! haha... maybe pai with sotong and sis oso... cos i bo pai with them b4... hehe...
btw.... i think i really scared some people last nite... she had a nightmare of ganush xia.. ganush kept saying " i will be waiting for you" omg! if its me i sure freak out lor... lol... its damn disgusting lar....
What is your True Fear?
Your Result: Losing Someone
You love affection and the people in your life more than anything. Your greatest fear is that one day someone you care about won't be there anymore. You are a very friendly and inviting person, who draws in a lot of friendships with your kind, considerate, and loyal nature. However, deep down you are slightly insecure and unsure of yourself. You couldn't deal with it if you didn't have one of your loved ones in your life anymore. You don't have too much to worry about though, because with a friend like you, no one will want to lose you either!
lol... guess its quite true... but dun wry... alot of loved ones now... and i wun lose any of them liao... im not as stupid as i were...
24 May 2009
Hoho today was purrfect! missoon was accomplished... was too pissed last nite... din know to book the tics or not... but decided to take a small risk this morn... so here it goes... didi came my hse at 930... i told him to wait below cos i bathing and changing and stuff... met him at 10am... went to sotong hse there... sis and sotong at there... waited a while den we cab down to kovan mrt... they lazy take bus or walk there.... chiong mrt to PS.... was almost late.... rush buy tics... den went in... din buy any poppies... but i stole didi's coke haha... stupid drag me to hell... really scared me to hell.. been hugging my bag and screaming like some fk lol... den sotong cried lol... den sis sat beside me... she holding on to didi's hand.. lol... i kept trying to scare her... succeeded once haha... stupid ganush.... so sick lar... vomit maggots... vomit "green tea"(lol jonathan said it was green tea) and the eyeball flew out into someones mouth... omg this show is so disgusting!!! yickes!!! i almost puked lor... heng i nev eat anything b4 the show... den after the show... bro lar... so naughty... scare me when i in toilet leh... haha... so jonathan was smsing me half the time i was in the movie... spoiler!!! sis!!! tell me the last part xia!!! ta ma dii!!!! "You shamed me! I begged you but you shamed me!" "Soon it will be you who comes begging for me!!!" walao dam scary lar... i just wish got someone to hug just now xia lol... lol... den we went to find jonathan... he in arcade... we both playing jubeat.... and he played drumania... i asked him to lend me try an easy last song... den stupid bro lor... go disturb me... den fail the song... lol... so pathetic... anyways we walked around Ps slacking... den alvin came to find us... just nice times up again... and we went in for our second movie... transformers was nice! serious... maybe its cos i chose the best seats to stack with the surround system? got many new chars in the movie... alot of touch ups on the new char... prime looks dam cool when he got revived... his canon dam shiok... and yeah not a bad show... was seating beside didi and alvin during this show... suppose to sit with sis... but alvin duwan seat corner =.= ok den after show alvin pangseh us... the rest went to eat... looked at ajisen... price too ex... so we went to the cheaper-skate restraunt... aji-tei.... beside ajisen... ordered pork cheese cutlet... and baked curry rice? not bad... den after that supposed to go sotong hse slack a while.. we pretended to zao... he hide while i take bag cover... den sis saw and screamed lol... den after that bro mum called him... so he cant go... and he deliberately dragged me away so i cant get up the bus with sis and sotong.. well so i delivered bro back to his hse.. and so i went home =) ok so mission accomplished... 3 people toking again... another 3 oso ok le ^^ hehe sis careful tonite ar!!! slp that time rmb scotchtape your mouth... and dun turn behind!!! ahha!!!!
well u know what? i just found out something... what matters in your life aint happiness... happiness cant be satisfied... but love can.... love can always bring you happiness... yeah... thats why i wanted to lead a love life... love isnt just about boy and girl thingy... it can mean friends... family and stuff... once u experience love... u will feel that you are forever in bliss... yes i mean it... i dun hate people... becos whenever theres hatred theres hurt and pain... i just wana love others... is there anything wrong with that? cant frends love one another and care for each other?
23 June 2009
so lets see wad i did today... woke up and started mapling... den study.... not intending to go out anyways... after lunch didi suddenly called me... ask me go his hse mahjong... den he ask sotong and sis go... but sotong cant go out... so sis went her hse... den since i duwan didi to feel leftout... so i went his side lor... sry sotong... is not purposely wan pangseh u all de... i hope u can unds... i duwan ah boi to feel lonely cos he cant meet with us.... ok so we played mahjong... i din know 2 person can play xia... den we play a while... den he got facinated over my iTouch lol... he ar.... anything new oso wan take xia.... i was watching mr bean on his Tv haha.. very funny!! kept laughing... and then his sis and her frend came... so we 4 played mahjong.. didi dam bad lar... he purposely duwan let me win... he know which card i waiting for.. den he purposely keep... den when i throw my card... he threw the one i wanted.. bastard xia... haha... anyways had great fun.... mostly got owned by him though... he said he wana win me till i lose everything... too bad i had to go off.... maybe lets do it during our year end chalet k? haha.. yaya i know u cant wait for tmr to cme... so do i haha... love you...
wah at first teacher call me... i thot she wan tell me sch hols extended siol!! sianz its a false alarm... she just asked if i went overseas this hols.. i wanted to tell her i went mexico =X
ok so heres the plan for tmr... we have changed the schedule... this is the final edition le... first those watching drag me to hell shall meet at plaza sing at 1030am... the show is at 11am... and bro u can come and wake me up from my bed pl0x =0 show shd end at about 1pm... so we go lunch... after lunch we watch 2.30pm transformers... all those not watching DMTH can join us at 1pm... well actually i guess the only ones going are like... me... bro.. sis... sotong... and jonathan? ryan cant go out... nick cant go.... jm duwan go... shadow got bowling session.... maggy pangseh me =( so left 5 of us lor...
argh... fk.... i dun know wads going on... today just totally sux... i help to solve one thing... another thing appear... this whole thingy is in an absolute mess...
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i know im naive... im too simple... and i trust people too easily... maybe thats who i am... all i just ask is for you to forgive me of what i did to you in the past... i know im stupid and crazy to have hurt u.... i did promise not to let you fall... and of cos to be at your side at all times... but i couldnt uphold that... i really treasure this relationship with you... i hope that u can give me one more chance to be frends once again... i know that you won't trust me anymore.. but i hope to change both of us... so that we can be close once again...
Though our faces never met... but our destinies hath join yet... A thousand days i shall wait... for that century longing fate... But one day you shall see.... i will bring you out to sea... and your heart shall feel.... all i have to give to you....
21 June 2009
oh crap i forgot friday got movie screening in church xia.. sianz.... anwyays today went to watch ghosts of girlfrends past... stupid show... make me cry.... haiz... been thinking of someone again... anyways nth much today... after movie i went for lunch at manhattan's fish market.. not bad xia the food... the garlic rice very fragrant.... the fish oso not bad... den went to walkwalk a while den went ahma hse... dam the toilet bowl got stuck again... heave diarrhoea again... and im sneezing badly... aiyo didi stop sneezing lar =X
20 June 2009
wah today sibei wuliao lor... i drew two lame stuff.... ____ / @ @ \ <=== say hi to sotong (u shd know whos this) \__0__/ ////\\\\
( )( ) (o.o ) <---------- *bang* ===== @ ( U U )o \\
( )( ) (o.o ) <---------- ===== @ ( U U )o \\
( ) ( ) (o . o )<---------- ===== @ ( U U )o \\
lol oversized bunny.. looks much better on msn....
ok today whole day chatting with sotong sis and didi... lol dam funny lar... we keep laughing... trying to recall and fill sotong about wad happened last week.... didi's first question to sotong was... do u have swine flu? lol...sotong sommore in plane keep sneezing wear mask sommore... den everyone must be staring.... and wondering... wad a wierd sotong... how come a sotong can sneeze de ^^ anyways... i think im down with flu... so is didi and sis.... lol... hope nth goes wrong... maybe we can scare the authorities into closing sch? haha... den got extended hols... =p den sotong showed us this website... click here "The woman claimed she then cut off his penis with a craft knife and flushed it down the toilet bowl" eeew... does that mean it will flow to the sewage thru the longkao? "She suffered from depression and had suspected her younger husband of having an affair" does this mean she have another older husband? lol... den i drew this pic again O C=== X ==== 0 0 O
*snipsnip*
ahha!!!! ok its like so sick....
didi ar stop sneezing can? zz now i keep sneezing liao lar.. see lar...
ok its so stupid... pr say today got YAG(youth asian games) opening he must go... go to sch... bo lang... mistake is next week lol!!!
today been chatting with sis sotong and bro... chat till very nice lar... been laughing and crapping whole day.. damn funny... we oso planning alot things lor... like EOY go open chalet.... celebrate bro mine and maybe jonathan bday? den i maybe going america for 2 weeks+++ oopsie sis gona kill me haha... i will miss u all alot leh laidat... maybe i DHL or fedex u all over =p anyways should be going on shopping spree lar haha..
ok tmr should be going watch movie... ghost of girlfrends past and land of the lost? not very sure... i go slp le haha...
19 June 2009
0.o today got 3 people coming back sg... laopei... ahma and relatives...sotong lol.... nth much... just chatting with sis and bro whole day...
18 June 2009
nth much today... just that i was studying and mapling again... eugene was at frend hse... sis slp till 2pm den went out... so im home alone...
didi called me at 9+ xia... den sis oso call... she jio me go out eat at chompchomp... mum say cannot.... den i say wan go jalan kayu eat prata... she say i xiao... sobs.... hungwee worx....
17 June 2009
Ok cant slp.... i toked to sis till 130am... den i smsed didi... he said he haven slp too lol...
woke up by didi's call at 8am... apparently becos i din reply his sms at 645am? lol...idiot xia... so early... i said reach my hse den call me... he call me when he wake up... anyways he came up my hse... but since he bo trunks... i decided to lend him my bikini? ahhha... ok just kiddin... i lend him try all my trunks... too bad all too big for him... so we din swim lor.... just slacked below... i brought breakfast down to share with him.... he lar walao... cause a small water fight... now both wet le... den we cont slack at playground.... nice lor i good to him bring one bottle of water... he empty it at my shoe... and the can of green tea all over my face... guess wad i had to go pu and bathe and change clothes twice... sis just came.... den eugene and sis went to LJS to blow aircon... i came up to bathe the second time... going down le haha... having lunch with nick jm piggy jonathan alvin ryan bro and sis... den go lan afterwards... haha... ok got to blast! cya =p
back le... they still there though... had to get back.... mum say home by 3... i 3 den left there... met her on the bus... and i went OMG!! anyways was playing CS dota and l4d..... ok compared to jonathan i suck alot... im not at FPS games lar... dota i played lich.... i got 1 kill 2 assist 0 or 1 death... me and jonathan owned piggy and jm lol... i dun like 2v2... my lich cannot CF alot people... i prefer 5v5 haha.... ok anyways... i left after the 2 hours lor.. now at home...
more info pls go to C:\Rain\~Cu73Ra1ny~\Blogstuff\My Blog\17 june 2009
16 June 2009
ok so for the past few days it was just studying and mapling... dam sian... but of cos sis and didi called to chat lar... anyways i started a wind breaker.... now lev 33 liao haha.... ok cant wait for tmr xia.... haha didi coming my hse swim.... after that we go meet the other people go lan...
15 June 2009
ahha i guess im the first to wake up... big sis and bro nev reply leh... think they still slping... small sis should have reached japan by now... lalalals....
sianz today didi say wan come my hse swim... den mum dun allow... so ive been dotaling and studying the whole of today... funny xia lunch time... suppose to take the shuttle service to punggol... who knows the route has changed... so guess wad? i took one round back home... lol...
big sis going msia for 1 hour lawls!!! eat dinner and back? ahhha!!!
14 June 2009
ok im getting irritated liao... firstly i went to get my specs from the optician... den my ahma say wan go visit my cousin a while... now i come back home... mum scold say why i go out... wth lar... you ask me go out with them... now u scold me.... den they go up their hse 15min only u scold me... so u say i can only go take specs and eat then come home lar? anywhere else oso need call u? so i go toilet oso must ask ar? wah piang eh...
ok everythings seems much better after church.... didi called me at 7pm lol... crapped alot lar he... big sis oso on the phone.... small sis alrdy in airport so she called using mum hp... when small sis not around hor we kept laughing lar... den everytime small sis come den no one crap le lol... stupid bro lor... make me laugh till like shit.... keep saying want to tok to whoever beside me on the phone... say wad i love them lol... from my mum to casher to security guard? lol lar him... crazy xia... den suddenly start singing the cookie jar thing... den i say u wan bikini so much next time your bday we buy you one... den you wear that go out with us k? lawls... we started singing songs again... den the jj de hui you na me yi tian... stupid bro intro me... den we sing liao i started crying.... lol... ting niao er ga chang de sheng ying... ting wo shuo sheng i love you <3 haha... ok lar nth much lor... we just crapped all the way till 1am.... den i pei sis maple a while den i slp le...
13 June 2009
oh well not supposed to go out today... but i wanted to go library study de... aiya... den duno lar... bro wan me go find him... but so sad... i wana go liao he say cant meet =.= den something happened... big sis very upset... so we went to newyorknewyork eat... den small sis got tuition zz... waited for her to finish den we start eating... ate the spaghetti carbonara... omg im so into that creamy food nowadays... felt so high after taking it lar lol... den sis de bf treat us choc fondue ^^ den suppose go home.. but small sis ask me go her hse... den halfway mum call... she scold me... den i went home... on the way home... i felt dam stressed... suddenly all the study and exam and stuff came back... den i started feeling down again.. almost broke down bah... den go home... mum started screaming... so i went to the toilet lor... den i sort of turn on the shower and broke down... bro called after my shower... really cheer me up alot... he lar... xiao lang xia... keep saying all the funny stuff... den i from ='( become =) again haha... thkx bro =p luv u haha... thkx sis for the encouragement too =) dun get so pissed off over some people k? some people really dun appreciate what you do for them de.... anyways i dun think i can go out anymore liao.... need to study for exams.... small sis take care wor.. have a safe trip ^^
haiz i duno wads wrong lar... ive been trying to study... but you keep thinking im not... den you keep nagging... but u must know that your nagging only make me more stressed.... the reason why i go out to study is so that i wun get distracted by the com... haiz... nvm.... i just realise that parents can sometimes be so stubborn...
12 June 2009
ok let me repeat again for all those who may have mistaken ok? whatever happened previously has already settled. theres no free show or wad. my intention is to clear the misunderstanding that happened. somehow i heard some funny things that mrs chua claimed did not happen. and she heard funny things that i didnt even do. so she said it was a misunderstanding liao. im not here to find fault or probs with conductors. and obviously im NOT here to get them SACKED OR FIRED. i dun know where some of you heard stories or half views. but mrs chua has already said everything is clear liao. she said that there wasnt any forced intrusion into personal life of students. nor is there any thing about getting between my frends and i. she sompa to me that day liao. we got witness there. so i hope this clears things.
to all those who are dragged into this issue. just to let you know that everythings ok le. and sry for causing those trouble for you.
to mrs chua and ms ong thkx for helping settle this prob peacefully. to the other two conductors. i don't know what kind of rumours you may have heard. or what kind of opinions you heard from others. but i do hope that in future pls listen from both sides of the stories before doing anything. i too must apologise if i said anything insensitive in my previous posts. i hope that this issue does not affect anything between us. if you still have any doubts about me you are free to tok to me directly. and if you wana tok to me directly. i hope we can tok peacefully without any raised voices and shoutings.
to this person who blatantly thought that he has played with peoples life enough. if you think you did something marvelous to try and come between me and my frends. well this is to show that u haven done nothing at all. you have just created a mess that needed other people to clean up for you. and it obviosuly shows your immaturity. anyways just to let you know that your attempt has failed. the usual group of us are still together. none of them believed your rumour. so pls try harder next time.
11 June 2009
wah last nite cant sleep xia... kept thinking of today... wondering how well it can go... prac din slp last nite leh... i even woke up to bathe.... den 6am i still sms bro and sis say i cant slp... bro slp the whole nite... two sis both bo slp oso lol.. officially "woke up" at 830... went to play abit of game... den study abit... went out at 10am... met sis and bro at 1030 at hougang mall... bro kept singing the dinosaur song.... "holy fuck you see... its a dinosaur..... jesus christ what the f****" lol... stupid sia... he kept playing that song lar.... went to kbox lar... paid 17.60 for singing 11 to 3... and i paid for bro too.. but i brought only 30$... so sis paid for the rest... wah i paid 17.60 just to listen to bro sing jjlin songs xia... den my song sis duwan pass me mic... den kap the song... -_-||| so i prac sit there eat lunch and drink coke and listen free entertainment lol... went to hougang mall walkwalk... bro xiao de lar... keep singing the cookie jar song.. den he change the lyrics... "i like girls and they like me... i look so good in my bikini" den i was like wth?? he kept singing xia... den suddenly become "i look so good in your underwear" "my hands my hands... i cant keep them out of your lingerie" lol!!! after that wanted to go bro house below play... den suaysuay bro mama at home... so he had to stay home... and we had to leave... sis oso sian... den we went to vin hse... play his stupid guitar hero... den a while i left le... mum call ask me dabao food xia... i persuaded her to cook.. den i wanted to sms sis "heng mum cook i bo lui... if she know i die...." duno how i press den smsed my mum instead... den i got a shocked when i recieded this "ohhh i see someone bo lui hor?" i was like wth..... anyways mum forgot wad happen haha.... now on phone with bro =p
in blog tok so big outside tio pawn? u sure who pawn who mar? go ask everyone what they see lar... ahhha.... i think is some people shout so much... one sentence enough to squash back le lor...
u wan i can say wad happen lar... ytd i went to teacher in charge... she asked me not to go to lloyd yeo... den she ask me settle directly with aw... i was discussing with a victim when aw came out... aw go there shout so much... still tell me got people complain i pester them with call.. they bo ans den i spam sms??? ahha den i said u dare u call evidence come... guess wad? when they came... they said nth of that sorts happened.... shutted his mouth up.... den he duno wad to say liao... just den chua came to tok to me... after chat le she said there was a misunderstanding... she say misunderstanding clear le... den after that i was in mss leh... i got zao off mare? u think i cant clean my own butt ar? zz u think i tok so big dun dare do things mare? still got even more things de lor...
10 June 2009
ok i guess thats the end of the nonsense... i actually wrote out a 2 page A graded english debate essay in the morn.. was wondering if i needed them.... well guess its a waste of my time lol.... came down today to mssmb.... cos i recieved even more unpleasant things last nite.... lucky mrs chua came to explain everything... it seems like they have misunderstood me... and that i may have gotten wrong info... well wadever... since things have been cleared... i find no point in dwelling further into the details that happened... just wanted to say that it was the most funny "debate/argument" i ever seen ahhha.... ok nvm... i shant say about it...
9 June 2009
alrite i feel dam happy now... just now very moody den went for a drink... den now ok le.... i called someone to settle something... everythings fine le ^^
well lets see whats the continuation. i said all i had in ytd post. but you din listen. still went ahead sommore rite? dun wry. im so scared about wad you did. im about to die... woah!!!! *piak dies ya im soooo scared. see hooww myy wooorrrds are trembling now? eh pls lar hor. got daiji with jiayi settle with her lar hor. dunnit drag people around her in de. you wan chueh daiji with me come tok to me face to face lar dunit go chueh daiji with those around me de. you may scare them. ya like threatening with posts. i know a very nice example. i think you know it too hor? "she bully your band members. but you stand there nev help. why should i give you that post?" well should i shoot that into your face again? i hope not. dun wry lar. this sch alot people i know de. actually i think the staff room and hod room got people know about it oso. somehow or rather i let loose ytd cos i dam pekcek. so well ya.... i know you are down there recording wadever i type. dun wry u can record wad u want. record and use against me lor. lets see what you can do with that. ive already said it b4. pls know your own place. you are paid to teach. not paid to be a fishmonger. so just teach and shut up about other things. you can advise people all u wan. nobody cares. and yes if nobody cares. dun go about forcing people and threatening people. well i dun give a dam actually. nth i say will go into that thick dodo of yours. and if need be. i can place the whole email out here for everyone to gaze. im not afraid to show others what u have to say about me. and to all those lame spammers. i know who you are. your ip adress very nice. and dunit ip oso know who liao. in my life only got these 2 people who are so seriously immature to do that.
attatched here is what i recieved.you say i come back disrupt practise rite? ok lor. whos the one asking me to come back play for last june concert? who came back every week to help? i teach the bassoon wrong things ar? nick teach junming thru the book de leh. i teach wrong sibo? ok lor so my name is called nick. my name is called standard of excellence. wan chueh daiji go find the right one lar.
and i can afford to buy my own instruments if i wan play. i got my own instruments to play my own stuff. no need go back beg for toys to play de.
and i say liao. syf thing. i got mc. u wan me show u mar? doctor certitfied mc with signature and chop oso got.
they will come straight to me? u sure bo? but wad i think right now is that they hiding behind dun dare come tok to me leh. they now is going one round to shoot me leh. too bad they shoot paper bullet xia. so ticklish. if im so immature as them. i should add that the bullets bounce of me and stick back to you =)
well ive got more to say. but lets say im stopping to here for the time being.
sry if i have to put names here. cos i duwan later people say i edit and peng wei. wadeva in the email is here. except the email adress. i censor for privacy.
Subject:From Mr Aw From: gavilan neo (***********@******.com) Sent: 05 June 2009 13: 43PM To: **************@*******.com
Mr Aw would like me to speak to you. about you comming to montfort band. you are most welcome to come back if you are comming to help out and teaching the juniors
however thru their observation , they saw you comming back to band just to look for some of the members and are actually distructing their sectionals or whatever ...( talking and playing with them ).
they saw you using taking their instruments and playing with their instruments onli playing with your own pieces and not using them for demotrations for the juniors. For e.g Saxophone, clarinet or flutes.
you have also been setting a bad example for them to SKIP band practices in NYJC band . For your infomation.. Mr Brando Tan have spoken to Mr Aw about you skipping your band practices in nyjcBand
due to you skipping your own band practices in nyjc you were striked off from your jc syf...
And Mr Tan questioned Mr Aw about Montfort band Member's Committment to band.. You have shown Mr Brando Tan that montfort band members have got no discipline and may cause them difficulty in using DSA to nyjc thru band in the furture.
Please be considerate And please do not skip your band practices in nyjc band and start telling band members you skipped your band practices for them... Yes you are showing them that you are a very good friend but you are on the other hand showing them that its okay and alright to skip band practices .
Mr Aw would like you to reflect on this and hope that you will not become a burden to Montfort band. You are most welcome back to Montfort band as an ALUMNI to help out. however if you repeats anything written above ... do not blame them for their straight forward since you have been warned.
i have nothing to hold against you . im just passing this msg to you since we are both alumni of mssmb , i was told to speak to you regarding this. hope you reflect upon reading my email. however if you choose to ignore their advice to you . there is nothing i can do to help .
If you have any doult to the reliablility of my Email. Always feel free to speak to Mr Aw.
Gavilan Neo .
8 June 2009
Hey mr goh and mr aw. if you are reading this. just know that im not against you or prejudiced against you. i know that you already have a bad impression of me. and i know that today i wasnt happy with what happened. firstly i feel that you are sterotyping me becos u think im a friend of jiayi. i want to tell you that it is not fair to me because of that. you quarrelled with her and you shouldnt drag her friends in. i feel this way because ever since you quarreled with her you were giving me cold looks. giving me the impression that it was my fault. and i have the impression that you are particularly prejudiced against those people around her in mssmb? correct me if i am wrong. secondly you dont have to go around spreading bad remarks about me. yes i know what you guys have been toking behind my back. you dont have to go around telling people that i am a freak who has deadly disease that everyone has to be afraid of. you are spoiling my frendship with others. how would you like that if you were in my shoes? thirdly you said that i came back to msmmb just chatting and playing peoples instruments and disrupting band? i dont deny i do talk to them. but you cant deny i did not help them. fourthly, i had my reasons for not going for nyjc band. I was feeling sick constantly and had to take mc. its not my fault i had to be sick and because of this you mark me as a bad influence? moreover i have no interest in the band there. wanted to quit long ago but i was forced to stay till syf by some contract? i am writing this here because i dun wan any more ugly things to happen. i hope to settle things properly once and for all. i am very open and if you need to speak to me about it go ahead and tok to me. please do not ask others to speak to me about it. u can msn me or call me or talk face to face to clarify things. i have no time to play immature hide and seek and backstabbing games. sorry if i came too straight to the point. i don't like to beat about the bush. so i hope to have a good talk and settle everything. thanks.
and to YOU. yes i know you are reading here. you dun have to hide or go around backstabbing and telling lies. it wont work. trust me. you have broken some of my frendships with others le. i have to thank you for that. because of that i know who are my true frends and who are not.
i today went to visit teachers... mrs quek was toking to me... told me i should be studying hard... should be constantly thinking about my loved ones... well yeah i agree with her... maybe its time for me to study hard for piggy too.... and she also asked me not to bother about small things... like dun quarrel... be a gentleman.... let small people win.... lol... i was laughing at her way of seeing things... well i think shes quite true too... i oso went around toking to the uncle and auntie who work there... they all ask me work hard for my loved ones lol...
met QL at 3+... went to mac a while.... den walk to the playground behind montfort... the place where me and you know who always went... thats when i started to think about last time... den i bought bubble tea... i told the uncle lemon suan suan.... suan till people die lol... got craving for sour stuff haha... den went to mac with piggy... lol... den walked piggy home... den went ljs.... den went out with QL to punggol park there... sent my bro back to his house... den QL tell me she coming to sengkang... thats when i realised i haven ate? lol... bro said his house there got kopitiam... couldnt find it... cos he went up le... den we went compass to eat... QL went to her auntie house... den i went home le... den laidat lor...
btw this morn i helm scarlion le haha... ty to recyclepaper and party ^^
7 June 2009
haiz.... i was listening to the song awake... den i realised that me and him watched 3 movies too =(
went for lunch at 11am.... ate alot... after that went to see new hses... eugene ask me to buy one for him lol... too bad these hses not very nice... came home and watched sweeny todd... the show seemed nice at first... felt disgusted in the middle... he actually killed people using a razor.. and its not the normal spilling blood... is the squirting splirting blood... eeeewww..... from the neck sommore leh... in the end he himself oso die.... den that woman even worse... sell meat pie with the humans that guy killed... yucks.... den eugene say he very angry so i called him ask wad happen... same thing as me bah... pissed off by our PRs... anyways... we were on the phone while watching night in the museum... and soon watching incredible tales le hehe...
guess wad? he dun dare watch alone =p when i wanted to put down tempo.... he scream and ask me not to put down lol... haha... no need scared de im here ^^
6 June 2009
OMA i met someone today i lost contact for 4 years!!! sliver mei!!! lol... we met... becos of baybe mummy... that time she is another of her daughter... so is my darrkshadow... den she became my mei... somehow when mummy quit maple... we all lost contact... i got mummy msn... bo mei de... den i somehow saw mei at ludi again... a few mths later... den after a while my bl tio cleared... den i forgot her ign totally... been looking for screenshots to see her ign but bo... den 4 years later... meaning just now... i suddenly saw her again!! i thot she forgot me liao... but she din xia... den we chatted alot... bl and msn... lalalals...
b4 this i was actually dam pekcek... bloody pr go smash my specs... now i no more eyes... sobs... must go change new eyes le haha..
ohya... my card no more le... go cancel cos must mum duwan pay annual fee of 20$... but nvm... i go apply new card from another bank ahaha!!! so i got new card =p
ok nth much... din tok to eugene much today... he tio scolded by his mama... sads... lol... but we smsed alot...
5 June 2009
Hatred.... is all the world knows bout? Love... but the world knows naught... hate thy neighbours and love yourself? Is that what god taught us about? Love your neighbours as you love yourself ain't not?
haiz... god tells us to be loving and forgiving... but i cant imagine why someone who is borned christian... someone who is so nurtured in his own believes cant see this... why must you be so blinded by wad others say... and wad others think... that you cant function on your own? well at least u seem to have much more peace in your hse now... and you have good frends around you now.... wish you happiness and gd luk in your life....
crap..... woke up in the morning... saw something dumb on my email that makes me upset... decided to make a few calls... eugene was aslp lol... first time i wake up earlier than him... he called me back afterwards... chatted alot... laughed alot... felt better...
ok this whole day sux... parents nagged alot... making things just totally screwed... i had a night swim just now... to try to get rid of things.... but it din work... im sry.... but u know... ive been thinking for so long...
and theres been a msg from aw.... saying that i frequently pon band in nyjc to come back mss... and showing bad example to juniors... zz ya i pon ar... i oso got no sense of belonging there... people suay lar... everytime sick tio mc... doctor say cannot go mar... oso not i bo valid excuse... and hor pls get this str8 lor... i long oso duwan go syf de.. long wan quit band de... is got that stupid form dun allow people quit mar... u sure i everytime go back chatchat and nev help mare? i chat is have hor i wun deny... but u cant deny i bo help hor... that time concert ask me go help play... den i oso everytime go back help sectionals oso hor... and ya i go back find people... i want see my bros cannot mare? but i go back oso nev disturb practise rite? i oso got help them rite? so wads the complain about? im not against aw or anything lor... im just defending what ive got to say... and its too bad i recieved this email on top of my bad mood liao... ive been having some feeling that his against me somehow for being a frend of sim... and so are all those people who have ties with her.... fk nvm... i go swim liao
jam.... where are u... ive been searching for u for so long... i know i must be crazy to search for you by just your surname... there like so many people with the same surname as u... staying in the same area.... ive tried the residential listings... haiz... jam u know.... ive sorted it out now... im really ready to meet u now.... pls.... just give me a chance k? ive been gazing at my swimming pool for so long... but i havent seen you at all... im really sry.... i cant take it much longer... =(
4 June 2009
couldnt slp... kept thinking of you.... haiz... your very laughter and voice.... i could just hear it ringing in my head....
ok i woke up at 8+ today... so funny i sms eugene say i slping... den he say why i slping can sms... i said i sleep-typing lol... anyways they came at 10+ waited till 11 den go down... they playing ps2 and com.... den i brought 4 rackets and about 10 balls down... came back with 4 rackets and no more balls... lol all of them ended either up the roof or out of the court... anyways.... we played so late cos eugene lar... lead them to wrong place zz... so i had to go pick them up... and jun ming lor... gei kiang... take wrong direction LRT... den wait for him so long... anyways had great fun today... after tennis we went to dabao LJS and KFC to my hse... den nick wanted to watch phantom of opera... so we ate and watched... den cont with com and ps2.... after they left.... mom scolded me... said i take care of eugene much better than PR.... cos i let eugene sit on me but i dun let PR do that.... den dad scolded me for spending time with my juniors again... dad dabao fried rice and noodles for dinner... watched my usual 7pm show... went to NTUC to buy things at 8... bought mac for suppers... ended home at 9... eugene called at 8 and we toked for so long haha... resting my ears now... his probably gona call at 2230 haha... he siao de lar... i go ask my mum how to see ji is male or female... den he go ask the coffee shop uncle ni de ji bai zai na li... i was like wth lor... haha!!! and i was singing until sim called... he asking me if its my com music xia... lol... i said is i singing... he was like... wth? so high pitch? i thot is girl xia zzz... people high pitch mar... is i normal toking purposely try to make it sound hoarse nia....
3 June 2009
oh well the tennis was postponed to tmr... went to celebrate alvin bday.... anyways i went to montfort w/o breakfast.... cos eugene ask me fastfast go... den after that leh went to eat lunch with eugene, alvin, sim and her frend qiulin (or whatever her name is) den went up to QL hse.... watching some thai horror and marley and me... that thai horror i watch halfway b4... not scary de.... eugene wanted me to scream... but i din haha... eugene lor make my whole body ache xia... sit on me not enough... still jump around lol... den we watch marley and me halfway they go take out a choc cake... sim baked it this morn i think... hope i dun get the runs tonight haha... i got a feeling i would xia.... cos my stomach very weak.... anyways i couldnt go to kallang with them... i told my parents i will be back b4 dinner ps... lol they go kallang see singapore river and the longkao zui... aiya duno lar... den i was so blur... i din realise i took the wrong direction bus... heng got eugene tell me... if not i ended up at toa payoh... was so sleepy that i din realise.... anyways im now home =) hope tmr will be better haha...
lol conferencing with nick eugene and ryan... eugene ar keep on "your mama lar bugger" "i better do it or i slap u ar" lol...
ahhh i now having the runs... so did eugene... must be the cake... ahh dam... i tak sai for 1hour... den suddenly laosai.... yucks!!!
haiz watching marley and me this afternoon that time... i was thinking of someone.... missed that person alot... =( why did things have to go out this way? i miss you sooo sooo soo much...
2 June 2009
today leh woke up at 9+ dota and studying.... blahblahblah boring... today they went ryan hse... sianz i din know.... nev tell me bugger xia... tried wow today... stupid l4d.... duno why wont work.. so does maple.... sianz... now eugene toking to me.... hahaha he call me say bored lol... and den we were joking again.... *bang the ahneh* "eh ah neh sry ar... i cant see you in the dark" go to the chicken rice stall "eh uncle ni de ji bai zai na li?(where is your hanged chicken)?" den we were watching tv from 9 to 10... he went to slp after 10.... and so am i!!! haha... nitez =p
1 June 2009
1st day of hols and im beginning to enjoy it... no more early mornings and come home late thingy... went to school at 9 for chem... halfway thru kena diarrhoea... so i din go for maths... den nick sms say can go his hse... so me eugene ryan met and went... so stupid... nick say wait at mrt... ryan say walk to nick hse... cos sure meet halfway... den i told ryan nick sure go by shortcut... he dun believe... den how? reach nick hse... nick at mrt.... lawls... den nick nev bring phone... so ryan ran to mrt to find nick.... so wad did we do at his hse? his mama very good xia... order pizza for us... on friday we 6 person eat 2 regular pizza.... today 5 people ate 2 large 1 regular pizza... den got hagen daz and ben's and jerry's + choc topping!!! ahha.... den we were playing dota and l4d... ok jm seriously play like pr.... ask for help dun help.... team killer... people wan die... tyring run... he stand there tak lou.... n1 xia... den after that nick and jm wan 1v1.... so i see eugene play l4d.... he sit on my leg and play... den suddenly he farted xia.... tmd... my lj cao cao liao lar... den at 6... me ryan and eugene went to heartland mall there... at chicken rice... den shopshop... we walk in circles in cold storage xia... den we keep laughing until eugene keep rofl.... seriously rofl... he is on the floor.... den i pei them wait for 101 b4 going home... haha...
31 May 2009
Wah kao... fell down once... tripped over stupid ball... stepped on the ball and put tou... hand orh cheh leh.... walao.... one big patch there.... den nick say tmr his cousin visit him from overseas... so say maybe another day den go his hse... den eugene say wana play lan tmr....
30 May 2009
ah i woke up quite late today... was sleeping so soundly haha... den i played dota the whole day... tried kotl and techie... not bad xia... both very zai... anyways... had dinner at some western food cafe... had cream penne + chicken chop + cheese fries.. and since pr couldnt finish his baked rice i simply ate it too... ok im getting fat soon ahha... ive been eating alot these days... i think cos im too happy... lols.... cant wait for monday xia!!! haha...
29 May 2009
ah today was fun!! had eng paper in the morning... it was quite fine... den after eng was PE.... testing about youth olympic games and health stuff... and guess wad? out of 20marks, i could only do the question with 1 mark... 1 out of 20... ahh... how nice... anyways my initial intention was to meet at 130pm at serangoon mrt... but exams ended early... so i called all to come now... and geuss wad? eugene was so eager that he reached b4 i did... lol... the rest came too... only dennis purple and joel were meeting us directly... so me, eugene, ryan, nick and jm went to cathay first... the queue was like dam long... so we had to go to PS... and i always thot that cathay had shorter queues.. i din know that GV was totally empty... so yeah we got our tickets... den we went for lunch at kopitiam... dennis came and met us there... den joel and purple came... stupid joel say we cheapskate eat cheap food... u so good u treat us to swensons lar!!! anyways we went to the arcade... i was playing jubeat... guess wad i was playing extreme!! and i can do well xia.. played parapara too... and they kept racing on datona for so many rounds... won once though... cos the rest of the times i kept getting sabotaged... and den the movie was terminator... very nice xia... lots of actions... and during the movie eugene wanted to sit beside me again... so i sat betwwen piggy and eugene ^^ i bought both nachos and popcorn for the 3 of us to share... and den i was like holding both of their hands during the mid of the show... was like over excited or something lol... eugene oso lar... suddenly cover his ears... den i was lying on piggy once in a while oso lol... after the show... they wanted to watch another one!!! lol i told them i duwan watch le... cos no more shows i wana watch... so we went to PC bunk to play l4d... at first cannot set up lan... even ryan and jm who always play l4d oso duno... den i anyhow clickclickclick... den ok le ^^ oh well played versus mode... just nice got 8 of us... so 4v4 each side... me, eugene, jm and purple on same team... dam! keep losing to piggy xia... din know piggy can play game so well... anyways we played till like 7+? den both piggy and joel went home... the rest went for dinner... decided to go heartland mall to eat... den go there duno wad to eat... walked up the escalator and went into pizza hut lol... quite cheap lar.... buy 1 get 1 free... so each one pays 5bucks? lol... den by the time we eat and chat finish.. it was like alrdy 10pm... so we decided to head home... alrite folks!!! monday at your mama hse nick =p
28 May 2009
ahha today i tried the new circle line... omg no more 15min walks from srng mrt to sch.... ahha its just a 2 min ride yeah!!! at 3pm... even b4 lessons ended.... eugene smsed me and asked me to come for band lol... and yeah i had to go back for the montfort sch stamp... i that day get signature totally forgot about the stamp... so today had to go back... haha and yeah im intending to go back anyways... haha so i was playing the picc flute oboe and bassoon today... den after band went to mac with piggy and eugene and ryan... and tmr we all going watch movie again =p haha.... no fair lor they no sch... and i have exams... complete crap!!! english and PE exam lawls...
27 May 2009
Haiz i saw HIM on the bus.... haiz... i duno what to do....
just finished physics... couldnt do everything properly... feeling very uneasy now... duno why but i feel a lost in my sense of security... prob cos i just realised my MYE or coming... and i haven done much... or maybe its cos of seeing HIM and thinking of everything again... haiz...
26 May 2009
Ok today supposed to go back mssmb after school... den mr sim said got phys remedial... so sian... nvm i ask him to release me earlier den i can rush then on time... nid to get Ong wuan seah to sign something... and hopefully got people pei me out lata... think prob eugene and nick... and guess wad? nick wants to watch drag me to hell on monday!!! WTH!!! i hate that show!!! ever since i saw the advert with them... its so EEEW!!! i was like im so not gona watch it... in the end nick say wan watch... i will be screaming more like the uninvited lor... and maybe this friday if no band he say wan watch terminator... oh well anything bah... im seriously free this whole hols.... nth to do... perhaps i shall study for my mid year... but all work and no play makes rain a dull boy ^^ and if rain is dull... he will RAIN!!! ok thats lame... ohn well bo pian... having 2 and half hour break now... seriously nth to do...
hmm ok i went to mssmb at 430... told mr sim to excuse me... haha saw piggy.... missed him so much... i gave him a first poke in like so many weeks... missed him alot... den at first after band alot people wan go eat... in the end left me, piggy, eugene, purple and jonathan... oh well... at least i get to be with piggy again ^^
25 May 2009
Why? why does the people i love have to end up leaving me... i cant believe im crying again right now... crying myself to slp.... im trying my best to hold on to all of you... but time and again... my hands are failing me... i cant seem to hold on to anyone at all... and to think that we were still playing our favourite song... you were born to be loved....
wasnt that stable today... i decided to go find eugene after sch... met him below his block... and we chatted for very long... until the sky darkened and i found out that its super late... den i went home... thkx for toking to me ^^ im feeling much better....
24 May 2009
Lets cont with the food bazzar shall we? first went to plaza sing to collect movie tickets... then went to waraku @ herens... on the way saw the adult planet sex shop... we were like laughing at it.... den at herens we couldnt find the restraunt... bloody information guy bluff us say at basement... went down cannot find... asked another person... she said at 4th floor... 4th floor cant find... in the end it was at 5th floor... wth... Ordered udon + Oyako don + Salmon cheese and cream + Grilled garlic chicken + some apple alchol drink Ok was damn full... walked back to plaza sing... again saw the adult planet... and laughing again... Watched Star trek.... it was damn nice.... alot of action... den after star trek went to arcade... laopei gave me 10 dollar to play... but i spent 2$ on jubeat and kept the rest... not bad lar i can get C for extreme mode lor... den i go shopshop and bought a shuriken from otaku house... have been searching for that... the shop keeper said they importing that when i just finished block test... until now i cant find it on the shelf... no wonder lar... they nev display... heng ar i got go ask... den i oso ordered a mokona plush from there.. wonder when its gona come... den decided to skip dinner... cos too full and proceded to a second movie... night in the museum 2... ahha dam funny xia alot of comedy.... but got one scene lor... make me think of alot of things... like to treasure time and people and love... really missed you xia... and den after that went for supper at boon tong kee... ok i thot it was "boon donkey" when i first heard the name... haha i was smsing eugene whole day... but he din reply xia... i thot something happened... turned out his hp no batt... so he started smsing me only after my second movie... but today wasnt as nice as friday... really wished to go out with you guys again =p friday was a blast... dam fun...
and now im suppse to study for physics SPA exam tmr... gud luk to all ^^
well the truth is i dun get along well with my jc mates... cos we have diff interests and thinking... we dun laugh at each others jokes... so i guess its social misfit... well thats why i prefer to hang out with you guys lar... hmm... how about hols at my hse? or at your hse? or maybe a chalet? haha den can slp in tgt...
well theres a reason why i dun look down or discriminate people u know... i prefer to see people and their good stuff rather than to sterotype or look at the bad stuff.... you can say it maybe my wierd personality... i guess maybe its how i see this world from a diff perspective bah... thats why i dun hate anyone... i prefer to love and change people rather than hate and cause dispair... for love is so powerful that it can do anything....
someone used to tell me... "Look on the bright side of life!" haha... even if life is at its worse, there is always a bright side of it ^^
jamjam valevale lingling and linlin jie... where are you =( i miss u alot...
23 May 2009
Ok im super full... i ate zui kueh... den fish soup + carrot cake + hokkien mee... now im eating choc muffin ahhahha... got a big appettite today... and den i asked eugene if he wana eat with me... he sent me a picture of him opening his mouth... ahrrmmm... lol i thot he yawning xia... so funny!!! dinner was after church... guess wad i ate? ahha durian puffs + ban mian + thai fried noodles!!! yeah man!! its been a long time i ate so much... there are 2 reasons when i gugle food... one is to give me energy to keep high... the other to give me energy to cry... and guess wad? im like so happy the whole day... ever since piggy smsed me and eugene pei me sms whole day... ahhha... yeah have been smsing eugene whole day... i told him i have appetite enough to eat him... lawls...
edited ytd post... i added in more stuff i found in nick.c's blog... and i reorganised the post...
22 May 2009
ahh.... i cant wait for school to end today... so excited about going out again... its been a long time since i ever went out with someone... eugene spammed me smses the whole day... and he even called to ask me faster finish school... lol... ask the teacher release early lar ^^ ok anwyays im going to meet them soon....
was reading my old posts... i missed you alot...
well today was very nice... nicholas, eugene, ryan, jun ming, jeremy lucas and eugene's friend came... we met at srng mrt at 3pm... went PS for movies... in the mrt we keep suaning jeremy about how black he was.... decided to watch the uninvited haha.... its not very scary.... at first eugene say got ghost he dun dare watch... den he say if wan watch must sit beside me... he say his gona hold my hand and scream... since there was so much time b4 the show started... we went to zone X to play... ryan and eugene's friend started off with time crisis 4... den nick and jun ming and jeremy was playing silent hill... me walk around see see them play... den after all "die" le.. we all raced datona... ya lor si eugene keep making me crash... den i kena 3rd and his first.... nick say wan play ddr... but got people... so he tried the machine next to it... ok he suck at it... he got everyone to step one button each lol... i think people think we crazy de lor... den i went to play jubeat... i started with the easy songs... no kick... so i went to the advanced one.... not bad... quite fun... den eugene played basketball lol... and guess wad we cleared only stage 2... failure xia.... left 30 min... we decided to go take neoprint... but we cant squeeze everyone tgt into the pic... so we skipped it.... going back to PS... it was kinda stupid... we wanted to buy drinks... so went to carrefour... we at b2 so take travelator up to 1st floor.. den eugene and ryan go mess up the packets of chips that are put along the travelator... after we paid for drinks... we went up to cinema... then at the lift... got this woman... the door open... she peered outside with her head.... and knocked onto the lift door lol!!! dam funny lar... and eugene kept rofling... i bought drinks and pop corn for eugene... den b4 the show.... me and eugene kepe burping at each other face... then people behind keep laughing xia... and the advert... eugene and ryan was singing along... like the HSBC "The things about me" and starhub "sexy bomb" lol... everyone kept laughing lor.... den lights out (woah here comes jeremy's ultimate darkness) show was going on... eugene and i were holding each others hand lol... but i screamed more than him lor... eugene lar... made the whole cinema laugh instead.... he made all sorts of funny noises... and laughing at the scariest moments of the show lol... after the movie, we went to walk around the anime collections shops... and oso go yamaha walkwalk.... i bought an ocarina... cos its like 5 dollars lol we ate chicken rice at dhoby exchange... after that we were still bored... ryan say wan watcha midnight movie... i was like wth.... we went to hougang mall to play arcade again... (eugene's idea) eugene say he wan go catch bear for me... i was like lol... anything... in the end only got sweets haha... no bears... we walked around hgmall... found this shop that sells alot funny things... very tempted to buy some when i realised i no more money.... i brought 50 dollars today.... ended up treating eugene to pop corns... + movie tics + arcarde + dinner... no more money... so we went to eugene house there slack... the playground no swing de sianz... den we tok and tok for very long... den laopei call den home... haha wish could go out again ^^ thks for making me so high again =)
piggy sms me today... when i saw his first sms i was dam glad... i was actually worried that something might have happened... well his fine and thats all that matters...
21 May 2009
Haha.... well nth much now... just finished my dota match... din know i was so good at playing invoker although its my first time... killed alot... assist alot oso... i duno why im feeling so happy now... prob cos im thinking of tmr after school.... i'll be with my mssmb peeps again.... although i wish so badly you would be there too... haiz... well not sure where we would be going yet... still planning.... any ideas guys?
20 May 2009
I was reading on Mitch's Tuesdays with morrie... they were toking about death and seeing death from a whole perspective... he talked about family....and what family meant... "If you dont have support from a family.. u dont have nuch at all... "without love we are like birds with broken wings...." "This us what family is about, not just love but letting others know that there's someone who is watching out for them..." Haiz... i just missed my family so much... i wonder if they even care at all...
19 May 2009
happy birthday to elaine mei!!! haha... well just keep your life happy k <3
today was quite fast... although it was a long day.... it passed off quite fast.... well today had normal lessons.... den at 3pm went for A level SPA exam.... It was quite stupid.... everyone knew the question before we went in le... anyways was supposed to be home early.... but so stupid they said there will not be any trains to punggol today? i was like wth.... anyways got janice pei me take bus... haha so not lonely... and today i had so many incoming calls since a long time... recieved a call from mei during phys.... she say she no sch... ask me go out find her... of all days u call me on my latest day lol... and yeah a couple more calls... one from alvin... asking me to go back montfort... well... when i saw his name on the called id... i knew something fishy happening... i was right.... alvin passed the phone to jiayi... she asked if i was free now... i told her im busy...
well yeah these few days i seem to have changed again... im no longer someone who keeps going out le... cos so many people still having MYE... and partly im trying to study... i promised someone i will study hard.... and though we arent on toking terms.... im still keeping that promise.... so well im not really free anymore... cos ive changed my priorities... im spending more time on those people who still cares for me... so yeah....
and my stomach aint feeling good again... hurts like mad... been gaving cramps again... haiz... i missed you.... and your "take cares"... pls come back to me again...
Jam... u know ive been waiting and searching for you a long time... pls.... i love you...
currently im eating up alot again... trying to gulge myself i think... though my stomach hurts... i still have to stuff down more ice cream and cakes and pringles... haiz...
18 May 2009
Happy birthday mummy!!! haha i love you so much...
well today din go for the match... got maths remedial.... i wanted to pon... but since we doing vectors... which is my worst chapter... i decided to stay bah.. anyways... remedial end at 2... game ends at 5... of cos i choose the earlier one ^^
went to thai food at kovan for dinner... not bad xia... no wonder the queue every nite oso super long... dad bought a strawberyy icecream cake from swensons... 1kg for 4 people... can eat till u die...lol mum says why not go buy ice cream and put candle... cheaper this way... lol..
17 May 2009
today... nth much... its all about study... occasional long breaks.... like watching a dvd or playing dota... and a super long dinner break with relatives at ahma hse... played soccer with them... super reluctant though.... cos i have like pe twice a week... super lazy ahha... guess what my bishop lev 127... i was freaked out... my bl and guild all gone.... my eq all missing... i thot tio hack... actually is laopa.... he help me train... he del bl and guild cos bo people on9... and the items were those left from the previous hacked... lol... anyways im looking forward to tmr.... haha... going volley ball match woots!!! no dreaded econs lect... no phys prac... no maths remedial!!! yeepee!!!
16 May 2009
Happy birthday yung wai didi haha love you alot... im so sry i cant be with you today... cos my parents wun allow me to fly a plane to meet u... ahhahahaha.... well i just wana let u know that i will always be there if u need me... hope u will come sg this year den we can meet =p huggies!!
well today went to church... the priest toked about love... that love is unconditional... love is about being kind... love cannot hate... and we should all love one another... that life without love is a life in vain.... yeah... well i kinda agree... love is what god made us to....
15 May 2009
Hmm... today only had 2 lessons.... ended 1230.... wanted to go find andrea mei but she paiseh... lol... she crazy ar... last few days call me from kor to ahgong to ahma... wth lor... im not old!!! ok after school actually had last minute class movie outing again... cos they say 1230 end go home nth to do... but they wana watch angel and demon!!! its like anti-catholic show lor... so i din go... went to lan shop AGAIN instead... wah this few days i keep going lan shop.... money gona pok le.... yalor... cos PR got MYE.... den laopei on leave teach... kns... den i see liao dun feel like going home.... cos go home is dam super sian lar... everything oso cannot do.... and b4 that i asked shadow if he wan go out with me watch movie... he said he going out with friends le... in the end he oso playing dota at home zzzz ok lets see... how was my life so far? well its been kinda ok lor... back to my simple life of flowing to wherever im swept to... seems like after all the changes... im back to b4 the age of 16... no more the guy who thinks about whats gona happen next... no more the guy who thinks about others.... im now the happy-go-lucky person who just go around doing anything on my mind at that time... there is great news today... monday no lessons... whole school going cheer for volleyball team finals...
well at least you are feeling better now.... at least u are no longer thinking much about him... at least you seem much happier with your click now... though you feel terrible inside.... you are now having much more attention and care from others.... you seem to be a more happy kid now.... so my mission is accomplished =)
13 May 2009
well... ive nev blamed anyone for how my life turned out to be... its all like this becos of the choices i made... and i nev regret those choices... i gave up my social life for the people i love... i gave all my class outings a miss just so that i could be with u guys... i skipped band practise to go out with you guys... and as a result... im not in syf.... and of cos i went back to montfort even though my parents were VERY against the idea... i oso went against their idea of spending too much time with you all... so here i am now... trying to find a new space in this society... which i have given up so that i could love you even more... and though things have changed so much.... ive always thought about you forvever more... you are always on my mind...
12 May 2009
today school very fast end wor... 2 lessons in morning... den 1hour movie screening... den 1 and half hour break.... den 1 and half hour english... den go home... ok someone brought xbox to school? with guitar hero? lol... the guitar club actually held a game at the atrium... see alot of funny people.... got one action so big b4 song... and when song started... he died within 10 seconds... haha.... ohya first 2 lessons was test... so today sort of no lesson like that... hope i do well for this maths test... dun think will fail bah ^^ i promised someone i will work hard de... so cant fail anymore =p
11 May 2009
haha today school hols for me.. so din go sch.... class decided to have movie outing at 12pm at plaza... as usual... took more than 30min for all to gather... watched a 2pm wolverine... lol i watched b4 le xia... din eat lunch... cos the timing so wierd... den after that went to aston... ate grilled and fried chicken... haha... quite cheap... but the chicken so hard... like eating rubber.... lol... den i went pc bunk and arcade look look see see b4 going home... haha... wanted to ask shadow pei me go lan de... he so guai say got exam cant play lol... like real lor!!! my foot ar!!! haha =)
10 May 2009
Happy mothers day to both mummy and baybe mummy!!! hehe... love you lots ^^ <3 today leh... nth much... stayed home the whole day... slept all the way.... dam nice weather... anyways was watching slumdog millionaire.... ok lar the plot not bad..... haha playing dota with shadow... he internet so tupid... keep dc... yucks...
9 May 2009
slept at 1am this morn. waited for shadow to on9 and play but he din. slept till dam shiok until i kena woken up. went to novena church at 11am. had a shopping at novena. den went to marine parade eat. some china restraunt. food not bad though. liked the dumplings. damn nice. haha. dinner was at magaritas. some mexican food... passed by there during lunch wanted to it.... but closed till dinner rawr... went to alfredo's intalian restraunt... oso closed... crap... dinner was after church... supposed to be alfredo's but its closed for some reason... and after dinner at margaritas its open!!! sianz... well i jokingly asked if the porky was save to eat... hahas... the boss told me they are mexican swines.... lawl... nice sense of humour... anyways shadow asked me dota with him again... buaiis...
someone used to ask me "why would u give up your happiness to try making everyone happy" well to me its all about making people happy that maked me happy. that was the past though. he told me again that sometimes we should think about our own happiness. and i guess his right. ive been giving in to people's request. ive been helping and trying to make others happy for so long. but what have i gotten in return? do i feel happy? no. ive got to thank piggy on this one. he told me that one shouldnt care or think too much about life. life should be all about being happy somone oso said that we control our own paths in life. not life control us. we have the choice to make our life happy. or sad. im still kinda lost of what makes me happy in this world. isit my friends? or my families? or what i do? well i guess maybe its about how you define happiness... to me happiness is about caring and sharing... and maybe thats why i used to feel happy when i was in sec school. where we cared for each other. and i guess i do feel happy now too... cos im beginning to feel that there are still those around me who still cares.
9 May 2009
oh yeah sure im making up stories. go ahead and think this way if u wan. my consience is clear. if u all wan i can oso post the chat log up here to show everyone what happened.
well. since u trust her so much. and what i tell u and u wun believe den thats up to u. im 100% sure that ive NEV recieved a single sms about cutting ties from her. and my chat logs are still fresh original untouched. if u wan see screenshot oso can. show whole log oso can. and ive classmates toking about my blog everyday during lessons till im sick of it. i have my overseas mates constantly non-fail msn and emails about my posts. ive no worries about no readers. and if ur gona continue pressing that im guilty of this whole thing. well thats your judgement. ive already said that my consience is clear. theres no need for me to lie or twist facts or whatsoever.
u say cut ties ar? den why everytime got sms or call or msn appear de? are u sure u even said properly u wana cut ties during the duration between your syf and this thing happening?
orh ok lor i pengwei lor. u tell me which part i peng lar.
my tagbox get tagged of cos i reply lar. ur tagbox people tag u oso reply wad. ur tagbox tio spam u oso make big hoo-ha i sms u? cos in the first place u nev said we were cutting ties. but on the contrary someone else said that u told him u cut ties with me. but u still sms and msn me. so whats this? if you truly said u cut ties with me you wouldnt have communicated with me. and i wouldnt have replied or toked to u oso. so ur trying to say that this whole thing started off becos of my first post? are u sure thats how it happened? i was preety sure that it happened becos somone asked for help and then flared up and call people in to "help" scold. my first post as u alrdy read b4 was about me saying that i wana help u but u flared up and call people come. and im irritated that it always happened the same way when u flared up. i was only asking u to not let emotions control u. that was the first post. and i oso said that the reason why i blogged and not tell you personally its becos you will continue calling people in and "help scold"? which will not solve the prob?
theres a counter in my blog actually. no need to brag the its self explanatory. and i know that its not only u guys who reads it. cos i know the number of DIFFERENT visitors each day. and how close a friend is to me is how i feel about them. i dun care about whether people use me or not. it doesnt matter if people lie to me or not. im not fooled. i do know whats going on although it may seem that im oblivious. im just not bothering it.
well what have i not gotten over? im perfectly fine with things getting on now. and did u just say that i blame u guys for not cutting ties with me perfectly? i know u did. but im obviously sure she din until now.
ah so did i imply that your friends are gl? so "stop calling your friends come in" means gl lar. ok fine lor. if thats what u say. yaya i beng lor. wadeva. beng no beng rain still the same. the one who nev change. the one whose stubborn blahblahblah and well since u wana cut off ties so much....
8 May 2009
ok today sch ended preety fast. had a wierd day today though. first was pe... den 1 hour break... a bird kamikazed into the canteen fan... wing got severed... lots of blood... think it died back there when the cleaner took it away... prob to end its pain.... den we had maths... i doodled my time away on the table... drawing ninja weaponry and cadbury? lol would'nt it be nice? haha den econs.... hmmm... lets say we played and chatted through the whole lesson. after that we ran out of sch to buy snacks and drinks. cos next period is english and we had movie screening.. lol... den schools over... and my shadow now asking me dota with him... tatas...
had dinner at thai restraunt.... wah i ordered all chilli de haha... people say that spices add flavour into your life.... anyway dam full now... din play with shadow just now cos i studying... haha... i promised people i will study and be hardworking de... so i must... so prob playing it lata....
8 May 2009
Dear readers, the pot is actually calling the kettle black... well i just wana express that my blog and tagbox is democratically open for anyone to read and use... but somehow or rather the counter seemed to have jumped alot lately... and so is the count on my tagbox... u know what? i seem to have unwelcomed visitors these few months... not only defaming but trying to twist truths... in the first place there wasnt even a "calling my friends guai lan" in any of my posts... the previous post i deleted hours ago merely read "i just hope u will stop the vulgarities and 'not happy come fight' and 'guai lan' and stuff everytime something happens..." when did i ever toked about others being guai lan? i was just toking about the things u always mention during quarrels that im very guai lan and stuff... "fight a girl"? now wait just a minute... when did i ever do that? and to the public... i have one advice if ur looking at one sided views i suggest u not take sides at all... if u wana see the history of who come find who first i'll be glad to show. and as ive mentioned b4. "HEll no i dont need you" fine den... i shant care anymore neither should i care.... after all "she don't need someone like you to 'care' for her"
first and foremost im not dumb. i do know what cut ties meant. being ignorant and stubborn? u can jolly well go find out who come find who first. u wan see chat logs oso can. did i ever recieve any sms asking me cut ties? i dun think so. she cut ties with me at the same time u cut ties with me? is that so? im as sane as on 22apr as now. and i do know that on 23rd apr somone tried to msn me? implications? when i said"Stop calling your friends come" what does that imply to u? your friends are guailan? and for your info pot calling the kettle black means accusing others for what you did yourself. e.g. "You are accusing me of starting this? Thats the pot calling the kettle black" reference: oxford dictionary and i do know who's visiting my blog or not. my friends nev tag doesnt mean that they dun visit at all... trying to hide ar? neh i dun think so. theres no reason to hide.
yeah take screen shot so wad? i del that cos since talking to u doesnt help at all. as i said b4 since when did "Stop calling your friends come" ever became "your friends are guailan"? u can show the whole world that screenshot and we can see who can find the same implications as u. peng wei ar? lets see whose the one trying peng wei. "can jolly well go fuck off la hor people dont need you in my life" u say de hor.
well if theres nth else i think i should find something better to do. although ive said i wouldnt brooch on this matter. well let just say im not trying to HIDE so let me stress this again... there WASNT even a sms asking to cut ties. and check who came to find who first before assuming.
7 May 2009
In life we meet different types of people... i used to categorise them under family; friends; and others well maybe i do have new categories... namely family; close friends; true friends; everyday-friends; fair weather friends... family as mentioned last time are people who will support you in whatever u do... they are those who last a life time.... close friends are friends who are always beside u.... whom u can share your secrets with.... but close friends are not eternal friends... they change after a while.... and becos of getting too close... somehow the relationship ends with a break within periods.... true friends are forever there... they may not be close to u.... but u know that they will always be there when u need them.... they will stand by you through your life... everyday-friends are those u just meet everyday... and lastly fair weather friends... those whom are with u when u are well... and they backstab and leave you when your down... one thing thats for sure.... friends come and go easily... you cant blame the cycle of life... you have to get on with it... thats what ive learnt... yeah sry piggy didi... i was wrong not to listen to u... your right... "no worries, be happy, kan kan zhuo ge kai xin ren" =)
7 May 2009
im busy and preparing for A levels... im trying to help u at the same time... and u know i always put friends before anything.... thats why i even try to recieve your call and chat on msn as much as i can... i know its hard to understand what im driving at... becos as u know im somone who doesnt think the way everyone else think... and becos of that we always quarrel.... i have to let u know that ive nev blamed you for who u are... for what happened to us... i just wana say that if u think that my solutions arent good for u.... why not consult others and see what they can help u? maybe their solutions are better? afterall u do have lots of good friends around u.... and since u said "HELL NO i dont need you" den fine....
and yes certainly i do have friends too... i just somehow realised that i do have true friends with me all the time... and all along i haven really seen who they are.... true friends are those whom u can rely on... depend on when u have probs.... when u need help... need somone to tok to... and yes indeed i do have many... some my ex school mates... some i met overseas... yes... i do realise that true friends doesnt have to be close friends... true friends are friends that have u deep in their heart somewhere....
for info's sake... im online most of the time on msn doesnt mean im on the com... my com is FFA in my hse... free for all.... and my msn is set as auto sign-in... and i do leave my com on even when im out, playing games or studying... i dun bother turning it on busy cos ive disabled my msn sound alrdy... and for info's sake again im slping when i got spammed... and yes ive read everything...
ive made a resolution now... yeah maybe i should have got this into my head long long ago... den it would have saved all the pain... "one should lead his life for the people who care and love u" yes i shouldnt just give up for those who dun care.... thkx for all those who care and guide me whenever im lost ^^ <3 baybe mummy forever <3 <3 shadow <3 <3 andreaaaaa mei <3 <3 all those who helped me <3
5 May 2009
haiz... ive never blamed people for all the break ups im having ya know... breakups happen its becos i cant get things right that the other person seem to see.... diff people have diff feelings and thinkings... and if they dun seem to understand each other... thats how breakups happen.... and of cos ive never thought of any of them as betrayal... betrayal is when u have a friend.... and u backstab that guy and stuff in front of the other friends... yes i do know what backstabbers mean... ive seen loads of them in my life... well mostly of these breakups are my fault.... cos i overlooked things and stuff... but theres one common thing in all the breakups... communication.... it just so happens that most of them are because of communication breakdown... everytime something happens.... no one tells me about the probs.... and i only get to know the source of the prob after the breakup occurs... and the thing is.... they keep saying that they dun care about rumours... but all the way till the end... its still because of rumours that spoil the whole thing... haiz.... i really duno what to do.... i feel so hopeless when i cant do anything about it... and i inadvertently hurt those around me... FML
4 May 2009
oh well its been a while since i last blogged... everything seems to go wrong... im no longer joining the syf.... but the bright side.... i feel that im more cheerful again... its been a long time since i spent time with my shadow... well these few days he peied me play dota and stuff... and theres baybe mummy toking to me.... so is mag and andreaaaa mei... and yeah joseph too for chatting nonsense at night...
u know.... ive just read this book i borrowed from the school library... it says... "It is a tragedy when people decide not to love others because they dun apprve of them, or they see them as illogical or unreasonable or self centered, and not worthy of thei love... It is a tragedy because love is not about approval or worthiness..." But its something special that comes from deep within the heart...
i wondered how come i can still feel this way after ive been hurt so many times... and especialy lied to by so many who are close to me... isit really true that those who are closer will hurt u more? it just sux.... the feeling of trying to be nice to others... trying to care for others... trying to make the world a better place for someone... and he or she comes to u and say all those hurtful things... now i know how jesus must have felt when he was dying for us... i still cant understand... is there wrong in loving somone? isit so hard to get the person to love u back? or maybe at least appreciate your love?
30 Apr 2009
why? why wun you gimme another chance? ive been trying so hard to keep our relationship... i started playing the games u play so that i can play with u... i change my lifestyle to get closer to u.... to understand u.... i know that there are many differences between us.... thats y i wanted to minimise them.... cant you give me another chance? u know i din mean to hurt u.... and i miss u alot.... it hurts to see you this way....
30 Apr 2009
Awake
With every appearance by you, blinding my eyes I can hardly remember the last time I felt like I do You're an angel disguised
And you're lying real still But your heart beat is fast just like mine And the movie's long over That's three that have passed, one more's fine
Will you stay awake for me? I don't wanna miss anything I don't wanna miss anything I will share the air I breathe I'll give you my heart on a string I just don't wanna miss anything
I'm trying real hard not to shake I'm biting my tongue But I'm feeling alive and with every breath that I take I feel like I've won You're my key to survival
And if it's a hero you want I can save you. Just stay here Your whispers are priceless Your presence is too, So please stay here
Will you stay awake for me? I don't wanna miss anything I don't wanna miss anything I will share the air I breathe I'll give you my heart on a string I just don't wanna miss anything
Say my name I just want to hear you Say my name so I know it's true You're changing me, you're changing me You showed me how to live So just say. So just say
That you'll stay awake for me I don't wanna miss anything I don't wanna miss anything I will share the air I breathe I'll give you my heart on a string I just don't wanna miss anything
26 Apr 2009
feeling much better... no more headache.... but heart ache getting more intense.... i just felt a sudden notion... i was wondering y i try so hard to care for others... to worry about others... and love others... but not only do they not care... they just ignore totally.... while others go to the point of hating me back... haiz... im on my wits end....
carrot didi... im really sorry for all i have done... for my behaviour and actions... and for hurting u so badly.... i know i haven been a good kor to u... less a good friend... but please... let me have a chance to be with you again...
jam... u once told me that even if its a thousand years... its worth the wait... the one who waits is the one who gains... u oso said to take it as a challenge... that we will face it together... u told me that once u have settle your 'o's u will come back to me de... its alrdy 6mths... still no news of you and vale and lingling mei and jolin jie... im sry about not holding on to you when you were there.... my life is alrdy at its worse... if you are reading this... please come back... and if you duno... i have changed my hp number le... i think u still know my hse number rite? or where i live? if u duno the exact unit number....wait by the pool side... i will walk pass there everyday... waiting for the glimpse of you.... i wish to hold you in my arms again... <3 always
24 Apr 2009
woke up at 1am... extreme cold... splitting headache + fever.... whole body numb and aching...
went to school at 730... came back after assembly.... couldnt take it....
i just feel... that no one cares about me at all.... even those whom i love.... doshite? why do i feel like this?
22 Apr 2009
Didi... its not what u thought..... i asked her to ask u out so that i can apologise to u de.... yes i was nervous when i wanted to apologise to u... I wanted to do it when we are alone... believe me i did... i planned this for 1 week le... u can ask jiayi... i told her to help me ask you out and when i can come to meet u i will apologise to u de... jiayi urged me to out everything aside n apologise to u... yes im only good at saying sry.... i know ive done lots of things wrong... not olny have i disappointed u.... i hurt u with what i did.... im sry bout my stubborn attitude and behaviour... didi... i hope u can forgive me.... and didi... ive nev treated u as my substitute... u can choose not to believe me.... but ive seriously love u as a bro from my heart.... i know ive not been close to you since the day we met.... but ever since i saw how even my mum can be take from my life... it just made me realise that ive been trying foolishly to get those people who hate me to come back with me... now that im trying to spend time with all those who are around me... and those i love who are still around.... can you please give me a chance to take care of you?
21 Apr 2009
The road is never long between friends... Sometimes in life, you find a special friend... Someone who changes your life just by being part of it... Someone who makes you laugh until you can't stop... Someone who makes you believe that there really is good in the world... Someone who convinces you that there really is an unlocked door just waiting for you to open it.... This is Forever Friendship..... But does it really exist?
17 Apr 2009
went to Hwa Chong today for band exchange.... and guess wad i miss u even more.... the seat we set.... even listening to the bands playing overture 1.... i can see you waiting in position at the start of the song... your face your smile... and i just wish that u will pop out beside me... and at least say a hi.... i so wish to hear your voice again.... your laughter.... and poking me for no reason at all.... i know im not somone very good at apologising... and i know writing in blogs arent sincere... but its very hard for me to go out and find you now... i have band practically almost everyday... lessons stretching all the way to 5pm... and band till 7 or 8 or 9... even band on sat and sun.... i really wish i could just give up all those just to find u.... although i may seem happy... but deep inside me i feel terrible... i always tell myself... i made a promise to u to nev go emo... so i shall try to stay happy as much as possible... thats y u see me now trying to smile even when im at the saddest moment.... i no longer cut.... its been 1 month since i last cried... didi i really love you.... thats y im still trying to get you back... i wouldnt have even bothered if i dun care for you rite? i really really wana go up to you and say... hey carrot didi... i love you and im sry for wad happened.... can you pls give me a chance? or at least allow me to apologise to you the next time we meet?
16 Apr 2009
hey carrot didi... if you think im feeling happy now... yes i am happy... but its not a total happiness im having here... i really and seriously need you.... i really want badly to apologise to you... i really want to look for you and apologise to you face to face.... im sry... so so sry.... i know i have made u disappointed in me.... im willing to change.... and i wana make you life happier....
15 Apr 2009
nth much today.... i feel so emotionless now.... haiz... all thks to the assembly talk... make me thing about HIM.... oh well... dreamt of carrot didi last nite... prob missed him too much... i just hope he will forgive me and tok to me soon... i really need his care and love =( rite now... all i have is piggy didi... and all his smses trying to cheer me up... of cos i feel ____ (no words to describe this feeling) but i need both carrot didi and piggy didi... only then will i be truly happy...
saw this commercial on tv... i can give you the link... pls go watch... its very meaningful... http://www.thinkfamily.sg/web/general/mcys_Sm_Prog.mov its a very touching movie.... please treasure all those you have with you... and rmb those who passed on in your life.... rmb... "It is the imperfection that let you find perfection in them"... this movie will forever be in my mind...
14 Apr 2009
time fly very fast today... well.... was watching fighting spiders just now... i really missed the days at mss.... with clifford and daron.... and of cos i miss alot of people too.... the people i use to hang out with in 4E1.... my didis... =) its all too good a memory now.... how i wish i could turn back time... i wouldnt mind doing O levels again... just to be with the people who make me look forward to seeing the next day.... i miss u guys so much =( oh well... all of us have our own life.... guess this is the point of life we have to let go of many things.... but i cant seem to have the will to let go...
Love - Is something that cannot be explained.... Is something that draws me to you.... Is something that causes pain.... Why then do i dearly love you?
Of cos lar... u my didi mar... you silly piggy... you are already part of my family... part of my life now =) of cos must love you lar ^^
13 Apr 2009
haha... had a long chat with piggy on sms... he din sms me for few days... i started getting worried... though of lots of stuff... like his ignoring me... and stuff like that... well... turned out his just too LAZY to sms me!!! lol... oh well... my day started of badly... monday blues... theres a maths test which we were suppose to come 1hr ahead of assembly to do... almost missed it until i was reminded.... gona fail it tough.... too tired to think.... SAS brightened my day tough... i was about to start thinking wildly... den she smsed something to make me laugh... den piggy replied me... he really brightened my day so much... i almost needed to wear sunglasses haha... piggy didi... i really love you... i really really love you.... pls dun care about what other people say about us k? just know that i truly love you as a brother... nothing else.... i just hope u will love me as much.... i really dun care if they say im gay or wad... wad matters is that u trust me that im straight =) and thank god u assured me that you do ^^ i really miss alot of people now.... first kor.... den jamie, vale, lingling and jolin jie... yung wai didi.... arthur didi.... carrot didi... darling didi.... HIM... and guess what.... carrot didi's right.. i dun do anything to get them back.... i seriously duno what to do... God please guide me to do the right thing... =/
12 Apr 2009
Happy easter everyone!!! haha... god says that there will not be any easter bunnies or eggs this year... so he sent this easter piggy (me) to distribute easter carrots to each of u ^^ lalala...
called cute didi and elaine mei at night... toked with them for quite long... really missed them... giddy's still the same old idiot.... lol... still ignoring ppl and doing his othings when ppl toking... elaine getting more and more pai.... i duno wad to do xia.... anyways... hope this tok does clear of my monday blues...
11 Apr 2009
woke up at 10.... slacked till band start... wasnt really focused in band.... i kept thinking of piggy and carrot didi... im wondering how they are now.... and when will i get to tok to them again... 8pm easter vigil mass... lasted till 10 pm.... theres a part where i started thinking.... thinking of the lyrics of the song... its titled "above all" its very meaningful.... and yeah its about how much he cared for us.... and in the end he was still betrayed by those he loved... its kinda sad.... well yeah... dumbdumb smsed me asking me to call.... wanted to call but got something on.... so i told her to sms... but she said forget it.... =( im sry... i tried to end everything fast to call u... SAS asked me to call her too.... but i was in church when she smsed me... in the end settled finish le.... already 1230.... sighs...
10 Apr 2009
haiz... good friday... not good at all... still must go back band... got syf performance at Republic poly... anyways... not feeling well today... vomited again... stomach cramps again....
9 Apr 2009
got my PW results!!! OMGOMGOMG our class is the only class all get A xia... haha.... anyways.... today laopei birthday... went hougang mall eat ichiban sushi... food sux... lol ever since ive been to japan twice last year.... i kinda hate jap food that are sold in SG.... it just kinda suck....
8 Apr 2009
Haiz... oh well.... nth to say much.... just wana say that im very in a bad mood today... started off with PE... duno wad kinda stupid sport touch rugby is.... forgot to do physics stuff... was hoping to get sent out so that got 2 hr break.... but he today duwan send me out zzz 1 hr break... go com lab... so sad alot restrictions now... all ty to some bugger who got caught playing pet society on facebook... slp during GP lect... no one say nid print notes so i bo notes... gp tutorial... gopal slacked... so i on ipod listen and slp... maths... heng i finish tutorial.... den during band... got kinda pissed off.... lucky during sect got jokes and laughter to chill down... if not i sure explode le.... haiz... i oso duno wad i pissed about... oh well... prob its just stress... things arent going very well anyways... carrot didi aint gona forgive me yet... syf is coming..... mid year exam coming... have to prove myself that my hardwork will pay off... that my didis can do well in their exam and prob get into a better class next year... some people spreading rumours about me... must i really show u a girlfriend to proof that im not gay mar? ive told u b4 the reason i duwan to have one.... its cos i still cant control my relationship well... i duwan the girl to be hurt or sad.... i wan my girl to be the most blessed girl in the world.... thats y i think im not ready yet... i know tht u may hate my actions... but u shouldnt go around spreading false rumours... afterall ur a catholic.... rmb the commandments.... thou shall not bear false witness against thy neighbour... and afterall this is the month of lent... i thought its time for us to forgive and forget... but i guess your hatred for me aint gona change... but even if u hate me so much... you dun have to go around trying to make friendships sour... it aint gona work... thru my whole life.... ive seen many people... but those who are able to accept who i really am... are those that are true to me... yes although the number is small.... at least they dun backstab me and hate me for my "uniqueness"... they help me to change.... well maybe its gods plan that we arent meant to be together...
7 Apr 2009
Lessons was boring as usual... i brought 2 hps today... cos i scared not enough batt to sms lol... after school went to find piggy... haiz... on the way to find him... was dam sad... i started tearing... oso duno y.... anyways.... met the usual mssmb peeps... but only like half came... duno where the rest went to... and yeah i went to back gate bustop to pull piggy go mac with us... den after that they suddenly say wan go hg mall.. lol...anyways ate pepper lunch with them... and den saw SSB people again... saw piccolo boiboi lol... i lend him my syf score... he see liao say i xiao... lol... aiya nth much... consoled alvin... something wrong is about to happen.... well not actually... its alrdy happening... right AL? play rappelz so much... den when u playing halfway got somone come ks and bully u rite? den wad happen ar? u kena PK ar? lose till dam bad rite? den honour points drop ar? xiao liao ar... den how? gm ask u not to mix aroun with them liao ar? ho sei... gm sux to the core xia.... wad a nub gm.... so how? u gona cont wih your manhood go find that person? or u gona run like a dog around the gm? lol.. ask the gm go eat shit die can? oh well.... sad ar AL *winks* haha guess only SAS me and AL know what i toking about... LOL...
6 Apr 2009
today nth much... skiped thru school... dam tiring... no one sms... only dumbdumb once in a while... and huiyee jie oso... after school sim did sms me... so did dumbdumb... until at 5pm... i went to hg mall find them... alot ppl came oso... syakir syabil carrot didi... den we sit that toktok crapcrap... den piccolo boiboi and russeal and gang came =) lalala russeal go cut hair... he looks like an idiot when he admiring himself in the mirror... lalala went piccolo boiboi peied me all the way... den i took mrt home... lalala... piggy slp 8pm lol... so early.... haha i finish my joshua ang show and hw den hug u to slp k ^^
5 Apr 2009
things are not getting better... its getting worse... went to the library today to be alone.... reading the book... suddenly it mentions about carrot.... and HIS name.... den suddenly somone beside toks about carrots.... and i duno y i keep hearing about carrot today.... was dam sad this morning... haiz... i really duno wad to do.... =( im trying my best to change.... but things still doesnt go right....
4 Apr 2009
Haiz i as reading sing to the dawn.. something popped out... When u go beyond suffering, u learn to stop wanting things... you realise that nothing we see touch or feel lasts forever... flowers die... people pass on... In the end you lose the thing that makes u happy... Nothing lasts forever.... So whats the point of going through life... When at last... its always the end of fragile happiness... Why bother to hold on to something thats gona end anyway... Why try cluthing on to a passing shadow? =/ now do u understand y i love and care for u so much? Do u know y i treated u so much more than a friend? cos to me... ur my bro... ur part of my family... who cares if we arent blood related... to me u r always my didi.... Yes i do know that someday our paths will seperate.... but during the time our paths are still crossed... i wana love u as much as i can....
3 Apr 2009
haiz... went for mssmb syf today... they played very well xia.... much better than the otehr performances before lor... walao... supposed to get silver de... stupid judge pajiao lar... give bloody bronze... haiz... serious lar everyone did their best.... even junhui boiboi played his solo so well... today leh went to mss after school... den folo them go SCH.... joseph came with me too... pigy didi was dam nervous just now xia... when i hugged him b4 the syf can feel his heart beating on my chest de lol... and yeah afer the syf.... i think his heart still very fast... cos i was hugging him too lol... on the bus home.... i hugged and slp on him lol... shh.... =p i duno lar.... but i he today seem to treat me very well... only after syf.... we pack up wan go eat... den he pangseh me... go eat with cute didi xia... sobs... anyways i went to hg mall.... den at 7pm... i went back nanyang... had meet the parents... haiz... im so confused now..... he suddenly toked to me.... i duno what to say.... and carrot didi still not toking to me... haiz.... piggy didi.... i love u so much...
2 Apr 2009
When She Loved Me
When somebody loved me, everything was beautiful Every hour we spent together, lives within my heart And when she was sad, I was there to dry her tears And when she was happy, so was i, when she loved me.
Through the summer and the fall, we had each other, that was all Just she and I together, like it was meant to be And when she was lonely, I was there to comfort her And I knew that she loved me.
So the years went by, I stayed the same And she began to drift away, I was left alone Still I waited for the day, when shed say "i will always love you."
Lonely and forgotten, never thought she�d look my way, She smiled at me and held me, just like she used to do, Like she loved me, when she loved me
When somebody loved me, everything was beautiful, Every hour we spent together, lives within my heart When she loved me.
2 Apr 2009
today went back to band... i asked sotong and dumbdumb pei me go... den mr aw saw and scolded us.... im sry for causing the trouble... i din know that u all got college day rehearsal.... den fel angry so she went home... sim and i waited for them to come out... so yeah we went to hg mall... aiya chaotic xia.... we din eat together... some of us run to LJS... some went pepper lunch... and the others duno go where.... and yeah i was with piggy... haha.... he ar... getting more naughty xia.... keep poking me non stop xia..... haha.... love u piggy!!! and den mr aw and goh came hg mall... den chaos again... so me and quekquek go pei sim... den lata lemuel came.... den we went to playground.... super high xia!!! ohya piggy went home le he say tired wana slp ^^ nitenite sleeptight loveyou everynite ^^
1 Apr 2009
HAppy april fool's day to all... aint a very happy one for me... duno y i couldnt concentrate during lessons today... had 2 tests... think i did them badly.... im still brooding over some issues bah.... without solving them... guess i wun be happy for a while.... hey piggy didi... i promised i wun go emo rite? so yeah i wun k? and to carrot didi.... the reason why i need u badly... its cos to me you are somone special... which means you cant be replaced in my heart... and so are the 3 people i "demanded" for... im trying desperately to get them back... because all 3 of them mean alot to me... ok if im asking for too much.... den i shall stop bah.... since its hurting so many people.... and i dun meant to ask for other ppl pity... im just looking for somone i can tok to... and now i know that ive got the wrong ppl.... i really nid somone to understand me.... yes i nid terribly.... im sick of toking to bears and having no response.... and i dun understand whats still keeping me living.... when i last thought about what keeps my life going... it was this family of mine.... i did whatever i can for this family... y did i study so hard? i want to make money when i work.... so that i can support my didis who cant get into university because of financial probs... if better still get a scholarship now so that i may use the univsersity expenses my parents have saved for me to lend them... and when carrot didi said to me that day that if he couldnt get into a university... he would live off me.... and this makes me think about studying harder even more... i dun mind being "used" by my family members... as long as they are happy... so will i.... somone asked me y i try so hard to help others... even if they dun appreciate what i do.... but i told him.... it doesnt matter if he appreciates or not... to me if an action helps improve somone's life.... it is worth doing... and den somone asked me again.... u keep thinking of others... changing your life because of others... u will nev feel happy... den y tough do u still do that... my reason is simple..... as long as my family is happy in life.... nothing else really matters... i really do love my didis... my jie meis and kor... and i really do hope to see everyone back with me again.... carrot didi... i know that a simple sry wun make u forgive all those that happened... but still i wana apologise for making u unhappy... even if u lose your trust in me.... i just wana let u know... i love u... and i will do all i can to get u back again... i know now is not the rite time... with syf and exams around the corner.... but i hope that im able to change for u.... just give me some time.... i promise i will change de... do u know that everytime i happen to walk by a churh? i enter and pray? there 3 things i always pray for... that there is peace and harmony.... that god will ans the prayers of those in need of his mercy.... and that this family will be forever happy... and we will be family forever... when i say family... i really do mean it... i do consider all my gans as my real life family.... ive never considered them as a friend b4... to me they are the family i have... and i will do what i can for all of them...
31 Mar 2009
haiz... i duno y... i just keep hurting those people around me... ive been trying to look from other people's point of view... trying to see how others feel... but i still cant understand... y isit that i still hurt people so much... i never wanted to be someone who is self centred... who thinks his always right... im trying to do things based on other's feelings as well... and apparently its not working... and i duno y.... i just end up hurting others more.... am i really just blind? haiz... carrot didi.... im sry i ended up hurting u because of my blindness =( and to dominic.... haiz... im trying to change for u... y cant u give me another chance as a friend? must u hate me so much? what have i done to u? i just treated u as a bro and best friends... y must u treat me back this way? haiz... im trying desperately to change myself for those around me... because i know that i love them... and i hope to be closer to them....
30 Mar 2009
Haiz... carrot didi... i understand wad u mean.... thkx for telling me that.... yeah i know my attitude that i hate myself... sometimes i keep thinking im always rite... im sry about that... ive been trying to change that for very long le.... but it still appears sometimes but not as frequent anymore... i promise to change and take that off... another thing is that.... well sometimes i depend on people alot... especially when i feel helpless... in life u cant always depend on ourself... there are times that u have to depend on others.... u know it yourself.... there are times u have to depend on others but u dunno who to trust... and sometimes i depend too much on others that i duno how to walk myself... yes im sry for that.... i know that i have to change myself.... im trying to.... but i nid support from u... cos u r my family... u know that i love u alot... so pls dun leave me alone =(
29 Mar 2009
went to school today... had my napfa test... not bad i passed... but im still not happy.... i duno whats wrong with my life.... its getting totally screwed up... especially since i enter JC.... i start losing friends... especially my loved ones... losing them like machiam fk like that... one by one all start leaving me... and no one bothers to even tell me what happen... just start ignoring or disappearing... and here i am.... alone and uncared for.... haiz... its not like i can read minds rite? and god crates everyone with imperfection to let us improve... but y isit that its always becos of imperfection that cause me all my loved ones? i know my attitude.... and i really nid somone to help change it.... but no ones willing to.... everyone just start walking off once they figured this out... carrot didi... pls... i really nid u to help me... pls dun leave me like that.... i know i may have let u down lots of times.... but im willing to change... =( so please help me.... haiz.... i met mr Zuan (i duno how spell his name) just now... he told me... u cant expect life to be always happy.... if life is all about fun.... den u cant taste life... ups and downs in life adds color to it.... haiz... i duno what to say... i rather have no taste of life den to lose the people i love.... haiz... i always prayed for somone who cares and love me.... but everytime when somone appears... the next moment he/she leaves... i duno wad to do now... im at a lost....
i met with mssmb peeps at nite... haha they tried to cheer me up... we played blackjack... just now i was crying.... i lie on piggy shoulder =( and i vomited 10 times oso.... den purple say i pregnant lol... idiots....
29 Mar 2009
hey carrot didi... ive never ever in my life treated u as a substitute.... the reason why i couldnt spend time with u last time... its cos i had to split my time out too much... so i spent very lil time with u... this i apologise... but now.... i just wana spend my time with u and piggy... i just wana be closer to u as a friend and bro... when i said i love u... i really meant it... i know sometimes my attitude sucks.... but i seriously nid people like u to help me change... haiz... i know whats happened has happened... and i dun expect u to forgive me for what i did.... but i just hope that u will still cont to be beside me...
28 Mar 2009
haiz. worse day of my life. first its band. i think im gona get kicked out of syf. second. somone come some spam montfort band blog. i ask them to stop spamming. i kena scolded. den big quarrel. now i oso duno wad. wan settle properly den people start shoot hokkien things out. so im the one who started the whole prob. i nid time to reflect on what happen today. sry for the quarrel... just hope u will forget everything as well.... and yeah jonathan. sry for draggin u into this whole thing. and sry for asking u to help me everytime. haiz. i feel that im not really doing a good job as your kor.. maybe its cos of my stress from band and school work bah. i hope u will forgive me oso. im sry =( sry to sim's frend for all the probs caused... and yeah jonathan. sry for draggin u into this whole thing. and sry for asking u to help me everytime. haiz. i feel that im not really doing a good job as your kor.. maybe its cos of my stress from band and school work bah. i hope u will forgive me oso. im sry =( sry to sim's frend for all the probs caused... haiz. one big thing comes another. should i just let everything go by? or maybe i should just leave and never return.... haiz.... i cant think.... im at a daze...
just toked to dumbdumb... she advised me to just let everything go... fine.... i shall just put everything off... dumbdumb u help me tok to your zharbor bah... hopefully she understands... tmr leh... i shall go for my napfa test... after that i go back mssmb... haiz... i nid my piggy....
the quarrels in going at no end... i alrdy apologised at 3 blogs... this blog... jonathan's blog and mssmb blog... and no one's gona take the apology... i duno wad to do.... sry dumbdumb for asking u help me oso... if u and your zhabor got probs between yourself... its gona be my fault again =(
27 Mar 2009
hehe today school only 2 lessons... not counting PE.... Pe leh... i slacked around toktok... after PE got 1 hour break.... just finished eating lor... and now awaiting for Maths to start... i just realised sia... the WC3 in com lab kena uninstalled le... thkx to noob players who are so engrossed they duno got tcher looking... ohya.... forgot to mention... i made a blog for mssmbpeeps lol... its kinda dumb... but its a platform to post pics that we have for outing lor... ~MSSMB peeps~
26 Mar 2009
haha had much fun today... seriously cant wait for school to over... miss my carrot and piggy didi so much lol... so i ran all the way to MSS as soon as it hits 3pm... dam fun xia... peiied my 2 didis during band.. after band... the whole group of us went mac... Me, piggy, carrot, syakir, syabil, Jian Zhi, Ryan, Eugene, Nicholas and Sitoh... made a whole mess xia... i started making sounds using the straw like a double reed... den lata all start folo... almost tio chased out.. den we all zao away.... den i had an idea of slacking at the fitness corner next to montfort... we went wild and crazy... took alot of photos... and i decided to call us the MSSMB peeps lol... and yeah suddenly carrot didi went emo... haiz... that stupid classmate of his... sometimes i feel like giving his classmate a big spank.... haiz... den yeah i hugged piggy b4 i went home.. den i went for a night swim... and finally Ah LAo aka jian wen chatted with me on MSn xia... so long nev tok liao haha.. duno y suddenly i toking to all my 4E1 peeps ^^
25 Mar 2009
wow i realised that my dates have jumped from mar to may lol... and no one ever tell me.... guess that my readers are sotongs? lol... anyways... im feeling very blue today... prob cos of last nite again... and yeah i had a dream last nite.... i dreamt of my darling didi again... i duno y i hugged him a kept crying.... haiz... maybe i miss him alot =( yeah i do.... haven really been with him for many months... even recently... although i see him during band.. i dun really tok to him... haiz... life just sux... i cant manage my time with my loved ones properly... =(
24 Mar 2009
haiz... another person say that i bug him too much... just sounds like HIM =( haiz... carrot didi... am i really so irritating mar... =( haiz... im somone that needs constant attention from people.. not relaly those type of irritating attention seekers... but i just nid to feel love and care... and obviously thats not what im feeling now....
23 Mar 2009
ohman today was fun!! at 10am i went out to kopitiam to eat lunch... came back at near 11... suddenly got stomach ache so i went to toilet puttputt... den i plug ipod to my ear.... the fire alarm went off... and it couldnt be heard.... it was so soft till the PA system announed "all stuff and students we are having a fire drill now" LOL... and i couldnt hear it too... so if the fire was real... i would be roasted piggy ^^ i was on my way down to the LT when i saw so manypeople in the field... den i realised there was a fire evacuation drill lol... was so hot... melted badly.... but heng missed lesson.... the school still give us break till 1230 xia... so means i got 2 and half hr break muhahaha.... throughout the break i was toking to diedre jie.. she was like i had dirrhoea... and i was like yeah rite... obviously take MC pon school de =) band after school... after band... i called carrot didi... thot they just finish band den jio him go walkwalk.... as usual he chionged home lol... and when i call he gave me afunny reply... Me: Hello? J: Ya? Me: YA! J: WHo u? Me: Me LAR!!! J: WHO??? Me : ME LAR u duno who mare? J: WHO U XIA??? Me : Rainald lar lol.... he funny xia... i thot his hp got caller id still duno who me mare? dotz... anyways... i very bored today... chatted with jun hui by sms... his so pek cek cos something happened... cant say w/o his permisson =X ohya i had another F&N grape stuck in the freezer again... but this time it din bloat up... it just exploded when i try to open it lol.... anwyays... carrot didi... the DT or whoever in your class... just ignore him... his not worth to be angry about... dun let a fker spoil ur day =) as for your lost pencil case... try go general office ask see if they got lost and found... but obviously in montfort its lost and unfound de ^^ just give it a try anyways... see if there are any kind souls left in montfort... i dun think there are any since i left *grins* jk lar... lastly... "i cant trust anyone anymore" didi ar... u can still trust me and count on me de.... wadeva happens... i will be beside you always =) so smiles k? dun let small things affect ur mood ^^
23 Mar 2009
oh well... been having unsteady feelings since ytd... lots of things happened.... im not gona list the unhappy ones... just gona say that... i kena the same things as carrot didi about the gaming thingy... "play play play whole day only know how play" wth man... i study from evening till nite.... nev even rest... now i play they kpkb.... "i nev seen anyone like u.. duno u taking A level or wad" they said that to me during my O's.. in the end oso pass.... den they start saying about sending me to IMH.... cool xia... carrot didi... we stay in the same ward k? den can pei each other liaox ^^
22 Mar 2009
Hey carrot didi... i was listening to your song while i was in the car... been thinking about it all day... just wana let u know that... i will be that guardian angel for u.... i will always be there for u if u nid me.... im a 24/7 helpline... whenever u nid me just find me.... i will go all the way to you even if u are on the other side of the world... and i wouldnt mind giving up my life just to protect u.... pls do know that i will support u no matter what happens... I will never let you fall I'll stand up with you forever I'll be there for you through it all Even if saving you sends me to heaven Seasons are changing And waves are crashing And stars are falling all for us Days grow longer and nights grow shorter but i will never leave you alone =) if u have any probs be it sch, friends, family... u can always come to me..... i will lend u a shoulder or a hug if u nid ^^ bros this life, bros for life =) didi... i may not mean much to u... but to me... ur my everything...
21 Mar 2009
Today band exchange.. nothing much.. just surprised to see SSB people there watching... after exchange i went to amk hub... den saw mr goh they all.. den i pop in his car go PS eat with them.. nothing much... dota now....
20 Mar 2009
went to MSSB today... was dam funny lar... they all go bully jun ming... cos he last time bully my carrot didi... den alot ppl oso dun like him... den lunch... he nev ask us buy for him... nev on hp... lemuel had a nice idea xia... dog food ^^ went 7 eleven... only found whiskas... eh high grade xia dam ex... anyways... jun ming kena embarrased in front of whole band... and he sit one corner emo... lol... and i just realised it was 1pm... den nyjc band starts at 1... so obviously was late... den after band... was emo... so i went back to find carrot... he was at hg mall... once in a lifetime... his phone worked lol... reached home... carrot didi jio me go dota with him... haha played dota... den spongbob? lol... didi kser xia.... keep ksing my lina.... very funny.... anyways.... ty carrot didi.... love u lots...
19 Mar 2009
went to mssmb today... woke up in the morn... and i recieved an sms from piggy asking me to go lol... yeah i did go... spent most of my time with carrot didi again.... haha... today mr aw asked them to rest in the band room for 15min... den carrot didi was lying beside me... den suddenly he sit on top of me... den lie on me.... and i just realised how heavy he was lol... but i tickled him and managed to pin him down... and tickled him till he went crazy again lol... hapened 3 times.... and everytime he lie on top of me.. i did scream... cos i duno y? lol... it just felt ticklish ^^ den when ppl ask.... i was like... i got raped by jonathan... haha... lol... after band.. went pepper lunch (alien was like... u guys come again?)... as usual... things like... eh how u escape from area 51? and men in black sunglasses!! omg i spot an alien!!! haha.... piggy came with us as well.. cos i dragged him there ? xbleahx....
during my shower.... i was reflecting again.... i was thinking... how short life is... theres so many things i wana do... but theres only so little things i can do.... i wana be with the people i love forever... but it seems impossible... first that someone... den my best friend.... joon.... den my darling... my cute didi... my kor... my jie... my 4 meis... den my baobei... the list of people leaving me goes on... i dun think i wana list everything... cos at this point im alrdy crying again.... i just wana tell all my loved ones... thank you for being that special person in my heart for me... i hope you guys will continue leading a happy life without me.... to those who are still with me... piggy and carrot didi.... i do wish that we can be together forever... but im not sure how long more i can last.... what i want now is to spend the rest of my days with you guys... and hope that it will be a memorable and happy one... thank you for spending your time with me... please do remember that our life once crossed each other's path in a simple place called montfort military band...
18 Mar 2009
ok i just found out today pr bdae lol... my ahgong was like... eh today ur bdae hor?...
in the morn i went for mssmb.... ok lar pei carrot and piggy didi... nth much lor slacked alot... den ate lunch with perc section.. stupid lemuel keep making me laugh... sads den have to go for nyjc band.. suddenly got big headache.. had to ask for medicine lol.... anyways ren till the whole band prac... after band.... went to sizzler at toapayoh... darling always eat there at his bdae... he says very nice... but i think its horrible lol... maybe i had too much share of good food.. maybe i should into him better ones haha... anyways the cake PR have sux alot... worse cake i ever had in my life... seriously feel like puking... anyways... i kena laughing fits just now... stupid PR.... make me laugh at his sick jokes... den i alrdy having breathing difficulty... he still chase after me.... wad an ass... anyways tmr i going back mssmb again... haha.... sry lar carrot didi... its not i wana pei pigy and pangseh u de.. i really love all of u equally de... just gimme time to split my love between all of u k? haha =)
17 Mar 2009
today i woke up very early... cos piggy say wana come my house... icos his an early waker... who knows he slps so much during the hols... i woke him up by 3 miss calls and 5 smses at 10am lol.... he came about 11+.... den we sort of played dota and CS... ok nth much bah... i just wana spend some time with him thats all... ok sry to my classmates for not going to today's outing at sentosa... hoped u guys have an enjoyable day.... im having a hard time managing my relationships now... i hope u guys understand =( ok... i did study today as well.. made a promise to my carrot didi that i will work hard... and so i will ^^ prob gona cut down on many ther things now... once syf is over.... im gona have more free time... mostly would be studies and teaching my didis bah... so that piggy can go to express... cute didi can do well in his o's.... and carrot didi and darling to get by their sec 3.... and elaine mei too... hope she can get into a good class for her next year... and ya im gona let everything else pass bah ^^ till after my A's...
ty piggy for being with me today... appreciate your company... love you... huggies ^^
feeling dam sick after piggy left... headache.... diarrhoea... fever... feeling very weak now.... cant even move about.... my mind cant tink... i think i prob go slp le bah.... nitez.....
ok couldnt slp... suddenly felt dam hot.. played dota... and was reading blog... my specs suddenly broke.... literally into 2 pieces by the nose there... so now i have to use a spare specs..... prob i be using contacts for the next few days.... den suddenly 2 ppl add me on msn.... ben tan from trumpet and jun hui my flute junior... den i was chatting with them.... went to junhui blog.... his song super emo xia... make me go emo!! u so vad xia junhui!! grr.... jkjk haha... not your fault lar... bu u make sure u dun go emo till u make suicide pact hor!! if not i bite u ar!!
16 Mar 2009
ok first day of school hols... guess wad i did? haha... went back to school at 830 for more maths =.= 1030 maths finish.... rushed to mssb... cos they got band exchange today... i thot i was late... chiong bus there... den i saw nicholas cheong at the traffic light with his mac... so i guessed im still early... cos darling didi told me report to band at 1030... den i when i was there they asked me go eat lunch den 1215 bus zao... went to the new store that sells chicken rice... the food sux terribly.... anyways... i went back to school... guess wad? i saw bing xiang... derek ng... and whos that guy again? ok i forgot his name... din get to see clifford... sads... miss him alot =( ok today band went to hwa chong... the place dam big xia... and den i was wearing half uniform there... so i looked like a HCI student oso ^^ cos nyjc pants and HCI got same pants... anyways... spent most of my time with carrot didi today... was siting beside him and chatting with him the whole day... got lots of fun and laugh haha... sry piggy didi i pangseh u today... cos the seat next to u always empty den cant sit beside u =( den nothing much.... just hear them play... den mssb play... den zao back... on the way back.. on the bus was dam funny... carrot didi listening to music... and used my right hand as a drum pad... guess wad? my hand was red from swelling =.= and lemuel was a bastard xia.... go disturb jun ming lol.... he keep saying wad ur brain 2% school stuff 49% bastardy stupidity idiocity and 50% f*** ur mum till both get aids, butt s** ur dad till he kena aids den all die... den jun ming pek cek run infront.... lol den me and carrot didi was laughing like mad... and its the first time i seen carrot didi laughed so much ^^ den after that lemuel sit beside jun ming... den he was like allah allah allah.... and was swinging his arms around to purposely hit jun ming... den jun ming ran to aw and complain... lol... wad a noob =.= after that carrot didi say he wan hg mall buy games... ask me pei him go there and pepper lunch... den i dragged pigy along oso... stupid xia carrot didi and ryan both run so fast.. den duno where they go.... me and piggy went down to pepper lunch and up to the game store 3 times... and in the end carrot didi called me say they waiting at pepper lunch.... another funny thing... we saw jian hao the alien today... he working at pepper lunch... and i was dam evil.... i made fun of him ^^ i was like.... OMG i see alien!! den i went to the counter and told his colleague... eh theres an alien beside u!!! MUHAHAHA den i asked alien.. eh where u UFO? the round round TITITITI thingy... den everyone was like laughing dam badly... after dinner... before we stepped out of the shop.. i was like can u gimme an alien pop? den we all zao far far... lol.... and first time i saw piggy laugh ike mad oso lol... yeah i treated piggy to curry beef today... and i had to borrow 2 $ from him to pay cos i not enough lol... one last fact.. i just got 30$ for my weekly allowance... and at the end of the da... my wallet is empty again =) den after dinner we saw goh aw and SSB peeps at macdonalds... den first thing i saw jin ting... den i laughed at her.. she was like... eh y u see me first thing den laugh liao.... i was like.... cos u laugh dam funny hahaha.... anyways... nth much... went home with piggy by bus... and got a whack by carrot didi before he went into the mrt lol... yeah!!! piggy coming my hse tmr ^^ sobs carrot didi duwan come... he say me hse nth to do =(
15 Mar 2009
went church today in the morning... after that came home for lunch... den went back to the stupid IT fair again... this time its worse... super pack.... worse than ytd... bought meself an external hard disc 640gb... my 320 and 80 gb de finish le... den buy new earpiece... went to waraku @ clarke quay... dam nice xia the food... ate myself 2 main course and 4 side dishes... its not a small portion hor... the portion very the big.... haha... ok now im home... gona slp le.. nitez piggies =)
14 Mar 2009
had band in the morning... stupid xia... band starts at 10... i reached there at 8... so i had self practise... den at about 9 i went out eat breakfast at serangoon central... after my bee hoon... i slacked at one of the playground near school... felt very helpless again.... i was thinking of lots of things... and den i din felt like going off... but was about to be late so i had to go.... after band leh... actually wanted to go home... sim asked me to go suntec with her and other mssmb peeps... wasnt really interested in going bah.... cos that day i asked carrot didi... he say he duwan go.... but in the end he went.. so i dragged myself there reluctantly... went to meet them at kovan at kfc... fel sim joel and sitoh was there too... all of us went suntec accept fel... eee fel u pangseh kia xia ^^ IT fare was crowded.... squeexed like mad... sitoh and joel bought one ipod each... sitoh apparently bought a purple one... and his shirt oso purple xia... so i decided to call him purple boy!!! haha... den joel was like... sitoh u wear purple inside oso rite ^^ walked out of the hall... was dam tired... about to drop down liao... den they say wan watch movie... bought 5 tickets of journey to witch mountain... not a bad show.... but not really action-packed oso... went to arcade play... carrot didi crazy de xia... play drum mania like some xiao kia leh... i see liao my jaw drop.... so dam pro xia... tried guitar freaks.... kena owned by him badly... played datona with joel... lost to him by 1 metre... dam it!!! but carrot didi lost to him oso.... den joel left 1 coin.. we decided to play bishi bashi special.. dam stupid xia... at first carrot didi was winning... joel dying le... den duno y all 3 of us die together... my hand was aching dam badly after that lar... apparently carrot didi wasnt sitting with me in cinema today... he sat beside joel cos both like salted poppy... i sat beisde purple boy cos we share sweet poppies ^^ at first carrot didi ask me to sit beside him... den i was like nvm lar u sit there lor... i sit with purple boy... den duno why during the show... he suddenly sit in the empty sit beside me lol... after the show leh... he went back with his parents... den the 4 of us took mrt back... i got a crazy idea lar... i was like instead of taking mrt to sengkang(me) and hougang (sim and purp) y not lets take mrt with joel to pasir ris and eat there... purple boy was like... walao... im dying liao lor... haha...sry lar... i hungry mar ^^ i ate ban mian... cos i walked 2 rounds duno wad to eat... den we chatchat... den take 88 back home... i think carrot this few days very sot xia... ytd at mac he come and tell me... eh u know hor _____.... i was like... eh i was in the car when mr aw told us that... den we started laughing at him lol... today more funny... he drumming halfway... den i stand at the side.... i look at him... den i smile... den he smile... den i start laughing.... den he laughed until he stage fail lol... he dam cute xia... haha... especially when he smile and laugh lol.... alrites im going to lala land with piggy didi le cyas
13 Mar 2009
today leh no lessons again... den hor digipen came our school... so i decided to stay just for carrot didi bah... got the brouchures and stuff for him.... den i went home.... found out no key so run to mum's office take... changed and bathed... den read my book.... after that i run back to montfort... piggy say he wana go with me lata for the concert ^^ ok slacked and joked around with the peeps... went to macdonald for dinner.... cos carrot didi want go there.... so me and piggy folo him go.... and carrot asked me the question again.... "eh if i dun go uni hor... i feed on u k =)" den i was like... "i think u got a better chance to go digipen den me going any uni... i should be feeding on u =)" suddenly carrot didi say he tagging with us to ssb performance... i was like... lol? i thot he ytd say duwan go de.... den we went 7 eleven buy choc for SSB peeps... i got 3 bars of meiji milk choc.... den we WALKED from mss to SSS.... and thruout the walk it was dam funny... both piggy and carrot keep giving me trick questions... lol... ok at this point my mood was dam high... haha love u 2 =) haiz... i wish we could pei each other like this forever... alrite reached the hall.... was late by 5 min... den i bo liao fold paper.... cos alot of itenary paper... carrot dump all onto my leg lol.... i folded an aeroplane for carrot didi... he wanted it... i folded a boat and a heart for piggy didi... den joel took the heart from piggy... den he ask me make more.... so he can give jin ting rite? hor???? muhahaha... den after the band performance alvin sabo shout for jin ting... den joel dam paiseh haha.... after the whole concert leh... went to supper with my 2 didis... tough we din eat anything... we drank haha... ya and i was dam tired.... duno y lar... im dam sleepy these few days.... maybe too much stress... so i lie on piggy shoulder and slp.... after dinner carrot didi went home with his parents le... den mr aw they all sit outside play truth or dare... heng ar nev join in ^^ alot sick stuff.... yalor stupid russeal... duno wad kiss here kiss there... and all the eeew things... piggy crazy ask me to join... lol... den yeah stay there till quite late... den me drag piggy home ^^ haha... ty piggy and carrot didi for peing me today ^^
12 Mar 2009
oh well having my break again... today mr SIM nev come sch... den got replacement tcher... and hor i think she teach much better xia.... to me... her method of teaching is easier to understand lor... anyways.... nth much more... just that im preety bored today... no band at MSS cos they got half day today... sianz... and the stupid computer got so many restrictions now.... all thkx to those idiots... use facebook and watch youtube infront of the stupid old man... see lar now everything banned... no more facebook.... now left blog and msn and email... and yeah prob dota lol... they so stupid... WC3 installed here for how many mths liao... and they dun even know... since last year i think... lol...wad a noob...
my mind in a blur again... very stressed... trying to balance school with family with band with church..... haiz... im going crazy soon =( theres so many things i wana do... but theres only so much i can do =( im going emo again.... my life seems to get worser by the minute.... i just dun feel happy... im trying my best to be with those i love.... im trying my best to get along with them better... but it just dun seem to work.... everyones turning away.... i just dun know what to do anymore... i feel like just giving up everything... and going back to what i was last time... to have nothing at all....
called darling didi... its been ages since we toked... really wana get back to him =( and i duno lar i cried alot while toking to him... and den he mentioned HIM... and i cried even more... haiz =( and yeah i hope i can patch things up with my darling too.... and i duno why my darling so fond of homer simpsons? lol... and yeah all those in NYJC... mr nawandni do looks more and more like homer lol!!! ▒▒▒▒▒▓ ▒▒▒▒▒▒▓ ▒▒▒▒▒▒▓ ▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓ ▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓ ▒▓▓▓▓▓▓░░░▓ ▒▓░░░░▓░░░░▓ ▓░░░░░░▓░▓░▓ ▓░░░░░░▓░░░▓ ▓░░▓░░░▓▓▓▓ ▒▓░░░░▓▒▒▒▒▓ ▒▒▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▓ ▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓ ▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▓ ▒▒▒▒▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓ ▒▒▒▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓ ▒▒▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓ ▒▓▒▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓ ▒▓▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓ ▒▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓ ▒▒▓▒▒▒▒▒▓
11 Mar 2009
sobs... im really very tired... wana slp... but cant... haiz... carrot didi seems very cold towards me last nite........ i dam scared he will ignore me oso... he tok to me like so pekcek... haiz... i just scared he will end up like HIM... =( i cant risk losing another loved one... haiz... didi... im sry if i did anything to make u angry... if theres anything wrong with me pls tell me bah... i just wana defend u.... cos u my didi mar.... haiz... well if that bothers u.... den fine lor... i shall rmb not to do that again lor... =/ just stop me whenever u think im too much...
ok my apologies to sim and carrot didi for last nite... paiseh i think i probably pmsing..... was too stressed by on going things... haiz... =(
just finished sch.... going for band soon... anyways we did a stupid survey by MOE just now.... dam funny xia... the question was like... I do not say jokes about other races - Strongly Disagree I do not laugh when jokes about other races are said - Strongly Disagree I get angry when my friends jokes about races - Strongly Disagree I am proud to be Singaporean - Disagree
lols... i mean like im not racist... but i think theres nth wrong with racist jokes lar... even individual races do joke about themselves wad... so y cant other races joke about each other? and yeah i think singapore is fine.... but i dun feel proud... firstly cos of the unque singaporean chracters... e.g Kiasu, chao kuan etc.... well maybe cos im too ang moh pai bah.... hahas... ok anyways be back home late... after band going church for SALT thingy ^^
just came back from church haha ^^ ok im so tired wana slp liao snorezzzz
10 Mar 2009
ohwell.... having a 3 and half hr break here... thot of going orchard at first.... but dam lazy walk to mrt lolz... ok y 3and half hr? the time table says maths 1hr followed by 1 hour civics tutorial... and 1 and half hour common lunch break... what did we learn from maths? how to play toto.... the crazy teachers used toto and taught us statistics... lol... not bad... but it seems that not everyone is learning... cos everyone is chit chatting and betting toto for the sake of fun lol... nice way to pass 1 hr of time... den civics leh... changed into a life skill workshop.. wanted to go for the sushi one... but all spaces have been take up for all courses... left the hall which is supposed to be financial literacy... somehow i went to attend it last year... so i find no point in doing so... den i went to kopitiam outside school as usual... take a bite b4 all chiong out during common lunch break... as usual... many ppl pon these courses.... macdonald was flooded... so is kfc lol... well if the sch is smart enough... they should find ways to stop ppl from ponning such courses ^^ hey but that would mean i cant pon anymore... lolz... ok now im stuck in the com lab... should i ban jia to the library? or should i go out? or should i study hehe... yeah maybe i be a good boy for a change.... should study ^^
found something on my email... makes me think of him again =(
People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. When you know which one it is, you will know what to do for that person. When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed. They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, To aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually. They may seem like a godsend and they are. They are there for the reason you need them to be. Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time, This person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand. What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled, their work is done. The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time to move on. Some people come into your life for a SEASON, because your turn has come to share, grow or learn. They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh. They may teach you something you have never done. They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy. Believe it, it is real. But only for a season. LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons, Things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. Your job is to accept the lesson, Love the person and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life. It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.
9 Mar 2009
ok im in the computer lab again.... nth much to do lar... just spamming ppl on msn... so few ppl on9... looks like conductors got gd life xia... can slp so much like a pig... mr goh lor... i on9 first thing see him on9 liao... anways... im quite bored... been smsing acidic sotong the whole morn... and yeah im still desperately waiting for school to end... hahahas.... and yes jin ting stop spreading about what hapened on sat alrdy... its not funny...
this is what i read on my email today... sort of knocked my head abit...
Read Each One Carefully & Think About It a Second or Two 2. No man or woman is worth your tears, & the one who is, won't make you cry. 3. Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to, doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have. 4. A true friend is someone who reaches for your hand & touches your heart. 5. The worst way to miss someone is to be sitting right beside them knowing you can't have them 6. Never frown, even when you are sad, because you never know who is falling in love with your smile. 7. To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world. 8. Don't waste your time on someone, who isn't willing to waste their time on you. 9. Maybe God wants us to meet a few wrong people before meeting the right one, so that when we finally meet the person, we will know how to be grateful. 10. Don't cry because it is over, smile because it happened. 11. There's always going to be people who hurt you so what you have to do is keep on trusting & just be more careful about who you trust next time around.. 12. Make yourself a better person & know who you are before you try & know someone else & expect them to know you. 13. Don't try so hard. The best things come when you least expect them to. REMEMBER: WHATEVER HAPPENS, HAPPENS FOR A REASON.
and yeah i think i screwed up this block test... managed to pass only chem... and its a pass by abit kinda pathetic marks.... was dam confused during class... duno whether to drop out to a poly... or hang on the next 6 mths.... den carrot didi told me to just hang on bah... haha fine so i promised him i shall start working hard ^^ den he was like "u better do or im gona punch u!!" "oh yeah i upgraded liao now is punch" lawls... yeah he always slap me de.... den i ask him wad if i screw my a levels.... he replied asking me to pei him go digipen =) lol... i know he has a love for games... but well ive nev tought of it b4? hahas... cos i nev considered gaming as part of my path lawls... hmmm come to mention.... maybe i could try this as well? hahas.... but its a whole new thing to me lol... okok ty carrot didi... i think im more or less stable again haha... hehe u nev fail to make me laugh even in my saddest times =) lolZZ
ok and harrold bf just smsed me saying his going to msia for 3 days... ohwell... pls enjoy and do take care... come back to me in one piece k? haha luv and miss ya =X
8 Mar 2009
argh crap the internet... took so long to make it work.. somehow my internet cock up in the morn... and i tried every way since then... last minute i pluck the whole modem out and put back... and it worked!!! and my msn... keeps giving me the host file error... took me 5min on google to fix it lolz.... ok im watching resident evil degeneration tatas...
im back home from ahma hse.... played dota with pr and cousin... now gona slp le... cya....
7 Mar 2009
ok today dam happy lar... was a last minute thingy anyways... this morn supose to run 3km at east coast park for sport carnival... den it rained... dam funny... they announced "we regret to inform u that the event has been canceles" den everyone screamed and were like HOORAY!!! went to montfort sec..... took 1 hr... stupid xia i took a bus with longer route lol... the uncle say 15min to pasir ris... it took 30 min... +30min from pasir ris to hougang... was chatting with syabil the whole prac... den after that sim ask us go hg mall eat... at the same time mr aw they all oso go... so we went tgt lor... after that leh.... they say wan go watch movie... den since carrot didi go so i pei them go oso... piggy got piano so din go... hahas.... took mr aw car to queensway cos they making band tee for SSB they all dam bad xia... keep saying bout me and SIM!!! eh me and her only friends dun anyhow say hor!!! slap u all ar!!! rawrs!!! den we went to PS watch marley and me.... the tics like selling fast so we hopped to the cathay to watch... on the way... carrot didi dared me to shout mr aw name by Winston i shout 1 time.... he din hear... den carrot didi ask me shout 2nd time.... i shouted again... this time mr aw really turn back... den i siam... so i guess he din see me... haha... den carrot didi tried oso.... but it din work lol... i owe alvin 9$ sobs... anyways... i shared a popcorn and drink and hotdog with carrot didi... i just found out he like salted and like sweet... so nvm bah just get salted.... i can eat both... and the hotdog extra long xia... and the white sauce everywhere lol... not bad very nice to eat... ty harrold for the suggestion ^^ the show was preety nice... cried at the last part ='( yes stop toking bout it alrdy... it sort of mentioned like... there will be somone special in your life... who will make u happy and special.... and yeah... i thought of him.... carrot didi was laughing at me xia.... jin ting oso cried haha.... and me and carrot didi were like throwing tissues all over the cinema lor.... duno who started first lolz... and i found out jin ting laughed dam funny lolz she laugh til i instead of laughing at the funny thing i was laughing at her laugh lolz and russeal the horny and sick guy ^^ toking bout sick stuff.... den alvin and jia le stick tgt like duno what? lolz... and basically i duno who the rest liao lolz... anyways... we crossed over to PS... walk abit and yeah home ^^
to my dearest carrot didi.... if you are reading this (yeah i know u are).... ty for keeping me happy today... just wana let u know that i love u as a bro only... nth more than that... so please dun think otherwise... and yeah rmb wad we say just now ar!!! if i fail my a lev im gona live on u le hor!!! hahaz dun u dare break your promise like him hor.... neh i trust u... u wun do this to me de hor? (yeah russeal trust not thrust) and yah i treat u like a bro... so if theres anything u dun like bout me pls just tell me... dun hide from me or scared i angry k? im open de... hahaz yeah and i really do hope we can really last forever =)
to my piglet.... im not sure if u gona read this but i will type anyways.... i love u as a bro and best friends... hope we can be BFs(best friend - im asked to write full form by carrot lol in case ppl mis unds) forever....
to my meis and jie.... i really do miss u... and hope to contact u soon... pls do contact me if u read this sobs ='(
6 Mar 2009
argh!!! i just realised i kena the stupid com with spoiled spacebar again... yikes!!! must rmb to not sit at this com again!!! haha... nth to do xia.... 1 hr break lol... and i cant enter the library.... cos im not wearing longpants.... lolz.... stupid rule xia... yeah im dam bored.... reading up on WOW stuff before i play haha...
sadded xia... just got back chinese results... it sux... ='(
5 Mar 2009
im in the com lab again.... and guess wad? im using a com that has a keyboard that does not creak like ytd!!! lol... im supposed to be studying for lata chem prac oh well.... anyways im preety bored.... so many breaks today again.... i read carrot didi blog.... sobs... i read liao heart very pain xia.... how i wished i was the one who kena bitten... and the one undergoing the injections and freezing.... haiz.... heart pain =( it must have hurt alot.... and i wished i was the one there instead of him ='( <\3 anyways im gona find him lata... i hope i dun cry when i see his hand =\
back from band.... ohwell... din really cried... but my heart dam pain when i see.... i was like biting my fingers when he showed me his hands and legs... sobs... 14 injections and so many freezings.... =( today band piggy din come... sobs wanted to hug him again lol... anyways.... after band.... i went to mac with carrot.... lol it was drizzling... and its been very long since i ever walked with somone in the rain.... felt much better tough.... slacked and chat with gary and peeps at mac... blahblahblah nth much... and im home... screwed up maths and chem... wads more to come?
well supposed to slp with piggy de... sry piggy i snucked out of bed... hope u dun mind.... alot of people having probs now... so ya gooto sort them out from their crazy minds ^^ yeahyeah me being the psycho again.... trying my best to convince elaine mei and sim..... to get themseleves back in life... and oso partly to give myself a confidence in life again... i nid somone badly... somone who will always be beside me... so whoever can be there for me... pls say "I!!" haha... ok im dam tired.... elaine just went off9 w/o saying byeS and sim have to cut off liao... so yeah im gona snuggle back under the blankie and hug my piglet again =)
4 Mar 2009
ohwell im in sch now.... supposed to be blogging earlier... but den my classmates came in wan dota.... lol nth much lar... den stupid tcher came into thelab... den all alt+f4 anyways.... im preety bored... good day today... alot of breaks haha... and yeah lata got band... so prob be home late... now dam bored xia.... i wana sleep... piggy didi.... i lie on ur lap and slp k? haha... neh i dun think he will... his having lessons oso... anyways... im feeling dam cold suddenly... think got fever again.... =p carrot didi!!! pokes lol... and im preety pissed... this keyboard sux.... the spacebarkeepsgettingSTUCK!!!
3 Mar 2009
oh me goodness.... my stomach flu came back.... dam pain.... i pop pill and went to sch.... actually want pon but mum scold me... in the end after first lesson still pain... so i went home see doc... after that leh mum said she oso on mc lol... actually wanted to pei her at home de... i very long nev be with her alone liao... but den.... msmmb got rehearsal at SCH... so i no choice but to go.... i supposed to go esplanade library de =p but i changed my route lol... i got a bit lost... alighted at raffles instead of tanjong pagar... so i took a taxi to SCH... cos i thot i super late xia... when i reached there at 1230.... they still at montfort... lol.... i should have gone there xia... den dunit rush to SCH lor... ok the prac was boring.... but the fun comes after this ^^ during the bus trip home... i hugged and lie on piggy didi shoulder haha... den some stupid people behind sabo go tell everyone see... yucks!!! den sommore when i turn away hor.... they go push my head back to his shoulder xia.... lol.... den sim called me.... she say very emo.... den she crying.... so i asked her wait outside MSS gate wait for us.... den me carrot gary sim and queky went to hogang more... piggy went home first =( den carrot didi say wana go pepper lunch... so ok lor pei him... used the last of my weekly allowance =( but nevermind lar.... he happy can liao ^^ managed to make sim happy... cos the 4 of us joke like crap... den gary loner at one corner...im sry gary.... actually not supposed to eat oily food.... but nvm lar.... if carrot didi happy nth else really matters and i even ate his portion cos he cant finish lol... i thot gona die xia... told mum i be back at1pm... and i go home eat dinner... reached home at 630 with a full stomach lol... but its ok im very happy now =) but carrot didi somehow make me think of one person.... cos he scrambled through my hp and saw her pic... my jamie mei lor.... now valerie and lingling and jolin jie comes into my mind... =( wonder where they all went to... and carort didi lor.... he was like "and now i know he really is straight" i was like wt..... haiz.... ohwell.... just leave everything to god bah... he will fix it somehow... like now... i dun really miss him so much anymore... i just realised that there are still people around me who care for me... like carrot and piggy =) luv eeu lots!!!
2 Mar 2009
at first i dam sad xia.... today in school i keep walking out of lessons and walk around the school... after 5pm i duno y suddenly became high xia..... i screamed and run out of the lecture hall!! den i went to plaza sing... bought my throwing knifes lol... wanted to buy 2.... in the end i bought one.... i was toking to sim on the phone... so she said buy 1 lar.... heng xia.... the auntie say next week got more 2 come ^^ supposed to go eat dinner with BF today... but he say he go eat with his mummy... so i went to find SIM.... ytd supposed to go find her but i dam emo... now i dam high xia... den raining... so she go take umbrella fetch me from bus stop to her hse.... she dam funny xia... bring one small umbrella for 2... and expects the both of us to squeeze into one zzz den we sat beside the pool and toked crap... she secretly take out handphone want take my pic xia... lucky i smart and fast.... i block my face b4 she take.... muhahaha anyways im back home.... im no longer that emo... haha =)
1 Mar 2009
went to church this morn... den went for SALT.... haiz... den i went emo the rest of the day... i just feel that... i dun feel loved at all.... im sry to all my loved ones for saying this... but although i know you guys love me alot... i cant feel it.... to my didis... i dun want our relationship to just be the every thurs thingy... to this special someone.... i dun wan our relationship to be just whenever we need somone thingy... to my mum and dad... i just wana let u know how much i love u... and how much u mean to me... i just hope we can spend more time with each other... just like we used to when i was younger... i really do miss the things we do together.... and to my baobei didi... if u r reading this.... just know that i will be there if u ever want to come back to me again =( i hope that this season of lent can help change us... and if possible help us remake our relationship.... i really do miss u... and i love u alot =(
28 Feb 2009
din went for band in the morning... stomach still very pain... and unfortunately... i think carrot didi kena oso... he drank my juice ytd.... im sry didi... i din know i got stomachflu.... i thot is normal stomach cramps only... im really sorry =(
went out with harrold today.... ya SIM i went out with my BF!!! went to watch pink panther 2... its dam funny... kept laughing... well i think i deserve to be happy for once =) when we bought tickets hor... the guy was like these red seats are special de... for couples only.... den we were like aiya just take lor... den that guy stared at us.... lol... sim dun anyhow think ar!!! den after that we went walk walk a bit.... den we went buy popcorn and stuff.... and harrold asked me if i have the ticks... den i was like huh? u have the tics leh!! heng xia lucky he found... i thot missing xia.... after show... we shopshop for 2hours... den went to eat at pastamania.... took 30mins for us to find something to eat lol... SIM's gona say i very picky again... LOLXXXX hahazZZZ =p anyways when i reached sengkang... it rain dam heavy... den laopei drive car go lrt fetch me lol... now im back home... trying to dota haha...
27 Feb 2009
aiyo... i this few days got stomach cramp xia... dam pain.... i think is gastric lar not cramps lol... ytd b4 physics stomach pain... went toilet wanted to puttputt... den i squat there 10 min nth come out... den i went into the exam venue with pain =( after that leh abit pain nia... this morn worse.. wake up 3 am... stomach pain... went toilet... nth again... den i keep tossing cant slp... in the end this morn... got fever.... so i guess must be gastric lor....
went to serangoon sec today.... montfort got band exchange.... went into hall... sim saw me.... i stare back... den fel came over and whispered to sim... aiya i know what they toking about lar... no nid whisper de.... den after a while mssmb ppl came... so i go pei them.... den somone keep asking me go find her... i duwan.... haha.... den throughout the whole day.... nth much lar.... but i feel very xing fu... cos i got my 2 loving didis pei me.... piggy and carrot both sit beside me.... i feel so happy and at paradise... lol sound so *ahhem*.... when SSB go perform.... i ask carrot didi that if he scared can hide behind me... he was like : "scared her for wad?" den after that sim came.... den they two dam funny... sim ran after carrot.... den he run beside me... he was like omg shes coming... den he grab my hand and hide behind... haha so funny... den i holding on to piggy de hand... carrot oso dam bad xia... i protect him... and u know what im rewarded with? pen marks all over my body with his pen... and i got a dam cute word on my left palm.... he wrote the word carrot!!! haha i took a pic of it haha got time i post it =p haha.... sianz bo sectionals.... i wana go di siao ppl de.... den after that leh.... they went home.... den i go to dinner with fel and sim... nth much lor.... i feel so extra... im felt like a stranger xia.... anyways.... nth much lar... very tired.... so came home and watch naruto... den slp liao...
26 Feb 2009
haha today finished physics at about 11... not as hard as compared to chem and maths... den after that went home.. eat lunch... den watched naruto... till 2pm.. den went montfort.... playing with carrot and syab they all... den after that piggy came... he went to investiture.. finally got long pants and counsil tie le hor? haha... and i was invited by some tchers for the food... lol i love the choc eclaires!!! haha... den carrot didi say got food nev jio him... den by the time he go down food gone le lol... den he scold me... sobs... after that i went to da bao food home... actually hor i wana eat at swimming pool there... den the stupid uncle nev gimme spoon... so i go mac buy macflurry for spoon... den i go pool wana see down... saw laopei... den no choice must go up... den i took out one can of f&n orange... stupid xia... i put wrong things into wrong place... i left the drinks into freezer and ice cream into fridge... den after my game of dota... u know wad happen liao... lol...
25 Feb 2009
cant slp lar... haha... cos slp in afternoon liao... i just found a dam nice song... its from ponyo... its on the background music....
ok i found out how to play liao... just listened and played... very easy lar the song... ohya the chem... total screw up... mind went blank suddenly... forgot everything... ok den this afternoon harrold came my hse... haha.... ate lunch at rivervale mall... den came my hse... prac we din do anything much lar.... he doing work... i fooling around on msn... was disiaoling sim..... i told her my boyfriend come my house... ask her dun disturb haha... den i say i playing with him on the bed shuush.... den she was like OMG!!! its dam funny... den after he finish his stuff... den we sort of surfed the net.... watched the stupid maple story anime on youtube... den we layed on my bed.... started toking nonsense... about bears and stuff.... den he suddenly emo =( start toking bout emo stuff.... so yeah gave him a huggy... and tried to make him happy bah =) awww sim dunit eat ethanoic acid lar k? haha ^^ and now waiting for church...
and sry pigglet today din pei u afternoon nap.... i sit beside u when u slping k? haha...
24 Feb 2009
well... maths... screwed... made alot of crap mistakes... anyways im home since 12... slept from 2 till 6.... haha piglet complain swimming pool water cold... aww =( didi i hug u k? den u wun feel cold le... haha haha.... didi u faster come home bah... i slp first dam tired.. lata u snuggle into the blankie and hug me slp k? haha good afternoonz ^^ woke up at 6... tried to study for chem... like nth can go in my head xia... im like stoning the whole day... i miss lots of ppl... my heart still feels hurt.... the wound haven close yet... my heart feels confused.... and i nid love =( im trying to be happy... for the people i love... but deep down in my heart... its still crying.... i wonder how long i can last... i dun think its very long... its sooner or lata...
23 Feb 2009
in the midst of a break... next paper econs at 2pm... GP was a breeze.... much simpler than i thot for paper 2... i think i screwed up paper 1... i think i wrote out of point... lol... anyways... im got a feeling econs is oso down lol.... nth to do lor... so im just blog visiting... and shun bian edit mssmb blog... haha carrot didi!!! hugs... lol.... i sense some jealousness =p hor SIM? haha... and felicia ask y mssmb add SIM nev add her... lol... (although i duno who they are) dun say i bad lar.... but i really duno who u guys are... nev really seen u guys lol... cos i nev go previous exchanges... i should be coming to the coming exchange bah.... cos some people wan me to go den can whack me hor? hor SIM? muhahaha.... u whack me lor... i emo u liao hmmph.... haha jkjk... u whack me ar? *waaahh.... carrot didi that baddie hit me.. sobs....* lolness.... ok im preety bored... and very high now... although i think i may emo after econs paper... haha.... aiya so whoever wana add me... on msn or blog or facebook or friendster... or maple or neopets... or wadever crap.... just ask me k? dunit paiseh or scared de....i very friendly and open de ^^ *yawns* sianz xia... no one to tok to... and i think i xiao liao... im toking to myself again lol.... lalalala... go exam hall lurrhs.... sayonara!!! *poke *pencil lead go into skin *ouchs!!! *piak *died of extreme blood lost ok extreme lameness.... all ty to carrot didi for making me high haha!!! nev been so high for so long le... lurvs eeu carr0t didi!!! xmuaaaakx ok seriously gtg le lata late haha...
ok back at home.... econs was soooo much better than expected... i thot i was a goner... den i saw... recession? lol last year topic? heng ar i nev forget xia... whew.... duno who come say is globalisation hor? heng nev waste my time memorise lol... oh and i just rmb.... i went to cut hair... so did my piglet lol... and ya im trying to edit my profile.. i just realised ive been 16 years old for 2 years liao lol...
alrite edited my profile... and yeah i just changed my song.. its passion from kingdom heartz 2 by utada hikaru ^^ but its the piano version... haha... i prefer the piano de...
22 Feb 2009
haiz... im feeling so confused today... whatever i study the previous days... all cant seem to get in my mind... so i stopped studying... ive been thinking... my life been a real screwed up... i screwed up so many relationships with other people... im about to screw my exams... what more can happen? haiz.... im afraid... very scared... i will lose the rest of my family... haiz.... pls dun leave me =(
21 Feb 2009
wah dam tired today... woke up at 1030.... den eat breakfast.... wanted to slp as usual... den since monday have econs... i cant slp.... must study lor... den after that went for lunch b4 novena... went to search for food.... from a western cafe at kovan... all the way to hawker centre at toapayoh lol... den after that went novena... halfway raining heavy xia... den when running from church to car... got myself wet... lol... den on way home got some sales... mum bought vacum cleaner... den go home slp..... den go church... den had some sucky dinner... worse korean food i ever ate in my life... den went to buy a new cage.... and accesories.. for my new hamster.... den now im home... dotaling and chatting...
20 Feb 2009
went to harrolds house today ^^ haha his room alot of cute things xia... alot of bears and pokemon stuff =p and i took one of his book home... with permisson of coz =) den he played dota.... he more pro den me lor rawr den i had to leave for band sobs ='( now im home... haha
19 Feb 2009
today went back to montfort... kena slap by carrot didi... *piak* den he slap me liao keep running away... lol... so i spent most of my time with piglet... managed to hug him a few times today lol.... missed him... haha...
18 Feb 2009
haha today chatted with carrot didi again... my feelings seems much better these days ^^ kena slapped by carrot didi so many times... *piak ouchs... *sobs *hide at one corner emo... haha... he dam cute lar... and pig didi just asked me hug him to slp ^^ yeah lets go lala land tgt haha pig hugs!!!
17 Feb 2009
haha im feeling better now... cute didi and elaine mei called last nite... had lots of laughter haha missed them xia... and yeah chatted with piggy on sms too... and carrot didi on msn ^^ luv u guys!!! hugs!!!
omg its been so long since i ever get high!!! thkx carrot didi!!! haha at first both of us spamming nonsense on msn lor... 2 crazy drunkards lol... i promised carrot didi and piglet den i wun emo liao... and carrot said if i ever emo or think of you-know-who his gona come my hse and smack me... (*piak* ouchs) haha den we toked alot of crap.... den lata went to syab facebook and spam... his comment hit 80 odd form spammings of me carrot and SIM... lol... den the 3 of us went msn instead... haha nice one syab gona have 80 odd new msg in his inbox... den me and carrot didi switch roles... dam funny lar... i became jonathan tan from MSS sec 3..SL of perc and pro drummer... he became rainald lim from nyjc J2.. ex flute SL and saxist (saxaphonist lol) it was dam hilarious... i din know it could be so much fun lol... and getting SIM all mixed up.... haha wad a laugh... ty carrot didi for cheering me up ^^ love euu muakx
16 Feb 2009
haiz the whole morning... i got 2 feelings... im dam lonely... and dam scared... lonely cos im alone... scared cos im afraid that i will be like that for the rest of my life... im scared that my other loved ones will go away from me as well... im so scared... piggy didi... pls let me hug u =(
15 Feb 2009
was watching bolt on dvd this morning.... haiz... it was the show baobei didi said he wanted to watch with me last time.... haiz... oso duno y i go watch... just makes me think of him more.... well watching thru the show... it somehow made me cry... its like.... when somone needs u.... they will love u like hell... and when u r uneeded.... they throw u aside... and find a replacement... haiz... it just makes me think about me and baobei... i shdnt even call him baobei lor... after all that he did to make me hurt... haiz... and parts of the movie was showing 3 happy frends spending thier time happily... just makes me miss him even more... he promised to take care of me... and be with me forever de... haiz...
went to church for SALT meeting... we did a couple of things... mainly watched the Passion of Christ and reflected on it....
Dear Lord Jesus,
I saw the immense pain and suffering you went through. What i am feeling now is nothing compared to yours. When you were betrayed by your friends, you forgave their actions. You also told us to forgive and forget those who hurt us. And you also asked us to love him as how you have loved us all. Lord please help me to forgive those who have hurt me. Help me to start afresh with those i have hurt, and those who have hurt me as well. Lord when you stood before your people, being humilitated, mocked and ridiculed at, please help me to remember that you are with me through all the pain and sufferings i am going thorugh now. Lord you have been hurt again and again by those you loved. The pain you went thorugh was unbearable. You felt like giving up, yet you chose to continue carrying your cross. The physical pain, mental and emotional pain, is what i am feeling now. Please help me to bear the weight of my cross and help me carry it. Lord throughout your whole passion, you had a number of friends you have met. Some came for your help and go away after that. Some stayed by your side as your brothers, while some denied you at the last minute. However you still treated all of them equally with your unconditonal love. Lord, please teach me to lvoe all the people i meet in my life. Lord while your were carrying your cross to calvary, you were tired and exhausted both physically and mentally and about to give up. But you did not. Lord grant me your undyiong spirit to fulfill my mission i am sent here for. Lord at the point when you could bear your sufferings no more, you turned to the father and asked him why he has forsaken you. But deep down in your heart you always knew he was beside you. Lord often than not, we have doubted the father's presence during failure. And never fail to forget him during the joyous moments in our lives. Lord please remind me that no matter where i am and what happens to me, the father will be with me though it all. Lord at the point of your death, you condemned your spirit to the father. With that, please teach me to leave all my unduly worries to the father and carry on with what i am supposed to do. Thank you Lord Jesus for the unconditional love you have gave to us men. Please continue to pray for everyone, espcially those in need of thy mercy. Amen
Dear Mother Mary,
The sorrow that you must have felt while watching your very own flesh and blood being stripped away by your own people is indeed painful. But you knew that he did it for the sake of mankind. Mother mary, as a mother, you felt hopeless seeing your only son being tortured and killed. It must have been hurtful. At the same time now, there are many people suffering all over the world. Be it orphans, beggars or the sick. They too are experiencing some degree of pain. Please do help them to ease their pain as you would do to your son. Amen.
14 Feb 2009
Happy v.day to all!!! especially my loved ones!!! luv eeu guys xmuakx!!! this post is for those who care and love me!! pls do know that i love and care for u.... just dun take advantage of it...dun take it for granted... and dun ever play with my heart k? its healing properly now... dun ever stab it hor!!! haha piggy carrot and cute didi... elaine jamie valerie lingling mei.... jolin jie.... daron kor.... just know that i treasure u guys alot... and hope u treasure our relationship too ^^
Although ive said i hate u and dun wish to see u again... but deep down in my heart i miss eeu =(
13 Feb 2009
Haha today was more like a half day xia... firstly there was some seminars held.... so usual lessons are canceled.... normal lessons will start after 230... which in this case i have no lessons cos my fridays always end early ^^ den during the first break.... my frends all wana pon... so we all went off lor... they actually wana come over my hse de... in the end all hum go back school... only me and another frend pon only... den yeah ive been home till 4pm... den i went back for band.... had an early dinner at serangoon central.... the vendor abit dumb xia... i ask for ji xiong rou (chicken breast meat) he gave me shao rou(roasted pork) lol.... den band today is orientation... only games.... but i only play captains ball... cos i wasnt informed to bring extra clothes for wet games.... den yeah after that i came back home... and thats the end of my day ^^
note to self: stop being naive.... wadever u wish for wun come true.... afteralll he broke your 3 main rules... he lied to u... he backstabbed u... he broke promises... and above all he broke your heart.... although your heart wants and needs him badly... but in fact u dun need somone like him.... u dun have to get worried or upset over somone like him... what more think of killing yourself *slaps* wake up boy!! u still got your piglet carrot and your cute didi!! and you still got your somone rite? so just forget everything... pretend that its all a nightmare... and its passed... get on with your life... Look on the bright side of life =) ty to all my loved ones for bringing me through this period love u all!!
12 Feb 2009
Today nth much lar.... just skimmed tru classes... something stupid happened.... i was ordering a bowl of laksa... the auntie came to me with a lighter lol...
went back band to see piglet and carrot didi... gave them their early v.day presents.... its dam funny lor.... carrot didi thot i said early bdae present... his bdae so long away lar lol.... den when i said its v for valentines not b for birthday... den he got a shocked... lol... and he started pinching my face and poking me.... haha.... i got him a carrot for v.day... not a real one... a softtoy from action city lol.... den i went home with piglet.... and yeah i got him a piggy.... i actually wanted to buy a tigger... for u-know-who.... but neh i guess i will skip that.... i think its time i forget everything about him... haiz....
It's not over.... It's not over.... It can't be over...
I'm falling apart, I'm falling apart Don't say this won't last forever You're breaking my heart, you're breaking my heart Don't tell me that we will never be together We could be, over and over We could be, forever
haiz.... like wad i said on 7th jan 2009.... i knew this would happen.... i was reading my posts... and happened to hit 29 July 2008... haiz.... i recalled what i learnt during chinese lesson.... and yeah i just realised i broke my promises.... that i made with myself on 3rd Aug 2008... haiz... i just wana hope and hope that it wun happen to me and piggy didi =(
went to facebook... i saw carrot didi posted my v.day gift to him.... he called it Carrot Head.... lolz... wad a cute and weird name hahaz... http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?id=655922205&pid=1337519&cp=655922205&cps=92299242b7#/photo.php?pid=1337519&id=655922205
10 Feb 2009
ok after last nite toking to piglet... im feeling dam high.... duno y... so instead of emoing... im dotaling in the com lab ^^
9 Feb 2009
haiz... im not feeling very well... heart hurts... and confused... i wonder if i shd forget him and all.... or should i die waiting for him... i smsed him last nite.... he hurt me again.... i really duno whati should do.... was crying again last nite.... so i called elaine mei on the phone... toking to her and sobbing a lil.... den all of a sudden cute didi called.... so we sort of conferenced.... it made up abit.... wasnt that sad liao.... and now i miss the times when giddy acted stupid and idiotic.... it was a hysterical laughter... he nev seem to make us laugh.... but well again... how long can this last? i think im too naive.... afterall these... i think i cant trust people anymore... not even those people who are close to me.... yes... i dun wana get hurt again... the hurt's been too deep.... everytime my heart seems to heal.... somone will cut it deeper... =/
8 Feb 2009
its been 3 weeks since we stopped toking to each other... ive been feeling dam bad... im not sure if im suppose to start toking to him... or shd he be the one who start toking to me... im just scared that he doesnt want me as his kor anymore.... i miss him and his crazy actions.... i miss his presence and his love... its been hard getting along these 3 weeks.... i wonder how his been... i wonder if he feels the same... all i just want is to get back by his side =(
nth much happen today... got new phone number... those who dun have please leave ur name at my tagbox i tell u asap... those in my contacts i arldy send sms le... and yeah i went emo the whole time... haiz... duno wad to do...
7 Feb 2009
today went to play pool with justin... cos i said i was bored and wanted somone to pei me... den lata he came my hse play left4dead... haiz... i just missed the times when there was somone to pei me all the time... wonder if he will rmb me during v.day....
6 Feb 2009
today school feels like halfday xia... late for school.... cos i thot it was 845.... its actually 815 assemble lol... went tennis... den maths 1 hr... den dota and basketball.... den GP... den i went home... din go for band..... and yeah im not feeling well... both physically and mentally... got flu... and i miss baobei alot... especially after watching the 7pm show.... miss him even more.... haiz....
played dota today... trying out other heroes.... den i suddenly turn on msn... saw baobei on9... haiz... wanted to tok to him... =( miss him alot.... i just cant stop thinking of him....
5 Feb 2009
HAppy birthday to piggy didi!!! haha didi hope you will be happy forever hope you will do well in your studies and hope we can be bros 4ever =) luv u xmuakxmuakxmuakx today after school i went back montfort... on the way i bought a dark choc cake... cos piggy didi likes choc ^^ den i went back to montfort.... spent my time with piggy and carrot didi... after band i brought piggy dii to the playground bhind school... den he asked me wad i wan... i asked him to close his eyes... den he hai shiu xia.... lighted the candle... but the wind too strong... and the cake slightly melted cos too long... lol... so i just passed it to him without the candles... at first he saw my hand got candle... den he was like.... eh duwan candle lar... so paiseh... lol... he dam cute lar!!! den he say i keep buying things for him.... aiya didi its ok de.... korkor buy for didi is ok de =) as long as u happy can le =p yeah and i made something for him too... den nth much bah.... me and baobei not on toking terms.... or at least he doesnt wana tok to me ='( i ate one whole tub of icecream xia... oh my goodness.... hahaZ feed u piggy arrrhmmm....
2 Feb 2009
school went off quite fine... although im still thinking of him... i feel so wierd now... its like ive nth in life to look forward to.... my world used to be baobei... and him alone... =/
1 Feb 2009
Sobs... dreamt of baobei.... miss him alot.... haiz....
well went to church at 12pm joined the youth ministry called S.A.L.T Saint Annes Life Teen well its not bad sound like loads of fun plus i can find my old catechism classmates =) and make new frends too haha yeah and i dragged my cousin along.... she looks soo... antisocial lol cos i think she doesnt know anyone there she looks so blur hahaz ok lar but today not many people.... cos all still having CNY thingies.... just hope the coming sessions are better ^^
im missing the feeling of being loved.... yes i miss baobei alot... i miss his company... i miss his voice... i miss his actions.... i miss his craziness.... i miss everything thats got to do with him...
I posted a new song for my blog.... cried when i first heard it....
Because Im a Girl
Because Im a Girl I just can't understand the ways Of all the men and their mistakes You give them all your heart And then they rip it all away
You told me how much you loved me And how our love was meant to be And I believed in you I thought that you would set me free
(REFRAIN): You should've just told me the truth That I wasn't the girl for you Still, I didn't have a clue So my heart depended on you, whoa
(CHORUS): Although I'll say I hate you now Though I'll shout and curse you out I'll always have love for you Because I am a girl
Been told a man will leave you cold Get sick of you and bored I know that it's no lie I gave my all, still I just cry
Never again will I be fooled To give my all when nothing's true I won't be played again But I will fall in love again
(REFRAIN) You should've just told me the truth That I wasn't the girl for you Still, I didn't have a clue So my heart depended on you, whoa
(CHORUS) Although I'll say I hate you now Though I'll shout and curse you out I'll always have love for you Because I am a girl
I loved you so Now you leave me in the cold How could this be I thought that you'd only love me
Into the night I will pray that you're alright You hurt me so I just can't let you go
You took advantage of my willingness To do anything for love Now I'm the only one in pain Will you please take it all away
Never thought being born a girl How I can love you and be burned And now I will build a wall To never get torn again
(CHORUS) Although I'll say I hate you now Though I'll shout and curse you out I'll always have love for you Because I am a girl
(CHORUS) Although I'll say I hate you now Though I'll shout and curse you out I'll always have love for you Because I am a girl
31 Jan 2009
things din went very well today... went back to band to see carrot didi.... but i went emo when i saw baobei.... =/ den lata me and piggy and cute didi went to the conductor house to play... with syabil and his gang.... sadly baobei and carrot didi din come oso.... haiz den i saw a playground... and reminded me of me and baobei... i hugged piggy just now.... and i almost cried... i missed the feeling of love =/ went to church... cried inside... the songs reminds me of baobei... that we sang at the top of the overhead bridge... sobs ='(
30 Jan 2009
things went off quite fine... although i still wish baobei is back with me... i keep thinking of the things we did together... His the first person whom ever watch the stars together with me... up at the sky garden at vivo city.... the first movie we watched tgt... winx club and making a nuisance during the movie.... the songs we sang together... its not over, your call and other songs... especially up at the overhead bridge in the middle of the night... and lying down in the middle of the road... the sunset at marina bay.... the many hugs he gave me.... the crazy pics we took... my first ever xmas present... my first slap.... even on my bed... there were many enjoyable times... like us poking and hugging each other... all the crazy things we did that made us laugh at each other... haiz... i just wish the list can go on and never end... i miss you baobei...
well today sch ended at 1230... went to watch love matters at j8.... haiz j8... the place reminds me of darling.... and cute didi.... =/ the show wasnt very funny as i thought it would be... but there was a sentence they said that almost made me cry... it says some things cannot be found once they are lost... i was thinking about baobei... and i alsmost started crying.... wekk but things went on smoothly lar... went back for band and stuff... now im rotting away...
29 Jan 2009
Happy birthday to you Happy birthday to you Happy birthday to baobei happy birthday to you =) hey baobei happy bdae... hope all ur dreams and wishes come true... i do hope u will rmb me as your kor... and that we can be tgt 4ever... but things have turned out bad for us... im sry about this... and i really loved to spend ur bdae with u... but i dun think i can liao... since im a bother to u... i rather not interfere with ur life anymore... i rather sit at a corner and watch u grow happily... than to make ur life a miserable one.... thks for all the happy memories u have created for me... i will treasure them.... i will always rmb the wishes u granted true for me... that first time i ever watch the stars together with u at the sky garden at vivo city.... the first movie we watched tgt... winx club and making a nuisance tgt.... the songs we sang together... especially up at the overhead bridge in the middle of the night... and lying down in the middle of the road... the sunset at marina bay.... the many hugs u gave me.... the crazy pics we took... on my bed where we poked laughed and hugged each other... but i really dun wan memories of u... i just one u.... there are so many wishes and dreams i had that are not fulfilled... i hope that one day u will understand and come back to me... and we can fulfill them one by one.... baobei u will forever be in my heart... and if u do nid me... i will always be there for u =/ Luvs eeu always...
haiz i couldnt take it lar... went to toilet and cried during lessons... now my classmates think i having pms =/ haiz daphne jie asks me to 4get him... elaine mei ask me to tok to him... i cant 4get him lar... after all the things we did.... its impossible to 4get him de.... tok to him... i doubt he wana tok to me now.... and im still confused if i shd find him lata... i really scared we end up quarreling and crying... ='(
ok heres the review of wad happened today... i really din listen much in today lessons.... after school i headed str8 for montfort... baobei still didnt wana tok to me... fine lor... i just gave him the bdae present i made for him... den i just left with carrot didi... had a long chat with him... yeah ty carrot didi... u really made me feel better... wanted to give him a hug b4 he went home... but he say got ppl around dun dare lol... den laopei fetch me home for dinner... den we went to pasir ris park... had a long chat and drink... took a bottle of tiger.... well i was reflecting on my life... i was thinking of the happy things me and baobei did... really missed them... maybe there was a misunderstanding... fine maybe i shall wait.... but i cant say we will be the same again... after all my heart has been hurt liao... if he doesnt want me... den i wun force him either... afterall i still got carrot didi bah... hope his the one who can help me thru this time... cos his the last didi i ever have who can tok to me =)
28 Jan 2009
im having a break at com lab... haiz... couldnt conc at any lessons today... been smsing elaine mei.... toking about me and baobei didi.... she suggests me toking to him.... so i tried to sms him... and he scolded me... =/ haiz... tmr is his bdae... wonder if i shd give him a call at 12am.... and i wonder if i shd find him tmr...
y would no one understand me... i always thot baobei will unds my feelings... that im alone and i nid him.... haiz... i always felt that he was the sunshine that brings me hope to live each day.... =/ now that the sunshine is gone... i dun even feel like waking up at all...
27 Jan 2009
haiz couldnt slp last nite... been thinking of baobei... missed him alot... and i smsed some things to him.... Just wana let u know that i lost 4 people whom i love alot... i wana treasure u and love u.... i duwan lost u too... but our relationship seems to b getting worse each day... i just hope we wun end up like me and my darling didi... Haiz and i thot u would be the one making the remaining days of my life worth living... guess i was wrong =/ im losing my will to live.... if i cant live happy... and be with those i love... wads the point of living.... and i always believed in everlasting love... how naive was I..... we thought about living together when we grow up... we thought we could depend on each other.... we thought we could be together forever... it was all but a fool's hope =/
went to watch ink heart this morning.... haiz... whole day no mood... kept thinking of baobei... and i got a feeling he doesnt want me anymore... he keep ignoring me liao.... haiz... i really cant take it anymore.... im crying dam badly liao....
haiz the crying is over.... its the worse crying i ever had in my life... nev cried so hard b4.... i think my tigger is wet liao.... but i still cant get over him =/
26 Jan 2009
ok firstly happy niu year to all MOO!!! lolz... ok lar nth happen much today... felt better than ytd... baobei sry for all those smses that hurt u... im really sry.... i din know wad happened to me last nite.... i know u still luv me de... im so sry for saying those to u... i hope u can forgive me =( i really do love u and i dun wana leave u ='(
morning went church at 8am... den came home change.... go ahma hse... play abit of blackjack... den came home again to eat lunch... after lunch went my mum side ahma hse... den stay awhile den come back for dinner... nth happen much lar... and im just waiting for baobei to reply to me nia...
25 Jan 2009
ok for the past few days nth much happen.... not with baobei lar... he busy collecting ang bao ^^ so today is cny eve.... time for more food and ang bao ^^ haha!!! baobei u say wadever is mine is yours... wadever is yours is mine hor? hahaZ so sweet.... so we share ang bao k? lol no lar jkjk.... i dun think this year i getting alot of angbao.... my angbao money dropping year by year... last time visit great grand ahgong side... alot of relatives so got alot angbao... now he not arnd le... so nev see any extended relatives so lesser money liao... nvm lar money not impt de... as long as baobei happy can liao ^^
ok ive been slping for the whole day.... i woke up at 930... ate bread.... sleep.... wake up at 1230 eat lunch sleep.... wake up at 6pm dinner.... go ahma hse.... until now lor.... drank alot oso.... not a very good mood today ='(
im going emo again.... haiz... i was toking to baobei on msn... i just told him to just forget about me =( no one cares about me anyways... im alone... uncared and unwanted... just let me rot and die alone... afterall im ive been alone throughout the past 17 years... im always alone.... and whenever i nid somone beside me... no one does.... u got friends and people around u.... u never had to tok to bears when u go emo... u never had to be alone whenever u nid somone beside u... u wun understand de.... =/
i smsed baobei.... i told him that lets forget everything... and yeah lets not see each other anymore bah.... =/
23 Jan 2009
hahaZ ok today alot of things happened... sch sux lar... got lessons in morn b4 celeb.... and i tried to take early leave duwan go for celeb... den kena caught by form tcher... sianz... den after celeb i din go back montfort... think too late le... den just nice baobei at hougang mall mac... so i went to find him.... den we went home tgt... den bather and change... den we went to bras basar.... baobei bought himself a xiao... ok shyt i should have gotten one too.... nvm... next time bah ^^ den we went swee lee... the service sux.... they dun even know they are singapore's only muramatsu supplier... and they dun even know they sell muramatsu flutez... wad kinda sales guy xia.... nvm so me and baobei went down and we saw jacks place.... den i decided to give baobei an early birthday treat ^^ i ordered baked rice.... and baobei bought chic cutlet.... haha ok den we went china town.... walked there... and got lost... took 2 hr to reach haha... in the end took a bus lol... and den we walk walk shopshop and watched some performance.... den went back to baobei hse below the playground... haha baobei cannot play the xiao.... or at least his embrouchure not very stable yet ^^ so i was playing most of the time lol... ok now im home... and i found out baobei oso got sore throat... and flu... same as me... lol...
22 Jan 2009
hahaZ ok today went back montfort band see my didis haha... ok spoke to darling didi but i think his ignoring me... haiz... den the usual thing lor.... me baobei and pig didi go usual playground.... did lots of crap.... almost made syabil pee in his pants.... hahaz.... dam funny.... ya and i missed my 7pm show... dam.... now waiting 9pm show start ^^
21 Jan 2009
oh well today nth much happened... just that i fell while doing pe.... and den my spinal injury got worse.... haiz.... im not that emo now... but i really miss darling didi... haiz...
20 Jan 2009
wah today super tiring... dorzed off in many lessons... ren all the way till 5pm... from morn till 5pm only got 30min break... walao... oh well... din get a chance to tok to baobei yet... maybe i call him at 10pm bah... after the 9pm show ^^
haiz... he duwna tok to me liao... he wants to tok to a girl... sobs.... i go tok to tigger le hmmph...
tigger says... its not over.... its not over.... it cant be over.... but the "IT" never started at all =/
and im crying again.... i just spoke to my bf in msn.... haiz... miss my best frend alot.... din tok to him for so many mths le.... haiz...
19 Jan 2009
Today is a very tiring day xia... lessons end at 5pm.... and we got 4 lessons... all lasting 2 hrs... very tiring lar.... den baobei say wana buy shoe... so after sch i pei him go vivo... after going so many topman shops... couldnt buy the patrick shirt... den i gave up looking for it liao... ok we walk walk quite some number of shops before getting didi's shoe.... den we went to the same usual playground lolz... and den we go LJS dabao food... went to the rooftop to eat ^^ its dam romantic lor... the nightsky... the sea breeze... the water..... the food!!!! and lastly my baobei didi =) hahaZ it was yet another pleasent day.... ok now im home trying to do homework....
18 Jan 2009
Plans for the day.... wake up at 10am... nua on bed till 12... go eat lunch.... buy clothes with mum... go out with baobei... walkwalk + concert.... come home by 1030.... sleep....
haiz... today wasnt a very good day for me... lots of things din worked out... sry didi for raising my tone when u called just now... im so sry for doing that... cos i was sort of quarelling with people at home... im so sry.... ya and didi was late... he made me wait.... and i had to ren for not scolding him.... and its not his fault.... im so sry baobei.....
ok first we went marina.... wanted to buy the patrick tshirt from topman... but too bad all sold out... so we went to wisma outlet to see got stock.. too bad oso bo.... haiz sianz half... so we each got a cup of frappuchino.... hahas and we smuggled into the mrt.... my mood sort of lighten up ^^ ty didi once again =) ok den we went to esplanade.... the concert was preety nice haha gratz tim and all the mypso members for the wonderful performance ^^ during intermission wanted to look for tim... but he bo ans phone... so after concert he called me.... paiseh i din bring anything larhs.... sry lar.... and i met up with daphne jie.... and den baobei nid to rush home.... so yeah we sort of went home with empty stomachs... and my gastric sort of came again... so i went rivervale mall looking for food... food court closed.... long johns closed.... din feel like eating mac... so i went home eating maggie mee again... with potato chips.... dam hungry lar.... okok i go slp le nitez
17 Jan 2009
im rotting badly now... haiz... u know... after so many months... i still haven really toked to darling didi... haiz... miss him alot... wonder if he still love me mar.... =/
haiz and i just wana stress again the things i hate about parents... they nev keep promises.... and they expect us to keep ours.... they expect us not to argue with them... yet they always argue with us... they expect us to follow their footsteps for our future although they know we will be unhappy.... they keep saying that they respect our decisions and wana give us freedom... yet they still say no to everything we wana do... this is stupid and crap....
16 Jan 2009
ok today sch abit xiao lar... friday only 2 lesson... 1230 finish lessons... lol... den today got chem test... think wun fail lar... but wun score oso =/ cos i last min study.... haha... and ya i went to hougang interchange met up with tim at 1pm... he pass me tmr concert tic.... den i went to pass pig didi his scores i printed for him... den now im home... waiting for 530 band to start..
15 Jan 2009
hiies everything fine now... haha somone plastered for me last nite.... luv u baobei didi muakx ty for peing me.... haha.... i feel better liao.... and ty for this somone for toking and takeing care of me appreciated alot ^^ and someone read my blog and told my parents... so they are thinking im gona jump or something... lol... thkx for worrying for me... but u dun have to call my parents de.... i wun die so easily... im sane enough.... i wun die so easily de.... haha... ok todays lessons went smoothly... although i din do any homework.... but lucky all bo collect haha.... den i went to montfort hoping to go out with baobei after band... but too bad his dad came.... sianz... ok now im gona study chem... tmr got test haha...
14 Jan 2009
haiz.... im still feeling emo.... wads more... im feeling even more stressed about my studies now... im now in school.... cant take the lessons anymore... so i came to library.... haiz... i duno wads gona happen.... haiz... baobei didi... its all up to u to make me happy now... cos at this moment.... nth else can make me happy... all i just want is to be with u =/ i cant stop thinking of u during lessons.... its so hard to concentate cos i keep looking at my phone... trying to see if u called or sms me.... and everytime i see ur face on my phone... i get this crazy idea of running away.... haiz... pls help me =/
i need a plaster.... to heal my heart.... its cut preety badly... and its hurting like mad.... the wound cant seem to close... haiz...
13 Jan 2009
open hse sux.... i have no mood for it now.... din slp for 2 days liao... din eat for 1 day liao.... vomitted once just now.... haiz... my heart is very confused... just how much do i mean to u? and how much do u mean to me? are u just my didi? or something more than that? my heart hurts each time i think about u.... i promised somone im not gona cut anymore.... but i cant take it anymore.... my stomach hurts... but i cant eat.... haiz... i just hope our relationship can still last... thats all that matters.....
"My Immortal"
I'm so tired of being here Suppressed by all my childish fears And if you have to leave I wish that you would just leave 'Cause your presence still lingers here And it won't leave me alone
These wounds won't seem to heal This pain is just too real There's just too much that time cannot erase
[Chorus:] When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears And I held your hand through all of these years But you still have All of me
You used to captivate me By your resonating light Now I'm bound by the life you left behind Your face it haunts My once pleasant dreams Your voice it chased away All the sanity in me
These wounds won't seem to heal This pain is just too real There's just too much that time cannot erase
[Chorus]
I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone But though you're still with me I've been alone all along
[Chorus]
12 Jan 2009
oh well first day of sch... went there 1 hr early.... so i emoed at the same usual staircase.... ok today kinda rocks.... 830 got talk from the principal and stuff.... 1030 release.... had breakfast till 1130..... 1130 supposed to have briefing... got 3 groups of people.... 1. ushers for open house tmr 2. CCA leaders 3. The rest not in any of those two groups.... students in group 3 are supposed to go to some sec sch.... to promote tmr open hse.... and the thing is im not posted to any of this 3 groups... i duno y but my names are not in any of them... hahas so well i went back find baobei... he end sch at 130.... so from 1130 to 130 i emo at mac.... den 130 leh.... i exchange clothes with baobei.... den i went into band room to find darling didi... lol... cos the stupid security guard duwan let me in... cos got o lev results thingy.... anyways... i spent another hr with baobei at the playground... den lata he came over my hse.... with syabil.... and syabil emo today lol... sort of stayed till 530 den they left... now im stuck to hw... lol tmr open hse... no lesson again ^^
ok im going so emo now.... my heart very pain lar.... and i started sprouting nonsense liao.... haiz... its like.... theres someone around u love so much.... and yet u cant love that person.... the pain that u feel.... that u have to keep watching the person's shadow... and that u cant be with the person... haiz... i duno wad to do....
ok im crying again... my eyes are wet.... my heart very pain now.... so is my head.... and my hand.... i duwan cut... so i just grabbed my hand as hard as i can....
11 Jan 2009
well last day before school reopen.... so i chose to spend time with baobei today ^^ morning baobei still slping.... so i went to watch ponyo with my family... was quite funny lar.... den after that i went with baobei to TTSH.... to see his ahma.... den we went to watch red cliff 2.... its dam nice xia.... just that the fighting not very action nia... haiz... tmr start sch le.... sry baobei i got lesser time to spend with u le.... so ya maybe every weekend bah =/
10 Jan 2009
last nite never slp well... only 1 or 2 hrs i think.... den went for CIP..... 7am clementi mrt..... 6am wake up.... so at 7+ i went mac buy breakfast.... aiya nth much lar.... just did the admin stuff.... quite an easy job.... den took mrt back home.... den go church.... aiya today nth much to tok about....
9 Jan 2009
eee last nite dreamt of baobei xia... walao.... the contents... i dun wana say =p sry its a secret....
today went to nanyang in the morning.... got band prac.... morn was combined den lunch then sectionals... so after combine i run le.... went back montfort again... cos they got open hse mar.... den baobei drag me there again... aiya nth much lar.... just followed arnd him lor.... den saw kor..... and mu old teachers.... nth much.... den after the open hse... went to a playground behind montfort..... syabil and shakae(paiseh duno how spell his name) were also there.... den we did quite alot of stupid stuff.... yaya and we went home lor... den come home on msn.... kor ask me y i diao him today.... den say wad i paikia wth lar..... nvm... i got nth to say... haiz...
8 Jan 2009
today went back montfort band... cos baobei dragged me there.... saw carrot didi.... he looks different in long pants... haha... looks dam cute... and i almost cried when i saw darling and cute didi.... i duno y lar i just toked to darling didi... den i saw cute didi... i wanted to ignore him de lar..... den he came to me... ask me why i went out with elaine and nev call him.... den i duno how to reply... i just told him why bother... u oso nev bother call us leh... haiz... im sry cute didi i really din mean it... its just i cant take it anymore lar... almost cried just now lor... haiz... so i waited after band.... den i went home with pig and baobei didi... pig went home str8... den me and baobei go compass shopping.... haiz... today wasnt such a happy day after all..
7 Jan 2009
oh well today was last minute de... 3pm went for my face thingy.... ok baobei stop laughing.. its not funny.... ended at 5pm.... den baobei didi say wan bring me go cut hair.... den he say he on the way.... ya rite on the way.... 6pm still haven reach yet... zai xia.... ok nvm.... went to cut... innocent hairstyle lol... no more the long fringe guy... den baobei bo eat lunch say wana go eat mac.... and its alrdy 630... nice lunch leh... hahaZ den i told him we slowly walk back to sengkang... we were opposite montfort by the way... den ya well... mum said she cooking den say waiting for me to eat... den well reached home at 9pm... and obviously she didnt wait liao lolZ.... she called at 8pm.... i said i at rivervale plaza there.... and i took 1 hr to walk home lol.... all thkx to baobei lar.... drag me to all sorts of places.... go playground sommore.... den he still go sing those emo songs.... make me almost cry in front of him.... walao eh.... anyways i really luv him alot lar... he like so caring lor.... last nite was cold... he still remind me keep a jacket beside... although he knows my bed always got 2 de.... den just now say dun share straw cos he having flu... and he feels bad cos his flu spread to me liao... hahaZ... nvm de lar... baobei still the best <3
argh... baobei made me cry liao... walao... he was singing this bloody emo song.... yeah the one on my blog now.... now i cant stop thinking that i will lose you lor... haiz... now darling didi is coming into my head.... cute didi oso.... haiz.... nice one lar baobei.... play with my feeling xia... make me happy den now make me cry....
It's Not Over
My tears run down like razorblades And no, I'm not the one to blame It's you, or is it me? And all the words we never say Come out and now we're all ashamed And there's no sense in playing games When you've done all you can do
But now it's over, it's over, why is it over? We had the chance to make it Now it's over, it's over, it can't be over I wish that I could take it back But it's over
I lose myself in all these fights I lose my sense of wrong and right I cry, I cry It's shaking from the pain that's in my head I just wanna crawl into my bed And throw away the life I led But I won't let it die, but I won't let it die
But it's over, it's over, why is it over? We had the chance to make it Now it's over, it's over, it can't be over I wish that I could take it back
I'm falling apart, I'm falling apart Don't say this won't last forever You're breaking my heart, you're breaking my heart Don't tell me that we will never be together We could be, over and over We could be, forever
I'm falling apart, I'm falling apart Don't say this won't last forever You're breaking my heart, you're breaking my heart Don't tell me that we will never be together We could be, over and over We could be, forever
It's not over, it's not over, it's never over Unless you let it take you It's not over, it's not over, it's not over Unless you let it break you It's not over
4 Jan 2009
Haha today supposed play left 4 dead at lan shop... with my cousins... but well stupid lan shop bo that game... so we ate sakae for lunch den went my hse dota.... well wad happens after this really made my day very happy.... i went below baobei didi hse... so he invited me up cos bo ppl at home... haha his hse just messy thats all ^^ well his doing his homework and i sort of disturbed him lol.... touch his violin and clarinet... lol... and all his barang barang.... den i asked him out..... he said wana go somewhere near like kovan... but he dragged me all the way to vivo lolz... went toy r us where he went to play the capsule machine thingy.... we went in walk walk den hungry came out lor... went to long john silver eat.... second time i ate LJS at vivo... rmb that time came vivo with the clarinet section... with fu yuan and benjamin lolZ.... didi ate his chicken fillet... den i bhot grilled chic.... and dessert was choc cream pie.... it was dam sweet haha den me and baobei share =p.... den outside got this playground.... and our stupid idea was to play with the kids lolZ.... got this kid help us take pic lar... we went to the slide.... see saw and all the diff things... felt dam happy.... den wanted to go home when didi dragged me to the rooftop garden... and well we got ourselves a lil wet lol.... waded to the other side of vivo.... we set down lar.... that moment was like dam sweet... den that time i told didi i wan pei him see stars mar... so we lie down on the floor and see stars lor lol... we went daiso and we sort of abit siao lar... got those flower chains for the hawaiian girls de... den we both go wear and take pic again lol.... ya and we went back home.... took a very long time... went compasspoint and as usual duwan take lrt.... we bought 1 cone and 1 mocha.... den we yi bian walk yi bian share lor... haha.... den we sang lots of crap song lar... from church songs to second hand serenade and chinese songs... den went his hse below the playground lol... we started playing again haha... den while crossing the bridge to his hse... we saw one cockcroach and we both screamed..... lol ya and didi made me scream when he tricked me that i stepped on the cockcroach... he asked me to specially put this in ^^ hahaZ haiz... wished everyday was like tonight.... baobei didi im gona treasure every moment with u ^^ luv u muakx
3 Jan 2009
Haiz just finished dinner.... was watching fate stay night... and i just realised something.... im afraid of being alone.... without my loved ones..... i just cnt stop crying whenever i thinking of a world alone without my loved ones... i just love them so much.... although we havent really toked for long... i still really miss and long for them.... i cant bear thinking about them.... i just cant let go.... haiz... especially being with them for so long.... spending so much time with them... the feeling of all suddenly disappearing is so.... sad.....
3 Jan 2009
well this year haven take any pics at happyville yet... so at 12midnite i went to happyville with baobei didi... took like 30 pics bah.... haha... diff angle diff expression diff pose lolZ!!! the feeling was very happy and high... and love... lol... this is the 3rd year i took pics at happyville... rmb the first year i was all alone... second year was with tim and lala.... den this year with baobei... hahaZ LuvS eeuS baobei didi xmuakZx!!!
1 Jan 2009
A fresh new year.... brand new start... hope all goes well... yeah and i cant believe im crying.... when i just said goodye to my guild and buddies on maple... gona miss them alot...
31 Dec 2008
Last day of the year.... supposed to be with baobei today.... but well he sort of woke up at 330pm.... lol piggy... neh i think his sort of tired... we were talking till so late last nite.... hahaz... wanted to go countdown with baobei today.... but he going church de... so i guess i will just skip it bahz.... haiz... me heart feel so ____.... lots of mixed feelings... well lets see how i should start saying... firstly... i duno how long more i will live.... my dad's side has a clear trace of cancer... lots of people kena... throat, lung, stomach.... mum side oso got.... even my mum tio oso.... got a huge chance im gona get it too... cos well most of my traits come from my mum... and my lungs are dam weak due to pnuemonia twice.... went to hospital loads of time becos of that... so yeah... to those arnd me... pls be prepared.... all i just want for the rest of my life is just love.... frends... family... it doesnt have to be so a bgf type of love... im just satisfied with sibling love... some people ask y i got such a huge family.... well... sadly cos i really cant feel love from many of them... espcially this time when the whole family is breaking apart.... haiz... secondly its more about my studies.... well i have my own reasons for studying.... i wana study hard so that i can like provide some financial help to my didi when i start to work.... i wana make them happy cos i know some of them arent really financialy stable now.... but my goal seems to fade cos i really duno if we will still be tgt then.... thirdly is JC2 life next year.... its gona suck alot.... especially a life in JC w/o friends... its just like going there everyday w/o a purpose... and lastly about this family of mine... all i just want so badly is to sleep.... and wake up the next day... everything is fine and all that is happening now is just a nightmare... =/ im so confused now... darling didi have sinced stopped toking to me since june... im really not communicating well with carrot didi cos i duno y i cant get to him... ive never toked alot with arthur didi as well... pig didi is like in his own world now... ever since i came back from japan... cute didi...still playing his games and thinking about the girls he met at NCO... havent tok to him since band camp.... and dun wish to tok to him.... kor leh... think he doesnt want me liao... he got his own world of his own... out of contact with jie and my meis since very long.... only left contact with elaine mei and baobei didi bah... haiz... maybe i shd just let go of everything... maybe i shd just go back to my lonely self... and with my bears bah....
30 Dec 2008
Haiz... duno y keep thinking of darling didi again.... i wonder when will he really start to tok to me again...
26 Dec 2008
Yeah today darrkmagic got 120!!! finally became a bishop... whew... ok anyways abit busy now trying to get all my skills ^^
25 Dec 2008
hohoho merry xmas everyone ^^ and yeah today went out with family to watch bedtime story... den after that i went to watch twilight with baobei didi... well he was dam late... said we meet at 6pm.. he went out of house at 6pm... and reached marina at 645... ZZ and yeah i 4got to buy a present for baobei so while waiting i bhot him 1... and coincidentally he was late cos he oso last min shop xmas present for me... haha so sweet... first xmas present i recieved from any of my didis xia... anyways bedtime story was funny... and i thot twilight was more of a science fantasy.. it turned out to be more of a romance thingy.. the show is mostly about how a human and a vampire dated ZZZ and yeah dinner was great... had some jap pasta? lol... spent 50 bucks on dinner... and den cos baobei nid to be home early... so i yeah went back too ^^ at least this year was better than last year ^^ at least still got ppl pei me ^^ luvS eeu baobei didi xmuakx
21 Dec 2008
today leh went out whole day... went to church in morn.... den watched the day the earth stood still.... lunch was at crystal jade b4 the movie.... dim sum was nice... den after that went to watch another movie yes man.... super funny and hilarious.... den dinner at some western restraunt/bar.... super ex..... haha.... and well nth much
19 Dec 2008
my hols are all wasted... haiz... no one pei me... and im so bored at home... wanted to pei baobei but he at camp sobs... he just return nia....
15 Dec 2008
well today is ahgong bdae... wish he can live longer ^^ and erm.... ya last few days mapling with baobei lol... now 103 le ^^ jyjy baobei 2nd job !!!
13 Dec 2008
Well i duno where i should start... ok... erm firstly cute didi went to hongkong today... and well he din say goodbye b4 he left =/ haiz... life doesnt seem good for the past month... firstly this family seems to be breaking apart..... kor starts to keep to himself again.... i haven spoke to jie and my 3 meis for 2 or 3 mths le... elaine mei is busy with her stead... gideon seems to forget everything when he plays stupid soldier front... darling didi and carrot didi... i oso nev talk to them since band camp le... pig didi went MIA... tried to contact but unreacheable... only left baobei didi... well thats my extended family side... my immediate family leh.... my ahma fell down... left hand on cast.. nid go operation she duwan... so wound wun heal properly... ahgong got minor heart blockage... mummy got breast cancer undergoing operation and radiotherapy.... haiz... i really duno wad to do..... may god please hear my prayers and help unite this family once again =/ well sometimes i feel that i am actually very lucky... i got a full family... we have enough to eat 3 meals a day... even surplusses to splurge on trips and vacations... i have love from 2 parents and my grandparents... i have a few frends... and above all i have my didis kor jie and meis to pei me... and keep me happy... yet i still complain about the life of mine... how sucky it is.... after spending time with my other didis... i just found out how better my life is as compared to them.... and all i just wan is to give them the happiness they lack in their life...
12 Dec 2008
another great day with baobei today.... well baobei came my hse in the afternoon... well something really embarassing happened... and well im not supposed to tell u guys wad happen... so yeah the following is gona be typed out in code... its for me to know and u to find out =) "C:\Rain\~Cu73Ra1ny~\Blogstuff\My Blog\12 Dec 2008.txt" lolz!!! ok den he came into my hse.... and well i think he crazy about maple liao... he duwan leave my hse xia... ok den when he fianally leveled up... we went out.... brought him home to change clothes... den we went The cathay... wanted to watch igor but too bad only GV have... and since PS is always crowded on friday nites... we decided to watch another show... twilight!!! too bad the tics were sold out... den we did a stupid thing... we bought popcorn... sat outside the building and watch stars!! omg its dam cool lar.... i feel so high and happy.... den we went to eat the jap food at dhoby xchange... spent lots of time eating... well den i treat him to eat bah... since his short of cash... den we went back to compasspoint to walkwalk... its been a long time since i stepped into metro... decided to pei baobei seeseelooklook.... as expected lego freaks.... so we went str8 to lego section... and guess wad... legos are getting more expensive nowadays... legos used to be 50+ now all 100+ SGD.... cant afford... and i duno how to get him a xmas present xia... super bo lui.... well den we took a LRT back... and ya maple again lolz!!! doesnt sound interesting? haha too bad i censored of the interesting part...
11 Dec 2008
ok i had a call from baobei didi like at 1am in the morning lolz... had a feeling he was gona call me whn i slping... so i din of the phone.... and there it was... i receieved a call from him.... lolz... den we chat a while b4 we fell aslp.... we were supposed to watch igor but postponed to tmr lor... haha den baobei come to my hse today.... supposed to wake him up at 7am.... i tried to call him but he woke up at 11 lolz.... den he came in the afternoon before tuition... den in the end duwan go tuition postpone tmr lolz... ok we had a great time today... we were like poking and tickling each other like mad... and erm pillow fights lol... the feeling of hugging him tightly is so _____... well unexplainable.... haha i sort of pinned him on the bed.... lied on him so he cant move... den keep poking and tickling him lol... poke as in at the waist lar.... and den he sort of turned over and poked me lolz... yeah and we did lots of singing... him and his guitar and me singing lol... haha well the best birthday gift i had this year... is to have such a loving baobei didi =)
10 Dec 2008
omg im so happy today.... baobei didi pei me go watch movie... it was dam fun with baobei xia... i watched winx club lol... u must be thinking wads with 2 guys watching it... hehe just now oso got ppl asking... lolz!! aiya i like the show mar... and theres nth wrong leh... haha... and i was lying on baobei shoulder thru the whole show... den he keep tickling me.... haha... dam funny xia... den we keep making "extra effects" to the show ^^ after that we shop arnd plaza sing... din know he like bears too... den during mrt ride... we keep poking each other xia... den i was lying on his lap den he keep tickling me lolz... so stupid xia... den i almost fell off the chair... hahaz... anwyays tmr watching igor with baobei again ^^ how i wish darling and pig didi can come too =/
9 Dec 2008
haiz as each day goes by.... its closer and closer to end of hols.... and ive been thinking.... thru this hols... i actually haven done much... i din really take the time to spend with my loved ones... ive been mapling and mapling... maybe i shd cut that down.... i relaly wana spam time with them... especially some of my didis whom i miss so much... well from tmr onwards i shd prob go out often with them bah... thats if they are willing and got time to pei me lor =) cos baobei say he wan chiong movie marathon with me mar ^^ haiz darling didi and pig didi... i do hope u guys can come too... really miss u guys alot... especially darling didi.... we haven been communicating well since beginning of this yr =/
8 Dec 2008
ok today supposed to go gamerz to get my zkm helm for darrkmagic.... but got some prob... so laopa say another time helm for me.... den now i at cute didi hse.... so sianz xia.... elaine slping... gideon dota or sf.... den im stuck with maple... haiz... anyways... im going super emo... miss baobei alot... haiz.... when he come back we must catch up alot xia... ohya den mr tan say i nonid play for coming concert.... cos i so long nev go prac.... den band camp oso no nid go.... so can spend alot time with baobei le =) haiz.... miss u alot xias...
7 Dec 2008
today had standard chart marathon 10km.. it sux... din train for the whole year so my timing sux... and den at nite oso had band dinner... supposed to be fun.. but well i cant enjoy it lar... miss baobei didi.... haiz... super luv sick...
6 Dec 2008
ok its time to emo... im superduper love sick now... haiz.... baobei didi where u???? miss u alot xia....
5 Dec 2008
Once upon a time,
Hehe todays my bdae.... ok another crazy nite i had.... at 12midnite directly i recieved a call from dominic didi... lol he said he was the first to wish my happy bdae lol!! 3 hrs ago... kor msned me and wished me happy bdae said in melbourne alrdy 5th dec lol... 3days ago guo hong wished me on facebook.... lol wrong date boy!!! this morning wake up.... dominic didi called me and wished me again... and said 11:59:99 gona sms me from KL lol... he wanted to be the first and last person lolS!! haha so sweet <3 saw daphne jie's wish on facebook... and elaine mei msned me... she claimed she smsed me all the way from msia lol.... but well suay din recieve it... anyway im still touched k? no wrys ^^ " Korkor , Elaine here . Happy Birthday! heh , iloveyou . enjoy your special day . dun emo or anything okay ? " haha too late im beginning to emo liaozzz jkjk!!! Lastly my mum smsed me and wished me... she scared i slping dun dare call lol.... and well only 5 people wished me today... one wished me 3 days ago lol... wrong day boy!! haha... and looks like many people will forget my bdae lor... but yeah i think this year's will be bad... and guess wad im stuck in this stupid hse.... no one pei me xia... parents said we going out in afternoon.... den morning im stuck in this hse... ARGH!!!! dominic didi say he wanted to pei me de... but he going KL.... sobs... so he say after he back... Elaine mei say wan pei me after she come back form KL.... pig didi say wana pei me today de... but i think he oso forget le... or maybe his pigging at the moment ^^ kor say when he come back from melbourne den pei me... cute didi darling didi carrot didi and arthur didi totally forgot... lol dominic didi so sweet xia <3 din know he so loving de haha! OHya b4 i forget... my bdae wish.... I wish that people around the world will always be happy I wish for world peace I wish for eternal bliss and happiness well i just hope all those in my family (biological and extended)
will live lovingly and happily ever after <3
lol look at the startinbg and ending... so fairy tale like lolz!!!
ok so today i went to watch city of ember with my cousin and pr... haiz... stuck with them xia... worse than last year... at least last year still got cute didi pei me... this year all cannot pei me... make me want to go emo... den cute didi wish me to be not emo anymore... and elaine ask me not emo today... so i cant emo... and i oso got mself a bdae present... a book!! lol brisingr the 3rd book or eragon.... den dinner with parents at Changi...
ok so in the end i got many last min wishes... from tim... from cousin... from cute didi... from maple got bishop didi and baybe mummy and magget and many more... and pig didi and darling didi apparently forgot my bdae till i told them... carrot didi and arthur didi totally nev wish me cos i cant contact them... so did jolin jie lingling vale jamie mei... hui yee jie oso forgot.... alan kor oso.... haiz this year bdae wasnt as wad i expected.... thot got alot ppl pei me... in the end bo lang... and the last one who wish me happy bdae was yet again dominic didi.... haha he told me he wan be the first and last lol... so sweet xia... so i decided to call him baobei didi lol... and im going crazy le.... he only go off for few hrs... and im missing him alot... apparently i duno wad to do from now till he come back xia... i think i cant slp tonite le... super luv sick... and since my bdae is over... i got my rights to emo again ^^
4 Dec 2008
alrite maybe we are a bit crazy... last nite reach home.... den we called and tok all the way till 2am... den cant slp lol... den morning we called and tok again... xiao de.... haha lalallaa im going crazy le lol... haiz and emo at the same time... heard dominic didi playing "your call" on his guitar... den i started going emo.... and here u go... a change of song on my blog... haiz...
3 Dec 2008
lol today was quite enjoyable... dam fun lar... ok other than the poking part lols... anyways the fun part comes during the nite lolz... so lets talk about that... well after the performance the alumnis go abit xiao lar... so long nev fall in... den tried to fall in a squad... and everyone forgot the commands for falling out lol... ok den after that i went out with pig didi and i have a new didi... his name is dominic... ok and his so just-like-me keep poking me just like how i poke him.... and its amazing his just as emo and talks so much like me... and guess what!! i found somone who has lesser leg and hand hair den me lol!! well we went to compasspoint to eat.... ate burger king.... den on the way home we sot de... we decided to walk home instead of LRT... so we pei pig didi to his hse... den walk to dominic's hse... den we both duwan go home lol.... den sit at his hse below the playground... see starz... den tok alot of crap... tok from band to studies to work to ns etcetcetc... ya and the performance ends at 730 to 8... and i reach home at 12... 4 hrs of non stop toking.... lolz... me suddenly so xiao... and well gona slp soon... dominic say wan sms me... till now haven recieve yet leh... haha think pig didi's slping... must be dam tired =p
2 Dec 2008
lol they had amazing race today... dam fun... haha i pei pig didi and carrot didi group... was dam fun lar.... and i managed to hug pig didi for the first time lol... =p hehe... bbq was not bad.... as in the fun... not the food.... the food sux totally... satay was not cooked... taste worse than sashimi.... so jelly like de... chicken wing got blood de... heng i nev eat... and yeah me and pig didi share food lor haha... the two of us practically went crazy today... and den well after that we had combined alumni band... went a bit emo after seeing some people... haiz... duno y.... gona be unable to slp again.....
haiz i feel so emo... im not sure wad to do... or when this will ever end... there are so many things going on my mind... its like gona explode... firstly im still worrying about my didis.... den i worry if we will still be together forever.... i really dun wana lose them.... den i keep thinking of wads gona happen next time... everytime i think about my future... i just dun see a bright one ahead.... i just see a lonely person walking down the road... no matter how i try to calm myself down... it just doesnt seem to work... things or people will just remind u of the emo stuff... haiz.. i really duno if i love u... or i hate u.... its more of a both... i love u alot... and i hate u just as much for not loving me back.... haiz... i keep worrying bout u... ur studies... ur life... but i know i have to let go somehow... and im not sure if letting u go will be a right thing... if leaving u will give u that happiness... i would rather trade my happiness for yours... =/
1 Dec 2008
Hehe today went back for band camp... really feel happy... din spend time with my didis for so long le =p and well yeah seeing somone makes me feel happy oso... and den i saw another somone... make me think of the past... haiz.... anyways wanted to stay overnite with pig didi... he told me we can share sleepin bag de... but den OWS duwan let me stay.... sianz...
30 Nov 2008
hey darling didi!! happy bdae ^^ luv u xmuakx <3 wish u a wonderful life ahead... and that we will continue loving one another =)
29 Nov 2008
neh today nth much bah... just a light last min shoppin.... den up the plane le haha
28 Nov 2008
today suppose to wake up at 3am... but well hehe look wads the time? its already 9 lol.. din go for the auction bah... only go market see the fish and eat....
after that went to shop the whole day... went to some place called toyota town.. its dam cool... nice scenery... took lots of pics.... den went to electric town to shopshop... actually parents say wana buy wii psp and ds... in the end i duwan bah... duwan buy things that my didis have.... wan them to have something i dun have... so they will feel they have something better ^^ bought quite some anime stuff again... and yeah went to play pachinko and jackpot today.. pachinko dam hard win xia... such a small hole how the ball get in leh.... so ya lost quite alot there... den won quite a lot in jackpot.. got triple seven 4 times.... had a hard time changing for money... cos money changer close... den stupid people duno how speak english... keep saying cant exchange... den at last found interpreter say tmr morn den can... so yeah... tmr i will be richer hahas... and tmr last min shopping den take plane back le ^^ piggy didi i miss u so much... i wana see u and tok to u again <3
27 Nov 2008
Frstly happy bdae carrot didi!! haha happy 14=p and yeah pls take care yourself... dun let anyone bully u k^^ luv u muakx <3 cya on monday in band haha
guess where i went today? haha went to disneysea... felt like a kiddy again lol... although the rides abit... erm kiddy for me... but quie enjoyed the place... it was fantastic... the shows were amazing... the service of crew members was absolute... and yeah wonderful experience.... since i went to disneyland twice... so decided not to go there... haven been to disneysea yet... haha... so go there trytry... and i bought lots of things back again.. well things were much expensive there than at ghibli lol... haha but i bought meself a snowman mickey its dam cute... and u cant find it anywhere else =p and a disneysea windbreaker lawls... alrite i gtg... tmr nid wake up at 3am go the tokyo fish market haha ^^
26 Nov 2008
today went to studio ghibli museum!! dam cool xia... all the anime stuff... bought quite alot of stuff... spent more than 150SGD on gifts... and since things are so ex... sry that my gifts maybe a bit small... bought myself a (forgot wads its name) totoro`s blue frend (if u know wad im toking about) haha den went to ramen museum... wanted to try the different ramens... i ate 2 bowls and i full liao cant try all lols... tmr leh depends on weather bah... if its nice and sunny i should be going disney sea... nev go b4 haha.... disneyland went twice so bored le if weather not really good den maybe shopping lors.... haha miss pig didi alot.... and darling didi too... sobs....
lastly i got a note for somone... u should know who u are... afterall im replying to somone's blog... life isnt as simple as u think... life isnt always fair... life is like a river... it has good times just like the waterfall upstream... it may have gentle times like the middle section... while at times life maybe like the lower stream whereby u meet obstacles and winding courses... wadeva u do... u still have to reach the sea.... u are a rock... your main objective is to reach the sea.... if u let your burden take over u.... u will end up like heavy bolders and sink to the floor... nev to reach ur goal... if u could reach your goals... good for you... but rmb that u had to persevere thru the long winding course... so life is like that... its up to u to choose what u want to become... dun let others choose for u.... it is your life.... not anyone else's... u should be the one who push yourself to get on with life... choose your own path... dun let anyone or anything stop u from reaching your goal... life is oso like a train ride... we get on... we ride... we get off... there are accidents and delays... at certain stops, there are surprises... some will translate into great moments of joy... others result in profound sorrow... a train too has to choose the path it takes... so would u.... i hope u make a right choice.... so that u wun regret in your life.... i dun wan to be the one who stops u from your goal... if u will gain happiness from the choice u make... i rather u leave and forget me... and university will be tougher den jc.... double the workload and double the stress... rmb that wadeva happens... u will forever be in my heart... if u wana come back... i will still be there if u nid me... my last good byes....
25 Nov 2008
hehe today got alot things to tok about xia... so im gona break it into parts... firstly today went mount fuji... woke up at 5am(tokyo time) 4am (sg time) reached the train station at fuji.... took a stupid cab... cos bus nev go there today... den paid 100+ usd for a return trip.... go there see nth... too cloudy... zzz managed to get a glimpse at the snow capped top... and nth else...
next we went to a factotry outlet nearby... wanted to help tim buy his windbreaker... shun bian shopshop..... wah tell u ar.... even outlet stores here still so ex... come back still empty handed....
and lastly went to hot spring... dam cool xia.... the hot spring got 3 parts... indoors(must wear swimwear) outdoors 1 (must wear swimwear) and outdoors 2 (naked de) hehe pig didi u wana pei me mar? we strip and go in tgt? lol... no lar... i din go for the naked de.... dun dare.... so i just went for the wear swimwear places.... the outdoors de my fav.... got coffee bath... tea... wine... charcoal... waterfall and chilli bath.... its so cool... and when u get out of the bath... the wind blow that time so song.... the indoors de not that nice lar.... got one is flower bath... and another is the "dead sea" so much salt de.... my scratches on my legs make it so pain.... and u can literally float xia... anyway enough bout this... i duno y i keep thinking bout darling didi xia... dying to see him and hear his voice again.... haiz...
and i took the bullet train the first time.... dam fast when u see from outside... but inside cant feel a think de... lol... u can even walk to the toilet inide and pee or poop... u cant feel anything ^^
now is a comparison between osaka and tokyo... osaka more of a country side place... tokyo more city life... if u watch those shows like deathnote.... ya tokyo is more of those lor.... and definitely tokyo things more ex den osaka.....
compare china and japan.... china food is great and super cheap... japan food is oishii!!! but sibei ex.... china bus only pay 2rmb for whole ride = 40cents SGD mrt is oso same price for whole ride... taxi starts off with 2SGD and jumps 20cents japan bus more ex den train... duno y.... train tics can hit up to 16 USD and taxi starts with 6.80 USD and jumps 80 cents china is boring... but japan rox ^^
last of the last... im being told by so many ppl that im being missed lol... hey peeps its just 1 week leh... dun so despo k? haha =p i be back on the 30th ^^
24 Nov 2008
haiz today raining... den alot things cant do... sit in hotel oso cant do anything... only got 2 adapters.... charge handphone charge camera no more for laptop... so i used the desktop at the lobby... lol... nth to do le... miss eeu pig didi.... yeah anyway pig didi asked me to go to the band camp... so i go lor... pei him and oso can take care of him... haha xmuakx lub eeu
23 Nov 2008
hi all... sry for not updating... china bo internet xia... sianz... i now in japan... got free internet!! woots!!! but sian bo maplesea... haha so yeah now im gona update all the weeks posts... slowly read bah ^^ scared go sg no time post lol...
22 Nov 2008
haha tmr flying to tokyo... cant wait xia!!! lol... anyways dam miss darling didi... dreamt of him last nite... hugging him and kssing him tightly non stop... lol luv him so much... wonder if he can feel it... eee... anyways tday must go buy souvenir... i come china 1 week still haven bought anything back...
hehe i bought meself my first souvernir or the trip... a new dizi(chinese flute) lol... it costs me 60 sg dollar xia... wanted to buy one for joon xia... his eyeing on one.. but so ex parents sure wun allow... haha anyway gtg le... if not tmr cant wake up on time for flight ^^
21 Nov 2008
omg im getting so pig xia... everyday wake up eateateat den go back slp... walao... somore woke up so late... slp so early... really pig sia... haha miss pig didi... he in msia cannot sms me... i think he oso pigging there lar lol...
today's dinner sux... worst food i ever had here... but supper rox xia!!! chocolate sundae!!! haha... ate till i was shivering... when i wash my hands with cold water.. ite felt warm!! lol.... hey pig didi wan some? haha i know choc ice cream ur fav... and u wun have it in msia de ^^ open ur mouth arrhhhhmmmm.... haha lub u piggy muakx <3
20 Nov 2008
haiz last nite dreamt about arthur didi... duno why leh... haiz maybe i just missed him too... and i miss darling didi... and carrot didi too... all 3 nev say goodbye to me b4 i leave de sobs maybe dey dun luv me liaos sobs... well at least i still got pig didi with me haha =) and yeah i think im having a bad flu... sneezed alot times le... today went summer palace... and guess what? looks the same as all the other chinese palaces... wonder y all the emperors got no taste...
19 Nov 2008
haiz kept smsing pig didi... make me miss him so much xia... duno if can sms him or not.... haiz today went to great wall of china... nothing great about it.... just one long stretch of cold walls.... im starting to get irritated by those ah tiongs... tough some are ok... but most of them are dam selfish.. pushing their way through... duno how to say excuse me... bus driver just honked his way every 50m.. it just sux... shdnt have came... y din i listened to pig didi... he told me not to come... and i now feel his dam rite...
18 Nov 2008
wah today freaking cold xia... i think its negative temperature... super cold... freezing... but wun die so fast ^^ went forbidden city... duno what im supposed to see xia... all the palaces look same to me... duno what so great lol... looks the same to me... aiya duno lar... maybe im not interested in such stuff and pig didi must be missing me... cos he keep smsing me haha!!
17 Nov 2008
just reached kansai international airport in japan.... well im still waitin for my flight to china... next flight is at 6pm... so im stuck in the airport for 4 hours... sianz... anyways the first sms i recieved when i reach japan was from pig didi... he asked me where am i now.... and called me twice... lol i left sg a few hours so fast miss me... how to ren for one week? lol haha dun wry im safe.... plane trip was fine.., just watched a couple of movies... and yeah i sort of went emo in the plane and cried while thinking bout u 2 ='( dun wry im fine le... china is abit cold here... negative one degree i think... dun wry i got enough clothes wun die de ^^ alrite i wana slp le... its almost 12... just reached hotel lol...
16 Nov 2008
hey all i will be in japan and china for the next few days.. so i will post everytime i have internet access k? flight is next day 6am.... to my dar didis kor jies and meis.... and this somone pls take good care of urself... i wun be there but if u really miss me we could talk on msn or sms bah.... luv all ^^ look out for 1st dec peeps ^^
well yeah i couldnt slp... thinking of a few people... called this somone b4 i slpt... and found out that person thinking bout me b4 i called.. lol its not cincidence lar.... its our connection ^^ dun wry i will take care de k? i will be back in your arms in one piece haha
15 Nov 2008
Haiz was watching high school musical today... not bad the show... just that i started crying again... ='( thinking of some ppl.... haiz... and i went back montfort... just to have a last look at my didis bah... haiz... well really miss them alot... tried to spend some time with them for the last time b4 i fly off for 2 weeks...
13 Nov 2008
Happy bdae Jamie <3 haha lub u lots gib u free bdae hugs and kisses xmuakx!!
anyways today want to watch high school musical... but timing not good... so watched madagascar... dam funny xia... and some parts make me miss some people even more... den i end up breaking down again ='( haiz... and erm today lev 5 times... now lev 95 le... chiong mong x2 for few hrs nia... anyway i really going love sick liaoz.... haiz...
11 Nov 2008
happy bdae lingling meimei!! lol i duno wad to say herezz just wana tell u i lub u mei x3
9 Nov 2008
Haiz 8 more days b4 i leave sg... wonder if i will get the same love sick again.... i really miss darling didi... i just wana hear his sweet voice again... and his cute looking face ='( haiz i cant help but tearing at the thought of him =/
6 Oct 2008
Haiz ps for not updating... nth to update anyway..... been just idling and mapling around.... pw op tmr.... get results for promos... this sux...
5 Oct 2008
just one note for some fkers.... get the fk out of my life....
31 Oct 2008
yeah darling im still missing u.... haiz... y u always dun ans phone de =( haiz... today morning got pw.... did the skit.... den after that went to meet up with cute didi... neh it wasnt very nice day.... everything sux... den went for the concert... haiz... saw some people i missed alot... and saw some people that make me go more emo... haiz.....
28 Oct 2008
haiz daling didi... im missing u dam badly.... can u like pls call or sms me asap mar? haiz.... the same thing about carrot didi oso... i like nev see or talk to u all like so many mths le... im going crazy le...
27 Oct 2008
hehe i in cute didi hse... today i buy x2.... so maple x4... cheong till lev 80 haha... cos at home sure cant play de =p dam tired lar bb all i wana slp on his bed le...
26 Oct 2008
haiz life so boring without darling didi.... im like mapling everyday with no goal... i just wana be with darling didi... miss him alot... haiz =/
22 Oct 2008
Haiz... went totally emo... tearing during chinese lesson again... haiz... miss darling didi and pig didi badly... haiz... duno wad to do... i feel so lost...
20 Oct 2008
bored.... doing pw now... hand aching... think i typed since 8am... den twisted hand... haiz.... thinkin of darling didi badly... miss him alot... ='(
this is what i read in an email somone sent to me....
When you break her heart - [ the pain NEVER really goes away ] When she misses you - [ she's hurting inside ] When she says its over - [ she STILL wants you to be hers ] When she re-posts this bulletin - [ she wants you to read it ] When she walks away from you mad - [ Follow her] When she stare's at your mouth - [ Kiss her ] When she pushes you or hit's you - [ Grab her and don’t let go ] When she starts cursing at you - [ Kiss her and tell her you love her ] When she ignores you - [ Give her your attention] When she pulls away - [ Pull her back ] When you see her at her worst - [ Tell her she's beautiful ] When you see her start crying - [Just hold her and don’t say a word ] When you see her walking - [ Sneak up and hug her waist from behind ] When she's scared - [ Protect her ] When she lays her head on your shoulder - [ Tilt her head up and kiss her ] When she steals your favorite hat - [ Let her keep it and sleep with it for a night] When she teases you - [ Tease her back and make her laugh ] When she doesn’t answer for a long time - [ reassure her that everything is okay ] When she looks at you with doubt - [ Back yourself up with the TRUTH] When she says that she likes you - [ she really does more than you could understand ] When she grabs at your hands - [ Hold hers and play with her fingers ] When she bumps into you - [ bump into her back and make her laugh ] When she tells you a secret - [ keep it safe and untold ] When she looks at you in your eyes - [ don’t look away until she does ] - Stay on the phone with her even if she’s not saying anything -DON'T let her have the last word -DON'T call her hot, but gorgeous or beautiful is soo much better - Say you love her more than she could ever love you - Argue that she is the best girl ever - When she's mad hug her tight and don't let go - When she says she's OK don’t believe it, talk with her - because 10 yrs later she'll remember you - Call her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her you love her - Call her before you sleep and after you wake up - Treat her like she's all that matters to you - Tease her and let her tease you back -Stay up all night with her when she's sick - Watch her favorite movie with her or her favorite show even if you think its stupid - Give her the world - Let her wear your clothes - When she's bored and sad, hang out with her - Let her know she's important - Kiss her in the pouring rain - When she runs up at you crying, the first thing you say is; 'Who's ass am I kicking today baby?'
19 Oct 2008
went out with deidre jie... she say after exam wan shopping... so i pei her lor.... anyway she brought another 2 friends along whom i duno de.... im fine with it anyway.... den daron kor say wan go... den in the end quarrel with diedre jie den duwna go liao... haiz.... always like that de... anyway i bought like 8 disney jigsaw puzzels from minitoons... probably going to giv them out for v' day or b'day next year... haha.... found one for pig didi... its a picture of pooh and piglet under the blankie on the bed... yeah... piglet is pig didi and pooh is me!!! haha.. anyway very tired... so yeah play maple and slp...
18 Oct 2008
haiz.... spoil my mood again.... today after the wedding buffet lunch... came home and slp.... den so many people come disturb me... now i no mood slp le... den after that pr2 come lecture liao... another 30min gone... tmd so lor sor.... say everytime i nev communicate properly with them.. den say sometimes they got plans for me.. but if i got plans den must tell them... my plan is to go poly... did u allow that? i wan take bio did u allow that? NO! den wtf should i bother to communicate liao? u always think u are rite.. den me leh? fk.... no mood le... going church soon.... den off to dwedding dinner... gona drink up....
16 Oct 2008
wah today very sleepy... no wonder lar... pig didi last nite nev slp well today so tired.. now im tired too.... and well i got a new hair cut.... wanted to go for band... but well since its combine practice i decided to go home... cos cannot tok to pig didi.... and yeah at home... kena 1 and half hour lecture by laobu... sianz half... so tired that i fell aslp while being scolded... now mapling with kor lor... wonder if the piggy is still slping... haha if he is.... im gona sneak under his blanket and hug him and slp!!!
15 Oct 2008
Firstly happy bdae to my best friend clifford..... the bitch is turning 17 !!! yeahyeah and im still 16 lol.... haiz... no mood to laugh lar.... think i failed promos le.... not very well done... haiz... was very emo in the afternoon... lucky got cute didi pei me... although im still feeling emo.... but much better lor... played dota with didi.... haiz very long nev pei him le.... den told mum my results... then she kpkb... haiz duno wads the prob with parents lar... wadeva i do oso wrong de.... force me to go jc when i duwan go... force me to take physics when i practically hate physics... den now i dun do well u kpkb... English - C Chinese - C Chem - C Physics - E Maths - U Econs - U
my promos and mid year is opposite de... wadever i did well in mid yr sux at promos... wadever i did badly in midyr i did well in promos... chinese used to fail.... now get C... and one of the top in class.... and its a very difficult paper sommore.... GP improved from just pass..... Chem maintained... Physics from just fail to just pass.... maths from just pass to just fail... and econs from pass to undergraded.... haiz... say me mid yr nev study physics hard enough... now i study pass le u still complain... den spend more time on physics den maths fail u oso complain... typical singaporeans... only know how to complain.... only have eyes for bad stuff.... good stuff duno how compliment.... den bad stuff got all the criticism.... haiz... im in a terrible bad mood now....
sianz lar... everytime day in day out only know how kpkb.... so everything is my fault lor... go jc my fault lor... do badly in physics my fault lor... ask yourself lar... who force me go jc? who force me take physics... tok so much... now everything my fault lar? kns... u think i nev study for physics when i see the mid year results lar? only know how kpkb... nev even think b4 u tok... fk lar... forget it... lanlan liao... cannot promote den cannot promote lor...
11 Oct 2008
sian... today maple still so lag.... anyway now lev 66 gona lev again tonite ^^ so im faster than schedule... if good maybe tmr can lev twice again.... den monday... can lev 70.... den i wait maple no lag... den i go do 3rd job le ^^ muhahaha!!!
9 Oct 2008
sian xia.... today got hall assembly from 8am to 5pm lol... duno wad the principal got so much to tok about... anyway i take attendance after morning assembly.. den i go j8 eat breakfast le lol... den rush to NTUC below my hse buy things... cos pig didi say today last day of exam... den he wan come.... den ok lor.... wei le him... so i just pon school lor... haha now waiting for him to come ^^ last nite cant slp xia.... duno y... pig didi oso... say wan hug me to slp... in the end both hug till cant slp lols!!! den i keep dreaming of maple xia.... cos ytd died twice.... den last nite nitemare keep dyingzzz lame liao... kk pig didi coming le bb!!!
8 Oct 2008
wah sian xia... maple gm sux lar.. say last nite patch till today 230.... den in the end change to maintainence... tmr den patch.... den today maintain like majiam sai... kanasai lar... after maintain even more lag... den hai me lose 10%...die twice!!!
7 Oct 2008
lol paiseh last few days din post... so i posting today's monday and sunday de... been cheonging my maple.... i playing my cleric... seriously clerics are money making machines... i at MP3 1 day 5mil le.... and i started playing maple last monday... good gracious nev play for like 1 year or so le... yeah so i last stopped at lev 55... today 62 le.. tmr probably 64 if can... should hit 3rd job by next week.... duno how do 3rd job... cleric dmg so noob how kill grendel... and ya i never ever used any pots during training... heal and mp eater lasted me thru everything.... even my tele max use only 13mp now left bless and invinc to max... enough bout maple bah... today not good mood.... got chem mcq... after mcq duno y they return us paper 2 and 3 see results... din do really well... i think i got D or C bah... and if my best subject chem is so sucky... i dun see a way my other subjects can pass... dun even think can promote liao.... haiz.... but at least today got darling didi pei me tok... love him alot.... haiz... dun wana lose him.... anyway tmr no school... sian maple got maitainence from 11pm to tmr 230.... wth.... den duno how level... maybe i dun ask much... lev once oso shiok.... and if lucky cute didi maybe wan come my hse... yeah ok i go slp le nitenite...
6 Oct 2008
sianz today got physics mcq.... think i really die le.... duno can promote mah....
5 Oct 2008
got a freaking nitemare.... dreamt of tmr paper.... xiao eh.... freaking me out.... walao....
2 Oct 2008
happy bdae delphine goh!! haha...
anyway i had a dream last nite... dreamt about darling didi carrot didi and pig didi.... haiz... duno y leh.... maybe i miss them too much thats all... sobs...
1 Oct 2008
Today went to watch mama mia and deagle eye... both not bad... love mama mia... damn funny... den some idiot pr2 spoil the whole mood... blooody ass... anyway i did cry during the mama mia... duno y i keep thinking of carrot and darling didi... haiz.... miss them alot... den after that went to clarke quay to celebrate cousin's bdae at jumbo... and i feel so high... we kept talking... and i drank only 3 cups today... but feeling damn hot.... muhahaha....
29 Sept 2008
sianz... today suppose to watch movie with tim de.... den in the end cancel... so i went cute didi hse... supposed to teach him on wed... but changed to today cos wed going out watch movie with "family" anyway... very bored now... cos giddy playing his com... and elaine siting behind me now watching me blogzzzzz and im starting to miss pig didi and darling didi again... haiz wish they beside me now xia.... miss them so badly... sommore my head very pain.... got headache... my leg still very pain...not recovered... i wana play with darling didi and pig didi... miss being with them... sobs.... so sian xia.... giddy duwan tok... keep playing his com...
28 Sept 2008
hehe... watching the F1 grand prix... Masa so suay... from first become one of the last... first time i see somone run off from pit stop before the fuel finish... den the pipe line kena torn... den another guy almost kena oso... heng he kena stopped... hehe den both ferraris out lor... the other one Raikkonen leading 3rd den crashed... muahaha anyway im gona slp le... tmr physics!!! yeah man gona finish the last exam!!!
27 Sept 2008
hehe paiseh last few days din blog again... today read tim's blog and did the same test....
Your view on yourself: You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward. You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.
The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for: You are a true romantic. When you are in love, you will do anything and everything to keep your love true.
Your readiness to commit to a relationship: You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.
The seriousness of your love: You are very serious about relationships and aren't interested in wasting time with people you don't really like. If you meet the right person, you will fall deeply and beautifully in love.
Your views on education You may not like to study but you have many practical ideas. You listen to your own instincts and tend to follow your heart, so you will probably end up with an unusual job.
The right job for you: You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.
How do you view success: You are confident that you will be successful in your chosen career and nothing will stop you from trying.
What are you most afraid of: You are afraid of things that you cannot control. Sometimes you show your anger to cover up how you feel.
Who is your true self: You are full of energy and confidence. You are unpredictable, with moods changing as quickly as an ocean. You might occasionally be calm and still, but never for long.
hmmm all of them quite true... especially the romance and the moodswing!!! think all those in the family would know this is true muahaha... same with the career... i think that as long as im happy and interested in the career i'll just grab it!!!
another test...
What's your personal love style?
You desire a love that will last forever. You are quite serious about finding this type of love, and that's why you think carefully about the men that you meet before deciding whether you could really love them. You don't just develop a crush on someone overnight: you look at a person's personality and other aspects of their life before deciding to form an attachment. If a guy doesn't meet your expectations, you would rather be alone. Your love has to be perfect. Be careful though, you could be missing out on some worthy relationships because your standards are so high.
hehe quite true... accept that it should be women not men =)
25 Sept 2008
hehe constance goh!!! happy bdae!!! lol... my cousin bdae today... haha dun think she got celbration mood her o's coming!!! suay haha my bdae after my o's muahahaha!!! anyway chem ytd was manageable... todays econs was so freaking hell!!! impossible to pass unless instead of giving bullshit... i gave cow dung!!! hehe the questions were so direct xia... what are the causes for inflation? lol... super direct... i thot they would like kill people by asking about how government can solve unemployment by using monetary tools... cos inflation and unemployment are linked somhow... hehe maybe i think too hard... yup tmr chinese... better not fail... i dun like the taste of failing!!! and ya tmr i'll be teaching cute didi his exam stuff... and monday is dooms day physics!!! muhahaha
23 Sept 2008
wah... today maths hor... okok lor.... wun say too god or too bad lar... should be able to pass lor... cos i got time finish almost everything... so wun be as crazy as last year a maths prelim... haiz now im really going crazy bout chem... last nite i had some last minute maths revision... everything i study i memoriesd.... now last minute revision... nth goes into my head!!! argh!!! si liao... kisiao liao...
22 Sept 2008
Hehe english wasnt as hard as expected... the application question seemes easy liao haha... and its the first time in my life i never complained that im scared the day b4 exam xia!!! hehe maybe its because i talk too much to cute didi last nite... den got no chance to think about exams hehe... luv euu cute didi!! xmuakx and yes happy bdae jie!!! luv u 4ever xmuakx!!!
19 Sept 2008
Haiz... parents can never understand the diff of children now... they used to claim that they too have been at our age... they understand how we feel... the load from stress... from friends... and in school... but no... i dun feel that way... it has been like many years since they have been children of our age... the are the children of the 20th century and we are from the 21st... it is impossible for them to understand the stress of modern children... their so called freedom from 20th century is totally diff from the 21st century... and so are their stress... what stress do they have? school work? no... i dun think so... if they call school work stress... then ours are ticking bombs? they call going home stress? den ours would be a raging war.... no... they can never understand how it feels to be a 21st century kid.... neither would we when we have children.. for they belong to an even newer generation.... haiz... just how do parents mind work? imgaine yourself studying... and they claim u never study hard enough... u turn on the com for a few minutes... and they say u play too long... they claim they give u freedom... but they dun allow u to choose the school u wana go to... they dun let u choose which course u like... what is this??? they claim they have your interests in heart... but do they see that we have no interests in what they think? yes... this may be a one sided view.... when we become aprents... we may too feel the same way... but at least we should have a little talk about "my interests" rather than "your interests"... u have always been seeing things from your view... i think that its time to see from our point of view.... a note to all parents who read this... try to understand your child's feelings... dun try to sell your thoughts into your child... it wun work... it may cause more hurt...
18 Sept 2008
well today was kinda bored... nth to do... haiz been thinking... y do i treat people so well... y do i put in so much love for all my didis... now i realised something... i just want to make evreyone in the world feel loved... no one... i repeat... no one in this world... deserved not to feel loved... be it famous people... or even beggars... and animals... every living being in this world needs love... and that is y i want to reach my love out for everyone who needs GOD... for god so loved the world that he gave his only begotten son... and thru god's love we should touch the hearts of everyone =) i dun nid to expect people to love me back... as long as there are people in this world... ready to accept my love... im willing to give my love to them...
17 Sept 2008
hmm... im slacking at home.... haiz... very exhausted... no energy to solve all my probs... dying on the bed.... haiz... missing lots of people badly...
16 Sept 2008
hehe today nev stay back after school... study too much very tired... wana slack a bit at home... anyway next two days no sch... haha can slack all i wan =p... but cant lar got to study a bit... dun feel like failing promos haha...
15 Sept 2008
heyhey duno y today appettite bigbig.... just like the allen walker xia... eat dinner liao... den still eat 6 breads.... den ate one packet of peanuts and one bottle of coke... woah!!! and hor last night cant slp xia... thinking and missing somone badly... and cos afternoon slpet so long... at nite oso cant slp lar...
haiz... im just thinking... maybe i know y i feel that im not being loved and cared for by anyone... in fact i think i am being loved... especially by my didis and this family.. is just that i cant feel it... but thats the bad part of me... i only know things when i can feel it... becos i cant feel their love... tts y i think im not being loved at all... haiz how silly of me....
14 Sept 2008
Hmm today my body abit kisiao... woke up at 630.... den i went out of house... den dun feel like going home... reach home only about 11am... den bathe den go out again... lol siao hor? went out for lunch... den came home... bathe again zzzz den fell aslp.... slp till 530 6pm like tt... den go my ahma hse.... ate dinner there... den come home.... duno y lar but im abit not myself these few days lor... often moodswings every few minutes.... sometimes 1 min moodswing few times.... den no appetite... can survive without food the whole day... (those who know me knows that im like allen walker... eat alot de...) i think im just thinking too much... exam haven start.... i think about whats happening after exam... whether i will get promoted... or i will run overseas.... haiz... den sometimes i think of gaming and stuff i would do after the first week of exam... oh and here comes even bigger prob... i start thinking that this family is gona fall apart soon... looking at the way things are happening... and i start thinking if i will just like be a hermit in class... stick to one corner and keep quiet... and whether i should quit band... cos ive totally lost interest liao... not about the music... its just that i still cant find a sense of belonging here... and whether i made a right choice in coming nyjc... cos i totally feel out of place here.... i dun find a sense of pride or loyalty to nyjc... haiz... more freaking probs coming to my mind... well so if u do really see me breaking down... yeah u should know whats happening ='(
13 Sept 2008
Haiz... today is kors birthday.. and no one else in this family remembers.... sobs... he must be feeling damn sad.... last nite at 12 am i asked if they know what today was... and the answer was.... ur bdae mare? urs is dec wad.... kor bdae? cannot be... den i was like... wth... den the reply was cannot be leh its not written on my calender...
anyway kor wana wish u a happy bdae... hope u will take care of yourself... and find your own happinss somehow =/ and if u still nid me as ur didi again... i hope u will come back to me too ='(
10 Sept 2008
Hmm these few days busy in sch till 9 pm... studying + watching a new anime d. gray-man... and playing dekaron lol... my everyday schedule... play dekaron from lesson end till 5pm... go eat dinner.... den watch d. gray-man till 6pm... study till 830pm.... den watch till 930pm... den trodd off home!!! haha.... den go home bathe on com watch more d. gray-man!!! lol addicted to that anime liao.... bleach and naruto still on making... so cant watch.... my cute didi and darling didi intro de... now i get hooked on oso lol... cant wait till 2.5 weeks from now... 1.5 week from now exam start.... 2.5 week lata.... left only 2 papers.... chem and physics.... practically first week of exam alot of things... second week of exam only got physics on monday.... tues and thurs is study break (dun think i nid that only mcq study wad) wed is hari raya and childrens day... fri me no h2 chinese.... den 3rd week left physics and chem mcq... easy peasy!!! haha so after 2 and half weeks i cheong dekaron liao... and after my didis exams.... i gona get closer to them ^^ haha =)
8 Sept 2008
Cute didi time passed so fast le hor? Its been 3 years since we first met le... Rmb 3 years ago u told me u say u wana be band major? Now finally got red slash le hor? Gratz U have done well! Whats left is now your studies. It doesnt matter whether u go poly or jc. Dun wry about that. Trust in God n he will guide u. Yeah and dun wry bout getting a gf too k? Dun get too despo. The right girl will come de its a matter of when only. Hope everything goes well for u. Just rmb to trust in god for everything u do in life. And just wana tell u that u shd be more caring and unds towards others. Thanks for being such a lovely didi... Pig didi told me to wish u a happy bdae too =) Haha. Have a gd year ahead. Hope to get closer to all of u in this family too LuvS eeuS XxXmuakXxX
yep and today is the first day of school... and oso cute didi bdae... haha he so suay =p didi careful dun kena bdae bash hor!!! haha paiseh kor no longer in montfort cant be your shield le sobs ='( anyway today had maths test... its damn screwed up... duno how do.... den chinese tcher make whole class stay back cos we nev finish homework... now trying to "copy" some zhuo wen examples from internet... no mood think... had major moodswings today.... 1min happy 1 min crazy 1 min high another min emo another min pissed off another min f up... haiz... all cos of stupid exams... and i just found out my didis oso having exams 2 weeks from now... that makes it that i cant teach them anymore... no time liao... haiz... they just have to study themseleves... jiayou all!!!
6 Sept 2008
Haiz i feel so pathetic and useless... haiz... even a simple family conversation oso cannot work... everyone just choose to hang up or not tok... starting with school problem.... den social problem... den stress shit... followed by some f up promo exam... now family problem comes in... if this goes on im seriously gona xplode liao... it just goes to show how pathetic i am... and how i cant control my life at all ='(
5 Sept 2008
Playing com whole day... morning cheong dekaron till lev 35... den cousin came my hosue... we play CS resident evil version.... Me him and PR versus 20 dagger bots.... abit xiao eh... we use pistol until no bullet.... den almost die... lucky got spare SMG... haha... bored...
4 Sept 2008
Haiz this few days leh so boring... damn lonely and nothing to do... suposed to go out with ppl... but no one wana go out... all busy... or duwan go out... haiz... stupid holidays.... so i sit at home all day cheonging dekaron... segita hunter rox!!! lol... 2 days cheong lev 3X liao!!! quite slow lar got ppl hit 8X already... duno they xiao de how so fast train xia... must be 24hr play.... cos dekaron just started ytd.... yeah and i training 2 chracters at one go... so a bit hard.... anyway today been going around shopping for presents... lots of birthdays coming soon!!! must stock up liao!!!
1 Sept 2008
Haiz feeling very down the whole day.... cant help but feel this whole holiday is gona be worse than the june holidays... this sux... i dun even get to see anyone from this family at all... haiz... all i just wan is to pei just 1 person from this family... just spend 1 day with anyone... but no ones free... ='( haiz... none of them understand my feelings now... im not blaming anyone for not accompanying me anymore... im so used to it liao.... everywhere i go... whnever i need somone... no ones there... just sick of all these... haiz always hated holidays...
31 Aug 2008
went to comex today... bhought myself a new sony cybershot camera.... cost $499... well cause i lost my old camera in osaka... so have to get a new one... supposed to be happy... but i dun feel happy at all... haiz... last nite couldnt slp.... woke up every 5 min.... den today whole nay no spirit.... very unfocused whole day... haiz... duno wad to do.... tmr leh... dun think i going out with anyone... supoosed to celebrate cute didi bdae 1 week in advance... but he chose to spend his time with his pri sch friends instead... haiz... den pig didi gona celebrate duke's bdae with his other classmate... wah duke nev invite me go!!! jkjk i duwan go lar... all sec 1 den i only j1... abit kisiao.... anyway dun think can spend time with darling didi oso... he rather stay home and play com lor... haiz haiz haiz.... sad beyond hope...
this is for somone.... this somone should know who im refering to.... im really at my wits end... everyone out there or at least i am damn worried about u.... so pls stop acting like nothings happen... u can try to hide from everyone.... but u cant hide things from me... i can feel your emotions coming out from u by just looking at u or talking to u.... i feel so irritated by just seeing u.... i cant help but feel helpless.... u used to be so close to me... and yet i cant do anything to help... im just like the great wall of china.... a family member just for show... i cant do anything... i dun care how u treat me.... u can treat ur classmates or ur friends better than me... its ok... im used to your ways liao... but dun stop me from trying to help u... its very unfair.... u go around trying to help others... if they dun accept u stubbornly try to force them to change to the way u want them to be... and when others try to help or change u... u stubbornly refuse to give in... for the sake of everyone cant u think of how others feel before making a decision... ur imprudent act will just hurt everyone.... i know that u will get hurt if u read this... but i rather hurt u and let u know wads wrong with urself than pretend that everythings fine... u may think that u r being selfless and helpful... yes i agree sometimes u are like that... but when u go overboard.... u r making people deem u as selfish and only thinking about urself.... about how u want others to be.... theres nothing wrong in trying to change peoples life... i agree that wad u do is remarkable... but if others dun wan... pls dun force them to submit to ur requests... it will just hurt everyone... and it will cause u to be emo as well... think about it.... u r not the only one who faces stress everyday... infact there are others who face even more problems than u... be happy that u dun face financial difficulties... u dun come from a broken home.... u have friends... u dun need to hide or run away from law.... u got the money to pursue an education... so just be glad that u are fortunate to lead a life... others dun even get a chance to live... people everywhere are being murdered... babies aborted... people dun even have money to get their basic necessities... they dun even nid to tok about schooling... so what if u suffer from some health problems? people are suffering from incurable diseases... they suffer from the agonising pain from cancer... u always tok about dying.... but do u know that some dun even get a chance to live... so what if u have stress in studies? u still score as the top in level... others cant even get a chance to study.... so what if ur family quarrel at home? some dun even noe who their parents are! and i should give a piece of advice to u... be content with wad u have... appreciate what others are doing for u... dun regret or treasure things only when they are lost =/ thats what i have learned from my 16 years on earth... i duwan u to learn from the painful mistakes i made... if u still wana stick to ur way... den go ahead no ones gona stop u.... pretend u never read this... we can still become friends... but we wun be as close anymore... or u can try to learn and change... its ur own choice... make a good one... dun end up regreting... =/
uploaded a new song to this blog... its called Kimi o Nosete.... which means carrying you.... its a song from studio ghibli animation film Laputa the Castle in the Sky.... its the opening part of animation medley... love it alot... haiz keep thinking of somone when i hear this...
29 Aug 2008
paiseh last few days nev post... cos nth much happen... hmm today tchers day celebration... planned to take attendance den zao away.... lol then lilan told me "eh u not guilty ar? i plan so hard for this celbration den u like tt!!! wad kinda friend xia!!!" hehe actually i feel quite guilty.... but im sry i nid to zao to my secondary school.... its juz that... i dun find a sense of belonging in nanyang.... haiz... well... went to J8 to eat breakfast at mac... den took a bus to montfort... its great to see familiar faces again!!! got jeremy... zerah... joseph... and many more... yes espeially that bitch!!! miss u damn alot xia!!! u ass!!! damn u bitch!!! nev take time to contact with me xia!!! argh!!! hack u!!! haha but its good to see u back again lol.. missed the times when me u and daron went wild!!! lol... yeah really missed those days... haiz... i think i going emo again.... really missed the times i spent with the two of u... den i went over to primary school.... saw many old teachers again... haha yeah OLD!!! lol stupid korkor anyhow suan tcher say they old!!! wait till u grow old ar!!! haha... well yeah kor followed me go over... or at least i followed him there... yeah and well thot i could spend some time with him... well it obviously din work... he juz ran off to his scouts friends as soon as he got there.... haiz... suan le... i juz go home myself bah... suppose to pei pig didi today... but he ran off without me.... so i go home alone lor... den now im juz rakioning and bleaching... and narutoing... well yeah i juz wana say it again... i miss those days with you two!!! 26 Aug 2008
Feeling damn sick... flu... sore throat... headache... haiz... so today halfway i take early leave... went see doctor... get some medicine... and well go home... tried the new iphone... not that good actually... neh dun think i wana use it... my ipods good enough... yeah dekaron's quite fun... i enjoy... maybe im gona introduce to darling didi after his end of year exam... this game got nice effects... and cool skills haha... quite different from other games... cos this game got blood.... and gore... monsters body parts can fly out... and it can like break into two... lol thats horrible... but makes the game fun ^^
25 Aug 2008
Feeling damn f up now... wth ur prob xia... stupid pr2.... nev find out resons den anyhow scream... u where not happy? bloody hell... he kena marks on his hand den anyhow say me... his own daiji lar he wan play... den he kena anything come say me... ytd oso u say u play kena anything ur daiji... now still wan come find me... not happy say lar... everytime so hypocrite... dun make me repeat this again... i dun care wth happens to u and pr... tts wad u get for giving me probs... u noe wad? i have never treated pr as a family... his juz a pr... likewise... i thot u were somone understanding... but its all bullshit... juz scram off my life!
24 Aug 2008
splendid morning... slept till 10... den zombie till 11+... went to plaza sing watch 2 movies today... watched journey to centre of the earth and mummy.... haha... den in show suddenly think of jamie xia... den walk out of cinema i started thinking of korkor... den he suddenly appear in fromt of me.... scary xia... =p den ate dinner.... den came home... watch the olympic closing ceremony... blahblahblah... pig didi starting to dao me oso =/ sianz...
22 Aug 2008
Today went back nanyang... nid help maply for nanyang sch song... they go some studio at commonwealth to record... nth much lar... juz very tired after recording over again and over again... but enjoyed it tough... nev go recording studio b4 haha... den now i at home... lata lie on bed den conk out le... i now reading blog.... den found some posts... this "poem" belongs to somone... quite agree with it...
Love
Love is patient, Love is Kind Love is not Jealous, is not proud
is not puffed up, it does not behave badly love does not easily get angry it does not think evil
love does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth. love bares all things, believes all things, hope all things, endure all things.
love never fails. =)
well i hope u find your true love too ^^ wish u all the best...
21 Aug 2008
Haha last few days been talking to darling didi.... so happy... miss him alot... nev talk to him so long le... paiseh didi i busy mar... korkor give u baobao k? today went back montfort.... returned the flute.... and pei pig didi lol... he so funny lar... keep poke me.... so diao.... and always talk about prawns... so know how disturb me hor? kok ur head den u noe!!! today i abit ki siao... i spent like $10 plus to print my scores.... i used up all the papers in the printing machine... and have to put in sommore... hehe i wana go pig le haha!!
20 Aug 2008
Haiz... having lots of slpless nites... and i cant seem to study anymore... i haven been able to do any tutorials.. i cant even answer one question completely... haiz... im hopeless and pathetic... =/
19 Aug 2008
Hiaz... ive been pondering over some of William tan's words from ytd... He said that we should use our small life to touch others... When we do something, do it not to complete what we are suposed to do.... go for whats beyond... Maximise what you are good at... and use it to make others life better... haiz... been moodswinging very lately again.... =/ juz hope i dun go emo in class.... alrdy very irritated by some people in class... u know who you are... stop doing it... its damn irritating... it may be fun for you to disturb me... but its not fun to get disturbed by all of you!!!
18 Aug 2008
well firstly i want to adress some issues... ive been reading some blogs during pw lesson today... and yeah i think u shd know who u r... whosever blog i read... if u think im giving problems to ur life... fine... as i have said in my post on 9 Aug 2008 as well as 23 Feb 2008... i will stop bothering about ur life... since u have chosen to keep ur life this way... =/ if u ever nid me i will still be there... but i cant promise we will ever be as close again....
and erm i pon chinese today... went to VJC to meet Dr. William Tan... for pw interview and stuff... haiz duno today dun feel well... maybe last nite din slp well... cant slp.... and im down with headache... haiz... i go eat le... nev eat since lunch... lata kena stomachflu...
17 Aug 2008
Haiz early in the morning feel so f up.... asshole pr2... no apparent reason anyhow shout... ppl wan slp oso cannot.... weekend is to let u slp more u wan wake me up for wad? nabei... u wan wake up early your daiji lar!!! den anyhow scream wad early in morning fresh muz study... knn stay with me 16 years liao still duno me well... limpei early in morning cannot study de... my study is from 12pm to 10pm only... after that or before that cant study de!!! stupid idiot!!!
16 Aug 2008
Haiz... woke up today... feeling that somethings missing from my life... actually its a lot of things... haiz.. i miss lots of people... especially those who make my world go round... kor... clifford... darling didi... and this somone... haiz... how i wish i could be with them... i really wanted somone whom i can rely on.... i wan somone to be there whenever im alone... i duwan to be alone ='( i miss all of you!!! =/
anyway my nose almost dropping out... sneeze alot... think kena flu... feel like chopping it off xia!!! muz be pig didi got flu... duno y when my loved ones sick i can feel de... den i will kena sick oso =) haha actually i thot only i sick... den tonite dun dare slp with pig didi in case he kena sick... in the end he tell me he actually oso sick zzzz haha so tonite can baobao him go slp le ^^
13 Aug 2008
sian xia... i feel like kena cheated... waited 1 hr plus for band to start... den finally i found out today no band... sian xia if not i could have went home earlier... yeah and im watching the beijing olympics opening ceremony retelecast... and tmr got physics test.... trying to study and watch... and im so tired... i feel like slping xia... haha think i got connection with pig didi xia... everytime he feel something i will oso feel that de... k time to go dreamland le!!! didi baobao shui jiao!!! xoinkx!!!
12 Aug 2008
Haiz.. abit pissed off in school today... some ppl keep toking bout me... den still wan take my phone... so i juz shouted the F word across the room lor... paiseh.... having some moodswings these days... think cos alot of things that im unable to settle... yeah well.... nth much to say about... juz thinking of kor... miss him alot... and to guys from 0808 if u wana read my blog its fine... theres no need to hide from me ya noe? its not like i cant see everyone trying to see my blog using the com beside the bookshop... i can see from afar.... the color so obvious... den see me come still wan alt+f4.... tts so lame... and pls respect others privacy... i cant stop wads coming from your mouth... but pls stop touching my stuff k? especially those trying to pry open my privacy....
11 Aug 2008
well as expected.... went out alone... i went to PS at like 1pm.... see the cinema queue so long... den siansian shopshop around... den go the cathay.... there nobody xia... dunnit queue to buy ticket de... den cute didi say wan come find me... den lata say duwan... xiao gina.... watched money no enough 2 damn funny xia.... whole cinema roaring with laughter... den went to paragon that area walkwalk... ate some jap food for dinner... and den went home... today like not so fun leh... i not in a very happy mood xia... see korkor in this state... i oso very xim tia.... den elaine and cute didi wana quarrel sommore.... haiz... lucky got piggy didi to comfort me.... if not i sure go emo de...
10 Aug 2008
Haiz... started drinking after dinner... im feeling too down... and too miserable.... haiz... i wish i can sleep and nev wake up... den can forever be in dreamland with piggy didi... haiz... how fortunate it would be when u are being cared and loved for by your loved ones... haiz... how i wish i could experience being loved and cared for once again...
9 Aug 2008
yeah new post lol... juz wana say happy national day b4 i slp ^^ HAPPY NATIONAL DAY!!! lolzzzz
haiz dunoy but feeling very blue for the whole day... feel abit uneasy... and i cant keep calm... think something happen... haiz... it feels so different toking to u now... we seem to be worlds apart... i duno wads going on... and juz dun wana tell me... im juz losing my hopes on you le... and we cant even have a chat without one of us keeping silent... or both of us quarreling... haiz... if thats the way we are going to be... den i shd juz step out of ur life... i dun wana make u more miserable than u already are... maybe i shd even step out of this family... maybe i shd juz "keep" pig didi darling didi and cute didi... and go on with life... think it shd be much better... im feeling so miserable.... life sux.... but i have to go on... and the only person i can have support from is piggy didi.... haiz...
yeah was watching bleach... listened to one of the ending songs... its called daidai... this is the english translation for the song... theme sad...
Daidai
i can’t figure out what’s going on with eyes that see black and white i tried to do my best there is nothing i can do for you
back then.. something gave me excitement gave me satisfaction do i really know myself?
don’t go anywhere please don’t go anywhere
i would like to return there why is it so heavy now? back then i.. like yesterday, coudn’t think anymore don’t go back please don’t go anymore
i know i can’t walk with my eyes closed alone.. eyes closed i know i can’t always go towards the sky alone.. under the sky
like always, i hurt you with my words i politely asked.. what i can reach now.. don’t go anywhere anymore please don’t go anymore let’s not walk any further please don’t go anymore don’t walk more than me let’s not walk any further i can’t walk any further
8 Aug 2008
piggy didi!!! xmuakxmuakxmuakxmuakxmuakxmuakxmuakxmuakx kiss u 8 times... on the 8th year... 8th month... 8th day.... 8th hour... 8th min... 8th sec... cool hor? haha.... i really send didi this xia... think i love him till i sot le lol... i seriously think i fall for him le lor... he so cute... love him alot!!! not the BGF type of fall in love lar... its the love didi alot type lar... today shdnt have went school... nanyang jc seriously duno how plan events de.... so kns... shd have went to montfort... today montfort got carnival.... haiz remind me of sec 3 xia... that time i pei my cutedidi... den think of sec 4.... pei joon and my darling didi.... wished this yr can pei darling didi and cute didi and piggy didi... but dun think i will be allowed in... haiz... so sad... yeah and den after the dumb celebration den went VCH... had lots of fun with that crazy nicole and crazy june... both sot de... keep laughing... lol... den we sing songs like tian tian ye ye... fall for you... and your call... haha den me and nicole went emo.... think she got PMS xia... a while happy a while crazy a while sad.... yeah and then cute didi came with elaine.... and none of them even bothered to get me a present xia.... gerald lim and terence lim oso... gerald gd xia bring one girl there... lol den stupid terence play gooseberry... xtra xia... anyway after concert actually wan go watch movie de... so we walked down clarke quay.... damn!!! remind me of the whitley concert 2 yrs ago.... me and didi went to watch... den we slowly walk along that area... haiz... y am i so stupid??? y am i keep thinking bout such stuff xia... den the earliest show end at 130 like that... den both "kids" cant reach home so "early" so i got no choice but to pei them home lor... den cute didi got abrasion at his groind there.... den ask him if nid me carry him back... he say dunnit... den nvm lor... haiz wished pig didi was here with me xia.... wana spend time with him.... dad came and fetched cute didi back home... anhe practically fell aslp in the car... heng xia he got wake up... wan ask me carry him to his bed? xiao ar... my both legs wan break le leh... see them like that den offered to pei them watch movie de.. shd be slping with pig didi by now le lor... and its like national day le... lol.... now is after midnight le leh!!! nvm i go new post...
7 Aug 2008
haiz damn irritated during lessons xia... bloody hell keep kena irritated by ppl during lesson... keep saying bout me... and me flirting with guys and firls like i bisexual like tt... and den i atkked ppl... slap + scratch lol... last time i tried that was sec 4... nev tried it again till now xia... haha... den today whole day in school play omok during lessons lol... cant help not listening... damn stressed...
6 Aug 2008
omg... so damn happy!!! cute didi finally said i love you korkor.... lol wait 3 years le finally said this once zzzz take so long lol... but nvm once is enough le ^^
5 Aug 2008
hmmm... was watching bleach... den somewhere they mentioned about... It doesnt matter what others say u shd be... whats more important is what u wan urself to be... think its kinda true actually... maybe i shd hack care bout what others feel bout me bah ^^ yeah and i got a new song... heard it during one of the GP lectures den felt it quite nice...
Listen To Your Heart
I know there’s something in the wake of your smile I get a notion from the look in your eyes, yeah you’ve built a love but that love falls apart your little piece of heaven turns too dark
listen to your heart when he’s calling for you listen to your heart there’s nothing else you can do I don’t know where you’re going and I don’t know why listen to your heart before you tell him goodbye
sometimes you wonder if this fight is worthwhile the precious moments are all lost in the tide, yeah they’re swept away and nothing is what is seems the feeling of belonging to your dreams
listen to your heart when he’s calling for you listen to your heart there’s nothing else you can do I don’t know where you’re going and I don’t know why listen to your heart before you tell him goodbye
and there are voices that want to be heard so much to mention but you can’t find the words the scent of magic the beauty that’s been when love was wilder than the wind
listen to your heart when he’s calling for you listen to your heart there’s nothing else you can do I don’t know where you’re going and I don’t know why listen to your heart before you tell him goodbye
Listen to your heart....mm..mmm
I don’t know where you’re going and I don’t know why listen to your heart before you tell him goodbye
4 Aug 2008
lol chem test wad quite easy... nth much... today went AMKSS for YPSB... and ya i got hit my nicole... crazy girl... found out that one of the alto sax guy looks like ivan... den keep saying he play oso like ivan... den start whacking me for no reason... xiao zha bor... haha anwway nth much today... damn tired... no mood do work...
3 Aug 2008
haiz... even more bored... studying chem for tmr exam... and smsing dennis piggy didi.... lol i gave him that name cos he like me very pig oso slp so much...
yeah and while i was bathing i was thinking bout some matters... y shd i lead a life of jealousy? maybe i shd think abit more on how i feel about myself than how others feel about me... yeah this shd be it... in fact my life oso have lots of happiness wad... got my didis... kor... meis... and jie... and this somone... well as long as my life is full of events with them.... i will never regret this path of life i have chosen ^^ i dun care how others feel about me... as long as this family is always there... and as long as GOD is with me... i have nth to worry about =) so from now on... i shall stop getting emo over small matters... and well live a life of no regrets!!!
2 Aug 2008
haiz... nvm its ok... from now on im not going to blog bout things i dun like.. especially in NYJCSB... waste of my time... too much stupid ppl and stuff to tok about... well anyway today nth much happened... juz bored and nth to post...
1 Aug 2008
wah... didi really very cute... i falling in love with him xia... i mean not literaly the BGF thing lar... i mean i love him more and more as a didi k? lol dun get it rong... he seriously so caring... he ask me wad thing i scare most... i say to lose my didis... den he say he duwan lose his korkor oso... im so touched... wana cry... lol... haiz if only my other didi oso like tt... and cute didi like misunderstand me leh... he think i flirting with his junior... lol... duno he jealous or wad... he think i too close to his junior.....
31 July 2008
last day of the month... tmr is new month... and oso seven month... lol den dennis didi so cute... say he scared of you-know-what... lol den he say korkor i wan baobao... kk i baobao u lar.... didi dun scared... i will always be with you k? i baobao u and slp beside u can? dun scared lar... =) and didi ty for supporting me... think maths test sure pass de ^^ haha love u xmuakx and hor i got 20/30 for chinese xia!! first time i pass =) its a compo... and guessed who i write about? didi and korkor haha =p
30 July 2008
woah... today i super high xia... keep laughing during lessons... haha... and hor my this didi so caring de... when he hear i nev study for test tmr... den he urge me study.. say lata fail... haha... so guai... haiz.. i miss darling didi and carrot didi wor... duno how tok to them leh... abit hard... cos darling didi nev on handphone... carrot didi dun look at handphone... and my sms gona boom le... i sms my didi like so many in 1 day.. tts like the most i have ever smsed in 1 week!!! my whole month free sms juz gone like that in 1 week... cant believe xia... i wan change plan le... i wan get unlimited sms... den can spam with didi le!!! yeah!!!
29 July 2008
haiz went emo during chinese lesson... the chinese teacher said something about... ppl wun treasure things till they are lost... 世界中有会变的。。。 人当然也会跟着变。。。 所有的东西是不会再是一样了。。。 朋友们会离开我们。。。 我们也会失去东西。。。 但是决定不会变的是我们之间永恒的回忆。。。 the world is changing everyday... so will the people around us... things can never be the same again... friends will leave us... things will leave us... but what holds everything together are the wonderful memories we have... haiz... i really wana cry.... i juz cant stop thinking about you.... my minds full of you everytime... althought the times we spend are short... but there are lots of fond memories... you are the one who took care of me the most... and you are there to lend a shoulder everytime i go emo... although u may scold me... but u do that out of concern... thats y i nev get angry with you... haiz... do you know? i never regreted spending time with you... and if i have a choice to rewind the past, i would choose back the exact same path... the path we foolishly took... the path where all the happy and sad memories came... i juz wana tell you how much i love you... my love for you will never dissipate...
Prowling thru some emails and found this... its kinda old actually.... seen this last time b4...
Difference between Friends and Bestfriend and Family Members
Friend: calls your parents by mr. and mrs. Best friend: calls your parents dad & mom Family : says yo mum or yo dad!!!
Friend: has never seen you cry Best friend: has always has the best shoulder to cry on Family: hugs u and cries with you
Friend: never asks for anything to eat or drink Best friend: opens the fridge & makes himself at home Family: empties the fridge without caring
Friend: asks you to write down your number Best friend: they ask you for their number (cuz they can't remember it) Family: your number is in thier mind
Friend: borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back Best friend: has a closet full of your stuff Family: share the whole cupboard with you
Friend: only knows a few things about you Best friend: could write a biography on your life story Family: cannot start saying anything cos theres too many things to tok about they duno where to start from
Friend: will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing Best friend: will always go with you Family: tails you wherever you go
Friend: will ask where you've been Best Friend: will say ! MISS YOU & goes on being your friend Family: hugs you and say pls dun leave me again
Friend: thinks the friendship is over, when you have an argument. Best friend: knows that it’s not a friendship, until after you’ve had a fight. Family: will always fight quarrel and get back to normal again
Friend: hates it when you call, after he has gone to bed. Best friend: asks you…. why you took so long to call. Family: will keep bugging you to call/ call you whenever they think of you
Friend: gets jealous about your romantic history. Best friend: wonders of your love story….. Family: gets into your love story
Friend: expects you to be always there for any help. Best friend: is always there, wherever you require any help Family: will be there whenever u think of them
Friend: i will care for you Best friend: I treasure you Family: I love you and you are always on my mind
Friends Forever! Written with a pen Sealed with a kiss
If you are my friend, Please answer this: Are we friends or are we not? You told me once, but I forgot. So tell me now and tell me true, So I can say, I am here for you. Of all the friends I've ever met, You're the ones I won't forget. And if I die before you do, I'll go to Heaven And wait for you.Show your friends how much you care. Send this to everyone you consider a FRIEND, including the one who sent it to you. If it comes back to you, then you'll know you have a circle of friends.
u have read this mail and i believe u understand,but take a deep breath and think if u really mean this to me or i mean this to u then send it back if i do if u dont .........dont think i'll be dissappointed bcos it definately means that u mean nothing to me(refrence to my last mail'to ya all' I love all my friends and i stretch a friendship to acquintances.
cool rite? haha decided to post this... =p hope you guys enjoy it ^^
28 July 2008
hmm ytd lazy do EoM... den today nev pass up... told tcher i forget bring... which i did not lie cos i never bring... den kena scolded... so now cheonging lor... den PR2 found out i nev do... den tio kan again... lol... LL lor... anyway been smsing alot this few days... duno y leh... 1 day can hit more than 50 smses... lol dennis didi ar... i know u got unlimted sms wor... sobs korkor dun have... nvm u wait end or yr i change plan k? den i pay u spam all ur dotzzzz...... =)
27 July 2008
morning got funfair at St annes church... this yr abit nth to do... so little stores... den nev play the games liao... so no bears this yr ='( well attended sunset mass today... den i was thinking bout some stuff... hmm its like i was wondering... i keep praying for somone to love and care about me... but i juz realise hor... that person is like beside me... yet i din noe... tts probably my mum... but its abit hard for me to tok to her... cos i juz duno how communicate to her... hmm... and i always pray to be less lonely... and i juz realised how stupid i am... i got my family le.... got didis... got kor... got meis... got jie... and i still dun realise... so wad if the whole world dun care bout me? so wad if the whole world lookdown on me? y shd i feel lonely? y shd i give in to this world? i still have my family rite? so as long as i have this family behind me.. i wun fall!!! and i oso realised that many people dun realise that what they wanted have always been beside them.... its juz that they dun realise and dun treasure them...
26 July 2008
wah!! im so happy xia!! today pon YPSB sectionals only went main band... den Mr Tan went angry.... threw his swatch watch on the floor... think cost like few hundred bucks lor... den i went to VCH... cos today montfort got concert... den i was asked to help play for the flute section... so i ask Miss Ong to "pay" me with a first segeant rank.... cos that time POP somone took it mar... den today didi play solo mar... den i cant miss his first solo mar... den actually flute play counter melody... den the sec 1s duno how play.... so i like play "solo" counter melody lor... den some ppl come say wad so romantic... our practise only in morning... den the whole afternoon is free... so i help didi do the organisation stuff... let him settle the admin lor... duwan stress him so much on his first "big" task ^^ den we set at the circle seats watching the rehearsals... den i went so high... toking to cute didi... den darling didi.. den carrot didi... den dennis tan didi(duno wad name to give him yet lol)... he plays the alto sax.... lol... toking bout some lame stuff... zzz den after concert i longpang bus back to montfort... den 1 at first 1 person sit at back of bus... no one dare sit with me lol... den didi cos got no space den come sit with me de... lol... den reached montfort leh... settle everything den we went to eat dinner at Mac.... didi good lor... he was like... can u buy a macspicy buger + macflury.... how much money u got den i say shd can bah... den he say nvm lar juz the burger... i say shd can... den i took out my red notes show him... den he was like k mcspicy meal upsize + mc flurry... wth... lucky no icecream... if not i pok xia... haha nvm lar didi happy jiu can le... den went home... toking to kor... den dennis sms me ask whether tonite happy mar? lol of cos happy lar got cute didi pei me mar... =p stupid melvin the beaver u dare remind me bout montfiesta 9 i make sure u die... haha im sooo high!!!
25 July 2008
hmm today meet the parents session... din go for it... parents sugeest they tok privately with gopal... anyway its a first time a teacher say im quiet... lol mostly always say noisy... duno she crazy or wad... she oso say i abit anti social..... say starting very quiet but starting to open... lol its not im anti social lar... and i very noisy de is i starting to close up.... well its becos i feel that theres little common tpoic btw me and my classmates bah... and gopal say its becos my mind think too maturely or im much intelligent... lol... duno lar... but she say my int nev appear on my report card.... lolz... and she got a complain from peh saying i brag too much in band... well as i have already posted ytd... its cos im too open... anyway maybe im juz too mature... i duno... i juz dun seem to relate well with my guys of my age bah... and the girls are not willing to be open with me... so wad to do.... the guys only noe how tok about sports or girls... well seriously i only have interest in bowling and archery.... and im not interested in toking bout sex topics or the sick and disgusting things lar... i juz find no interest in these despo stuff.... maybe tts y ppl say im not straight cos i dun like girls... well thats not true... i dun mind toking bout girls... but i rather tok about their inner beauty den physical beauty... i rather feel it (emoitionally not physically lol) than see it... well tts mostly wad she said...
24 July 2008
well juz quarelled with some NYJC flute section ppl.... well juz to tell ppl who duno me some stuff.... im somone whos VERY i stress the word VERY open.... if i dun like something i will juz say out de.... im adopt the American style.... wadeva i dun like i jus say.... i dun like ppl who adpots SIngaporean style of backstabbing ppl... as u can see from my posts.... i juz say wadever is inside my mind... if u dun like my style juz tell me i wun bother u liao.... dun diedie keep quiet.... or i will juz continue saying things de... im not bragging or wad.... i juz wana say wadeva i feel or wadeva that is inside my heart... those ppl who are close to me will noe.... well if u guys dun like this style den i suggest u keep away from me.... im somone who dun mind ppl insulting me de... u wan insult do it infront of me juz dun do it behind me... i know got alot ppl in flute section does that.... and my class de oso.... u noe wad? i honestly dun care how others think about me... i adopt the u dun cross my line i dun cross urs... u cross myine u die.... tts my simple introduction for those who really duno the real me... or those who intend to want to know me... so that end everything... and juz to let some ppl know something... its not my fault i am iressponsible in NYJC band... tts cos i dun feel a sense of belonging here... i dun go to places im not welcome... i rather go back to montfort where at least i can enjoy my time with my juniors and my friends instead of wasting my time in NYJC.... unless u find a gd reason for me to change my point of view.... thats that and end of todays post.... if anyone still not happy i suggest u come to me directly...
23 July 2008
hmmm.... cute didi finally bothered to call me? and call me to pei me tok wor!!! haha... damn happy.... actually felt a bit emo lar... den when toking to him i oso forgot i went emo.... thkx to the stupid zhuo wen lor.... read le make me emo... anyway think i poning band on sat.... wana go montfort sec... cos they having concert on sat... so i pon church on sat go on sunday... and pon YPSB.... wana see my cutedidi first time solo mar ^^ aiya no choice my cute didi... as his kor muz give him full support... juz pon 1 band prac dia mar... scolded den scolded lor... for didi its all worthwhile de ^^ dun think i wana play with them bah... only alumni there.... very paiseh... i juz go there watch them play...
22 July 2008
I found a very nice chinese compo while searching for some ideas to write one and came across this... wonder who wrote this... its super touching lar.... make me think of somone... haiz... read liao den i gona cry....
Are you aware that im feeling very miserable for the past few weeks? There are so many things happening not sure if you know or not. Firstly its about kor, i duno what about him, he seems very busy suddenly. I Feel that his like drifting away from this family. Im not really sure what has happened but if you noticed he has hardly talked to us anymore. Spending most of his times on CCA and his friends, its impossible for him to have time with us. He seems to be keeping things to himself as well. Even if he calls, he doesnt speak much. Mostly he just talks about games, he doesnt talk much about his own life. He just doesnt want to share his problems with us. I dont know why but he is someone who likes to keep to himself. If he doesnt want to open up, there is nothing i can do. And about his condition, it seems to be little bit better.
The next concerns you. I felt that you have changed alot for the past year. And alot ever since you met Elaine. Firstly, you used to be a very caring loving and understanding person. Whenever i need to tok to someone i can depend on you. Whenever you are around me, i will never feel sad. Its a feeling i cannot explain. Im sorry about what happened few years ago. You know what im refering to right? I know that feelings cant be controlled. Im trying to change myself so please give me a chance. I really want to be a caring and loving kor for you. Please give me a chance okay? Ive tried to change myself already, im slowly letting you go.
However, these days, i find that its harder for me to talk to you. We seldom have time to spend with each other and even have some private conversation. Thats why i sent this email. I want to let you know how i feel. Didi, do you know that you are the most important person in my heart? I really can't bear to let anything happen to you. Ive been breaking down frequently. Maybe its because of stress, maybe its because i miss you too much. I been having thoughts of us parting and that me you and kor will never be together. Im really hurt by this. I hope it does not happen at all. I cant bear to part with you. Didi i just want to say that there are some things about you that really hurt me alot. I hope you will not take it to heart and that you can change after reading this. Well, sometimes you do not think of other peoples feelings before doing something. You act before thinking, sometimes causing great pain to others. Sometimes you say words that hurts others. I really hope that you would change for the better, not the worse.
As part of the family, i feel that you havent been talking about yourself too. Whenever you have problems you keep to yourself also. Its been a long time since you talked about your school stuff or your everyday stuff. I dont mind them, thats because this is part of family communication. I believe strongly that communicating and understanding is what holds bonds together. Thats why im a bit disturbed when kor and you have stopped talking about yourselves. I hope you dont mind listening to what i have to say about my life as well. I feel that communication also helps us to understand one another better. But im a bit disappointed with kor, Jamie and LingLing. They are too sensitive, its hard for me to speak my heart out to them. Sometimes because of im afraid they will have emotional breakdown, i have to keep certain things from them. That is why i felt that whenever i speak to you, i will feel a bit better. Didi, if you do have any family problems, social problems, or anything you have in your mind, please feel free to speak out. As you already know im very open, even if they are insults. If you have anything you do not like about this family, someone or even me, please say it out. I wouldnt blame you. if you have any thoughts just tell me. I want to change myself as well as as help this family. It has also been difficult to catch up with whats going on in Montfort and in band. That is why I always asked you to update me. However, i havent heard much from you as well as Darling didi. If its possible can you please update what happens frequently? Even small things like what Mr.Simen did during assembly, anything, Im willing to listen.
Its been difficult to speak to you, partly because Elaine is there. Ever since Elaine came in, theres many changes to this family. Maybe you can say im partly jealous of how you treated her. But whatever im going to say is what i feel. At first, i thought that by introducing Elaine, she can help you to change for the better. I know you want some female friends thats why I asked kor to introduce her to you. However, it seemed that you got worse. I regretted bringing Elaine to meet you. Although she is someone i can talk to when i have problems, i feel that somehow, i cant tell her everything i from my heart. Partly its because i dont trust her fully yet because i just got to know her.
Didi apart from these little blunders, i feel that you are a very good person. You are very friendly, caring and loving, and also happy-go-lucky, never failing to smile. I enjoy spending time with you and kor alot. I just hope that we can spend more time with each other, and that the 3 of us will never part. Ive been praying to God to keep this family intact and to strengthen the love we have for each other. Didi, you and kor are the reason why i felt that my 4 years spent in montfort have been worthwhile. I never regretted being part of this family. Hope you feel this way too. Im trying to plan a holiday for the three of us to go to America next year. Its after your O lev as well as mine and korkor's A lev. Hope both your parents will agree to let us go together. My parents have already agreed. Please take care of yourself okay?
Your Kor
20 July 2008
went to watch hell boy and batman with parents.... haiz... still feeling very miserable.... duno y.... den after show go home.... den duno y they suddenly start to kpkb... haiz... im already so depressed... duno y they wan make it worse...
im juz so miserable... i think im quite useless... i wana put this family back in one piece.... but i cant.... i juz cant... im trying so hard for everything to get back to the way it was last time... what a fool i am... in the end i end up being even more heartbroken.... even a simple conversation with didi... i oso have problems... what more sharing my problems with him.... he used to be very caring loving and understanding de... but his totally different now... i dun think he even cares bout me much now.... dun think im even on his mind.... kor leh.... i cant even tok to him without quarelling... i duno y but we cant see end to end with each other... in the end one have to give in... and the other dispairs... haven been able to tok to carrot didi for 1 mth le... duno wad happen bah.... everytime i sms or msn him... he juz dun reply.... den darling didi duno y nev on handphone for 1 week le.... cant call him... cant sms him.... haiz... duno wads going on.... i really nid somone beside me now.... somone i can hug and cry now.... i feel like a total moron.... somone whos drifting on passing clouds... im always alone... if anyone notices.... im always alone... in school.... in band... in lessons.... after school.... during lunch... i always eat alone.... hang out alone... i juz feel no reason to be part of this world.... haiz... i rather keep my hands out of everything... less anything more sad things happen...
the world is a much better place without me... one less person like me wun make any difference...
19 July 2008
Haiz... cried a few times in church... juz wondering wad a useless person i am... cant do anything for this family... im like such a goon.... nth i do can help... haiz.... im juz drinking my sorrows away...
18 July 2008
Haiz... im so tired... everytime i call... either ppl busy or ppl not answering... sometimes ans oso duwan tok... my heart really bursting out soon.... i really nid somone to tok to... but i just cant find.... haiz.... i juz came home from band... not happy with some ppl from my section.... say pass up excuse letter by today... den i say i go ask parents write on the spot he say cannot... wtf.... juz give him face lor.... ask me go run 1 round? no way..... and i juz found out that im still closer to some clarinatists.... i juz dun mix well with flautists... anyway.... forget everything liao lar... going to slp... tmr morn still got band...
Haiz kor... if u r reading this.... i know u got alot of problems lar... tts y i said that i wana help u.... but if u dun open ur heart.... theres nth i can do lor.... i noe theres smt troubling u therse few days... tts y wana find time to tok to u... but its either u r busy or something.... if u think study is more important than ur happiness... ive got nth to say.... theres no point in life if u r not happy.... i noe this... i feel this way too... i noe ur life is hard... but everyone have their own difficulties in life... its juz a matter of fact how u deal with it... as i have said b4... give life wadeva it gives to u... if it gives u problems... find ways to deal with it... u noe im a gentle person.... tts y i try to accomodate the problems... i juz ignore them... leave them as it is... u can do it too.... kor i noe ur heart is stronger than mine... tts y i believe that if i can do it u can do it too... maybe i din think of ur feelings n end up hearting u.... im sry... but pls come back... dun give up.... im behind u always... if u cant balance life... let me help u.... i will help set things rite.... after all... u r my kor.... pls.... let me help u k?
17 July 2008
well today had a lev listening compre... so freaking easy compared to my mid yr.... anyway went back montfort to collect graduation cert... and to find cute didi.... anyway the cert like say so many gd things... some r true some i will *ahhem* anyway juz wana say i missed spending time with didi and korkor... didi always playing games or toking to other ppl... kor akways busy with work or cca or friends... duno wad to say... i wana stop this from worsening... but wad can i do? since this family not considered as their most important things... i cant say anymore... juz cried during chinese lesson... tcher was toking bout some stuff... den i thot of something and cried... haiz.... and now looking out of the window... trying to recall bout the times me kor and didi spent tgt... haiz.... such a silly dream... it will nev come true... after so many things happen.... haiz...
15 July 2008
hmm... finally darling didi ans my call... he say got one irritating friend keep calling him... den he thot i am that person mar... so he duwan ans the phone lor... eee didi so bad... hai me worry so much.... haha nvm lar... its ok... as long as u r fine can le... juz dun do it again =) and im so emo these few days.... haven got a chance to tok to kor and didi properly... haiz... all thkx to hw..... korkor is full of hw... and pw.... haiz... den he call so late everynite... tok 5 min den he slp le.... den didi duwan tok to me... haiz... no chance to say anything at all... i shall juz keep mum.... until somone realises of my disappearence... which i think no one will =/
14 July 2008
hmm today got nth much to tok lar... juz very worried about darling didi... nev tok to him for 2 weeks le... and he nev respond to my sms... damn worried... he nev ans phone call oso... duno wad happen... haiz... didi pls be alright... i duwan lose u leh....
13 July 2008
today leh got nyjc band performance at botanic gardens.... ty for all who support =) anyway had a wonderful time with the clarinetists juz now... haha think i can tok to them better than my sect de.... anyway juz wana say that i feeling much better now... on toking terms with didi again... forgave him liao.... and he oso aplogise... aiya he my cute didi mar... cant possibly abandon him rite? my heart will pain de leh =x anyway din hear from darling didi for so many days... kinda worried... and carrot didi like daoing me leh... duno wad to do... maybe i got time go montfort collect graduation cert and find him bah... anyway plans for end of the year is actually going china... but heard that my parents wana make a detour to japan b4 coming back SG!!! omg... cant wait to go back to shopping mood!!! and they say maybe go there buy a flute back... hope they dun go back on their word.... and i think i going buy a PSP back oso haha... lalala... my mood today so high... kk i go tok to cute didi le bb
13 July 2008
Haiz... i feel so hurt... being lied by my loved ones again and again... u promised u wouldnt do that again.... how could u? u broke 3 fundamental laws... how u wan me forgive u? 1. Lying 2. Saying things and dun mean it 3. Breaking Promises Haiz... ive really got nth to say... my heart hurts till i cant speak now...
12 July 2008
hmm... finally got a call from clifford today... duno y he suddenly call for help for his blog lol... anyway... today sux terribly... cabal still got problem with my com.... or better still my com got prob with cabal... cant seem to find a solution.... maybe i will juz reformat... hmm... and cute didi in cinema... cant tok to him.... kor busy again.... haiz... no one to tok to...
11 July 2008
Im so happy... cute didi finally called me... although the reason is not wad i wanted... well but juz toking to him... seems to make me feel at ease.... i cried a few times while toking to him though... juz went totally emo.... den he consoled me a bit... felt much better.... haha thkx didi luvS euu xmuakx
10 July 2008
feeling so f uped today... cabal pai... chem got only 57%... chinese tcher called pr2.... den listen to stupid pr2 tok for so long... pissed off with him... so xtra... say duno wad sai... dun bother listening... juz let everything flow in and out it goes again.... still din get to tok to cute didi... haiz... darling didi and carrot didi oso... juz missed toking to them.... since cute didi toking to someone else.... let him lor... i dun care liao.... if he got somone else more impt than me den go ahead... i oso lanlan.... my head is juz xploding... cheonging physics tutorial... nth going into my mind... juz hack about maths turotial liao... i gona reload cabal... cant play i dulan off com le...
10 July 2008
Haiz im juz so jealous... how come ppl can lead such happy life... how come ppl get love and care by others so easily... how come ppl got friends... how come ppl have somone to depend upon... and i got none of them... haiz... i really wana be the kind of person who is always happy... but theres no one who is willing to make me happy... in school... im always alone... in class sit alone... lunch eat alone... go home go alone... at home... jamie and vale studying... lingling duno do wad.... kor busy with his own stuff... and i can see him visiting other ppl blog but nev ever bother to come to mine... my 3 didis would be the last ppl who would ever call me.. unless they nid something... haiz... and yet i see cute didi calling other ppl juz to tok... y cant he do the same to me? he can show love to another person.... and yet he is not willing to do that for me... im so jealous... y cant i lead life juz like everyone else? im sick and tired of this life... time to start afresh... time to close my eyes forget everything... and cease away... anyway i dun exist in anyones mind.... no one cares whether im there or not... i juz want to go to somewhere far away... and spend time alone... or at least with my bears... bears are the only who who understand me... and are always there when i nid somone.... truly friends 4ever =/
9 July 2008
Yeah passed econs whoooh!!! juz heard that only a few passes in the whole lev... im so happy i passed... but some pr2 say wad nev study wad sai.... damn u spoil my mood... being able to get above so many ppl is like gd enough le lar... still say wad nev study... no A not good.... juz hate contradicting parents... "oh as long as u do ur best can le" "so wad if u pass? no A no use..." "u got 10 points for o lev im so happy" "nev study... see lar only 2 A1..." juz hate pr2...
8 July 2008
So sian.... nth to do.... 1 hr break... thot wan play cabal.... cabal maintainence... wan play maple.... laptop juz system restore no maple... redownload too slow le... wan watch bleach.... buffer so slow... kns... resorted to pokemon card game... wana win elite 4 xia... haiz and i juz so wish to stay alone forever... i wana go away.... somewhere where i will be alone... and no one to disturb... im juz so tired of trying to care for everything... care about didi... and he complains... say my sms abit too much... and he even scolded me cos i duwan send elaine the sms i sent him... wads rong with that? the sms is juz meant for him to read... how can i juz send it to others to read? tts juz so absurd...and juz for elaine he scolds me for that... WADEVA i dun give a damn anymore... u wan go emo go ahead.... im gona wash my hands off everything le... i jzu kept quiet and u scold say i not toking.... elaine not toking... den u say u wan cut conversation and tok to her... wtf is this xia... u wan go with a girl den go ahead lor... u wan do anything with her go ahead.... juz dun come runnning back to me for anything u nid.... cos i wun give a damn at that time...
7 July 2008
today is youth day... no school... so ive been out ever since 11am... juz reach home at 10pm... went to watch 2 movies... incredible hulk and handcock... hulk is ok lor.... but handcock sux... almost same as jumper.... storyline so fake... and not nice... super vulgar and sick.... spent 10 bucks in arcade trying to "kiap" the white tiger.. but like no cutedidi no luck... its like so cute lor.... den went clarke quay for dinner... quite feeling for me bah... but super ex... spent $133 for whole family de dinner... not i spend de is pr2 de so nvm lor... haiz... wanted to spend today with kor and didi... but both like not free... kor rather go study with friends... and didi rather stay at home... so leaving me with nth to do... haiz... poor me... den while i was at clarke quay.... lots of memories flew past... all the memories with cute didi... that time went with him to VCH to watch whitley sec concert... den we walk to mrt via clarke quay... den oso during band camp that time oso got walk there... haiz... miss all the times i spent with him... haiz... wish kor was spending time with me today.. and im juz sick and tired of being unable to find ppl to tok to... everytime i call... no one ans my calls... everytime i wan cry no one there for me... haiz... life sux... ='(
6 July 2008
Lol feeling half dead.... last nite cant slp.... keep waking up..... maybe watch bleach watch too much... keep thinking of that hitsugaya boii... he so cute lor!!! den playing cabal while watching bleach..... haha.... dreaming of hitsugaya? lol... seriously his a very cute boii boii!!!! very cool oso.... reminds me of somone ^^ guess who?? bwahahahaha!!!
5 July 2008
Haiz... still feeling unwell.... headache... back pain... duno wad happen lar... anyway i fixed the snow prob and this blog can be viewed using IE7 le.. its becos IE7 cant read webdings fonts... so i changed it to calibri... it worked out fine ^^
4 July 2008
zzz today everything is canceled.. only got practical.... so its like oome school for practical tts all... since lata got band.. im like juz sitting in the library now doing nth... feeling so pissed... stupid laptop.... watch bleach oso lag... cant update cabal duno y... maple play til sian... audi cant even play.... got back chinese results it sux... failed... 40% only... sianz... duno y thinking of my cute didi and darling didi.... miss them alot.... life sux... haiz... anyway... im feeling very sick... tts y i pon band today... headache... and im vomiting... duno wads happening.... anyway... juz read kors blog.... so emo... haiz... kor u juz dun unds.... life is like this de... there are so many demands.... juz sieve them out.... do wad u think is most important to you.... do wad u can do.... dun do those that u cant... kiang jiu ho mai gei kiang.... try not to live a life for other ppl... life is yours to command... live a life for yourself... if u think ur path is this way... go all out for it... dun let obstacles obstruct u... i know its abit too selfish.... but u cant be selfless all the time... u have to think about urself once in a while... so wad if others are happy? are your happy? i used to say that if ppl around me are happy i will be happy... but i guess im wrong.... i noe how it feels... everytime i see my didi so happy... but i see myself always crying.... and dun give up so easily... thats the thing about u... u give up too easily... and u give in to failures... thats not wad my kor is.... if u think this family is stopping u from lots of stuff... well den do something... in life there are only 2 options.... do it or dun do it... i und how u feel... i am a emo kia myself... im a psychologist... wadeva that happened in ur life... mostly i have already felt it b4... so wad if u r ill? are u going to let illness win u? or are u going to win illness? i would already have been killed by pneumonia liao.... but y am i still around even when i kena about 3 times and went hospital on every occasion? theres nth to be afraid of... as i have always said b4... i will always be beside u.... i will always support u... afterall... u are my beloved kor.... if u have anything to tok about and cant find anyone... i will always be there.... even in the middle of the night... juz gimme a call... or i can even go to ur hse... u r NOT alone... u dun have to be alone... y do u like to bottle things to urself... im willing to share things with u.... but r u willing to share with me??? haiz... i wan my old kor back.... i wan the happy caring and loving kor back... pls... return my kor back to me....
3 July 2008
Got back 2 more subjects today... GP... 48% physics.... 28% sux... haiz... duno wad to say.... anyway im really feeling not gd.... i feel terribly lonely... even in this family... cute didi got elaine.... val and jamie... kor and lingling..... im alone... even in school oso.... i see everyone enjoying themselves... and yet me standing alone like some statue... haiz... thot i found a new friend in jc... but i cant believe that he lied to me lor... haiz.... still feeling very hurt... especially when i see him today... din tok to him at all... juz nth to say lar.... i feel that there is something missing in my life... tehres this something... i juz duno how say... but its the kinda feeling that u feel relaxed... happy and being loved... this feeling is juz totally missing from my heart... this family have really changed alot... used to be always funfilled and laughter de... but so much has changed... especially kor and didi... kor become more closed up to himself.. he doesnt even wana share his thoughts and feelings with me anymore.. didi is worse... he is no longer what he used to be... im juz so scared.... he used to be very caring and loving... very understanding.... and thoughtful... he juz changed so much in such a short time... he no longer thinks about me.... and i can no longer count on him to make me happy... his no longer the didi i always knew... i lost my source of happiness... there is no one for me to tok to anymore... less pour out my feelings... haiz... i juz wana cry... cry out for whoevers there who cares about me... crying out for whoevers there to love me and take time to understand me... i juz wish i could die... and get everything over with... afterall... no one cares...
2 July 2008
Doing pw in school for whole day... den my group suggested go macdonalds eat breakfast and do pw? lol.... so sian.... nth to do... i wana watch bleach and cabal!!! so sian... now can only msn with other ppl from other class.. but all pwing... so sian... i feel so hurt lor.... i ask my frend wad his blog... he come and lie to me... forget it.... too hurt for words....
1 July 2008
Had chinese A lev oral today... sux big time... sure fail de... hate chinese... never going to face it again!!! anyway i saw Mr Wong and requested for my maths marks... at first he say i fail den very emo... den he went back office and say he remember wrongly and i passed!!! yay!!! but not very good lar 46% nia....
29 June 2008
cheonging bleach for the last few days... been trying to find ways to stop me from emoing... but like doesnt work... cant even slp well without waking up a few times... haiz... and although me and kor patch up le.... but lately im unable to tok to him leh.... haiz.... juz wanted somone to spend more time with me... but there no one... haiz... no one....
27 June 2008
Chinese sux... sat on table F9... sure kena F9 de... anyway went to sec sch to find darling didi and carrot didi... when i gave carrot didi his drumsticks the others like so jealous lor ^^ too bad i only take care well of my didis xbleahx anyway went back to nanyang for band... sux last minute call me... spoil my plan... den duno wads with kor... not happy anyhow scold ppl... haiz... suan le... im not his scolding bag or wadeva... so i juz hung up on him... dun care him lar.... he wan stay like this i oso LL!!!
26 June 2008
=/ juz finish econs today... quite simple bah... no complains... tmr chinese... monday listening compre... tues A level oral... and im still feeling very down... i juz find no meaning lor... wonder how this family ever started anyway... when i nid somone... no one is there... when i am crying and really nid a shoulder or a hug...no ones there... while some people complain that its gay... when i need help no ones there... when i nid somone to tok to or console me... no ones there... or rather u r there.. but u either scold me for crying or leave me alone... when im scared and want somone to say "dun wry im beside u" no ones there... or rather u said scared wad sai... haiz... and when i go out with u all and u all with friends... im treated like im not there at all... when u nid somone... im am there... but no one treasures my presence... when u nid help and im there u rather somone else help u... when u got probs and i try to lend my ear... u rather keep everything to urself... when u nid somone to tok to... i waited for ur call the whole nite but no call came... haiz... ive really got nth to say.... and u rather pei somone den pei your family members... u rather read somone else's blog and from ur family members... haiz... wu hua ke suo.... i shall keep quiet... after all ive done my part in trying to keep this family tgt le... if things doesnt go rite... i shall juz sit here and watch everything crumble and fall apart...
25 June 2008
Haiz last few days duno wad happen lar... not in happy mood lor... been emoing and crying lately... haiz... duno if i shd say lar... but i relaly feel a lack of love... care and understanding... especially from my family... if u r reading this hope u understand abit... its like whenever u nid somone theres no one there for u... the feeling is so.... undesirable.... whenever u sad or happy... theres no one to share it to... and everyones keeping things from u.... Haiz.. duno y this family become like tt... just wish it could go back to last time like tt.. always happy de... nid somone somone will be there... =/...
25 June 2008
Haiz... chem test is alot of times easier than physics lar... tmr another dead paper... econs... haiz... and im so emo now...
24 June 2008
Haiz... die lar... stupid physics paper... if i get F i happy le lor... sure U grade de.... anyway tmr chem... no nid study so quite free lor...
23 June 2008
Ok lar the maths paper not as hard as A.Low de lar... haha... wun fail i think... anyway studying physics now.. and playing cabal lol...
22 June 2008
Haiz start of new school term... start of mid-yr exams... and im still playing cabal and watching tsubasa... haiz... and something caught my attention.... " There is a link to all meeeting... There is no such thing as coincidence in this world... only inevitability..." "Just like air seeping out of an inflated balloon... everytime u give somthing up, dreams and hopes start to deflate..." " Once someone is dead, no one has the power to revive them back...." Haiz... so is love... a feeling so complicated... love is a feeling that cant give up.... it is not coincidental... its always there... from the moment we met... and once given up.... can never be revived again...
20 June 2008
Well i juz got another song... its called your call... was listening to this song while blogging the previous posts... tts y i cried... listen with the lyrics and u will noe lar... this song is for a few ppl de... for cute didi.... and for this somone...
Your Call
Waiting for your call, I'm sick, call I'm angry call I'm desperate for your voice Listening to the song we used to sing In the car, do you remember Butterfly, Early Summer It's playing on repeat, Just like when we would meet Like when we would meet
Cause I was born to tell you I love you and I am torn to do what I have to, to make you mine Stay with me tonight
Stripped and polished, I am new, I am fresh I am feeling so ambitious, you and me, flesh to flesh Cause every breath that you will take when you are sitting next to me will bring life into my deepest hopes, What's your fantasy? (What's your, what's your, what's your...)
Cause I was born to tell you I love you and I am torn to do what I have to, to make you mine Stay with me tonight
And I'm tired of being all alone, and this solitary moment makes me want to come back home x4 (I know everything you wanted isn't anything you have)
Cause I was born to tell you I love you and I am torn to do what I have to, to make you mine Stay with me tonight
Cause I was born to tell you I love you and I am torn to do what I have to, to make you mine Stay with me tonight
20 June 2008
Started reading blogs again... juz realised jancice and korkor started blogging again... so has somone... and i happened to read justin's blog... this story was told to me a few times... once my Mr.Simen... and the another time by a priest in my church...
This story is familiar to many of us Montfortians, however, i'm going to tell it again :) It warms my heart evverytime i read it:
Once upon a mountaintop, three little trees stood and dreamed of what they wanted to become when they grew up. The first little tree looked at the stars and said: "I want to hold treasure. I want to be covered with gold and filled with precious stones. I will be the most beautiful treasure chest in the world!" The second little tree looked out at the small stream trickling by on its way to the ocean." I want to be traveling mighty waters and carrying powerful kings. I'll be the strongest ship in the world!" The third little tree looked down into the valley below where busy men and women worked in a busy town." I don't want to leave the mountain top at all. I want to grow so tall that when people look at me, they'll raise their eyes to heaven and think of God. I will be the tallest tree in the world." Years passed. The rains came, the sun shone and the three little trees grew tall. One day three woodcutters climbed the mountain. The first woodcutter looked at the first tree and said," This tree is beautiful. It is perfect for me." With a swoop of his shining axe, the first tree fell." Now I shall be made into a beautiful chest, I shall hold wonderful treasure!" the first tree said. The second woodcutter looked at the second tree and said this tree is strong, it is perfect for me." With a swoop of his shining axe the second tree fell. Now I shall sail mighty waters," thought the second tree "I shall be a strong ship for mighty kings!" The third tree felt her heart sink when the last woodcutter looked her way. She stood straight and tall and pointed bravely to heaven. But the woodcutter never even looked up. "Any kind of tree will do for me," he uttered. With a swoop of his shining axe the third tree fell. The first tree rejoiced when the woodcutter brought her to a carpenter's shop, but the carpenter fashioned her into a feed box for animals. The once beautiful tree was not covered with gold nor with treasure. She was coated in sawdust and filled with hay for hungry farm animals. The second tree smiled when the woodcutter took her to a shipyard, but no mighty sailing ship was made that day. Instead the once strong tree as hammered and sawed into a simple fishing boat. She was too small and too weak to sail to an ocean, or even a river, instead she was taken to a little lake. The third tree was confused when the woodcutter cut her into strong beams and left her in a lumberyard. "What happened?" the once tall tree wondered. "All I ever wanted was to stay on the mountain top and point to God." Many days and nights passed. The three trees nearly forgot their dreams. But one night golden starlight poured over the first tree as a woman placed her newborn baby in the feed box. "I wish I could make a cradle for him," her husband whispered. The mother squeezed his hand and smiled as the starlight shone on the smooth and sturdy wood. "This manger is beautiful," she said. And suddenly the first tree knew that he was holding the greatest treasure in the world. One evening, a tired traveler and his friends crowded into the old fishing boat. The traveler fell asleep as the second tree sailed quietly out into the lake. Soon a thundering and thrashing storm arose. The little tree shuddered, she knew she didn't have the strength to carry so many passengers safely through the wind and the rain. The tired man awakened. He stood up, stretched out his hand and said "Peace". The storm stopped as quickly as it had begun. And suddenly the second tree knew that she was carrying the King of heaven and earth. One Friday morning, the third tree was startled when her beams were yanked from the forgotten woodpile. She flinched as she was carried through an angry jeering crowd. She shuddered when soldiers nailed a man's hands to her. She felt ugly harsh and cruel. But, on Sunday morning, when the sun rose and the earth trembled with joy beneath her, the third tree knew that God's love had changed everything. It had made the third tree strong. And every time people thought of the third tree, they would think of God. That was better than being the tallest tree in the world.
Dear ppl, So the next time you feel down because you didn't get what you want, just sit tight and be happy because God is thinking of something better to give you.
There are a few things i'm thankful for during the moments of my life:
* God loves me * For the people who love me * For the people I love * My life, the way God created me for, and the dreams He gave to me. * For even the slightest bit of love showed by the people around me * For never looking down at even the smallest thing * For giving me a chance to know cute didi darling didi carrot didi korkor meis jie and dar * For allowing me and this special somone to be able to care and love for each other although its only for a short period of time * For giving me my best friend clifford who make me realise that im not that lonely throughout my montfort life * For giving me a caring loving and understanding cute didi * For giving me darling didi who is ever loving and supporting me * For giving me carrot didi who is always there for me whenever i have troubles * For giving me kor whom i can always count on * For giving me meis and jie who are always trying to make me happy * For giving me dar who is willing to share love with me * And lastly for who I am
=/ duno lar im juz feeling very touched by this story... duno leh sobbing again...
20 June 2008
Today ne went for moontree cabal guild outing... haha some ppl got a big shock when they noe darrkarrow is me a guy =p and den we went to whitesands eat lunch.... deidre playing with her food den nev eat... wasted lol... aceyu and monkey guo er ren shi jie.... duno run go where... den both pangseh us go lan play cabal... idiot no life xia... guild outing den run off.... deidre is so pissed.... cos ace her bro mar... den we went pasir ris park... went cycling half hour... paid 5 bucks for 2 hrs and wasted 1hr30min... den we wait deidre finish hw... den went downtown east eat... nth much lar... now cheonging sword to a.expert ^^
20 June 2008
anyway juz thot that i must finish blogging everything since the japan trip... if not like that accumulate will die de... nth much lar juz cabaling and cabaling.. no life xia... shd be mapling but kena drag to cabal by kor den addicted le... now lev 60 holding aqua crtsal and master skill rank le!!! went back montfort twice... once for band... wana pass carrot didi his drum stick i bought for him in japan... but he never go band... 2nd time go korkor campfire... terrible mistake... i can stand tehre 1hr 30min no one come ask me go sit de... i dun even noe my sit where leh.... until a.low drag me to the vip sit.... den started raining so campfire call off earlier... 2 more days to sch reopen leh how ar?? nev study for exam leh... duno if can adapt to sch life again!!! howhowhow??
12 June 2008
7am woke up.... cheong home.... wan play cabal... den b4 i left ying fu say wad pleasure to slp with u lol!!! zzz so lame....
11 June 2008
morning leh all cant wake up... so i cheong alone go mac eat breakfast... tried the new burger macgridles or wadeva... ok lar but i still prfer macmuffin with eggs... den go find my 4E1 class... haha den wait till all wake up den went escape... 3rd time into escape.... set alot of rides last time all under maintainence... duno y flipper always closed... cheong go kart.. 1st timer and kena 1st lol... so happy!!! 2nd time oso first lol!!! bbq time!!! ate 3 rounds of food lol.... den we went pool and arcade.... till about 12pm den kena chase out cos they close le... cant believe it got last for datona everytime i play the last few days... finally tap got internet... so cheong bm2 quest til tired... den fell aslp beside ying fu....
10 June 2008
Last few days cheoning cabal lar haha so nev blog... today clas chalet at pasir ris... suppose to meet at 4pm... den we wait till like 5pm for everyone to turn up... this class got a damn bad habit i dun like... always late for meetings de.. den unpack stuff till 7+ den go eat dinner... went arcade til 9 + cos bowling no lane muz wait... played till 11+ den they say wan watch movie... den watch ghost movie.... den some of them put earpiece blast mp3zzz might as well dun watch... waste money... but nvm lar since pei class den ok lor... at least they got pei us ^^ den go back cant slp.. all cheong mahjong and cards.... den some bastard took my slping area from me so i cant slp le...
7 June 2008
Home sweet home!!! so happy to get back... really missed my family... espicially cute didi darling didi carrot didi and kor!!
6 June 2008
wow!! today so cool never rain!!! heng ar if not universal studio dunnit go le.... took a train there... nth much... london underground is worse.. juz abit confusing cos a few trains land in same platform so muz read the signboard for destination... unversal studios same as california de... so i juz took to thrill rides lor... took the hollywood dream for 5 times... cos can listen to 5 diff types of music.. den sit till i slp... since im alone again... as usual... i went for single riders lor so can jump queue... less than 10 min ur turn le... bought some souvernirs thingy lar... nth much to buy anyway... wanted to take lunch at 4pm.. but all restraunts are closed... damned sad... hungweeeees!!! den almost 6 le so i took the train back to hotel...alone... den i bought myself a train ticket and walked from station to symphony hall... so cool japan no.2 band performing... for juz 20 US$ can watch le!! osaks municiple symphonic band... almost fell aslp.. which i always do during concerts unless i like the songs alot.. den nth much le... went tower records for last minute shopping... bought 2 cds den koon le...
5 June 2008
Wow today is a damn fun and happy day lor!!! firstly went to nippon bashi looking for anime stuff!!! found 2 shops at last minute but couldnt buy cos no time le!!! damn disappointed!!! duno who wan go back shisaibashi 3rd time de lor!!! i walk alone from shinsaibashi back to nippon bashi with a map bah lol!! walk in the rain... wei le cute didi and darling didi den nvm lor.... suan le lar they happy can le... they happy = i happy... cos they want dgray man stuff mar... so buy help them buy lor... den end up sick... bought at least more than 100$ worth of anime goods... got tsubasa dgrayman deathnote naruto finalfantasy... but i missed out my sasuke!!! damned!!! i so luvS sasuke!!! Swap card alot times hor today??? lunch at yoshinoya... duno wad to order.... so anyhow point... kena beef bowl... cos got the chinese word niu there... its like $3 and free drinks... and the small size = sg biggest size leh!!! went to band exchange at majo gakuen or wadeva u spell it... they super high keep screaming and laughing lor!!! den at night reach hotel muz make police report... sit on chair for 30mins for "interrogation" very scared xia.. like gona get tortured or something lol... den went for dinner alone to eat katsu don... damn nice leh!!! japan food seriously alot, cheap and OOISHI!!! since tmr last nite, decided go jackpot.... put 1k note into coin change, got 50 coins... look so kiasu duno how play... still need the person teach me... anyway got take some pics of me playing haha... starting lose very cham.. den change seat... change fengshui.... lose even more... till kena 777... but not same color so is big bonus.... 99.9% chance of kena win.... and only nid put 2 coins instead of 3.... every win = 15 coins.... so from start to end of bonus... i got 400+ coins.... den after bonus and cos shop closing... so i pack up and zao.... won 6k yen... minus 200 yen for surcharge.... got about 80 + sing dollar leh!!! so cool!!! first time play den win so much le haha!!! beginners luckz zz den last nite dreamt of clifford leh duno y.... maybe miss my best friend too much.. nev see him since take o lev results leh...
4 June 2008
Sians half... woke up at 1230am... xueli staring at me... i stare back... wondering how she appear in my room de... fell aslp while watching tv and waiting for liangyun they all to return mar.... cos liangyun and shaoming duno go which room... den nev take key.. edn if i slp they dunnit come in le.. woke up later at 730... bathe and stuff like tt till 830.... den alonee go walkwalk shops... all shops close.... only open at 11am... den wads the point of giving us free time to shop when no shops open??? anyway went to eat breakfast b4 go shop again.... saw a studio ghibli shop... lots of cute stuff but very ex... went pass a shopping mall... den got one shop full of bears de... got 2 levels sommore... cheong in and crazy xia.... bought alot of them!!! den went tower records next door.... bought a deathnote soundtrack... den din noe lunch is own arrangement de so nev eat.... starve till dinner lor.... went osaka college of music... they suer pro lor.... got 1 cha bor flute powell platinum de cost more than US$20k!!! wth super rich xia her!!! anyway back in the hotel preparing to slp le haha Miss eeuS baDly!!!
3 June 2008
Went to visit some dumb temples again... So boring xia... today no camera so use hp take pics lor... lunch was buffet.... quite nice and filling leh haha^^ went to walk along gion area... saw some geishas xia!!! the manga museum sux.... thot got alot cool stuff... in the end full of crap... only brought back some souvenirs from the gachapon machine.... dinner was chinese restraunt!!! omg so miss chinese food leh!!! went back to shinsaibashi shoppping for second time le.... bought some clothes for dar and meis... haha now tio pangseh in the room alone.. shaoming and li8angyun go room visiting... i alone writing blog lor... wished got bring laptop lar got internet xia!!! miss eeu all very badly lor!!! anyway got speak to kor lar... he accidentally ans my call lol.... japan things so ex!!! today is 3rd day only like going no money le!!!
2 June 2008
Went to osaka castle. given 2 hrs to walk and see exhibits but we like spend 1.5 hrs taking pictures and 30 min exhibits lol... everyone were so paedophilic!!! rushing like mad to take pics with the Jap kiddys!!! the jap kids i think primary school or pre school... they on excursion lol... after that was worse... went to shinsaibashi shopping district... one long stretch of road lasting like 1km? think spend lots of money today... more than 50 bucks haha!!! ate mac for lunch... wanted to try the mac here... although exer than Sg de... but meat here very nice!! and they got prawn burger sommore!!! Went yohigaoka high school for band exchange... their thrombone sect rox xia!!! played disney songs, den we play march blue sky tgt..... took many pics with them... den when go back hotel, found out camera lost... so sad all the pics gone... dinner was another type of steamboat but i feel even hungrier after eating xia... den at hotel kena pangseh by liangyun... he folo liying they all and Mr Tan go buy CD at tower records... den hai me and shaoming wait 1 hr for him cos he got the key.. he lazy put at key drop... WTH!!!
1 June 2008
Fell aslp after the first movie on plane... watching with half an eye only...w aiting for show to end... Even touch down on japan oso zombiefied de.... then forget take poker cards from SQ.... Sianz... took lots of pictures at the Nara temple.... nothing much actually until night time... juz plain walking... after dinner at steamboat, the fun starts!!! Eunice Xueli Liying and I went for night walk... Walking through back alleys were freaky but funn xia!! Even had the chance to go jackpot... actually thought it was arcade and want see japan arcade like wad... den realised it was jackpot!!! although we were all underaged, it was so exciting to try overaged stuff haha!!! Eunice put a 1k yen note into changer... den she say waste money... wan change back.... but only got back 800 yen, 200 for surcharge den walkwalk alot... bought alot of things... at night most shops are closed so sad....
31 May 2008
Well im rewriting the last few days stuff bah in paper and ink no laptop to bring there... parents dun allow... Haha im so happy!!! today flying to japan!! long awaited flight... wanted to go there so badly since young... and my first time flying on terminal 3 too!!! so happy... went church at 6... den ate dinner at airport.... Food sux leh.... so salty... anyway im gona miSS euuS badly w0R!! cu73didi, k0R, daRLing didi, m3is, daR and s0meone... been thinking bout this somone very long le.. hope that somone noes.... byeS and TC!!!
30 May 2008
Haiz... juz woke up... not in a gd mood... play maple until dulan... den go rakion own ppl.... den sian... haiz... wished i could spend more time with didi and kor.. haiz... kor rmb ur promises u made to me and didi hor... u say wana go America with us end of next yr de hor.. and when we older we buy house side by side de leh.. dun forget all these... live to ur promises ^^ haiz... how i wished the 3 of us could spend time tgt like last yr.. its juz 1yr ago... and things have changed so much... so many complications and interference... haiz... if only jie were here... she would have known wad to do.... how i wished this family was like last time... only me u didi jie mei and dar.... =/ i really wished nothing has ever changed... i really wish u were the same happy person as always... and didi being the very guai and loving person.... haiz... wished u 2 had never changed....=/
29 May 2008
Yay another few hours and im going out with cute didi and darling didi le !!! haha... anyway i juz realised certain things... hugs are one of the most powerful actions... one hug works many miracles.... it can totally make somone happy even though they are really emo... haiz... how i wish that hug will come.... no ones willing to make the first step... o well....
Hmm today was quite eventful... went out with cutedidi and darling didi today... watched Narnia.... den went to Plaza Singapura to buy earpiece for cutedidi... well my mood was very happy den... until the bus ride... i duno y keep crying throughout the whole ride... kept thinking of kor.... haiz...
28 May 2008
Haiz... well im having moodswings for the past few days... suddenly happy suddenly sad suddenly very high.... haiz... duno y lar... juz had this ever since kor say he wana leave this family... haiz... and i juz learnt another lesson today... u cant always count on others to make u happy... only u can make urself happy... and how to do that? by juz getting emo... tok to urself... tok to ur bears... juz do that... cry all your heart all... den take a shower... den go slp... when u wake up everything will be gone... haiz... how i wish i will nev wake up....
27 May 2008
today leh oso very happy... went didi hse again lolz... was doing zk quest 2... the jumping thingy... its the first time i do jump quest... and i passed!!! thkxs to didi who helped me a bit and his guidance lol... soooo happy!!! i saw him so determined to finish that dumb quest... so i decided to try oso... den i duno anyhow jump den complete stage 1... stage 2 did until 2 third.... den left very little pots.. so i ask didi help me... cos lata no pots wan go out muz rejump everything!!! so its like we took a SS at the end to show that both kor and didi finish zk quest!!! maybe got time den do quest 3 bah cos seeing how i failed so many class and lecture tests... think still nid to read abit for midyr luvS euu cut3didi!!! xmuakSSx
26 May 2008
Lol today tok to didi on phone til 1 am... haiz... i juz realised didi like got split personality leh... sometimes he very guai caring lovind and understanding... sometimes he very hurting... when i with him hor.. sometimes very happy sometimes very sad de... den today went to his house... duno lar juz miss him lor... very long nev go his hse le... den we 2 person do orbis pq till lev... den go do zakum pq.... quest 1 so easy 2 person slowly do.. not enough time den smuggle out lor... lol... cheat... xbleahx =p LuvS euu cut3didi!!! XmuakSSX
23 May 2008
GP exam was kinda freaky... its quite manageable lar not much diff from my o's haiz... anyway... really no mood now lar... haiz lots of things happening.. and they r not gd stuff....
22 May 2008
tmr got gp exam... duno leh i like no feeling de... diaoz... and i got my 1st ATM and credit card today!!! juz for the Japan trip lolz!!! haiz... and some ppl lor... say he will forget everything.... but his actions doesnt say so.... haiz... forget it bah... juz treat it as we weret toking tt day...
20 May 2008
haha i now sibei happy... didi juz forgave me for all the things i done to him.... and we juz started afresh again haha!!
19 May 2008
lolz today watched iron man again!!! didi lor... say wan watch... so pei him lor... nan de ji hui leh... haha... really missed my whole family... i wonder wad will happen if i go japan xia... sure emo de lor... anyway juz wana let my family noe that u guys rox!!! and i really love u!!! thkx for all the happy wonderful memories!!! and lets make a vow that we will always be tgt k?
18 May 2008
Well i was watching tsubasa chronicles the whole night.. loved it so much xia... wish i could watch with that someone... haiz... anyway i learned something in the first few episodes of the show... no matter how weak people are, they each serve a purpose in our live... look on the gd side of everyone and not the bad side!!!
18 May 2008
Happy birthday mummy!! haha today went to watch iron man with my family... den we went some funny jap restraunt for dinner... its omg ex... $263 for 4 ppl... anyway the portion like quite small for that price lor... haha nvm jiu jiu yi ci... i will posts the pics soon bah...
16 May 2008
Yeh today so happy... met didi after so long... miss him alot... den we both went to find elaine meimei... haha... too bad kor cant meet us...
15 May 2008
lol saw elaine meimei the first time today... she reminds me of somone from my og.... lalala... nth much...
14 May 2008
lol today band quite fun... sectionals leh... equal to section bonding?? lol toking about wad to bring for japan trip... and we had some jap lessons at the end haha... so cool.... and i nev knew my section mates did visit my blog... juz knew when they asked me something during band juz now... haha... looking forward to the trip wor!!!
13 May 2008
Haiz.. its been such a long time since this feeling... the feeling of missing ppl... miss 3 ppl quite alot.. couldnt slp last nite... haiz... and today go sch whole day emo...
10 May 2008
Wow finally the concert!! well it Auereus Experentia was quite a success!!! ty for all who went... and ty to my darling didi who went to support me =)
7 May 2008
Haiz.. all i juz wan is a few little happy memories for the last of my days... y isit so hard to get?? haiz... if u r reading this... rmb wad i said on 23 Feb 2008.. its totally pointless... everytime somone doesnt give in to the other... another quarrel appears... its like non-stop... i mean like wad good isit to the both of us... its becos i care tts y i went to find u today... no matter how sick am i, my family comes first... i juz wana meet u awhile... dun u even have a little time to spare mar? it took me so much difficulty juz to go find u... and there u r scolding me not to come if i not happy... cant u be a little more caring and show some concern? i noe u r with ur friends... tts y i took the initiative to find u... instead asking u to find me... even when u found out im sick... u dun even show a slightest concern... i noe u may have many probs of ur own... but who doesnt have probs? is asking whether im fine take u more than few seconds of ur time? dun get me wrong... im not always finding fault with u.... i really wanted to apologise to u in the train juz now... but ur sms have really hurt me... if u really cant stand me... den tell me directly... dun send somone an sms and forward it to me... if u wan... i can always disappear... as i have said on 23 Feb 2008.. if u wan i can disappear from ur life totally... and i wun bother u again... afterall... i have always been alone for 16 yrs... it doesnt make anymore diff...
2 May 2008
Haiz... my concert leh... abit failure... no one support de... onli my 3 didis... and this special somone... but cute didi got church... carrot didi wan go but parents dun allow... onli yisheng didi can go... sobs... then someone cant take leave cant go... haiz... suan le lar... no use getting disappointed... at least got one go can le =)
1 May 2008
Haiz... supposedly a day of happy family outing... din go to pw juz for u guys.... den lata all duwan go.... haiz... i got nth to say le... its ok if u duwan go... i juz get upset for a while and make do with it... but pls dun force urself to go out with me... i dun like to force ppl... it wun do any gd... if u r reluctant to go out... dun go... theres no meaning in gg out... its ok... i can always go out alone.... its wad ive been doing all these 16 yrs.. gg out alone... used to it.... so its ok...
30 April 2008
I relaly feel very helpless now... i really got nth to keep me motvated now... nth to keep me happy about.. haiz...
29 April 2008
I remember asking somone... "y do u help ppl even if they hurt u?" now i unds... when we help ppl... we dun care whether ppl appreciates it or not... as long as we make a difference in somones life its all that it matters... if somone is happy we will be happy... so here goes my motto "Live to make a difference in someonelse's life" i dun mind sacrificing everything... all i wan to do very badly is to love and care for my loved ones.... no matter whether they appreciate it or not... as long as it makes a difference in thier life, all that is done are worthwhile
26 April 2008
Today went to montfort founders day... haha saw my didis in sch so happy!!! anyway after taking the $50 voucher, i went out iwht my class go pizza hut eat.... den play cards at amk hub till 5pm lol...
25 April 2008
haiz... feel like quiting band... i feel so left out everytime lor... i dun unds how come ppl who juz join can mix around so well and yet i who start since PAE cant? haiz... not only that... theres alot of things that happen these few days... feel like im a jinx or smt... always got bad things happening to me de... this sux... nvm... since ppl complain... i shall juz emo alone and dun tok to anyone....
24 April 2008
Damn it. Wads rong with you? y do u have so much prob de? u seriously turning from a pr2 into a foreigner. wads rong with laughing to destress? U wan me cut to destress then u say i antisocial. I laugh u say i wasting time on phone. Wtf is ur prob.
23 April 2008
Haiz... feel like hugging somone and cry... but theres no one there for me... haiz... wad to do.... theres nth i can do... juz hug my bears and cry ='( i really need somone i can tok to... somone who wouldnt mind me expressing my feelings... i seriously cant get sad now cos kor and dar will get sad... i wan cry they will oso dun like it.. is there somone else whom i can tok to? somone who is willing to lend me a hug to cry? somone who will let me cry my heart out b4 pacifying me? haiz....
22 April 2008
haiz... first time i failed my 2.4km run.... nvm its juz a trial run.... still got 1 more week to the real thing!!! jyjyjy!!!
19 April 2008
Haiz... well u noe there are many ppl ur gona meet in life... and these people can be categorised....
~People Who love You >Family ~>Gideon Cute didi ~>YiSheng didi ~>Jonathan Carrot Didi ~>Dardar ~>Daron panda Korkor ~>Jolin jiejie ~>Ling Ling meimei ~>Valerie Meimei
>Friends ~>Somone ~>Clifford
~People Who Don't >Classmates >People who hang around with you
well for some reasons i cant say who the somone is although it always reappear in this blog... the person shd noe who he/she is... and well... as u noe the friends list is like how many ppl... now u noe y im always so lonely ^^
18 April 2008
How i wish i have a better biological family... mine totally suck.... although we dun face financial issue.... and we dun normally fight like some family do.... but i dun feel a tinge of happiness here... instead of supporting you which wad families shd do... they are always against wadever u do... they say they give freedom... but wad is freedom if they stop u from choosing the way to destress... wad is freedom if they choose for u wadeva options u have? i wan to do bio but i kena force into physics... i wan go poly but kena force into JC... i wan destress by talking and other stuff.... but all u know is to force me to go into sports... wad works for u may not work for others!!! pls get this into your thick skull!!! u once said god gave u 2 children to help u control u temper... since u know tt, but instead of learning to control ur temper u still let it flare everytime... and wads wrong with me slping? ppl tired cannot ar? i dun see parents screaming at thier children to wake up? i dun see parents stoping thier children from toking? i thot parents live longer and shd be more expereinced.... but from wad i see i think i am wrong... instead of thinking before doing smt.... i see that u all act on first instinct!!! and u guys like to change things according to situation! at one time u can say i study very hard for o lev to explain the good grades... but before o lev u complain i nev study! wad an irony!!! u tell me after o lev u wun restrict me with phone calls... but now wad happens? i call a while u kpkb!!! and dun compare with me from the past! humans can live for so long because they are adaptable! if i put u in a place where u got no friends wad will u do? will u search for new friends? or dun do anything at all? wads wrong with socialising with my juniors? is there smt wrong? wads wrong with socialising with ppl who are not as intelligent? din Jesus socialise with the sinners too? y do u like to do things tt only to ur advantage? y cant u think of helping ppl who are not as gd as u? and let me remind u one more time.... i am not something for u to venge u f***ing anger on! u wana noe y i nev tell u anything from within my heart? its becos i noe things will become worse... do u noe y that i dun wan material stuff? i wan a real family love not juz monetary rewords and stuff.... tts y i look for another family... a family who can really show me support.... and let me tell u... i choose to keep quiet not becos i feel guilty... its becos theres no point arguing with ppl who always think they are right...
16 April 2008
f***ing sh1t @ssh0le!!! u call this trust ar? dun beleve wad i say still call trust? wtf is this? u complain i keep wasting my time on phone... u complain i spend time on com... u complain i mistreating pr... complain so much... wtf ur prob? do u noe i hate ur f***ing attitude? have u ever thot y i do all this? have u ever know that im always alone everywhere i go? do u noe phone is the only communications i have with my family? do u noe pr is already pri5? when i was pri 5 i wasnt like such an @ss!!! u wan protect him i dun give a d@mn if u wan him to be still such as @ss go ahead lor i dun f***ing care... wad he becomes is your prob.... and let me tell u this.... u have always been a PR2....
13 April 2008
well nth much has changed... juz tt i got my new desktop... specs is... 22inch lcd widescreen monitor 2.66Ghz core 2 quad intel processor geforce 8500 video card 300gb HDD hardisk haha the screen now super big... can watch movie very shiok now =) and life muz still go on... whether or not life goes well for us... we muz still walk on the same path... so y not make life happy and enjoy =) always look on the bright side of life haha.... and yet another person complain about my emo blog lol!!!
12 April 2008
Haiz... 2 weeks of depression... gona explode soon... first jie gone... den kor sick... den dar angry... den didi oso nev bother to call... haiz... den no one tok to.... haiz... lucky still got yisheng didi pei me... if not i would have gone emo again... =/
10 April 2008
Haiz... feeling a sense of helplessness again... y do i always feel the tinge of lonliness in sch? and y is my onli source of joy comes from my didi now? where are my other sources of happiness?? haiz... =/ always fail to make ppl happy... always make them sad instead =/ and i recieved this email its titled
THE BRICK
A young and successful executive was traveling down a neighborhood street, going a bit too fast in his new Jaguar He was watching for kids darting out from between parked cars and slowed down when he thought he saw something As his car passed, no children appeared. Instead, a brick smashed into the Jag's side door! He slammed on the brakes and backed the Jag back to the spot where the brick had been thrown The angry driver then jumped out of the car, grabbed the nearest kid and pushed him up against a parked car shouting, 'What was that all about and who are you? Just what the heck are you doing? That's a new car and that brick you threw is going to cost a lot of money. Why did you do it?' The young boy was apologetic.
'Please, mister...please, I'm sorry but I didn't know what else to do,' He pleaded. 'I threw the brick because no one else would stop.....' With tears dripping down his face and off his chin, the youth pointed to a spot just around a parked car. 'It's my brother, 'he said 'He rolled off the curb and fell out of his wheelchair and I can't lift him up.'
Now sobbing, the boy asked the stunned executive, 'Would you please help me get him back into his wheelchair? He's hurt and he's too heavy for me.'
Moved beyond words, the driver tried to swallow the rapidly swelling lump in his throat. He hurriedly lifted the handicapped boy back into the wheelchair, then took out a linen handkerchief and dabbed at the fresh scrapes and cuts. A quick look told him everything was going to be okay.
'Thank you and may God bless you,' the grateful child told the stranger. Too shook up for words, the man simply watched the boy! push his wheelchair-bound brother down the sidewalk toward their home.
It was a long, slow walk back to the Jaguar. The damage was very noticeable, but the driver never bothered to repair the dented side door. He kept the dent there to remind him of this message: 'Don't go through life so fast that someone has to throw a brick at you to get your attention!' God whispers in our souls and speaks to our hearts. Sometimes when we don't have time to listen, He has to throw a brick at us. It's our choice to listen or not.
Thought for the Day: If God had a refrigerator, your picture would be on it. If He had a wallet, your photo would be in it. He sends you flowers every spring. He sends you a sunrise every morning Face it, friend - He is crazy about you! Send this to every 'beautiful person' you wish to bless. God didn't promise days without pain, laughter without sorrow,sun without rain, but He did promise strength for the day, comfort for the tears, and light for the way. Read this line very slowly and let it sink in.... If God brings you to it, He will bring you through it.
9 April 2008
Well todays dads bdae... nth much... went to eat dinner out onli...
8 April 2008
Argh!!! u noe wad? todays the unlucky day for me... sch today half day so thot can cabal... den cabal under maintenance... so back to montfort find didi... and didi kena scolded by tt stupid VP.... den go home... my desktop nev come again... den now got stupid physics duno how do... wth... hate this... and hate tmr got band!!! and now jies going off again!!! argh!!!!!
6 April 2008
='( haiz... last nite cant slp... slp halfway.... den got nightmare... dreamt of got some war thingy... den me and yisheng didi together... den i dreamt i lost him or smt... den i wake up and crying... den dun dare slp le... haiz... i duwan lose my didi ='(
5 April 2008
sianz... today nth to do... stay at home do PW.... i was reading on doctor william tan when i came across smt that hit my mind... Last year in montfort, mr simen used Muhammad Ali to sort of inspire us... and now i found this in one of the websites... The boxing legend, Muhammad Ali, once said: “Champions aren't made in gyms. Champions are made from something they have deep inside them - a desire, a dream, a vision. They have to have the skill and the will. But the will must be stronger than the skill.” Those of us who hate going to the gym can take heart. While we may not be able to “float like a butterfly” or “sting like a bee”, we can still be champions in our own way. We can all push our limits and strive for excellence in whatever we do.
using dreams and passion to push ourseleves all the way? well quite true... haha... anyway no more random stuff lol...
3 Apr 2008
Well today was quite a boring day at sch... accept for toking about games and anime in class lol... anyway im think im gona do journeys for my project work... I think im gona do on the life on Dr William Tan... he came to Montfort last yr to give a talk to us before our o lev... and i think his the right man for the project... besides i got the resources... his book... and i noe how to find him^^ so can interview him ^^ haha so wad if alot of ppl doing about him? i got confidence that mine will be more outstanding than the usual determination and perseverance... and im not gona say out in case some ppl kapo my ideas =p and i seriuosly nid to find new sources of joy... the old sources of joy cant be counted on anymore... haiz... everyones so busy with their own stuff.... kor busy with his wadeva stupid work... and didi busy with duno wadeva stuff.... argh!!! life sux!!! seriously nid find somone to pei me soon... or i think im gona die of unjoyfullness.... wonder y its so hard to find somone to pei... its like everyone can find somone and yet i cant... isit because of my character? my personality? or my looks? haiz... forget it... i shd juz stick to bears.... bears seem to listen more... haiz... it takes me so hard to get back to my happy self... and now i start thinking of "seeking happiness" from cutting again... argh!!! there muz be smt i can do!!! haiz... if onli the special somone is there... ='(
1 Apr 2008
Look behind u got a lizard!!! lol april fools day =) anyway... u noe wad? i was looking at the main differences between males and females in my class... Males always click together... if male click to one female... the whole class will say they dating... if male click to a group of females... everyone say he flirting... the same goes to females.... males want to look nice to let other ppl admire... females wana look nice for themselves to admire... females like to tok alot... but when a male tok alot... they complain he very noisy... females like to gossip... when males gossip... they say he gossiper... males like to tok about chio bu and compare size... and girls tok about shuai ge compare looks... girls always stick together wherevr they go... males eiether go in groups of few ppl or walk alone... girls tok and walk but they are like tortoise... guys tok and walk... but they walk like cheetahs... but overall... the whole class like to be late for lessons lol... juz random stuff lol...
31 Mar 2008
I was watching Evans Almighty... well... the show kinda nice... makes me rethink about GOD... and now i understand wad HE means by "ask and u will recieve, Seek and u will find, Knock and it Will be open unto you" If u ask GOD for something...He doesnt give it to you directly... He gives u opportunities to get it well... its kinda true... So i think that by asking GOD to give me more time with my family... he will give me opportunities to gain more time??? If i ask for a more loving family, he will five me challenges to build a more loving family? Well... i was thinking about it throughout the show... and i think it kinda make sense.... maybe i do need to understand GOD more... and wad he wans for me to do? and kor... if u r reading this... pls noe that there is a reason for this family to meet... its not pure coincidence... there is a reason for us to meet... wads the reason? well im still not sure yet... but we will find out wun we? =)
30 Mar 2008
I keep asking myself.... why isit that ppl always hang out with their friends... why isit that ppl always have friends to be with... and yet... wherever i go... im always alone?? haiz... now i understand why... Im have very little friends.... so that i can treasure all those bonds with my current friends and my loved ones.... so wad if other ppl got so many friends? yet they dun treasure one another?? isnt it better to have one good friends than 10 ppl u noe beside u? And with this, i will never forget the people who are always beside me, caring and loving me... the current song in my blog is for all my loved ones... who never fail to go the extra mile for me... be it juz keeping me company... or always beside me when i need somone... To my loved ones, YiSheng and carrot didi, Daron kor, Valerie and Ling Ling meimei, Jolin jie, my mum, who are always there when i need somone beside me To Gideon didi and Darling Jamie who gave me strength to pick myself up whenever i feel like giving up... To my friends, Clifford who is beside me during the troubling period in montfort... and to Janice who lent a shoulder when i need somone to tok to... And lastly... to this special somone... who is always there in my heart... Pls noe that i appreciate wad u all do for me... and i will nev forget u guys =) I love you guys always!! and if u nid me i will always be there for u 24/7 =)
Mother Theresa once said " People are often unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered; Forgive them anyway. If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives; Be kind anyway. If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies; Succeed anyway. If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you; Be honest and frank anyway. What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight; Build anyway. If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous; Be happy anyway. The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow; Do good anyway. Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough; Give the world the best you've got anyway. You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and God; It was never between you and them anyway." wadeva we do, we should remember that we do it willingly not for other ppl... so we shd care onli wad we think about our actions... and not how others think about us..."
The song is taken from the Pokemon 2000 soundtrack...
The Extra Mile
Countless eyes are watching In this our finest hour It's time to realize the dream Of who we really are I'm gonna freeze this space in time Rise to make the call Cease the moment Make it mine And through it all
Straight as the arrow flies I will run towards the finish line With all the strength I've found My feet won't touch the ground I will scale the heights if I believe The wings of faith will carry me I'll go the distance just to reach The arms I'm running to I'll go the extra mile for you
I know it won't be easy To make you understand I want to take the glory And put it in your hands 'Cause your the light that makes me shine You're the hero in my eyes Win or lose Do or die?
Straight as the arrow flies I will run towards the finish line With all the strength I've found My feet won't touch the ground I will scale the heights if I believe The wings of faith will carry me
I'll go the distance just to reach The arms I'm running to I'll go the extra mile for you (Go the extra mile) In the end (Go the extra mile) I want to be able to say
Tell the world to see
I would do it all again I'd go the extra mile
Straight as the arrow flies I will run towards the finish line With all the strength I've found (All the strength I've found) My feet won't touch the ground I will scale the heights if I believe The wings of faith will carry me I'll go the distance just to reach The arms I'm running to
I'll go the extra mile For you
Knowing it will be worth while I will go the extra mile For you
29 Mar 2008
Hmm... today went to nanyang sports carnival... so boring lar... nth to do... so sit there play uno cards... anyway... i juz realise something... its impossible for me to click to my classmates bah... haiz... dun ask me why lar... but its impossible... anyway... there a few things i wana mention that keeps me very irritated... firstly... if u duwan me to go with u all.... dun ask everyone to go out... and ask everyone not to let me noe u all plan to go somewhere... secondly... dun ask everyone to go one big round and try to shake me off on the way... cos it wun work... cos i can foretell ur actions... if u duwan me to go out with u all... juz tell me politely in the face that u all wana go somwhere without me... i will walk off de... well.. thats all i have to say for some ppl bah.... =/
28 Mar 2008
Haiz... y do i still miss this person so much???
27 Mar 2008
u noe... i always hated PE... pe sux... especially now.... run 5 rounds... den if timing abv 10min run 1 xtra round... den do standing broad jump and chin up.... now my leg very pain... got blister + muscle pain... sux xia... and i hate pe tchers... all the pe tcher all so guailan... hate chinese oso.. so what if most of the class get A for chinese? i get 1 grade lower.. i from fail to b3 happy for me le... u still say my results not gd wan give xtra lesson.. wth.. sux big time
26 Mar 2008
haiz... sianz... feeling sick... headache... and flu...
25 Mar 2008
results of some personality test from MBTI....
INFP type (Dominant Introverted Feeling) Usually gentle and kind, they are intense and passionate about their values and deeply held beliefs, which they share with trusted friends. Because of their discreet manner, their enthusiasm may not be apparent. They are sensitive to others' pain, restlessness or general discomfort and strive to find happiness, balance and wholeness for themselves in order to help others find joy, satisfaction and plenitude. They are deeply empathetic.
They live life in an intently personal fashion, acting on the belief that each person is unique and that social norms are to be respected only if they do not hinder personal development or expression. They strive to adhere to their own high personal moral standards and are particularly sensitive to inconsistencies in their environment between what is being said and what is being done. Empty promises of adhering to something they value – such as environmental causes or human rights - set off an inner alarm and they may transform themselves into modern day Joan of Arcs.
They are quietly persistent in raising awareness of cherished causes and often fight for the underdog in quiet or not-so-quiet ways. In a team, they will raise issues of integrity, authenticity, and good or bad, and may to opt out if the team refuses to address the questions raised.
They are usually tolerant and open-minded, insightful, flexible and understanding. They live for the understanding of others and feel deeply grateful when someone takes the time to get to know them personally. They have good listening skills, are genuinely concerned, insightful, and usually avid readers. At their best, they inspire others to be themselves.
hmm... sounds much accurate den ytd tarot card reading....
24 Mar 2008
Hmm reading some tarot card readings from tickle... Your Present The Emperor represents the primary influence on the current state of your life. Right now, in your present, you may be faced with a great challenge that requires you to develop your leadership and problem-solving skills. Getting this card in this position may be a sign that logical thinking and strategizing is what's necessary in your current situation. At the same time, beware of letting your intellect overshadow your emotions. Instead, allow clear feelings to inform your reasoning, and seek the advice of a wise authority figure.
The Emperor is the fifth card to appear in the Major Arcana, and stands for authority and leadership. In this card he sits on his throne, holding the ancient Egyptian ankh in one hand, symbolizing wisdom. In the other hand sits the globe of dominion, suggesting his power. He is wearing a suit of armor and is flanked by rugged mountains, symbolizing strength. The Emperor is the Earth Father, representing logic and clear reasoning, as well as your paternal instincts. This card can be a sign that you may need to seek counsel from someone wise, or that you need to deal with an authority figure in your life.
There are a number of ways this card could be playing out right now. Some possibilities include:
* You may need to take the lead in your love life and make a strategic decision. * Perhaps you need to reassess your finances and seek advice for some long-term planning * You may need to take a stronger role in caring for your long-term health and well-being. This could mean finding a new doctor, researching health insurance, or trying a new fitness routine.
Your Past
The Hanged Man exerted a significant impact on your past. This means that at some point in your past, you may have been in a situation in which you willingly sacrificed what you knew in order to achieve enlightenment. Perhaps you experienced a complete reversal in your lifestyle, or simply allowed yourself to make concessions you'd never before been willing to make. Your response to the situation you were tied to, and the reactions it elicited from others, brought you to the point you're at today.
The Hanged Man is card thirteen, representing self-sacrifice and letting go. Rather than dangling by his neck, this Hanged Man is being held by a T-cross of living wood. His position is more like a restful yoga pose, as he meditates and waits for the universe to lead the way. The red, blue, and yellowish white of the card symbolize his passion, contemplation, and spiritual vitality, respectively. This card is about the contemplation of self-sacrifice for the greater good. The Hanged Man surrenders to a higher wisdom for the potential of personal growth. He is open to possibility and tolerant of all ideas and philosophies.
This card may have affected the overall tenor of your life, or just a particular area. Following are a few possibilities for how you experienced these influences in your past:
* You may have had to make a drastic departure from the ways and beliefs of your family in order to move forward in your life. * In your social life, you may have had to give up friendships that were holding you back. * You may have had to make a sacrifice in your romantic relationship in order to make the relationship work, or you may have had to let go of a love to allow for personal growth.
Your Future Your future, as it currently stands, is represented by the third card you chose. Temperance is the card of patience, which indicates that at some point soon, you may find your patience being tested. In order to achieve harmony and balance, you'll need to respond with cooperation and self-discipline. Put yourself in other people's shoes to develop a deeper understanding. When the situation presents itself, choose adaptability over indecision.
Temperance represents patience. The archangel Michael is pouring the essence of life out of a silver cup into a golden cup, representing the flow from the unconscious to the conscious and back again. One of his feet is perched on water and one is placed on land, representing the balance between logic and emotions. This is the card of self-discipline and the ability to achieve harmony with others. It reminds you to go with the flow of life, and to try to see where others are coming from.
More than any other step of life's journey, this card represents the lessons you must learn and the experiences in store for you in your upcoming karmic destiny. This may impact you in any number of ways, including:
* Your romantic partner may act in ways you find distressing, unless you can adapt to this new behavior. * A co-worker or boss may try your patience, requiring you to empathize with their viewpoint instead of dismissing it. * You may need to cooperate with a family member's requests in order to maintain harmony in your family.
hmm... although some are quite true... some i still find it disturbing... well.. yes indeed i have changed quite alot... as i have said in my previous posts... and y are all the cards pointing to my love life??? is there smt wrong with it?? hmm... dun think its true.... and i will nev let go of my friends.... so pls dun make me...
and i oso read something on my email...
THIS IS JUST TOO BEAUTIFUL NOT TO SHARE ...
I N N E R H A P P I N E S S
I live in Indore, in India's heartland. On our way back from an adjacent town, my friend and I stopped at a highway dhaba. Placing our order, we stretched ourselves out on the cane chairs. A motley group of people occupied other tables. As we glanced around desultorily, a ragged man sauntered in and sat down. He poured himself a glass of water from the steel jug. He drank two whole glasses, but ordered no food, nor did the dhaba boys ask him. When our tea and samosas arrived, he looked at the food, filled his glass again and drank it. We saw no greed in his eyes, but it was an easy guess, that the guy was hungry and had no money.
The dhaba boy told us, "Oh! That madman comes in everyday. If he has money, he eats something; otherwise he just drinks a few glasses of water and leaves. My boss said that since water has been given to us by the Lord, we must never stop anyone drinking it at our dhaba."
This logic really touched me. I asked the boy to serve the man a plate of samosas. When he did so, the man looked at him. The boy pointed to us. The man looked at us but made no acknowledgement. As he picked up the first samosa, a little girl in rags walked up and just stood there. He gave her the samosa, which she wolfed down. He picked up the second one and handed that to her, too. She grabbed it and ran away. He pushed away his empty plate, filled up his glass again, drank the water and walked away from the dhaba without a backward glance.
I asked myself if I were capable of a gesture like that. The most I could muster was, "I HOPE so". If sharing what we have in excess is generosity, then how would we describe what that madman did? 'Selfless love'?
It is what intellectuals talk about and madmen practice.
Happiness comes from spiritual wealth, not material wealth...
Happiness comes from giving, not getting.
If we try hard to bring happiness to others,we cannot stop it from coming to us also.
To get joy, we must give it, and to keep joy, we must scatter it
Juz came bk from sentosa... Todays plan almost spoiled... My class started planning to go Sentosa last week... Alot ppl say wan go de... suddenly today onli 12 appeared... buy tidbits.... den nid to buy frisbee and beach volleyball.. cos ppl say wan bring den nev come... in the end... went to monorail... so many ppl queing... so they wanted to change to movies... den movie oso long queue... very ex oso... den we say take bus go Sentosa... and the stupid Bus Interchange nobody de... wth..in the end reach sentoa is 230le... den we go Palawan Beach play... quite fun lar... tossed alot of ppl into the sea... den eat dinner tgt den come home le lor.. todays outng quite interesing... ohya... in the morning... went to Gd Friday mass... well... during mass i thot of lots of stuff of my life... and during my journey bk home too... i realised how much my family meant to me.... and i oso realised how little times i had with my parents... how little i noe about them... i feel that i wana spend more time with them... juz like when i was young.... haiz... when im young... life was like so carefree and happy... no wonder they say children lead a simple carefree life... while adults are sophisticated and complex minded... Children seem happier den adults... so, i muz be like children... be simple minded... dun think too far... juz like wad auntie quek said to me... and i oso feel that i shd be more optimistic... look at the bright side of life... dun keep thinking about the bad things... enjoy wad u have, dun ask for too much... and above all u muz be happy in wadeva u do... den u will find life is worth living ^^
19 Mar 2008
Bored nth to do no tcher during lesson. So now youtubing n bloggging in classroom lol...
18 Mar 2008
Today pr bdae. Nth much juz a cake tts all
17 Mar 2008
I keep walking past this banner in sch.... Its the piano ensemble de... it says How your life goes depends on how you play it... Juz like how music goes depends on how you play the keyboard... i keep pondering over this.. it kinda make sense... and how somone use to tell me... how happy ur life goes depends on how u run it... if u wan it happy, make it happy. dun let life control u, u shd control it... If u want something to happen, u shdnt wait for it to happen.. cos u noe it will either not happen, or it takes a long time to happen.... if u wan smt to happen, den make it happen... do smt to make it happen... if u wan to change smt, then take intiative to make a change... dun wait for others to change for u... I was oso pondering over wad didi told me last time... if u fall pick up urself... dun give up so easily... haiz... tts wads been keeping me strong... everytime i feel like falling... i always think of didi and wad he said... and i will always push myself up and walk again... Cannot find friends in pri and sec sch nvm... try again in JC lor... no friends nvm... i still got my didis, meimeis, jie, kor, dar, mummy, somone and clifford mar =) who cares if i got friends or not... worse come to worse still got Carrot and Tomato (my tigger and pooh) And this is wad somone used to tell me... =) Always look on the bright side of life =)
15 Mar 2008
Haiz... i really got nth to say... if u wan to continue blaming urself for everything... den u go ahead lor... i rmb i was once like tt oso... den kena scolded by didi... he tell me that ppl who self pity onli wan others to pity them... if u really think that u ought to be blame for the mistakes.. den take initiative to admit u r wrong and then take measures to prevent the mistakes from happening... and that was when i started to wake myself up... he thot me that emoing is useless... emoing doesnt help... onli make things worse... want something to happen den make it happen... dun sit that to wait for smt to happen... thats y we are planned to meet by god... i wana help this whole family... i duwan u to repeat my mistakes... its whether u r willing to give me the chance to change all of u... if didi is willing den y cant u? haiz... im really speechless... i duwan say anymore le... its ur life y shd i care? its becos i love u thats y i want to do smt about u... its because i care thats y i duwan u to repeat my old mistakes...
15 Mar 2008
Definition of some things i read on the internet... Love Partner - Somone who love you want to take care of you and is always there when u nid them, somone who can share happiness and sadness with Dear - You are precious to me and i treasure you Darling - I cherish you and love you Family - I wana help u in everything in your life juz as you to me Best Friend - Somone who understands you most Friend - We understand each other and we care for one another Love - I wana take care of you and give you happiness and i will sacrifice anything for you Like - I admire you and your actions Understand - I noe wad probs are going on in your mind and i wana help in any ways i can Care - I am concern for you and wad you do Trust - I am honest in everything i say and i nev lie to u Hugs - I trust you Kiss - I Love you
So actually theres nth wrong with saying or doing these to those arnd u... its not like u can onli use it on ur bf/gf or smt...
14 Mar 2008
Went for Kbox today... nth much.... juz singing and singing... put my mind off for awhile... haiz... den didi ytd left his project at my hse... den i muz go home get... didi hor... so forgetful de...
13 Mar 2008
today didi came over my hse... he wanted to do work de... in the end... he spent most of his time using the com searching for games... anyway... its gd tt the 3 of us (me didi and kor) can finally spend time tgt.... been a long while since we spent time with each other... anyway... jie coming back to SG tonight... really wana tok to her again... miss her alot...
12 Mar 2008
today abit kisiao leh... one person go out watch movee shopping...lol.. i saw wrong time sommore.... wanted to go bishan... saw marina time... heng... got double check b4 gg out... so watch both death note and leap year... den shopping alone lor... den now kor staying over my hse.... didi wana come but his parents dun allow.. sobs... anyway... the leap yr is quite an okok show lar.. cried quite alot.. keep thinking of my family... and somone... and dar... haiz... and the songs quite sad oso... make my cry more... and i juz found out something... i see things differently from ppl... i find that in almost every case... i see many views that others dun see... its juz wierd...
11 Mar 2008
today originally plan go watch deathnote with tim... den joon say he wan watch le wan watch the eye... lol.... anyway he really crazy.. we wana walk from plaza to the cathay.. den raining... den he pay $2.80 for less than 1 min ride lol.. den after show duno do wad... den eat yoshinoya den go home lol...
10 Mar 2008
Well anyway today went back to see how the band rot... lol... anyway flute this yr got 3 junior... duno the conductor suck cock or wad... 3 weeks onli can play 5 notes??? wth... i teach ah joon first day 4 octave... second day the whole I recommend finish le... today i teach one junior oso can play 4 octave le... conductor can go kam lan lar... lol... oops... i think i tio influnced the moment i stem into montfort... so many crude words... paiseh... anyway... now i still waiting for my desktop to com in 2 weeks... sobs... by the time cant play le...
9 Mar 2008
Well.... today got my new phone... my Sony Ericsson W890I juz came out on thurs? so i decided to buy... the silver color so chio.... haha...
8 Mar 2008
Haiz... feel very tired... yet cannot slp... duno y i feel so sad... after few hours of happiness... wad so gd about buying a new laptop and desktop... when no ones there for me to share my happiness with... now bk to sadness again... this totally sux... cant even slp... haiz... duno wad to do.... no one to tok to.... all slping...
7 Mar 2008
I feel that the level camp is very meaningful lar... it really help the class to bond together and work together... it teach me that we shd all trust and work with one another... and for once i really feel happy after so many days... i really feel happy juz now when i was with my class... and i hope this happiness doesnt die off... and im still waiting for the right person to turn up... the person who i can tok to.... and the song The Extra Mile by Laura Pausini... i started as hearing the song from Janice blog ytd nite... den duno y today hear the same song during camp... find the song very meaningful... i feel really motivated to really go the extra mile for the people i love... anyway... all camps over.... start studying!!!! lol... duno whether shd go find my didis during march holi in band... gtg le bb!
6 Mar 2008
Haiz... today got level camp... they were asking on wad are the goals u have in life... and y r they important? firstly, in the short term... i wana make new friends.... i feel that ever since young... im always very lonely... i wana make more friends... and i din get the chance during my past 16 yrs... i dun wana face the same solitude again... i wan somone who can tok to me... somone who can unds how i feel... and somone who cares for me... secondly, i wana score at least 3 As for my alev... i wana get into the course i want in uni... biomolecular... i wana go into research, so that i can find the cure to many things like AIDs and cancer... i wana help change the world... and make this world a better place to live in... i wana stop the people from suffering from these diseases... so that theres no more ppl suffering silently in the world... this world will be a happy place to be in... with no more sadness.... lastly, i wan the people around me, and my loved ones to be happy... i wan to make them happy... and oso the whole world happy... i dun wana see anymore sadness, anymore chaos, hurt, and suffering... haiz... wad a weird goal i have... duno whether possible... and i oso juz realised that the people who love others and care for others to make them happy are the one who sacrificed their own happiness.... they are the one who lacked the love and care... and they are the one who need them most.... for the sake of their love ones.... they care and love them... in return, they lose their own happiness... and i feel that it is worth it... i dun mind sacrificing all i have... to make my love ones happy.... and theres oso this song... they played during the camp... to tell us not to give up... but i feel that theres something diff i feel about the song... other than the dun give up thingy... i duno how to explain lar... but its somewhat very touching... make me think of some people... den make me cry... sommore during the camp... so xia suay
Love Me
I read a note my Grandma wrote back in 1923 Grandpa kept it in his coat, and he showed it once to me He said, "Boy, you might not understand, but a long, long time ago, Grandma's daddy didn't like me none, but I love your Grandma so.
We had this crazy plan to meet and run away together Get married in the first town we came to and live forever But nailed to the tree where we were supposed to meet instead I found this letter, and this is what it said :
"If you get there before I do Don't give up on me I'll meet you when my chores are through I don't know how long I'll be
But I'm not gonna let you down Darling wait and see And between now and then Til I see you again
I'll be loving you Love, Me."
I read those words just hours before my Grandma passed away In the doorway of the church where me and Grandpa stopped to pray I know I've never seen him cry in all my fifteen years But as he said these words to her, his eyes fill up with tears
"If you get there before I do Don't give up on me I'll meet you when my chores are through I don't know how long I'll be
But I'm not gonna let you down Darling wait and see And between now and then Til I see you again
I'll be loving you Love, Me."
5 Mar 2008
There is many things in life i wana do... and theres many things i would like to fulfill... but we shdnt be greedy... we shd appreciate and treasure wad we have... especially the things or ppl around u that god have given us... and i really feel im a lonely person... at home... im alone... in sch... im always alone... i travel alone.... i do everything alone... i spend my time alone... i really do sound like a loner.... will there be somone who will stand by me? to juz even pei me?
4 Mar 2008
Y? ppl say that staying as friends is best... u dun have to worry about wad u say... u dun have to think whether the things will hurt them... u can say anything u have in ur heart... they wun mind... but when ur in a relationship.... whether it is bgr... or family... u have to keep some things to urself... afraid tt u will hurt the other party.... sometimes even to the extent of lying... but is this wad a relationship shd be? i thot a relationship shd be smt that involves trust and honesty... y? if relationship means needing to lie and hide... isnt it better if there was no relationship at all? wad is family when u cant even share ur probs with them? wad is family when they dun share probs with u? and wad is family if u cant even help them or them to u...
3 Mar 2008
haiz... was wacthing the ch8 7pm show... somone said " The north star is very loyal, always guiding ppl to north. And so i am like the north star, i am always loyal... and my love will remain unchanged..." duno y i see this i feel like crying lor.... and sommore they guy reject the girl... still got another part which says... the one u love most is the one u hate most... haiz... so sad... duno y i keep thinking of some ppl... and i seriuosly nid to find somone to tok to soon... i think im falling emo again... duno wads gg on... help!!!
2 Mar 2008
haiz... i juz realised how easily it is for everyone to part... one day u meet somone... next day u dun see them anymore... the only things u can think about is the times u spend tgt... i dun wan u to be juz mere memories... i wan u to be beside me... and tt we will nev part... haiz... i feel like im immuned to it le... parted so many times with so many ppl... haiz... y? y cant everyone stay tgt forever?
1 Mar 2008
Haiz... i duno wad to say lar... juz feel that without jie.. this whole family seems to be not as happy.... duno how the others feel lar... didi oso dun tok to us for very long le... haiz... duno wad to do... and still no response from jie... really worried for her... jie... if u reading this... pls noe that we are all worried for u... can u pls contact us.... haiz....
29 Feb 2008
I din noe todays a leap year!!! and i really wana watch the show leap year!!! anyone wana go watch?? anyway today is the first time i see my class... and all of them are like so quiet.... not the usual self lol... anyway looking forward to orientation 2!!!!!
27 Feb 2008
Haiz... jc life is worse than sec sch after all.... although both schs got no friends... at least i still got my didis to pei me... now jc totally nth.... my reason to go jc is becos of kor and jie.... they wan us 3 to same jc same course... in the end... one left sg.... one duwan come ny.... shd have went to nyp instead.... no use staying in jc... haiz... jc life is juz so boring... always sitting alone.... only accompanied by some sch mates every now and den.... how i wish... i lose my memory and forget who i am.. den none of this would have happened ='(
24 Feb 2008
After thinking back... i realised how much i have changed after meeting this somone.... Before: Im very stubborn, Selfish, "I,Me,Myself", no feelings, lonely, always keep to myself After: Less stubborn, more caring, show feelings easily, less lonely, got ppl to share my problems to anyway... i juz realised tt this somone really changed alot of my personality... well... its a gd thing right? aiya duno y so random lol....
23 Feb 2008
well... at least if u have your own problems... cant u juz own up and tell me? y muz u keep hiding things from me de? u noe u like tt my heart will keep on breaking de leh... a family is for wad de? u got problems juz say out... we will all help u de... if u duwan help den fine... might as well forget totally about the whole family... the whole point about being family is to love care and help each other... u think i duwan tok properly with u? u think i wan scold u everytime we tok? i scold u cos i duwan u to do smt stupid and end up regretting... if u duwan listen fine... tell me... i will stop bothering u and not cos u more despair!!! i give u a choice... either we can be family... let us help one another... or I can leave... i wun bother u or ur life anymore.... the door is open... juz tell me and i will disappear from ur life totally... wads the point of trying to help me out of emo... when u cant even help urself? i noe u wan ur loved ones to be happy... i unds... cos tts wad i wan too.. but if u r cant even stay happy urself... theres no way u can make others happy...
22 Feb 2008
Haiz... wadeva i say... no one believe de... wadeva i say... everyone dun listen de... in the end... something happen... everyone sad... everyone hurt... den u all realise u should have listened.... y? y cant ppl juz open thier ears and listen to anything tt comes... y muz they be so stubborn and do wad they like... and in the end cos hurt to everyone??? haiz... i feel so useless lor...
WHEN YOU'RE GONE
I always needed time on my own I never thought I'd need you there when I cry And the days feel like years when I'm alone And the bed where you lie is made up on your side
When you walk away I count the steps that you take Do you see how much I need you right now
[Chorus] When you're gone The pieces of my heart are missing you When you're gone The face I came to know is missing too When you're gone The words I need to hear to always get me through the day and make it ok I miss you
I've never felt this way before Everything that I do reminds me of you And the clothes you left, they lie on the floor And they smell just like you, I love the things that you do
When you walk away I count the steps that you take Do you see how much I need you right now
[Chorus]
We were made for each other Out here forever I know we were, yeah All I ever wanted was for you to know Everything I'd do, I'd give my heart and soul I can hardly breathe I need to feel you here with me, yeah
haiz... duno y i keep hearing this song... den hear le go crazy... really miss somone...
21 Feb 2008
well.... after a nites thinking... i decided to take physics and drop bio... Firstly if u take a look at NTU and NUS courses... Almost all need physics... however.. onli a couple needed bio.. but those courses tt need bio says tt muz take EITHER BIO or PHYSICS... so physics seems to be able to get a wider range of courses... next... if i take bio... muz go overseas find job... SG bio sector too small... and i muz get a PHD in order to find jobs... lastly... my physics is stronger than bio... and i cant seem to memorise cos i got STML... so physics will be my new subject lor... haiz... i will miss Gary Neo's and Vincent Qwek's Jokes... sobs...
20 Feb 2008
haiz... i thot that after JAE life is better... i was looking forward to NYJC with kor... now he cannot get in... juz lost my mood to go to sch... and now... duno to take physics or bio....
19 Feb 2008
today wanted to collect cabal activation code with my didis... den yisheng say deathnote got preview... so wanted to watch with them then next week watch with timmi... den no death note... so giddy say wan watch jumper... anyway... i got my posting at 730am.... went to nanyang... kor couldnt go... he went to serangoon... nanyang this yr single digit... haiz... now im alone again...
17 Feb 2008
Juz watched rambo 4... its really very terrible and sadistic lor... alot of fightings and killings... u can see body parts being blown apart... its terrible... y cant this world be a much peaceful place?? y muz there be fighting everywhere? y cant everyone treat one another with love? hatred...hatred... and more hatred... is this a fact that cannot change??
What Rainald Means
You are wild, crazy, and a huge rebel. You're always up to something. You have a ton of energy, and most people can't handle you. You're very intense. You definitely are a handful, and you're likely to get in trouble. But your kind of trouble is a lot of fun.
You are usually the best at everything ... you strive for perfection. You are confident, authoritative, and aggressive. You have the classic "Type A" personality.
You tend to be pretty tightly wound. It's easy to get you excited... which can be a good or bad thing. You have a lot of enthusiasm, but it fades rather quickly. You don't stick with any one thing for very long. You have the drive to accomplish a lot in a short amount of time. Your biggest problem is making sure you finish the projects you start.
You are very intuitive and wise. You understand the world better than most people. You also have a very active imagination. You often get carried away with your thoughts. You are prone to a little paranoia and jealousy. You sometimes go overboard in interpreting signals.
You are relaxed, chill, and very likely to go with the flow. You are light hearted and accepting. You don't get worked up easily. Well adjusted and incredibly happy, many people wonder what your secret to life is.
You are balanced, orderly, and organized. You like your ducks in a row. You are powerful and competent, especially in the workplace. People can see you as stubborn and headstrong. You definitely have a dominant personality.What's Your Name's Hidden Meaning?
16 Feb 2008
haiz... last nite dreamt of smt bad.... den i woke up.... den cannot slp le.... haiz... i very scared the dream come true... sobs....
14 Feb 2008
Happy Valentines Day to everyone!! well... isnt really very happy lar.... haiz... still feeling very down these days... maybe still worried about jie bah.... haiz... and partly cos well... got alot of things that i need somone to hear me say out... unfortunately... its impossible... cos theres no one whos willing to listen to everything i say... tts the reason i started this blog... so tt i can express wadeva i want.... well... im juz very sad lar... i thot that this time i really found somone who can hear my probs... little do i noe tt... its still the wrong person.... i really want somone to unds and care for me... haiz... everytime i tok to the person.... the person always feel hurt... tts not wad i meant lor... haiz... no wonder they say the closer u get to someone.... the more both gets hurt... now i unds wad it means... imagine everytime u want to tell ur loved ones smt.... but u have to consider how the other feels.... so u cant say everything out... if theres really somone out there in this world... who i can get closer to... and can still say everything i want... so... i still have to stick to toking to bears bah... and to the person... pls dun always let ur emotion get hold of u... everytime u dun keep ur cool... u will always do smt to hurt those arnd u.... its better to speak ur mind out in a calm manner... den to act rashly... and another thing... juz keep in mind tt behind every cloud... theres always a silver lining... dun always think of giving up... whenever u fall down... pick urself up.... This is wad didi taught me.... and dun 4get... u got ur family and friends to pick u up... lastly... if u duwan help urself... theres nth i can do to help u... u everytime tok to me either angry or emo... u let ur emotions overun wad u want to say... i noe tt all humans have feelings... but u have the power to control urself... juz try to do everything peacefully... haiz... and theres no use trying to keep things from me... jean grey knows all... its not i duno... its juz tt i duwan cause more trouble... juz to remind u... i dun mind u sharing unhappy stuff with me... but if u r gona treat me as smt to venge ur emotions... den u go cool urself b4 coming to me...
13 Feb 2008
Read this on my email... JANUARY=SHYNESS > Fun to be with. Loves to try new things. Boy/girls LOVE you. You are > very hott. Secretive. Difficult to fathom and to be understood. Quiet > unless excited or tensed. Takes pride in oneself. Has reputation. > Easily consoled. Honest. Concerned about people's feelings. Tactful. > Friendly. Approachable. Emotional temperamental and unpredictable. > Moody and easily hurt. Witty and sparkly. spazzy at times.Not > revengeful. Forgiving but never forgets. dislikes nonsensical and > unnecessary things. Guides others physically and mentally. Sensitive > and forms impressions carefully. Caring and loving. Treats others > equally. Strong sense of sympathy. Wary and sharp. Judges people > through observations. Hardworking. No difficulties in studying. Loves > to be alone. Always broods about the past and the old friends. Waits > for friends. Never looks for friends. Not aggressive unless provoked. > Loves to be loved. Easily hurt but takes long to recover. Repost this > in the next 5 mins and your reputation will boost someway in the next > 12 days > > FEBRUARY=SMARTS > Abstract thoughts. Loves reality and abstract. Intelligent and clever. > Changing personality. Attractive. sexiest out of everyone.A real speed > demon. Has more than one best friend. Temperamental. Quiet, shy and > humble. Honest and loyal. Determined to reach goals. Loves freedom. > Rebellious when restricted. Loves aggressiveness. Too sensitive and > easily hurt. Gets angry really easily but does not show it. Dislikes > unnecessary things. Loves making friends but rarely shows it. Daring > and stubborn. > Ambitious. Realizing dreams and hopes. Sharp. Loves entertainment and > leisure. Romantic on the inside not outside. Superstitious and > ludicrous. Spendthrift. Tries to learn to show emotions. Repost this > in 5 mins and you will talk to someone new and realize that you are a > perfect match. > > MARCH=GORGEOUS > Drop dead gorgeous!!!Attractive personality.Very! sexy.Affectionate & > Secretive. Naturally honest, generous and sympathetic.Chatterbox! > Loves to talk alot! Loves to get their way! . Unbelievable kisser! > Easily angered. Very stubborn in the most way possible! Loves to get > noticed! Willing to take risks for others. Makes good choices. Has a > great fashion sense! Maybe a little too popular with others * wink > wink*. Outgoing and crazy at times! Intelligent. Can sometimes be a > heartbreaker! Can love as much as possible! Hates insults. Loves > compliments! A very big flirt! Trustworthy. Appreciative and returns > kindness. The best in bed out of MFE these months!! Hardly shows > emotions. Tends to bottle up feelings. Observant and assesses > others.If you repost this in the next 5 mins, you will meet your new > love in 8 days. > > > APRIL=SWEETIE > Stubborn and hard-hearted. Strong-willed and highly motivated. Sharp > thoughts. Easily angered. Attracts others and loves attention. Deep > feelings. Beautiful physically and mentally. Firm Standpoint. Needs no > motivation. Shy towards opposite sex. Easily consoled. Systematic > (left brain). Loves to dream. Strong clairvoyance. Understanding. > Sickness usually in the ear and neck. Good imagination. Good physical. > Weak breathing. Loves literature and the arts. Loves travelling. > Dislike being at home. Restless. having many children. Hardworking. > High spirited. If you repost this in the next 5 minutes, you will > become close to someone you do not speak to much in the next 4 days. > > MAY=SEXY > Suave and compromising. Funny and humorous. Stubborn. Very talkative. > Calm and cool. Kind and sympathetic. Concerned and detailed. Loyal. > Does work well with others. Very confident. Sensitive. Positive > Attitude. Thinking generous. Good memory. Clever and knowledgeable. > Loves to look for information. Able to cheer everyone up and/or make > them laugh. Able to motivate oneself and others. Understanding. Fun to > be around. Outgoing. Hyper. Bubbly personality. Secretive. Boy/girl > crazy. Loves sports, music, leisure and travelling. Systematic. Hot > but has brains. If you repost this in 5 mins, a cutie that's caught > your eye will introduce themselves and you will realize that you are > very much alike in the next 2 days. > > JUNE=PIMP > Loves to chat. Loves those who love them. Loves to takes things at the > center. Inner and physical beauty. Lies but doesn't pretend. Gets > angry often. Treats friends importantly. Brave and fearless. Always > making friends. Not easily hurt but recovers easily. Daydreamer. > Opinionated. Does not care to control emotions. Unpredictable. > Understanding. Fun to be around. Outgoing. Hyper. Bubbly personality. > Secretive. Boy/girl crazy. Loves sports, music, leisure and > travelling. Systematic. Hot but has brains. If you repost this in 5 > mins, a cutie that's caught your eye will introduce themselves and you > will realize that you are very much alike in the next 2 days. > > JULY=ATTITUDE > Outgoing personality. takes risks. feeds on attention. no self > control. kind hearted. Self confident. loud and boisterous. VERY > revengeful. easy to get along with and talk to. has an 'every thing's > peachy' attitude. likes talking and singing. loves music. daydreamer. > easily distracted. Hates not being trusted. BIG imagination. loves to > be > loved. hates studying. in need of 'that someone'. longs for freedom. > rebellious when withheld or restricted. lives by 'no pain no gain' > caring. always a suspect. playful. mysterious. 'charming' or > 'beautiful' to everyone. stubborn. curious. independent. strong > willed. a fighter. repost in 5 mins and you will meet the love of your > life > sometime next month. > > AUGUST=FLIRT > You've got the best personality and are an absolute pleasure to be > around. You love to make new friends and be outgoing. You are a great > flirt and more than likely have a very attractive partner, a wicked > hottie. Like somebody with an August brithday. It is also more than > likely that you have a massive record collection. When it comes to > films, you know how to pick them and may one day become a famous > actor/actress yourself - heck, you've got the looks for it!!! IN the > next 6 days you will meet someone that may possibly become one of your > closest friends, if you repost this in 5 minutes. > > SEPTEMBER=LOVER > Active and dynamic. Decisive and haste but tends to regret. Attractive > and affectionate to oneself. Strong mentality. Loves attention. > Diplomatic. Consoling, friendly and solves people's problems. Brave > and fearless. Adventurous. Loving and caring. Suave and generous. > Usually you have many friends. Emotional. Stubborn. Hasty. Good > memory. Moving, motivates oneself and others. Loves to travel and > explore. Sometimes sexy in a way that only their lover can understand. > if you do not repost this in the next 5 mins. someone very close to > you will become mad at you in the next 8 days. > > OCTOBER=HOTTIE > Trustworthy and loyal. Very passionate and dangerous. Wild at times. > Knows how to have fun. Sexy and mysterious. Everyone is drawn towards > your inner and outer beauty and independent personality. Playful, but > secretive. Very emotional and temperamental sometimes. Meets new > people easily and very social in a group. Fearless and > independent. Can hold their own. Stands out in a crowd. Essentially > very smart. Usually, if you ever begin a relationship with someone > from this month, hold on to them because their one of a kind. Repost > in 5 mins & you will excel in a major event coming up sometime this > month. > > NOVEMBER=THUG > This straight-up means ur the most good-looking Loyal and generous. > Patriotic. Competitive in everything. Active in games and > interactions. Impatient and hasty. Ambitious. Influential in > organizations. Fun to be with. Easy to talk to, though hard to > understand. Thinks far with vision, yet complicated to know. Easily > influenced by kindness. Polite and soft-spoken. Having lots of ideas. > Sensitive. Active mind. Hesitating, tends to delay. Choosy and always > wants the best. repost this in 5 mins & you will find true love at > 11:00 a.m. > >DECEMBER=BEAUTY > Loves to chat. Loves those who love them. Loves to takes things at the > centre. Great in bed. Inner and physical beauty. Doesn't pretend. Gets > angry often. A meaningful love life partner. Treats friends > importantly. Brave and fearless. Always making friends. It is all > about love and fairness. Easily hurt but recovers easily. Daydreamer. > Horny but does fullfill. Opinionated. Does not care to control > emotions. Knows what to do, to have fun. Unpredictable. Someone to > have close to you.Extremely smart, but definitely the hottest AND > sexiest of them all.
and today sux.... the whole class tio scolded by gary neo... sobs... cos no one finished the tutorial... so all go home do and pass up by tmr.... den today skip band... igot breathing problem... seems like my intercoastal muscles very pain... den i do bio hw till 11... dying le... so tired...
12 Feb 2008
Haiz... more things start to go even more wrong.... how i wish i can dump everything and start life again... or even better dun start at all.... haiz... i really nid somone to tok to... somone who is willing to listen to everything i say... somone who cares and understands me... ive been waiting for this person for so long... still got no one turn up yet... haiz... still waiting...
10 Feb 2008
haiz... this yrs new year sux... alot of things i planned couldnt go as planned.... firstly... im still having some problems of my own... then to make things worse... jie had to leave... which means some parts of my plans have to cancel... next, project still unfinished.... den vivi(vitoria) last min say cannot go her hse... so i thot go didi hse help him with his stuff.... den didi go out lunch and nev replied me.... and lastly i won onli 20cents for blackjack... haiz...
7 Feb 2008
jie... if u r reading this... pls rmb... tt wherever u go... u r always my jie.... i will nev forget u... and if u come bk to sg... can u find me pls... i really wana meet u... and there is smt i wana pass to u b4 u go... which i cant pass to u in time... jie... were gona miss u alot... ='( sobs.... and i cant stop crying....
6 Feb 2008
Today like no cny mood like tt leh... go sch till 915... den run to MSS... stupid benny ng duwan let us go in... den we go into MJS and to MSS thru the link gate lol... stupid guy... monitor every gate accept the link gate... anyway... saw my cute didi in sch.... den my other didi duno run to where le... and after so many days.... i finally get to see my classmates again... anyway tts all the CNY mood i have today... after tt is go shopping alone... so sian... no one pei me.... as always... im always alone... den went to my both grandparents hse for dinner... eat till fat le... lol... was smsing with vitoria on how fat we will be after cny zzz den went downstairs play with my little cousin sparklers... although quite childish lar... but got alot of childhood memories... almost every year the grass patch will catch fire... my cousin will throw the lighted sparklers onto the grass patch... and finally... got my hand burnt while playing with fire lol... anyway... it was very sian lar... i wish got somone pei me thru those boring hours... somone and something unique.... every year like almost same de... eat and gamble onli... nth special... haiz...
4 Feb 2008
Haiz... NYJC so boring now... no fun de.... no friends to tok to.... so sian.... i juz find tt im always alone again... anyway... all hope was about to fall lar... den suddenly got somone appear and started toking... tt time was PE lar... den duno y suddenly got one girl started toking to me... her name is Vitoria... she looks kinda familiar.... thot was my church friend or smt... but she turned out not.... haha... at least now not so lonely... still got korkor to pei me in sch... juz wished jiejie could come too...
3 Feb 2008
Juz downloaded some songs... i upload one of them on this blog k? its from ff8 eyes on me... very nice... go youtube watch this.... a music video on FF8 eyes on me...
1 Feb 2008
Very tired... juz came home from band.... dying le... im juz so tired.... tiredtiredtired... didi i wan baobao..... lol... i go slp le... *hugs "bolster" xmuakx and slp* ZzZzZz
30 Jan 2008
Haiz... i try my best to make those around me happy.... but they get sad instead... haiz.... wads wrong with me??? y cant everything go right for juz once? y muz everything end up wrong??? everytime i wana do smt... it always fails... y? if my loved ones cant get happy... is there still a reason for me to live mar??
28 Jan 2008
Haiz... thot when i enter jc.... everything can start anew... but i guess im wrong... still as lonely.... haiz... wish got somone there to tok to... i can easily sit there and emo whole day lor... no one there to care sobs.... and im like slowly moving away from my og mates... as well as all the ppl i noe in nyjc... ='( duno y lar... but smt seemed to have changed everything over the o lev results...
25 Jan 2008
walao... sianded.... nth to do..... sit at home rot.... no one pei me.... onli got those stupid games.... sianz lar!!! argh!!!
24 Jan 2008
im juz so happy!!! well firstly cos i got 6points for my o levs.... secondly i can get in same sch with kor and jie... well it came of a surprise to me... very shocked.... lloyd yeo actually mentioned the top 5 ppl... den suddenly finishing le... den say wait one last person.... den mention me.... i was like shocked.... amaths and emaths got a1 (as expected)... chinese and bio got b3 (both came as shocks...i thot get C de.... chem geog physics combine humans and eng got a2... all were shocks...( eng was usually b... humans was c... ohysics was expected... geog and chem papers being hard was expected to be B...) Chinese and bio got b3...( chinese usually just pass... bio was usually b4...) overall L1r5 is 10 but minus 4 points get 6.... haha... really very happy.... saying hi to my new flute and imac laptop soon ^^ anyway thkx to all my tchers for their hardwork and effort!!! Mr Alow, Mrs Anne Quek, Mdm Liang Min, Mr Howard Tan, Mrs Lee Poh Lin, Mr Edwin Lee, Mrs Lee Swee Hoon, Mr Lim Kim Huat and all the tchers i nev mentioned... and thkx to Mrs Susie Lim (my auntie who is also HOD of humans in SJC) For helping me with my humans ^^ I Love all of ya haha and didi... although u din manage to go to the hall due to lessons... thkx for sharing my joy after the results... and u even pangseh your friends for me and kor... thkx a lot... i love u xmuakx anyway im on holiday mood now so gratz to everyone =p
23 Jan 2008
Haiz... tmr is how de ne? wonder wad my feeling will be like when i see the piece of paper.... wonder wad my friends will be feeling too... isit happy? isit sad? isit nervous? or no feeling? well anyway... didi finally called tonite... after few weeks of nev call.... haiz... call oso like no use... wanted somone to pei me... to listen to my probs.... to share laughter... thot u have changed for the better... but u have obviously not.... and im like disappointed.... u call oso nev ask anything bout me... nev show any concern of any aspects of my life... and im always the one asking u instead... of hows life... hows sch.... haiz... u call or dun call oso make no diff... might as well dun call... call le onli make me crazy and full of diff feelings... sad... disapointed... and to some dulan extent... haiz... u still haven changed.... u r still the self centered person.... nev thinking of other ppls feelings... hurting ppl as though stepping on ants... although u make an effort to call... but the reason i wanted u to call.... is diff from the real reason u called... i juz hope u will become the same person i use to know... sry for the description i wrote above... but those are facts from my view... u were once a very caring and lovely person... that was 2 yrs ago.... we were like best friends.... or even best siblings.... there was so much love in our relationship.... den in less than 3 mths... some events led to our relationship to crumble... u start ignoring me.... quarelling with me in every single fault.... do u noe how painful i felt then? i was like crying every moment i see u or think bout u? i was wondering y u let some ppl ruin our friendship.... den when things started to get better.... u chose to stay away from me... as though i was like poison... saying and doing things tt hurt me.... i din wana say anything much... i thot tt if i can make u see the sacrifices i made for our relationship... u will change... but im wrong.... the more i give in to u... the more i get hurt... u dun even unds how i feel... u dun even make a point to unds me... u dun even treasure me at all... wads more important than ur family? i even chose to neglect my prelims and o lev last yr so tt i can help u with your end of yr exam.... although my exams may be impt and affect my future... but i put ur future in front of mine... i dun noe if u ever noe how much effort i try to put in this relationship... but i hope tt u too will at least put in abit more effort... our relationship now is like hanging on a thread... it will break anytime... and if u dun seal the loopholes.... den there goes everything... i can always let go and forget about u de... all it juz take is one word from u... and i can disappear from u forever.... its your choice...
22 Jan 2008
I really very happy.... found the song after so many mths of search... first love saxophone version!!! so romantic!!! haiz... if onli got flute and sax duet.... and i even found the eng version.... although its diff from the translation.... the lyrics is totally diff from the original translation... anyway i really love this song.... haha... and it always reminds me of somone...
21 Jan 2008
Haiz... watch shou zu... then see yu sheng and dino.... make me think of me and somone.... haiz... y? y isit tt relationship starts of as friends.... very gd friends.... who trust each other... tok to each other about probs... share everything... happiness... sadness... every moment they are tgt is happiness... after they get into a relationship... things changes.... they think more of each other... trying not to hurt each other... so the try to keep unhappy things from each other... wanting to please the other person... but the other person like being pleased... they keep even more secrets from each other... and in the end... they start drifting apart... haiz... i dun get it... ppl say happiness is bliss... hapiness is when u r with the person u love most... when both hearts beat as one... when every moment they share is full of laughter... haiz... if hapiness is like tt... den y cant i feel it... all i juz want is to feel some happiness.... like everyone else do... to just feel a pinch of joy.... to noe tt there is somone out there... who understands you.... who cares for you... and ultimately love you... it nid not be a bgr type of love... just some friend love... or family love... i will be satisfied.... somone who can really share with me... our everyday prob... happy ocassions... sad ones.... and somone i can pour my heart to.... somone i noe i can trust... and tt he or she wun mind me saying anything in my mind... anything including things tt he or she may not like it... things tt may end up hurting the person too... all i juz want is this special somone... whom i can count on anytime... be it to share my happiness... or my sorrow.... i juz wan to noe.... if there is this special person out there in the world... for me... and to this person out there... im waiting for u....
18 Jan 2008
Haiz... tze yu so sry i pangseh u.... my head and body really cannot take it le... i dun go home sure collapse in sch de.... hope u unds.... i giv u treat next time lar k? and some dumbdumb fish(beiyu) pangseh lor... say wan go band nev go... haiz... stupid body... if my body nev sick i wouldnt have pangseh her.... sobs....
17 Jan 2008
well last few days at sch really can smile... thkx tze yu and bei yu for the company... haven smiled for very long le... haiz... im really missing somone alot... i cant xplain y.... but this person keeps on coming into my mind... haiz... i really miss this person.... and if u r reading this... i really love u.... and i miss u very much.... ='(
16 Jan 2008
Juz came bk from sch... today went to pulau bukom shell plant... well learn lots of things.... and then lata went band... missed the old montfort band days bah.... haiz... still missing somone terribly.... duno y... haiz....
15 Jan 2008
Haiz... u have a happy childhood..... many friends.... ppl dun shun u when they see u.... no one tok bad about u.... or backstabs u... u wun unds how i feel de.... the longing for somone to tok to... somone u can pour ur heart to.... somone who can love u.... and u can love bk... u wun unds de.... especially when u r showered with love everywhere...
14 Jan 2008
Haiz... miss the noisiness of my og... now all diff class... so lonely le... eat oso alone... study oso alone.. haiz... anyway today got 3.5 hrs of free time... duno do wad sai... stay in library do hw.... alot tutorials.... and still awaiting o lev results... haiz...
12 Jan 2008
Today went out with OG10... went to fuji ice palace... go ice skating... have lots of fun... saw many ppl fall down.... and fell down few times because ppl stop in front of me...den no time break.... den leg got blister... so pain... we took 1 photo.... Fuji ice palace
11 Jan 2008
haiz... sry lar...i dun mean to scold u de... im really sry k.... my fault lar.... haiz...
today after sch went to NYP supprt tim... he got band performance for NYP open hse mar.... den saw mo and jason.... after performance cheong back to montfort.... got cca day.... haiz... now i ended up like tt again....
10 Jan 2008
Haiz... nev tok to somone for very long le... wonder how the person is feeling... well... if u r reading this... pls note that u r being missed severely... and if u can... pls call soon... haiz...
9 Jan 2008
Well today feeling much better after a rest... doctor say cant go sch.... really want go attend lesson de.... but since dardar wan me stay at home rest... jiu ting ta de hua lor... wanted to play maple... den got server check till 1pm.. went rakion instead... den about 2pm... went bk NYJC for CCA orientation... think maybe i go bk band bah... den can kapo the miyazawa haha^^
8 Jan 2008
Haiz... super irritated today.... feeling very sick.... yet still got so many probs in sch... Got fever... Sorethroat...Headache... Went Orchard with my friends... den suddenly tio all this... den have to pangseh them and zao home.... haiz... den still have to cope with sch probs... stupid rumours..... in montfort oso have... thot can start afresh in NYJC... but realised still cant... ='( den some ppl wuliao started saying bout me and Janice... haiz... duwan name names... but i hope they can really stop those.... me and her juz friends k? pls stop saying about us being more than friends... haiz... really very frustrating... den ppl still so keen on saboing me and her as CT rep... duno when these horrible things can stop...
7 Jan 2008
I redo everything of my pics in friendster le.... juz watch the slideshow bah haha.... anyway firstday of official sch.... sux lar... no more games.... den after sch i went heartland mall find kor... den go bk montfort find my didis... den go home rot.... den got homework sommore...
6 Jan 2008
Well i juz uploaded lots of pics... so if u wana see pls head down to my pics
5 Jan 2008
Heres the picture of my 2 beloved necklaces the one on right is the evenstar i bought in Nz cost $200 the one on left is the eagle given to me haha
anyway went to tims blog... saw this quiz... This was my analysis....
Your view on yourself: You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward. You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.
The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for: You are a true romantic. When you are in love, you will do anything and everything to keep your love true.
Your readiness to commit to a relationship: You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.
The seriousness of your love: You are very serious about relationships and aren't interested in wasting time with people you don't really like. If you meet the right person, you will fall deeply and beautifully in love.
Your views on education You may not like to study but you have many practical ideas. You listen to your own instincts and tend to follow your heart, so you will probably end up with an unusual job.
The right job for you: You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.
How do you view success: You are confident that you will be successful in your chosen career and nothing will stop you from trying.
What are you most afraid of: You are afraid of things that you cannot control. Sometimes you show your anger to cover up how you feel.
Who is your true self: You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.
The Real You:
1. You are a very serious person. You tend to be quiet and well behaved, and you don't have a great deal of self-confidence. You prefer to be alone rather than with friends and that could make you a little less interesting to certain types of guys. You are very attractive in an individual kind of way, and this means it can take people a little while to get to like you.
2. You really care about other people's feelings and are quite serious about the issues that affect your life. You are sincere, and your concern for the well-being of others makes many people want to be your friend.
3. You are a bright, cheerful and bubbly person. You are thoughtful and considerate, and like to have fun. Everybody feels comfortable around you because of your pleasant nature. When you walk into a room, people's eyes are likely to be drawn to you because of your charm.
4. Guys see you as being a thinker and a careful person. They will be really attracted to this quality in you, but you need to learn to speak your mind, otherwise people will find you too shy and quiet. Learn to relax and lighten up--it's okay to have fun sometimes. When you learn to develop your fun-loving side, guys are going to flock to your side.
5. Your boyfriend thinks that you are a real doll but this is not a totally positive thing. Sometimes you can be a bit too sweet, and come across as being helpless. If you're like this too frequently, your boyfriend and other people are likely to get tired of you having to rely on them all the time. Personality test
4 Jan 2008
Last day of orientation... looking forwrd to the disco nite haha wana see how it looks like... lots of water games.... wet alot ppl yet im still dry haha... well dance till very tired... no voice no energy.... zzzz
3 Jan 2008
2nd day in sch... alot of suaning between olympians... did some dance.... den went sentosa.... alot games... now so tired.... looking forward tmr disco pt haha
2 Jan 2008
First day of sch... saw some familiar faces... dominic...shrek...some seniors jeremy chan and daniel den the guy and girl all dun tok de.... den got some dance.... must find opposite gender de... zzz den all so shy... ayway first day quite fun...
1 Jan 2008
Happy New Year!!! well its a brand new yr again!!! went to take late xmas SS in maple haha... wanted to go vivo with joon didi for countdown den some ppl PS me nev call me... haiz... so sian... so now at home doing nth... thinking of last yr....
29 Dec 2007
Yeh im so happy... after 16 yrs i finally recieved my first xmas present!!!
27 Dec 2007
Haiz... duno y this few days feel abit wierd... i really mis alot of ppl.. very long nev tok to them le... den suddenly start toking again... haiz... now didi and kor overseas... left me alone in SG.... so sian... feel like rotting xia...
25 Dec 2007
Sry long time no blog... well firstly merry xmas everyone... Secondly... well this xmas gona be very lonely xmas... Haiz... and im still thinking of last yrs one... it seems much better.... without tt special somone... xmas isnt anything special... without tt person... xmas is juz a normal day... haiz...
21 Dec 2007
Haha finally reach SG le... i go pigg le bb...
19 Dec 2007
Haiz so many slpless nitez... keep thinking of my family... wonder if everythings alrite.... really miss them... haiz... 1 more day to ren b4 i take plane le... today went last minute shopping spree... keep swapping card lolz.... bought alot of books and clothes.... den came bk motel... watch almost like heaven... haiz... bring back alot of thots.... really feel very sad when watching tt show... feel as if smt is lost from inside me.... haiz... or actually... not smt but somone....
18 Dec 2007
Haiz last few nitez couldnt slp.... got feeling smt bad gona happen... very worried about my family (kor,didi,mei,jie and dar) dun wan anything happen to them.... maybe i juz missed them too much... anyway today went shopping spree... bought alot of souvenirs.... and lastly found the evenstar... Sterling Silver (92.5%) full pendant with Zircornia studded crystal in middle it was on $200 so i juz bought it... wanted a white gold... but its more than 1k.... sommore this silver evenstar is bigger than the two days ago de... haha i shall add a pic for u all to see... anyway one more day and i fly bk to sg le =p looking forward to see my family again ^^ i go watch southpark le bb
16 Dec 2007
Haiz... went all over NZ to find the "One Ring" for didi... but still cant find.... haiz... feel so useless... i found one evenstar pendant.... 9carat gold... and one crystal in the middle... omg so chio.... thot want buy... then saw 349... sianz half... if less than 200 i dun mind buying....
14 Dec 2007
wth... climb the mount doom from LOTR can die xia.... leg now like wth...... the slope go up is like omg lar... go down is like wt.. tmd long lor.... now on my bed massaging leg....
13 Dec 2007
Juz took a plane from christchurch to auckland... went to matamata to seesee hobbitton... everything so small lolz... den another half a day in car... sianz... but lucky got ipod and storybook...
12 Dec 2007
So sian... travelling for the whole day.... den went to cadbury choc factory... so think shd have a least 2mth supply of choc... haiz... miss all of u... nth to do so playing pokemon crystal...
11 Dec 2007
Sitting in the car whole day... rotting.... at night.... abut 10pm... went thru the cold wetnight find penguins... small little birds swimming to shore... cute little ones... juz wished my family was here with me.....
10 Dec 2007
Haiz... feeling very bored.... travelling most of the time... and aimlessely... not knowing where to go.... no guide no explanations... no nth.... haiz... no family... no dar... no didi... no korkor... no jie... no mei... even in the hotel... everyone doing their own stuff... in the car everyone slping.... no communication... juz stop by sceneries seesee take pic... haiz... i juz wan my family by my side....
9 Dec 2007
Went to deer park heights... went to visit the places where they took the lord of the rings movie... den after lunch nth to do... lunch sux... meat taste so rubbery.... anyway after lunch got nth to do.... went to try some jetboat... quite thriling and fun... anyway... dinner was much better... now very full... haiz... the sunset lakeview so nice... wished got my family beside me.... my dar...didis...kor...jie...and meis... haiz... mei you ni men pei wo... so lonely....
8 Dec 2007
Juz woke up... everyone still pigging... me typing with half eyes..... cant really slp well.... last few nites is super tired den slp de... haiz... really missing my family... my didis...kor...dar...meis and jie... hope to recieve their reply soon...
7 Dec 2007
Went to visit many nice sceneries... Lake Tekapo... The white mountains in LOTR 1... took alot of pics... will upload when possible... Food here very big and oso very ex... eg. one plate of small omelette here = Sg large omelette... haiz... y didi kor and dar haven reply yet.... haiz... at least still got carrot(tigger) ... and tomato(the pooh i got from my bdae from didi)... smuggled both of them into my bag.... parents ask y so big yet so light?? i say duno... maybe alot of air inside... -_-||| sianz....
6 Dec 2007
(dates are as in NZ) Plane ride super boring.... watch movie all the way... ratatouiie...hairspray...the invasion... well finally watched a horror on my own =p anyway... the seats really very spacious... slept like a pig for few hours... finally reached NZ at (12noon NZ time, 7am SG) tried to sms a few ppl... onli recieved replies from 2... haiz... ard starting to miss some ppl le... haiz... Nz so sian,,, bo internet... all muz pay de.... idiotic.... now i can onli blog using wordpad and upload another time...
5 Dec 2007
Finally hit 16 yrs haha can watch NC16 le xbleahx =p oh ya forgot to say i got a ipod touch haha.... quite cool.... got it a few days le... but wanted cute didi to know and try first haha
4 Dec 2007
Im juz so happy today ^^ Got my didi accompany me the whole day =) Didi came my hse in the morn =] Den we went to watch fred claus in the afternoon =} Den after tt go arcade => Didi help me tio a pooh bear so cute <= Den we went to the beach see sunset (= Im juz so happy today {= Hope everyday will juz be like today (= I will miss all of u when im away ^^
1 Dec 2007
haiz...hate some ppl totally... like some kind of big f*** think u can rule over every single shit Tts y i nev considered u as family... if u still unds den ask urself the way u tok to ppl Haiz...still trying to forget another ass hole... treat u so well in the past n now I ended up being backstabbed... haiz...suan le
30 Nov 2007
today didi and korkor came my hse again... watch movie.... den bought alot of snacks to munch while watching.... lolz and darrkshadow finally lev 85 le...
27 Nov 2007
Carrot didi happy bdae!!! haha =) today went with didi go watch enchanted... trust me u wan watch watch with 1 other person... its a couple show not a family show!!! lolz...
25 Nov 2007
Haiz... u try so hard to make me happy... yet now u tell me u wana leave... and everythings gona change bk to once before... wads the use of being happy... haiz...
23 Nov 2007
"A Thousand Miles"
Making my way downtown Walking fast Faces pass And I'm home bound
Staring blankly ahead Just making my way Making a way Through the crowd
And I need you And I miss you And now I wonder....
If I could fall Into the sky Do you think time Would pass me by 'Cause you know I'd walk A thousand miles If I could Just see you Tonight
It's always times like these When I think of you And I wonder If you ever Think of me
'Cause everything's so wrong And I don't belong Living in your Precious memories
'Cause I need you And I miss you And now I wonder....
If I could fall Into the sky Do you think time Would pass me by 'Cause you know I'd walk A thousand miles If I could Just see you Tonight
And I, I Don't want to let you know I, I Drown in your memory I, I Don't want to let this go I, I Don't....
Making my way downtown Walking fast Faces pass And I'm home bound
Staring blankly ahead Just making my way Making a way Through the crowd
And I still need you And I still miss you And now I wonder....
If I could fall Into the sky Do you think time Would pass us by 'Cause you know I'd walk A thousand miles If I could Just see you...
If I could fall Into the sky Do you think time Would pass me by 'Cause you know I'd walk A thousand miles If I could Just see you If I could Just hold you Tonight
22 Nov 2007
Last few days din post anything... cos i sitting at home rotting..... dying... badly... anyway... today went didi hse... haha... very long nev see him le... miss him alot... lolz actually onli 2 days onli lar... anyway... go his hse play maple... fell aslp on his bed... haha... duno y suddenly tired...
21 Nov 2007
Haiz.. some ppl duwan admit mistakes... suan le... forget it... i shant pursue it further... i wan to change u into a better person... since u duwan... jiu suan le lor...
18 Nov 2007
Stardust not a bad show... but alot of romance and stuff..... haiz... thinking of lots of things.... haiz =/ and some ppl are bent on making me sad =/ i will onli get angry on 3 conditions... 1. ppl lie to me 2. ppl break promises 3. ppl who keep things from me even if you are very close to me.... u r no exception..... u shd understand me much better than others... if u r bent on doing any of these... DEN DUN APPEAR IN FRONT OF ME AGAIN!!! AND I DUN EVER WANA SPEAK TO YOU TOO!!! AND WHEN I SAY IT I MEAN IT!!! U NOE MY FEELINGS HOR!!! WHEN IM SERIOUS I DUN JOKE DE!!! U HURT MY FEELINGS U = GOOD GAME!!! EVEN THOUGH I DUN LIKE DOING THIS.... I HAVE NO CHOICE....
17 Nov 2007
today go wildwildwet.... nth much lar.... play till rain then go off... nth to do... cant stop thinking of somone....
16 Nov 2007
oh... today went back to school.... got wad jc thingy... think i be gg to NYJC bah.... anyway got graduation today... lolz... grassroot club... everything so budget.... food sux sit sux everything sux.... next time change place lar.... ohwell... den after tt got buffet dinner... me and korkor went to didi hse there coffee shop eat dinner... haha... anyway gtg le... very tired...
15 Nov 2007
Raxom korkor.... happy bdae =) haha... well... im sry jeremy.... i cant go with u to sentosa... pls dun angry.... i really want to spend time with my family before i leave SG k? its not that i dun wana go..... u will still be remembered as one of my good friends in sch k? haiz.... today didi come my hse watch movie.... den last minute kor oso say he coming.... we watching Titanic, Meet the Parents and Fockers... haiz... wish can spend more time.... onli 8 hrs..... so little time.... haiz... i wana spend the entire day and night... no... its impossible.... haiz... sure will have parental objections from both sides de... haiz... so much things i want to do... so little time...
didi.... wad happen to u? y u suddenly so sick? haiz... didi... i oso feeling sick... duno y... i got some special connection with my loved ones... wad they feel... i oso can feel de... haiz... didi... im really very worried for u... u ok or not?? haiz.... didi... pls take care...
14 Nov 2007
went to band today... not very happy with certain things... i step outside band room see vivian tan there... ask me wad i doing here... den still ask me wear wad sch uniform... hello im no longer a student at montfort le... u cant make me wear that uniform get it? i wear shorts cannot ar? lower sec oso wear shorts y i cannot? i wearing sandals oso cannot mare? your member wearing slippers can i cannot wear sandals? see your "wtf u doing here" face i sianz 0.5 le... "u can onli come after o lev" bullshit! i finish o lev wad u tell me? "u come here for wad?" duwan me come duwan lor... haiz... din noe teachers are like this... anyway... i feeling very frustrated... duno tmr shd go Sentosa with lormee or go out with didi... haiz.... think until headache le...
13 Nov 2007
finally finish o lev le yeh!!! haha... didi today pei me go celebrate end of o lev... we go watch movee... actually thot of watching stardust cos we missed it that day.. den didi say wana watch game plan... so ok lor... he happy jiu ok.... the first show was fully booked.. so we watch the 430 show... we spent 3 hrs walking around... and playing arcade..... den the show... haiz... den got some triggered off memories... so u noe wad happened... after show didi wana go LAN... played CS.... den bring didi go home.... haiz.... how i wish everyday was like this... haiz... how i wish i could spend more time with my loved ones... haiz... my time is short.... i really wana spend more time...
12 Nov 2007
Haiz... if i can spend the rest of my time with my love ones... i can leave without regrets =/
11 Nov 2007
Finally band camp gona end le... 1pm and break camp le... yay can tok to didi soon le.... his hp flat so ytd and today cannot tok.... sianz... 3hrs seems like 3000 yrs....
Oh well this is all I can salvage my memories... I added all my lost memories I can ever find... Sadded still got one chunk of missing memories...
10 Nov 2007
Haiz... today band got amazing race... cant go.... got something on... haiz... really miss didi xia... miss the smiles and laughter... miss the cute face oso... haiz...
9 Nov 2007
extracts from Kingdom hearts two volume 1... Do u think we can be like this 4ever? No, our environment is ever-changing... We'll nev be able to get tgt like this everyday.... But what's important is how often we think about each other... We'll look back on this someday and laugh...
haiz... is memories the same as the real people? are photos the same as the real person? haiz... if we can hold on together..... ='(
today i went back to band camp.... go find didi haha.... had night walk to Kovan... so pei them go walkwalk lor... anyway some ppl dun let me step into sch mar... so i wait outside lor... den went home till about 11pm bah.... cant stay overnight oso... haiz....
8 Nov 2007
well today was suppose to stay at home play maple whole day... den suddenly didi ask me go out... so after lunch with relatives went to watch movee lor... suppose to watch 4pm stardust at Toapayoh... korkor tagg along oso... den arrived 10min late... so we took MRT go Junction8 watch... the show was at 650.... so we change... we watch bee movie... quite funny lar... but some parts oso very lame... well... thinking of alot of things during the show.. lots of reminders... and on the way reading kingdom heartz 2 comics... alot of feelings and emotions oso... haiz.... den ate Long Johns for dinner... den we took MRT to Yio Chu Kang and 70 to didi hse... about to go up bus 163 when didi call say his parents not at home.... ok lor so go pei him... sitting there quiet... watching didi playing... haiz... i wish time could stop forever... wished everyday was like this.... lots of emotions and feelings running again.... den reached home mum xploded.... cos i reach home too late... oh well... wei le didi jiu suan le lor.... haiz... since didi happy i shd be happy oso....
7 Nov 2007
haiz... isit still worth living if you cant make your loved ones smile? haiz... especially when ur causing more harm than good ='(
5 Nov 2007
Finally last paper2 paper gone... now left all mcq.... can start to play le... haha gd luk for the other papers ^^
4 Nov 2007
Feeling very sick this few days.... Duno y keep vomiting after meals... and oso cant slp..... keep thinging of somone..... and some things tt happen last time.... haiz.... wish i could be with tt somone.... then everytime fell aslp.... will dream and wake up de..... haiz...
1 Nov 2007
Haiz... ok lor now my fault...... haiz... want to help ppl..... then ppl say i xtra... say im the prob of everything... k lor... so now my fault.... next time u got any probs dun find me le..... i dun wana cause any problems... and i shall rmb to keep my mouth shut in case im accused of sowing discords again....
29 Oct 2007
haiz... how would u feel if there is no one to hear your probs... haiz... no one to voice yourself out to... especially when tt somone u can rely on cant be relied anymore...
28 Oct 2007
Haiz... y? y isit that i will always hurt the ppl around me? haiz... all my fault... how i wish i am all alone... so that i can hurt no one..... haiz.....
26 Oct 2007
Haiz... jeangrey xia... b4 hist exams start, got some feeling... thot that china japan and eastern europe will come out.. den really came out.... thot that something i read b4 will comeout... den really the sourcebased exactly the same as wad i read b4... lolz... haiz... nvm...
25 Oct 2007
looks like im gona screw up very badly for my o lev... all the questions nev see b4 de..... haiz.... so many problems... no solutions.... especially when your are alone and no ones there to help... haiz... how will u feel if somone says u r impt... but they do not bother about u? how will u feel if somone say that without u his life will nev be happy... but they still feel so happy espicially when u r not there? haiz...
24 Oct 2007
Haiz... chemistry.... one of my best subject... but i screwed up... mind suddenly blank...... haiz...... do u noe how it feels like to see everyone happy.... yet u yourself cannot smile? do u noe how it feels when everybody have somone who loves and cares for them... and yet u yourself is longing for somone to love and care for u? do u noe how it feels when ppl have somone important to them... yet u are separated so far from the person u love so much? haiz... its not my fault i am the way i am now...
23 Oct 2007
Todays paper seems quite ok... think my confidence up again le...
22 Oct 2007
haiz... today will have my first o lev paper.. wonder hows it gona be... no confidence in myself.... haiz... anyway... about this blog... i managed to find a backup all the way till SYF... will restore after my o's... and btw...i think its gods will i del them bah... those sadsad emoemo stuff.... haiz.... from SYF til today... i can onli rmb two things bah... already updated le...
21 Oct 2007
Haiz... All my posts in one big post... accidentally deleted one... so all gone.... haiz... there goes my memories.... U should understand my Stml condition right... now i lose all my memories..... haiz... GG
20 Oct 2007
Haiz... 3 days after official school ends.... kind of miss everyone though.... Although this class still have so many idiots... its a perfect combination to make the whole class go crazy with laughter... especially Chadwick suaning Edwin Lee with his class motto... Be true, Always true... kinda of miss edwin lee joking lesson... Auntie Quek chem lesson was always my fav lesson where u can play with chemicals and stuff... she oso the one who inspired me to go into chemistry next time... and maybe go become a great teacher like her... Alows "serious-joking" lessons oso very fun... His the only teacher capable of making the whole class go crazy everytime... Miss Ah Huat lesson oso... always laughing at his Thumbs... Liang Min lesson oso... and the group of me and lormee and murphy laughing at her english.... Group (Ge-Luo-Bu) She pronounced Ang Mo Kio sec sch as Hong Mao Dan Zong Xue (Rambutan Sec) instead of Hong Mao Qiao Zong Xue Lee Poh Lin lesson was kinda of fun where we usually sit and laugh at each others essays... Howard Tans lessons were always fun when u can suan him and oso fool around in his class..... Lastly Lee Swee Hoon lesson where me Tat Loong and Randy will laugh at Jia Hao.... haiz... so many great times in sch... Suddenly thinking of leaving sch is so... (expressionless) Thinking of separating with your good friends like Clifford, Jeremy, Joseph and Daron... Me and clifford always suaning each other.... Me and Jeremy keep laughing at stupid stuff and anything funny.... Me and Joseph talking about hamsters... Me and Daron laughing at almost everything... Haiz... will miss these great times... Especially band practises.... Although the band now like cmi..... I still miss the times i spend with my juniors and my didis.... With Yisheng toking about games... With Joon laughing at every single thing... With Jonathan poking each other for the fun... With Gideon... Haiz..... Miss my seniors too... Wish that the memories will stay forever in me..... I will nev forget u guys who have always spent time laughing together....
12 Oct 2007
Watched balls of fury with didi... since didi finish exam... think he deserved some hardearned rest bah... so pei him watch? quite funny lar some parts... but the story line wasnt that real.... but since didi enjoy den i oso happy lor... haiz... very long nev smile again... if onli today can last forever...
8 Sept 2007
Haha... I will never forget today de… My didi bdae how can forget lolz =) Well… didi hope we will forever be together.. And we can love each other till we die =p Hope that we will nev forget one another… And may u find your happiness in life =p
6 Sept 2007
Haha... went to celebrate didi's bdae... went to watch 1408.... wasnt scary de... wad horror shit is this? anyway... since didi enjoy then the $ spent is worth... anyway... this is the first time since very long nev smile le.... =) haha... wish can everyday like tt....
17 Apr 2007
Yeh rain-darkprophecies.blogspot.com has been revived!!! well for all my freinds pls relink me can??? I shall be using blogspot again... Erm btw all comment r apreciated ty =p =) =x
15 Apr 2007
Well some ppl may think im seeking attention... well i have to agree im some attention seeking person... however dun wry cos im not those irritating type de... all i juz wan is the attention from my parents... i feel tt they dun understand me enough... they think they love me but i dun feel much... they give me comfort and everything i wan but they did not give me wad i needed most... they keep trying to force me to walk a path i dun wan to... i like the way things r done now... i have so much loving frends...such a lovely dar... but i dun uds y my parents wan to change this... cannot use phone cannot stay with frends cannot this cannot tt... im like gg to be totally cut out from the outside world soon... so if u try to contact me but u cant u shd noe wad my parents did... its like i have to use the phone secretly in the dead of the night so tt they wun noe... i dun mind sacrficing abit of my bedtime so tt i can spend time with ppl i love... i really love my frends alot... i really wan to care for them... but i think tt there is smt stopping me... wad i needed most is my love ones by my side... imagine getting cut off with those u love onli getting to see them once a mth??? its very TIA de lor... haiz.. i hope tt this will stop soon...
14 Apr 2007
Haiz super sianz... thot can slp till 12... stupid got CL listening today... nvm forget abt it... sure fail de... anyway after come bk from sch Joshua call me... ask whther wan go watch Meet the Robinsons... Well duno y i agreed to watch lar... i dun norm go cinema watch such cartoon show de... anyway the show quite interesting and a bit funny bah... expecailly the pre-show... the mickey mouse de =) Spent $10 on arcade playing Datona, Dance dance revolution, time crisis 4, rock fever... aiya spend some money for entertainment dun think will die lar... diao... didi wan me treat him food for cinema??? lolz i dun look like ATM... haiz sianz... went off at 5 cos got church while the rest went play LAN... Gerald's team got trash cos my didi duno how play Dota de lolz... anyway all the pics still with Josh... oh anyway me go play maple le... buaix....
13 Apr 2007
Haiz... me always tio bully de.... sommore tio bully by Juniors... stupid lor tt Jon tan ar..... call me emo... then still make the other sec 1 gang me.... then lata my frend and teachers see le say i bully small kids.... anyway for i have to say im still quite sad about yesterday bah... haiz... actually for those who saw me cry during the trip back.... i actually din cry becos we got bronze... i cried becos i was realy touched by u guys... although u guys were very dissapointed but ur morale was so high tt u could even sing the sch song and the montfortian giant cheer... i was really touched by this motivational spirit tt i cried throughout the whole ride lar.... so xia suay... cry in front of my juniors and seniors.... hahaz... me too emo liao lar... anyway i gtg again tmr stupid listening compre test...
12 Apr 2007
Smiles everyone =) we did our best we will have no regrets... Thank you band for giving me so much happiness and joy for the past few years... Thank you all alumni, teachers and all others for supporting us... And finally thank you Mr. Simen for giving the band so much support... Im so sorry that we couldnt bring tt gold bk for u... Pls dun blame anyone cos everyone did their best.... To everyone else msmmb is juz a bronze band but to me mssmb is already a gold band... MSSMB ROX 4EVER!!! Well enough about syf.... To all my juniors... The sec4s r gg to "xpire" liao. its gona be very soon. but pls remember tt we still love the band and we love u guys very much... we will try to come bk as and when possible... this yr is our impt yr cos we have o levs... but we will definitely come bk to help u... If u guys nid help and if the seniors cant help u, u can always come bk to us.. we will definitely help u... Anything help u nid whether scch work or band u can always come find me... i will sure help de... Jia You mssmb for the Next SYF!!! and since we sec4s r gg liao the sec3s r gona take over us... so pls respect and listen to them kaes??? I wanted to say it juz now but since everyone zao liao got no chance to say.... For all those reading this...pls help to spread to other band members ty.... Well enough of band le lar.... today dinner is song bo... 1 plate fried rice with chick cutlet... 1 whole roasted duck... Roasted meat.... Soup.... eat until dam full.... hahaz... anyway gtg slp le tmr still got sch....
10 Apr 2007
Haiz... guys im not emo... and im not trying to be emo here... well i have to tell u firstly tt im not the happy-go-lucky person tt u always see me as... u may think im feeling happy.. but im not... in me is full of problems and sorrow... im not asking for ppl to respect me... all i juz wan is somone who can understand me... if there is really somone who is out there....
9 Apr 2007
WAh so many events today.... Lala bdae my dad bdae... Tanjong Katong Girls SYF... wa gratz get gold... still pending GYH??? wa very nervous leh 3 more days our turn le.... this few days muz stay bk till 9 pm lor.... anyway i gtg slp le... very tired... couldnt slp last nite.... haiz.... duno y....
6 Mar 2007
haiz... me very exhausted now... too many personal probs.... to all my frends... thank you for all the things tt u have done for me... i aprreciate it very much.... and to those i have hurt im really very sry... i hope tt u can forgive me and we can start afresh again.... i really dun wish to lose even more frends..... in my current position... i think im gg crazy soon.. i scared tt if i dun say wad i nid i may be unable to say it anymore.... i really love all my frends..... i love all the times weve been tru.... the laughters and joys... even helping to share ur sorrow.... i really hope tt we can be toghether till the end of life.... pls forgive me for the times i have hurt u....im really sry....really sry...
5 Mar 2007
Haiz... to those who ask about y i love soft toys so much... i shall ans ur qn... well to be honest i have very little friends... im like a loner.... dun ask me y but i think im destined to have little friends... all i wan is somone who understand and cares for me... since i have no one to share my probs with i turn these soft cuddlies instead... although i cant get a reply from them, but at least i have "someone" to share my prob with... at least i do not have to bottle up my probs... yes i do have probs but i have more probs than u think i have.... i cant really tell out cos i dun noe who i can trust... at least i noe these bears are trustworthy... No im not flirting around with my juniors at all...pls dun get the wrong idea... im juz finding somone to tok to... i really nid somone who i can rely on... i duno when this person may pop up... maybe i failed to realise tt this person may be already beside me... maybe i have yet to meet this person... all i juz hope is tt i can find this person soon... if not, even the warmest of light will be unable to fill up the coldness...
5 Mar 2007
Haiz... still owe somone a bdae present...so sry cant give u on time... me still trying to do now... hahaz... ppl hand still pain lar... cant do too fast... duno which idiot band me during PE lesson... nvm... i shall finish asap...
4 Mar 2007
haiz has my candle extinguished again??? y suddenly so dark de??? haiz... do u hate me??? do u really hate me so much??? haiz... duno y hand suddenly so numb now... cant type any longer... will cont tmr...
31 Mar 2007
Wa lao so tired... juz reached home lor.... today whole day outside... Morn went band xchange with whitley sec... made many new friends... reach sch at about 1+... went hg mall eat then went home bathe... then rush out to serangoon mrt to wait for my didi and benjamin teo... stupid didi lor... say meet at 3 then he himself come late... he say benjamin waiting outside barrier for him... then benjamin is beside me at the plaform lor lolz... diao we went PS...cos of didi i webt to help him "fish" 1 bear... then after $6 not even a single thing lor... Benjamin spent like close to $15 on his stacker game...then didi spend $6 total spent is $27 and we get onli like 1 puny 3.5 inch pooh bear... diao... mr bean is so sickening funny lar... haiz... wished tt somone was there with me... well... spent 1 hr looking for food... finally resided in Mac... eateat laughlaugh until benjamin din noe curry was dripping on his shirt...lmao... well nvm bk to making somones bdae prsent le... its about half done though... juz bought new materials... hahaz =p
27 Mar 2007
Sianz... tao tia dou tia everywheer tia...onli xim boi tia... sian... my head really very dizzy now... i very stressed out lar... anyone got any suggestions? well anyway im really tired liao... and still quite pissed off becos of yesterday...
26 Mar 2007
OMG!!! im so pissed off today!!!! y cant ppl juz do wad they r supposed to??? y always muz scream at them then they care??? f*** them @ssh0les!!! u think im trying to be funny ar? u think i wan collect band fund de isit??? u think i like to pump ppl or scold ppl ar? NO!!! i onli did wad im supposed to and if u giv me hell i will giv hell bk!!!
23 Mar 2007
Happy Bdae to Timmi!!! hahaz... was on phone last nite till 0000hrs to wish him lolz... Tc urself and may wadever u r doing go easy and smooth!!! today din go for uniform group program cos under MC.. Aloysius Low say shouldnt even come to sch at all lolz... i say flu and cough cannot have physical stuff but can learn mar.. then Simen lourds today cook curry for whole sch... its nice dao xiao lor... so spicy until i wan eat more lor... hahaz... anyway i gtg le bb....
21 Mar 2007
Sianz 0.5... i juz blog 5 min ago...i walk out to living room... kick the curb= nice toe... bleeding and swollen... nice toe lar...
21 Mar 2007
Well after a talk with somone my "pissed off" finally cooled down... then after that my mum went to my room and started scolding... say i use phone use too much study study so little... lol she din noe that i couldnt study thats y i try to look for people to talk... looks like my parents still nid to catch up with me wor... aiya after hering her nagg, i suddenly realised how worried my parents were because of something... after reassuring them then everything mei shi le... Ps cant quote any parts of the talk as i dun feel like telling anyone bah... well i oso realised that my parents actually love me much more than i think... think that we lack much understanding bah... haiz...gtg study le...cant fail my tests again...for tt someone i shall pass all my tests!!!
20 Mar 2007
Haiz still very pissed today... now still looking for someone to talk to... Duno wad to do now lar... Who shd I call xia??? Nvm i try finish hw then go call..Nev do my hw for 1 week le... Sianz today take back class test another failure and the other juz pass... Hmph maybe lack of study bah... but this few days no mood study... Nvm... for somones sake i muz study hard for O levs =p
19 Mar 2007
haiz things r getting worse for me.... dun even noe wad may happen next... go problems come one after another... but the person who caused all this? always my fault suan le dun wan say anything le... go band help out during holidays, juz open stand from cover, stand pai, she wan me pay. no big deal but muz say until like my fault ar? ur stand sux ownself pai oso my fault band members dun wan pay band fund i chase them they keep dun wan bring oso my fault... ms ong toking to me after band mum cannot find me... come home nev ask jiu start scolding... my fault again ar??? nvm.... always my fault de... im not trying say everything not my fault... yes some of them may be my fault but im so pissed tt everything get pushed to me!!! haiz.. nvm i now so LL... go slp le bb
18 Mar 2007
Haiz... i feel something missing in my life... duno lar... keep thinking of tt thing.... the more i think the more tired i become... haiz... scared of losing it.... haiz... if onli time can stop here forever... if onli we can remain together forever... i juz nid u too much....
18 Mar 2007
So sry to all those who asked me to go out... My parents juz wouldnt let me go out... Say must finish all my TYS then can... So sry for PSing u all... For those who saw me at HG mall yesterday i was there studing with my friend lar not slacking lolz... Hmmph today PR birthday... got KFC for lunch... sianz no ice cream cake... not fun.... now is rotting at home le... laopei go overseas again.. haha now can freely use phone le...
13 Mar 2007
who r u? u talk like me n sound like me... like same things...(archery,bowling)same favourites... eat same food...(no prawn,no crab,no vege) hate same things(foot drill,sports) and they say he llok like me... who r u??? r u my conscience??? or r u my shadow??? yesterday play rakion oso lev at same time... juz who the hell r u??? y r u shadowing me???
4 Mar 2007
Well very sian juz came bk from tuition.... head still spinning.... well since so many ppl still keep asking me wad i mean by my msn nicks and my blog... i shall simplify further by using this maths equation... for a simple straight line graph, Y=MX+C let Y= eternal happiness; X= Me; C= understanding Find gradient.......after u find M u will noe wad i want....i say like tt very obvious le... More clues: look at my past msn nicks..... Where is my light??? Im feeling so cold, wheres my flame that lights my heart.... Y?Y does no one understands me... So dun ask me more...i wun say liao..too obvious..if not i would have already gave direct ans liao..
1 Mar 2007
Haiz... juz wan thk somone u all say until i tio ditch.....haiz... guess u guys still dun understand me..... im juz feeling cold... wheres my warmth??? where is the flame of my life??? i shall perish with darkness and frost....
27 Feb 2007
I feel so tired...really very tired... im juz sick of studying so hard yet fail my tests... im juz sick of ppl calling me names or saying bad things everywhere I go for these 10 yrs...when can these nightmare stops??? Is there really no one who can understand me??? Is there no one whom I can share my troubles with??? In this blog I would like to thank someone, this special someone who brought hope and light to me... ever since I met that person...my life have changed... without the person I think I wouldn’t be sitting here today... I would have been in heaven by now…I shant tell who this person is... but tt person would always be in my heart forever... thank you very much for helping me in times of difficulties... thank you for giving me a chance to live on... thank you for listening and sharing my worries and troubles... thank you for bringing happiness in my life... and lastly thank you for everything u have done for me... i love u so much...im so sry I couldn’t do much to help u although u have done so much for me... I feel so terrible...u may think I have not felt ur kindness... but in fact u are the first one to melt my heart... u have helped me here and there in my life... u practically cause all my happiness in life... thank you very much for everything u do... if there is really something I can do for u... i will gladly try my best to help... if I have caused any misery or hurt to u I would like to apologise in front of everyone... if u think u r nth but juz 1 friend of mine I would like to say tt u r wrong... Im someone in this world who does not have many friends... i think tt friends r those who can support me and understand me in my life... if u still think u r juz 1 person to the world…let me tell u tt u are the world to me... thank you to all my other frendz who have oso helped me one way or another in my life... without u I would never have been wad I am today... lastly im not sure if I can be with u for long... there is always one day when everyone will have to leave one another... but I would like to tell u tt wadever happens u will always be tt special someone in my heart... and no one can replace this position away from u... thank you for everything and I love u...
19 Feb 2007
Yeah!!!! today went didi hse do 3rd job haha!!! now chief dit le yeh!!!haapy assaultling...
18 Feb 2007
Happy CNY to all!!! Argh!!! my didi hai me die lor...ask me go bain...diu..... lol...so pissed my safety charm went missing...poor 5%.... well today nth much won onli $2 in gambling...
16 Feb 2007
today sch end at 12.... went vivo with joshua gary they all...watch juz follow law... well make so many new friends haha.. met joseph teo fu yuan...banjamin... anyway quite fun lar...
10 Feb 2007
very long nev play maple le lar so today go play a while lor... my didi actually wan go hunt rose with me de... den hunt halfway sianz so we go werewolf... lol i tio dc then his MG just gone then wolf slash him den tiu.... lol....he about to lev up le so suay... well my ice lighting finally lev up le haha....
9 Feb 2007
Song bo today simen lourdes crazy let us go home at 1130..... me and my 2 didis actually wan go bowling then duno y the glassroot bowling close... so we play arcade lor so cheap 40cents 1 game... aiya i treat them lor....play datona metal slug time crisis so fun....then later i cheong back sch go see the o lev results.... well then went to dinner(can call lunch cos i din eat lunch) with them lar...
5 Feb 2007
OMG of all ppl choose Gideon as my assisstant treasuere??? wth!!!! i collecting money for band fund then suddenly ms ong say Gideon from now on u r officially the assisstant treasurer omg!!! of all ppl y must him... then got ppl xtra say duno wad couples doing same job lol.... wth!!!! aiya me and other didi doing hw together haha... then he asking qn on msn lol.... nvm i really nid go slp le lol...very tired byes...
4 Jan 2007
haiz...my whole "family" like sick lor...Me still sick... got flu cough headache Haiz sry dar din mean to pass u my sickness oso.... my 2 didi oso sick...Joon tong tio stomach flu Gideon now no voice.... Argh now i noe y i tio stomach flu 2 weeks ago... My didi tio stomach flu now cos he finish medication then come again... He told me 2 weeks ago he have le...wth no wonder i tio!!! i share flute with him argh!!! Well i not blaming him lar...not his fault he oso duno mar... well TC everyone.... Anyway today my cousin bdae...and his present from GOD??? a fall from his bike... injured everywhere helmet crash...lol....he was avoiding on coming car... anyway me gg to his bdae party le bb...
3 Jan 2007
Well today i found new didi..he is my junior Joon Tong this yr sec 1 oso play flute de... Well..we were smsing each other when run out of smses so we call lor.. toktok about ourself lar...can call socialising bah... today went help out with band....wah can die xia...the sec 1 so noisy and idiotic lor... then we have a "icebreaker" soccer and captain ball... sian pants split...embarrassing heng no one see... thought me a lesson dun play with long pants.... call laopei fetch me shorts lor...
31 Jan 2007
lol...me sick, didi sick...lol.... Haiz....really cant slp lor...woke up in middle of night.... duno y this few days like tt....
30 Jan 2007
My valentine gift from GOD....fever...throat pain....cough....flu....headache....haiz.....love sick!!!! Well this few nights cant slp well...as usual kept by some things so cant slp haiz....been feeling very tired in sch and i always wake up so alte this few days... well...wad can i do??? as usual i can do nthing....haiz....
27 Jan 2007
Argh!!!! y u all like to bully my didi and my dar de!!!! haiz...sry.... ur dar and korkor very useless cant help u :'(.... argh!!!! u all wan find somone bully then find me lar... leave my love ones alone!!!! y am i so useless??? y cant i do something???? PLS LEAVE them alone!!if i ever hear u bully them again u WILL GET IT FROM ME!! Didi , dar, anyone bully u tell me i will make them PAY!!!!
27 Jan 2007
Wah!!! Last time loggout lev 68 now loggin checkcheck lev 70 liao!!!! So many zombie tooth ar!!! Think can do xchange quest till xia ar!!! Anyway thks to whoever who played for me...TY.....Anyway life still as sucky.. Mon have Amaths and geog test...muz study...ok le i go off bb
21 Jan 2007 Today celebrate jiejie bdae...lol ask us meet at 11am I waited 30 min then they come...well went kbox till 5pm...go esplanade walkwalk... tim so sry bout ur stomach and hand well i last night guessed tt something will happen... haiz as usual guess was right... Haiz...Today no mood lar... walk home feel so light... cos i found out my heart went missing...nvm i not saying out...personal matters In MRT gg home my heart is like <\3 to 100 pieces...reach home is 1mil pieces... Haiz sim tia(if i have 1 which i dun hae le) read Tims blog... Haiz...when my friends are hurt i can feel it de... how can i do nth and watch my close friends get hurt...But what can i do??? Haiz... Me so useless and dumb...Yang wo zhang da shi mei yong de laopei laobu lang fei le li qi... Cant even help my friends...me so useless... Tim ar pls stop doing this can??? Talk to me if there is any problem dun bottle everything up...like tt very ez chibaboom de leh... PLS stop saying u wan die lar... if u die me how??? i cant live without friends... "y do we treasure things when they are gone" well this is human nature... this is humans most dagerous and most impulsive habit...this is y humans muz try to treasure things when we have them and not take anything for granted... as i am trying to treasure all my friends and all my love ones... pls treasure urs too and UR LIFE... we onli have 1 life after it is gone we cant take it bk... try to benefit from life and do the happy things rather then think about the past and hate ur life (i am once like tt...i noe wad it feels like...tts y i try to forget my bad pasts so tt it will not affect those around me...hope u will do tt too...) u shd noe wad my past is about...i dun like to talk about it... if u really wan to be happy... i suggest u leave all ur unhappiness and start a new life... i noe tt ur life is not tt gd...but if wan to forget the past make an effort to do so... tts y i dun talk about anything tt is gone le...be it exams or anything personal... wads gone is gone... we cant do anything to change the past... but we can do smt to change the future and the present... pls think about wad i have juz said... hope it helps u with ur life... I am easily affected by things and ppl around me leh...pls stop this.. i cant take it anymore... PS i muz stop le...My keyboard gg shock tian le... (water conduct electricity...so does tears...) I MUZ DO SMT!!! I CANT LET MY LOVE ONES GO ON LIKE TT!!! IF THERE IS SMT I CAN DO PLS SAY :( AND PLS TAKE CARE OF URSELF...NICE STOMACH AGAIN...
19 Jan 2007
Happy Bdae Daphne jiejie!!! oh the PPC i pass u on SUN bah cant pass to u now...
15 Jan 2007
Well today i juz spawn in maple then got this someone call firecleric ask me if to cc...lame...nvm lor i go there well no harm trying... he then ask darrkshadow if i got bf...i knew wad he wanted... i said no(its the truth anyway i broke up long ago)...as usual guess right...he wan me be his gf... lev 100 not bad lar...but i rejected... well so many ppl ask me y but i guess im not into relationships... every 3 mths 1 break...cant go on like this lar... well life is like this and like that lor...see what cloud float to what cloud lor...
4th Jan
Well ppl cant blog everytime le but will try on every Weekend bye!!!
6 Jan 2007
Well today i felt like the happiest day of my life xia!!! Woke up about 330am? dar sms me say wan tok then we tok till 430am well wadever lar Me and dear back again!!!WEll so happy until last night sleep until so SWEET =p well hen kai xin jui shi le!!! hope today lasts forever!!! Love u dar 1314 MUAKX!!!
31 Dec 2006 to 01 Jan 2007
Today got so much fun got countdown but we did it in maple haha. Well helping ahma to finish her quest and lev up. brought deardear somewhere and well went to buy "act cute shirts" went heneseys act noob haha today was the happiest day of my life xia. hope everyday was like that. slept so peacefully and woke up at about 1030?? well gg watch night in the museum le bb. Oh ya b4 i forget HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!!!
30 Dec 2006
Happy bdae Aaron haha. well today woke up at 1Pm well duno lar last few nights nev slp much too much fun in chalet.well chalet pics haven been uploaded yet well if time permits i will do so. quarreled with PR again. i told him " If you think u r smart then there will be no more dumb people in the world. afterall u r the dumbest of them all =p" Go read ppls blog... Doing Garys "quiz" from his archives nstructions :name 20 ppl you cn think of at the top of ur head. don't read the qns below before you write 1.Timothy 2.Joshua 3.Weeong 4.Rainald(Never say me cannot mar) 5.Gavilan 6.Edward 7.Gary 8.Clifford 9.Joseph Koh 10.Ray 11.Gideon 12.Ryan Louis Lee 13.Gerald 14.Kenneth Cheng 15.Aaron Tan 16.Ivan Ng 17.Daphne 18.Gek Teng(Lala) 19.Peck Yi Ming 20.Marcus Tan
what would you do if you never meet 1? -My life would never have been So happy and meaningful
what would you do if 20 and 9 dated? -OMG Wtf cant think of tt
did you ever like 3? -Wth maybe maybe not duno dun wan ans lame qn
would 6 and 17 make a gd couple? -Well Maybe come to think of it like can leh
describe 3. -Cute Shuai vry frendly fun but sometimes very violent??
do you think 8 is attractive ?- Lol attractive meaning?. Well can say shuai oso but i not interested no thks
something about 7.- Always Smiles :) keep the good work
do you know any of 12's family members ? - Never knew any of his family
what's 18's fav ?- Erm not sure but i got feeling it is food and one of them is Seafood!!!
what would you do if 11 confesses that he/she likes you ? -Wth duno leh not sure
what language does 15 speak ?- Singlish, Chinese, and lastly Rubbish!!!
who is 9 going out with ?- Lol i not ji ja puo i dun pry into ppls private stuff
how old is 16 now ?- 14
when was the last time you talk to 13 ?- 29 Dec 2006
would you date 11 ?- Wth y so many stupid qn de???
would you ever be in a serious relationship with 11 ?- Wth lame Qn dun which to ans
what sch does 3 go to ?- Montfort Sec Lar
where does 6 live ?- Somewhere in Hougang i think
Whats ur favourite thing about 5 ?- Do everything oso gd play flute play o2 play maple
have you seen 1 naked ?- Hmph think not lar lol another lame qn
29 Dec 2006
First to wake up see clock 1015 Wth 1000 muz leave chalet leh... Woke everyone well packpack go home...On com onli to find maple down so playplay Dota...
28 Dec 2006
Suppose to go Escape Theme Park well everyone still sleeping how go !2 noon le leh...stay in chalet lor... Tio rape in room by korkor so pain and tired ant HOT!!!... rain stop Walk out chalet rain liao no umbrella me korkor Pecky Beaver and Lala tio dreanched Haiz nvm la qi kui let ppl see sexy body cos i wearing white ...Well not much lar play Datona...Dance in "freezer" with jiejie and Lala Sneak in play Pool...Went night swim... Weeong tio bully again...Me tio bully by weeong oso in pool Play Taidi till 3am call Mac 4am went back sleep found bloster and Pillow loss again... This time too tired lar then koon
27 Dec 2006
Morn wake up call Mac delivery Weeong sleeping like a log... Found his leg at my **** tried to wake him dun wan then i help him pay and order lor..Eat le me and Weeong went sleep again then woke up found Gavilan And Hanwen taking pic of me and Weeong... Joseph came and brought DVD.Wth Eragon!!!!juz watched yesterday!!! Well bbq again...tonight Bolster and pillow got stolen by Gavi... Cant sleep...
26 Dec 2006
Finally the day has come.Juz finished packing bag in the morning... Went watch Eragon, Went Lan play dota... Went home bathe getting ready to go chalet.. Dad saw 4 bags of chalet stuff Chua dio say too many bags so i took his luggage and stuffed all my thing in.. Drank 40% then whole night so high. duno what happened onli remember Suppose to sleep with Sec 4s then SOME ppl ask me go other room.No choice join Sec2s... Cant slp whole night stupid WeeOng korkor hug so tight my whole leg numb cant move...Haiz very hot xia... Actually room very peaceful den Shermann duno y come in then so squeezy tried to steal my pillow and bolster(pillow and bolster refer to Weeong)
25 Dec 2006
Happy Xmas everyone!!! well midnight me Tim and Lala took SS at happyville.upload pics anoother time again. Tim tio Dc then whole xmas tree gone muz redo again... Went Daphne jiejie chalet for bbq dinner. Din eat much wasnt hungry anyway.Met Isabell jiejie(daphne guild Ldr) well nth much juz as ordinary xmas as the others accept that Timothy very happy cos he tio 20K xmas edition PPC
17 Dec 2006
Haiz today deardear angry with me :'(haiz. misunderstanding again.. always tio misunderstood by everyone de..i juz said faker then deardear thot i scold f***er..Haiz..ok lar all my fault ok.. Haiz problems after problems..1st 1 haven solve 2nd 1 appear haiz.. dear dun angry le lar..haiz tonight cant slp again le.. Juz uploaded 1% of the pics i took in Disneyworld. purposely uploaded first to make my cousin pissed off haha Disney pics this way =>cu73 p1c5
17 Dec 2006
hmph today nth to do. change hotel le so got internet haha. hmph muz pack stuff tmr fly bk singapore le...well anyway gtg slp tmr morn flight buaix cya on 20th Dec 2006 0030hr (+8 gmt)...
17 Dec 2006
Sry dear me here bo internet cant msn you. So sry? Anyway today me went to see Niagara falls haha. Woke up too late haha. Muz have dreamt too much LOL? Anyway the Scenery very nice here haha hope u guys can enjoy it too so I took many pics. Lol. PS cant upload pics no internet?Me now typing blog in Microsoft words lar so next time EZ transfer to blog haha?Anyway dear dunnit worry about me lar here not that cold got enough warm clothes so I quite ok. Hmm me at Canada side of Falls so after woke up go Lunch go taketake pics then went to USA side? So cool got double rainbow (can see easily from the pics)? Go USA walkwalk buybuy shopshop eateat then come bk hotel le? Went swim(eeeew no chio bu to see de all so phui)? Went starbucks?then koon le haha?
16 Dec 2006
Today fly from Florida to Toronto…Sian plane again? 2 planes to reach sommore?sian leg pain back pain? haiz?took 1 hr for me to reach hotel.. by the time is evening le. Went down to seesee Niagara Falls.. cool so nice got lighting sommore and even got firework. Wow such a gd welcome haha lol…anyway very tired and pain so went to slpzzzz
14 & 15 Dec 2006
Well since got 2 more day passes so went bk to Disney well went to take those nice rides and went bk to those nev sit de. well took alot pic again... Aiya dar dun angry loe lar calm dwn ok? i coming bk SG very soon le....
13 Dec 2006
well finish with all 4 Diseny theme park le. well went to Universal Studios. so fun .well as usual sit roller coastals alone... well quite fun lar at least better than Disney..
12 Dec 2006
well since weekday le so return to themepark went Disney MGM studio...
10 & 11 Dec 2006
Since this two days are weekends in America so cant go themeparks sure lagg like xiao (PS play too much maple i mean jamm with ppl) so i went to FOS (F ull Of Shit??? haha no lar its Factory Outlet Store oh ya launch postponed to today so we went there tonight to test our luck. haha today hengheng launch well the feling dam song lor.. haha can go see video in my blog... pls go here =>watch the video of space shuttle discovery lanuch pictures not yet uploaded should be done anytime. pls send me email to comment about the video. thks
9 Dec 2006
Went Kennedy Space station today seesee. haha coincidence today is launch day for Space Shuttle Discovery tyco haha. Sian all queue so long so many ppl come see launch... Wth wait until 9pm and last 5 min b4 launch u tell me launch cancelled becos of wind??? wth... traffic jammm zzzz reach hotel 2am koon....
6 to 8 Dec 2006
Enjoying myself in Disney world well went to magic kingdom Epcot centre and Animal kingdom. well quite fun yet quite boring..most of things for Gina.. well took many photos(i will post on blog later on bah)... PS cant buy disney toys lar so EXXXX.Well Still having jetlag... food sux everytime eat burger...
6 Dec 2006
Reach America le?Not that cold…OMG luggage lost no more winter clothes…Lol?anyway here got free broadband can msn and blog haha…Haiz me now very tired go koon le buaix.
5 Dec 2006
Wa like tt onli few ppl wish me happy bdae de. lol... anyway on plane so sian. hmph having jet lag. well i reach Orlando at morn(SG time) well Florida time in 4 dec nite. haha long bdae i have. well celebrated with my family and my relatives on video conference??? well kk from now on i still stick to SG time and date lar so dunnit confuse everyone.
3 Dec 2006
Well said BB to all my friends... gg off tmr 6am.. haiz dar dun sad le lar.. i come bk very fast de lar. dun cry..
24 Nov 2006
Today go Suntec for Scvenger hunt. so Suay Tim and Gavi split up if not sure very fun.Well Tim foloed me group. Haha Tim sure knows the way round Orchard area (sure go there alot times de)thks to Gary i could finish this part 1. Get receipts that total up to $15.25 (Completed. coffee + Rainald's MosShake and Gary Apple Pie from PS's Mos Burger)
2. Collect 20 different flyers (Completed. We took them whenever we passed by any shops)
3. Find a hair that is 20cm in length and take a picture with the person whom you obtained the hair from (Completed. Rainald went and asked the lady at HSBC. Picture was taken with Rainald) i think my group is the only group that finished this
4. Get 5 GV tickets with different movie titles (Completed. Timothy, Gerald, and Joshua went to PS's GV and asked the ticketing guy there)
5. Find a 10 cent coin that was made in 1971 (Failed. Can't find)
6. Get a HSBC Credit Card application form (Completed. We just took from the shop/whatever thing its called)
7. Find 3 paper cups from Starbucks Cafe (Completed. Timothy went to take from Suntec City's Starbucks)
8. Find 6 ice-blended coffee cup from Coffee Bean (Completed. Timothy, Gideon, Gerald, and Rainald bought drinks from there. Then we asked for two more cups,lol)
9. Get a Mos Burger serviette with a lady's lip print on it (Completed.Rainald used McDonald's chilli sauce at did it himself)
10. Go to the cold storage at Takashimaya and search for food items beginning with each letter of the alphabet. List them down on a paper and record the price for each item (Completed)
11. Get a paper bag from Pop Doh (Completed. Found at Taka's food court area. Gerald bought some bread from there, but they didn't have paper bags, so we just got a Taka bag. Mrs Tan accepted it)
12. Collect 20 bottle caps (Failed.Waste time one, 1 point only)
13. Find a chocolate bar wrapper (Completed. Timothy bought a chocolate bar from Millenia Walk's Candy Empire)
14. Find a paper bag (Completed. We used Coffee Bean's paper bag)
15. Collect 10 satay sticks (Completed. Bought a packet of satay sticks from PS's Carrefour)
16. Find a Y-shaped twig (Completed. Found during the walk to Parliament house)
17. Find a French fry that is 8.5 in length (Completed. Found at Singapore River's McDonalds with Joshua's large-sized fries)
18. Find this picture(gona upload another day) and take a photo of it with the group
19. Locate a circular sculpture that can undergo slimming when viewed from a different angle. Take a candid group photo with the sculpture (Failed. Rainald Knew where it was but forgot how walk there)
20. Find a pillar sculpture that is made up of 100 pieces of marble, each measuring 16cmx140cmx140cm. The marbles are arranged as a stack that spirals upwards. The angle of rotation for each square is 3.6 degrees. (Completed. We completed this along with task No. 8. When we sat inside Coffee Bean drinking, we saw the sculpture from the window, lucky us) 21. Find the Merlion and take a photo that depicts the group leader 'spitting' water from his mouth. (Completed. Took a picture of Rainald spitting water. Gideon was under him drinking the water as a bonus)
22. Find a serviette from the Top of the M restaurant. (Failed. It was closed and they say that they dun have any serveiites at all)
23. Take a group photo with e following landmarks as the background Esplanade CHIJMES Istana Parliament House
Statue of Sir Stamford Raffles (Completed. I tell you ah, this is the most tiring task la. We walked like 20km around town)
24. Take a picture of one of your members riding on the I-Gallop (Completed. The kind staff at Millenia Walk's OSIM let us take a picture of Gideon on the I-Gallop)
25. Find the Bah Kut Teh store at Boat Quay and take a group photo with the signboard as the background. (Completed. We only found this after like 2 big circles around the riverwalk area)
26. Get the latest pamphlet of the Singtel mobile phone offer (Completed. Found this at plaza singapura)
27. Get the price of the Marriott Gold Rewards Card (Passed Rainald and Gideon went thru the Storm to ask the people)
28. Take a 30 second video of the group singing a Christmas song in front of a big Christmas Tree with decorated with many stars (Failed. No time to sing)
29. Find out the price of Don's black pepper chicken pie (Completed. Found this at Suntec City)
30. Locate Mrs Cassandra Tan's car. (Failed. It was parked at her home) this task so lame lor
lol in the end we all got late. Stupid taxi cant find de. call taxi oso so slow. then taxi driver drive like xiao almost Kaboom!!! Me and Gideon so kia then we sat there mana burn hearing the drvier point mid finger and scold f*** CB KNN wa lao. so vulgar xia
23 Nov 2006
Haha today band camp. lol so suay me and Gideon in same group lol. oso got Joshua Gary and Gerald (haha G&G twins lol). well alot of fun.Me group leader then Timothy and Gavi folo my group during the first nite's night walk.then some KPL complain we take MRT cos no sweat.Lol of cos lar ppl slowlyslowly walk mar kan cheonng for wad manman lai lar. Oh ya forgot to say we visited Ang Mo Kio sec for band xchange. Whitley sec oso there. lol.All like so Pro..
Nov 2006
Well i just got to know my jiejie and met her haha. 1 whole group of ppl go Gavi hse lol. Me tim ahma jiejie marcus alien....i think tts all cant really rmg le. well go there see Gavi Levling up... see jiejie died twice...playplay with Yuki(Gavi's dog)...
17 Jun 2006
well today I go Genting Gideon went Melaca. well lost in touch first next few days.... Omg saw KPL at Genting with his family
16 Jun 2006
Well today Montfiesta 9 haiz duno y so nervous haha shd be becos first time playing solo bah. then i start shivering then Gideon was the one who tell me dun worry... then we spend whole day after rehearsal and before concert talking together. well the whole day kinda fun bah. chatting... eating... well until at night, i tio thrown inside the pond outside Victoria Concert Hall. haiz phone pai wth my first phone!!! 6 mths then pai le.
15 Jun 2006
Tonight we all meet in maple again Ludibrium just came out so the 3 of us went there explore. well i wanted make sommone jealous so... gave Gideon 1 Kfan. then both of us using. Malgene fell for the trick haha. well looking for maple bf (cos darrkshadow is gal) so i ask Gideon if he can be my maple bf. well he agreed. stupid Malgene keep calling us g**. i threaten him i gona kill him tmr then he stop lol. then he threaten bk gona bully Gideon tmr so i say if he dare i gona kill him. lol as usual dumb ass fell for trick again. haiz then Malgene go slp me and Gideon climb dwn EOS tower then climb up again. then we go peach Island take wedding pic(haha like very early hor juz knew each ther few days onli)...zzzz
Jun 2006
Next day go band straight away go scold them for making me wait. haiz excuses.. parents dun let them play... haiz ok lor tonight meet again. tonight me and Gideon on9 first. well chat alot whoile waiting for Malgene. in the end he so late then on9. hhmph....
Jun 2006
Well as usual duno y everytime half yr gone then mingle with sec 1s. this time i overheard two juniors talking about MapleStory (sry but they were talking so loud tt so many ppl can hear). the first one is Gideon the other is Malgene. duno wad they quarreling about. forgot le STML again. well i joined there sitting ith them talking about maple. well we decided to meet on maple to KS each other see who better. haiz whole nite those two stupid idiots make me wait whole nite they nev go on9.....
May 2006
hmph wierd from then on duno y everyday on the phone with tim. talking about sch work and band stuff hmph.
May 2006
well studying for SS and history when suddenly very hard to study. tried to reduce stress by calling ppl. first 1 in mind is timothy. haha got ppl talk and oso got ppl teach on phone haha.
03 Jan 2006
Wth 3 yrs gone le now Sec 3. hmph wearing long pants le. haha omg the class timetable so long.... hw list oso so long.... hmph finally me cliford and daron reunited in same class le hor? haha. haiz too bad jin kiat din go 3E1 with us.
Dec 2005
well again i celebrated me bdae overseas. this time go korea. wow din noe skiing was so fun yet tiring. well Lotte world was fun. missed everland cos plane arrived late. haiz
Jul 2005
Well out of a sudden Timothy and me started talking after Montfiesta. Humans r wierd...zzzz
Jun 2005
Well i dun talk to my juniors until the band camp. well tts y band camp r the best time when everyone can build friendship u know. well i met a guy name Neo Wee Ong. chatted a bit talked about Pri sch, band stuff etc. well got along quite well. he later became my korkor... anyway he younger than me 1 mth onli to me doesnt make much diff anyway. after kenneth cheng's batch left, gavilan took over as band major while Peck yi ming became drum major. well anyway they r gd choices too. erm friendship with timothy like started to get worse. dun talk much le. haiz it salmost like losing another friend le. haiz so many setbacks in so short time. well to tell u the truth the onli sec 3 i knew were jin bin and timothy. well so since jin bin very quiet and tim like nev talk to me liao so i went and tried to make new friends. well anyway it succeded if not till today i would onli know tim jin bin and wee ong.
Jan 2005
Hmmph new teacher. Low Siew Leng... teach since. well she doesnt teach well like ppl to copy everything from her powerpoint slide. wads the oint of copying when its is all in the textbook? wierd teacher but quite kind. well dun judge a book by its cover. she may well look like a bulldog tts what ppl use to call her but she is actually very kind u know. well its just not very nice to bully a teacher u noe. she took so much time to prepare those slides so we should be aprreciative...
04 Jan 2005
Well lesons became longer but more intresting. Homeworks increse X2. well recess suddenly more dull. friends from sec 1 still hanging together haha. but seniors time slot now change so cant talk to them le.
03 Jan 2005
A fresh new year again. haiz miss my friends during the holiday. well sometimes still get to talk or even find them on9 on Neopets???? lol as usual today intro stuff again.... this year they jumble everyone into diff classes me go 2E3. wth this class sux got some stupid ppl like Sooria Mathhew Koh Jonathan Koh Aloysius Lee. wth so noisy and chaotic. well dun mix around with ppl like them so not many new friends,onli got harold lewellyn sydney roy?? this year like losing friends haiz. all split into diff classes. well lucky got clifford and jinkiat in my class. well still gd friends.
Year 2004
Well the other events i really cant remember liao all very sian de lar. if i ever remember then i put in lor. haha STML trouble. anyway for te whole year life was the same routine mon to fri sch sat sun rest well always like tt. even sch is like regular lol. but still remember got 3rd in whole lev though
Jan 2004
Well band prac during holidays= no rest haiz... anyway Kenneth became Band Major so SL post gift to Gerald Chan. Drum major is Wilson Lin. well congratz...
XX DEC 2003
Go bintan well quite fun lar. anyway onli few days haha. wa after a few days i reach singpore tsunami strike wth so mny ppl die so scary xia.
XX Jan 2004
Well after the first day in band well, time to hit school again. Sec 1 life was like so cool, more freedom and not much homework haha. well since pri sch i always hated to go to sch. but suddenly my mindset changed. from then on i always looed forward to the fun in school especailly recess where i can interect with my peers. usually after light refreshments, me and my usual group of friends, clifford, daron, hwee xiang, tze chuan( smart ass) and derek etc,etc, we always hanged together to play games, chaptek, soccer, gay catching? (the last one being catcher b4 bell rings will be the gay for the day. well most of the times it is derek(piggy). haha cant run so no wonder.... well sometimes on alternate days i hang out with my seniors from band. well should say senior as i only knew timothy kwa. lol haha he is a good senior though. very friendly and very shuai oso. No i dun have a weakness for guys WTH!!! i say ppl shuai cannot ar??? haiz some ppl jealous isit??? well recess for the whole year wad like this
XX Jan 2004
Paiseh as u already know i suffer from STML its no surprise i always forget the dates (tts y i dun do well in history) however my heart tells me it is one of the saturdays. Well anyway on to cut the long story short, on tt day is the first day of band. well as usaul choosing of instruments... hhmh well this year we were allowed to choose the instruments we like to go. but "judges" decisions r final. well i dun have much knowledge about music but i have always yearned to learn to play the flute since young. so i decided to test my luk. b4 i ever step into the foyer, well i actually told God that if i do not get into flute section, i would quit band. haha. well fortunately or unfortunately to SOME PPL,... anyway arent i still in band? so u should know wad happened =p haha. kaes as some ppl requested i shall retell the story. erm surprisingly i can still keep some memories un"brainwashed" well on the first day all recruits were separated into groups well lucky for me my group visited the flute section first, haha so since i am the onli person in my group interested in flute so happy me sitting there 10 min listening to Kenneth. well i tried playing the flute. hhpmp u can still call me a noob then (well now still a noob compared to kenneth then). well i still rememebered him saying that he saw some talent in me and asked if i wanted to join flute. so there i am now... still in band haha.another sec 1 Qing Long entered flute. then some xtras bought a flute just to make Mr. Ng Eng Kee let him go flute. well duno y Qing Long got kicked out of flute in June
10 Jan 2004
Hehe today is choosing our CCA. i wanted to get into choir badly but haiz my dad say i should go into band no harm trying at least if i dun like it i can still quit. but well i have long forgotten about quitting le.
XX Jan 2004
Not sure about precise date but on tt day i met a new friend Clifford. well he kinda cute but very fun to play with and talk to. He's now my best friend though.
05 Jan 2004
Well today is the first day of lessons haha. well as usual first days no homework all about intro and stuff.....
02 Jan 2004 to 04 JAN 2004
Haha today we having Sec 1 oreintation camp. fortunately make new friends like Hwee Xiang. Had a lot of laughter. lol ever since we met hwee xiang me and daron called him vegi boy which in the end almost our whole cohort called him vegi boy. sounds mean but how mean can Sec 1s be anyway?
02 Jan 2004
OMG first day in secondary school. well go 1E1 so scary xia i onli know a few ppl in my class. the form teacher Ms.Ang Guat Hong ar look so firece. stare there lke gg to kill u like tt. Well anyway at least still got old friends like Daron Chua to talk to. Not tt i antisocial juz tt i still very shy. FYI i knew Daron like since Pri 1 so can still communicate although losing touch since Pri 4.
05 Dec 1991 to 01 Jan 2004
Well many event happened but unfortunatley i sufer from short term memory loss commonly known as STML or Dory illness
05 Dec 1991
Hi guys today i was born into this world. My purpose to enter this beloved world is to show love and bring smiles to everyone in the world
Rain
5:50 AM
My frends who have helped play a certain part in my life
Thank You so Much for helping one way or another
I Love u Guys
Important dates to remember:
~22 May 2011~The first time Guan Rong didi became my di~
~18 Jan 2011~My bet with Julian didi~
~11 Sept 2010~The first time i met with Julian didi at Joel's birthday party~
~9 July 2010~ Terence didi became my di~
~3 Mar 2010~The first time i met with erzi during parents-teacher meeting
~3 June 2009~ The first time i met with Qiu Lin
sis at her house~
~22 May 2009~The first time i met with eugene
didi at Plaza Sing~
~3 Dec 2008~The first time i met with baobei
didi at Montfort Secondary School~
~26 July 2008~The first time i met with piggy
didi at victoria concert hall~
~8 Jan 2007~The first time i met with darling
didi at mss~
~3 Jan 2007~The first time i met with shadow
didi at MSS~
~31 Mar 2007~The first time i met with carrot
didi at Whitley Sec~
~16 June 2006~The first time i met with cute
didi at Victoria Concert Hall~
My name is Rainald Francis Xavier Lim Rui Nan...
Juz call me Rain for short...
Online names are darkprophecies and rainandshine217...
Im Juz an average 18 yr old kid with no outstanding qualities bah...
Borned on the day 5 dec 1991...
Saggitarus is my sign...
Fav food is friend rice...
Fav color is baby blue...
Im currently teacing in Montfort Secondary School this year...
Im in the Montfort Sec Sch Alumni Band and Montfort Junior School alumni...
Im Single but cared for by my loved ones...
Im a Roman Catholic...
My dream is to become somone who can serve the world...
Juz like wad God asked us to do...
Im oso a very lonely person...
Always alone de
Its not tt im antisocial...
its juz tt im not a person ppl like sticking with
i wana make frendz...
those who r willing to stick by me for everything...
those who can hear my probs understand me and love me
I oso wana find someone who is willing
to spend time to understand me...
Others go for chio girls and stuff....
But im simple...
I go for simple girls who can understand and treasure love...
Im oso a very sensitive person and very emotional de...
so if u see anything happen to me...well dun be shocked...
Im oso a so-called psychologist bah...
got any sch family or wadeva problems can find me...
I dun mind listening or helping...
anyway im oso a very gentle person...
who doesnt like to pick fights or quarrels de
cos i dun believe in violence
im oso somone who fight for justice or for LOVE!!!
im somone who give in to ppl de so very easily get bullied de lar
I come from a family of 14...
My mum, my jiejie, my korkor, my 8 didis, my 4 meimeis
My interests:
Duno. Not sure. Anything tt interests me haha
Maybe listening to music?
Playing my flute and saxaphone?
And oso spending time with my loved ones bah
And erm playing maple? for the sake of my frendz?
btw if u wan add me darrkshadow currently lev88 chiefdit
and darrkmagic lev 154 Bishop (my main)
Add me on msn darkprophecies@hotmail.com
Things/PPL I like/love :
~Playing my Pearl flute~
~Playing my alto Saxaphone(haha im not onli a flute player =p)~
~Playing my dizi~
~Playing my guitar~
~Playing my keyboard~
~Playing maple~
~Hanging out with friends doing nothing~
~Staring at Clouds~
~TAlking and playing with my B34r5
(carrot aka tigger, tomato aka pooh, croco aka crocodile, frosty aka snowman mickey, simba, pong pong aka bolster, sparky aka pikachu, fireball aka charmander)~
~making new friends~
~Sitting on the beach alone at night hearing the wind and waves~
~Staring to the night sky watching stars with somone~
~To love, care and understand somone~
~My mummy ( both real life and maple)~
~My kor and jie~
~My 9 dearest Didis~
~My 4 Wonderful meimeis~
My Greatest wish:
~To be with my loved ones forever~
~To go star gazing with my loved ones
(granted by baobei didi at vivo sky garden on 4 Jan 2009)~
~To sit at the beach with my loved ones enjoying the waves and the starz
(granted by cute didi on 5 dec 2007)~
~To see my loved ones smile everytime~
Things i want:
~A powell platinum flute (Lol 60k... wun come so easily)~
~A Panflute (coming soon ^^)~
~A Soprano Sax (after my flute is cleared)~
~A Violin~ (after my soprano)~
~A husky softtoy(any kind souls get it for my bdae?)~
~Somone who can love and care for me~
~Somone who understands me~
~Somone to be there for me 24/7 ~
Things I HATE:
~PPl who backstab others~
~Ppl who lie to me or hide things from me~
~Ppl who dun mean wad they say~
~Ppl who break promises~
~Ppl who breaks my heart~
~Hao Lian, Guai Lan, Xia Lan Kia~(ppl who r HL,XL,GL u shd noe who u r! stay away form me!)
~Ppl who insult or hurt my love ones!
(if i noe who u r u will get it from me!)~
In the event that i insulted anyone TOO BAD
Cos its ur fault u fall under these category
Rain's 3 rules:
~Thou shall not backstab me or my loved ones~
~Thou shall not lie to me or keep things from me~
~Thou shall not break my heart~
~Whoever break any of this 3 rules... pls dun bother coming back to look for me~
My Motto:
Mother Theresa once said
" People are often unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered;
Forgive them anyway.
If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives;
Be kind anyway.
If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies;
Succeed anyway.
If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you;
Be honest and frank anyway.
What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight;
Build anyway.
If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous;
Be happy anyway.
The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow;
Do good anyway.
Give the world the best you have,
and it may never be enough;
Give the world the best you've got anyway.
You see, in the final analysis,
it is between you and God;
It was never between you and them anyway."
wadeva we do, we should remember that we do it willingly not for other ppl...
so we shd care onli wad we think about our actions...
and not how others think about us...
Post update daily at 2200 =) For those who dun noe pls click on the square pics on top of post area<<< to view posts